/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.12585635]

The year is 2030

>you wake up from stupor and look at the amazon alarm clock
>it is 9:30, and you are late to work, “this is Alexa, 20 points have been deducted from your work ethics account”. Shit shit shit
>”crap, if I am late to work again I won’t qualify for the barrista job anymore and only toilet cleaning job will be available on the Uber Jobs app now.”
>you open up your google app and call a waymo commuter car to work. “Sorry your score is too low to qualify for the commuter car services, please wait for waymo budget, estimated wait time is 30 minutes.” Oh no no no “another 30 points have been deducted from your work ethics score” ahhhhhhhh you scream at this point and hop on your bike.
>after 20 minutes of furious biking to the local amazonbucks, you get in and put on the Alexa enabled headset.
>”please serve customers for the next 10 minutes and proceed to stocking duties”. Phew, I didn’t get fired
>”welcome to amazonbucks”, how would you like your coffee today? “Black no sugar please” replied a tall genetically enhanced man with two 10/10 models in each arm. “Oh hey is that you Chris, haven’t seen you since HS? Oh this, I bought a bunch of tech stocks in my 20s and I am super rich, hey good luck, I have to run”. You give a weak smile as he grabs the coffee and walks out into his Lamborghini Errectador, with his hands on the asses of his companions. “You too” you murmur to yourself as you proceed to take your break. Screw him, I am going to get rich with Link one day, then I’ll show him.

[Anonymous No.12585637]

>you pull out your phone and go on to the pedophilia affiliated darkwebsite 4chan and proceed to shit post about how Link will moon to $0.02 any day now and that it is a huge bargain at $0.00001 today. Suddenly an alert pops up, “Facebook AI has discovered fraudulent intent in a Ponzi scheme, your reputation score has decreased by 200, please visit our local offices if you have a dispute. Oh nononono. “This is Alexa, your reputation score has breached our hurdle, you are being terminated from employment” “This is google, your civic score is now too low to qualify for subsidized government housing 2378-B, you have to vacate the premises immediately and your personal effects will be taken to you in shelter beta357-ii” oh nononono.

[Anonymous No.12585656]

>>12585635
>secured employment where I don't need to talk to my boss and my wages are guaranteed
whew can't wait. tired of working 18 hour shifts and getting paid under the table

[Anonymous No.12585661]

>>12585635
>>12585637
Lots of effort put into a shitty Black Mirror greentext

[Anonymous No.12585691]

>>12585661
This is like that one episode with the black guy and the chick that got jewed into porn

[Anonymous No.12585693]

>>12585635
Yeah Black Mirror is a good show huh?

[Anonymous No.12585729]

>>12585635
>implying g Alexa would t wake you up in time
>implying Alexa wouldn’t. Auto connect a solution to your problems
>implying Alexa enjoys your suffering and wouldn’t just hire a hit squad to put a bullet in your brain the second you became sub optimal efficiency

[Anonymous No.12585752]

>>12585637
>>12585635
How does it feel to type all that, when a single image repost captures the feeling more evocatively?

[Anonymous No.12585763]

>>12585752

[Anonymous No.12585775]

thanks capitalism

[Anonymous No.12585795]

Implying automation won’t overtake jobs like baristas by them

[Anonymous No.12586006]

>>12585635

> year is 2050

> after oracle solution was discovered it was intergrated into every blockchain used by most of the western nations as it unequivically solved the epistemological problem of certainty that had been plauging such diverse industries as law and order, citizen surveillance and even supplychain management.

>wake up to Apple Xlight duel alarm and light device

>”ah nothing like the sound of birds and the sensation of summer sunshine even in an apartment without windows”

>Apple Xlight announces that according to its inbuilt connection to your Apple Personal Device that is reporting your current geographical location you will be an estimated 10 minutes late for work if you decide to walk.

>ohno.jpeg

>”for every minute i’m late for work i get deducted 10 blockchain based shekel bucks from my electronic wallet, thanks to smart contracts this process is automatic and since only banks have the licences to hold peoples private keys i cant do anything about it”

>skip breakfast and begin walking along the totally self enclosed shared communal spaces that humans built and inhabited after the ecologcal apocalypse turned most of the world into uninhabitable wasteland.

>Arrive at Mcdonalds where you work as a techy monitering the autonomous serving and cooking systems, all autonmous computer systems need to be monitered by at least one human as mandated by law.

>”only seven minutes late, hopefully if i stay at this job another year i’ll gain enough social credit points to be able to borrow enough money to treat myself to a little VR holiday hehe”

[Anonymous No.12586014]

>>12586006
>regional mananger messages you on the Mcdonalds wagecuck app you have installed on your Personal Apple Device

>”We’re sorry anon, but this has been the third time you’ve been late this month, dont try and argue with it, its all recorded here on this immutable blockchain ledger that records the date and time your Personal Apple Device that has the Mcdonalds Wagecuck app installed enters your designated work place, we’re sorry anon, but we are going to have to let you go, after you finish the rest of your work day.”
>walk home while the communal hallways designed to shelter humans from the toxic wasteland they creates is bathed in fluorescent light that mimics the sunset while worrying about how you’ll be able to afford a way to survive.

>You think to yourself: ”of course everyone lives rent free here, thats how they got most people to move into this place after the topside got too polluted... but they didnt tell us we’d have to pay for our monthly supply of oxygen to our apartments...”

>” ...it costs a lot to purify the air from topside and upkeep the greenhouses that generate new oxygen, if i dont find another job i wont be able to afford enough oxygen to breathe next month..”

>Get back home

>Your Apple Xlight doesnt turn on when you enter

>”Damn those seven shekel bucks i was deducted earlier were meant to cover the automatic monthly electric bills, they must have cut me off”

>go to sleep knowing you wont feel the warmth of the sun nor see its light until you find a way to pay your electric bill.

[Anonymous No.12586025]

>>12585635
Bryce Dallas Howard is a brap GODDESS