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15847324 No.15847324 [Reply] [Original]

>caught jacking off in the men's washroom
>it's my second warning
>meeting with HR on Wednesday

>> No.15847366
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15847366

Threaten lawsuit for violation of your privacy rights for insinuating that your "wacking it" when in reality your doing some "medically required stimulation" for the successfully evacuation of your urine.

>> No.15847373

>>15847324
Topkek

>> No.15847379

>>15847324
stop being a fucking pussy and turn this shity situation into your favor. get creative and do it or you deserve to get shit canned

>> No.15847390

>>15847324
Just tell them you identify as a Coomer, and that they are oppressing you.

>> No.15847430

>>15847366
idk about threatening a lawsuit but this might actually be a good idea - telling them it's some kind of medical procedure and not actually wacking off?

>> No.15847448

Just show up to the meeting and pretend like nothing happened

>> No.15847459

>>15847324
My life so fucking sad I jack off all the time in the bathroom at work go home and drink myself to sleep when will it end I just wanna die I smoke two packs a day

>> No.15847473

>>15847324
should have raped whoever caught you and blackmailed them into keeping quiet

>> No.15847489
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15847489

>>15847324
based and coompilled

I used to do this all the time OP. Who the fuck is the pussy who reported you? You were using a stall at least, right?

>>15847459
break the cycle anon. jack off at the park this weekend, get some sun. bring your flask!

also dubs and I tell you fags a story about the time my buddy fucked the cleaning lady in the men's room at work

>> No.15847491
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15847491

>>15847430
just tell him you have that condition where your foreskin hardens unless you fap regularly

>> No.15847507

>>15847473
This girl is a thinker

>> No.15847509

>>15847489
Here’s my dubs spill the beans

>> No.15847691

>>15847509
Close, so I'll give it to you

>buddy working late
>small firm, so he's last one in the office besides cleaning lady
>usually when this happens they make flirtatious eye contact that goes nowhere; they both want to keep the job and she no habla ingles
>but today she lingers after cleaning around his desk
>their eyes meet
>buddy goes for it, eye fucks her
>shesintoit.vid
>"Anon!"
>buddy smiles
>"esposa?"
>translate.google.com
>"uhhhh . . . no, no esposa"
>hotandbothered.shortfatlatina
>"Anon . . . necesita limpio el bano"
>"The bathroom?"
>"Si, el bano"
>gives him the look
>he follows her into the bathroom
>they fuck loud and dirty, him bending her over the sink
>doesn't even use a condom
>after he finishes he packs up and leaves
>she cleans the bathroom

He's not chad but he's 6'3", in case anyone is wondering why she risked her job to fuck him

goodnight faggots, link will be $2.45 when we wake up

>> No.15847752

>>15847324

Lmao tell them to give you some fucking privacy. Do they expect you to jack off in your office?

>> No.15847777

>>15847324
Just make sure to whack it in the women's washroom from now on like a normal guy.

>> No.15847831

>>15847691
Your friend is a degenerate but that is hilarious

>> No.15847850
File: 289 KB, 1417x960, manawsEQxqblHqGDftEic1acXVUbgKRQNWw7KEncwMk.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15847850

>>15847691
That's how Arnold Schwarzenegger's good son was born.

>> No.15847874
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15847874

>>15847489
Rolling. Was she Hispanic?

>> No.15847945

>>15847324
I doubt this.

How did you get caught? You were presumably using a stall and cleaning up after yourself, right?

>> No.15848470

>>15847430
fucking tell them you aren't speaking about your prostate issues without your lawyer present, then they'll shut the fuck up

>> No.15848488

>>15847491
top kek

>> No.15848498

>>15848470
Solid advice.

>> No.15849378

>>15847489
Rollllllllllan 4 dubs

>> No.15849399

>>15847366
This is not honorable. Man must not tell lies.

>>15847430
This is a lie. A honorable man does not lie.

>> No.15849498

>>15847691
> link will be $2.45 when we wake up
$2.43 when I woke up...this fella is the Warren Buffet of our generation.