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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

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12574975 No.12574975 [Reply] [Original]

>mother comes home and catches me using her sybian in my ass while I sniffed her dirty panties
>she doesn't know that I have sexual needs too
>as soon as she enters and drops her mouth I see her tounge and imagine what it would feel like wrapped around my weenie
>this combined with the prostate orgasm I had been building up from the sybian causes me to blow a huge cum load all over her Persian rug
>she begins to scream "YOU SICK FUCK!! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!"
>this breaks my heart and I run out of the room crying from sadness.
>she is threatening to kick me out of the house guys because I used her sex toys
>she didn't understand that I have sexual needs too
>mfw I'm a 33 year old virgin with no real life skills and never had a job before
>mfw I'm going to be homeless by the end of the week and have no where to go

Guys please you have to help me!!! I have never held a job before because my mom works as a school teacher and pays for everything. She's paid for my cellphone bill, my car insurance, my gas for my car and all my Internet bills.

So far to my name I have 10,000 link tokens and I am holding strong and I believe in sergey and the singularity. Please guys you have to help me. I'm about to be homeless and stranded if I can't figure it out. My only hope is that I can find a lawyer who will defend me in court and I can battle my mother for my right to stay in the house.

Are there any lawyers here who can give me some advice? boomers should not have the right to get away with everything. They had the easiest life by buying real estate for 2% of what it costs now!!! Help me biz please!!!

>> No.12574989

>>12574975
oh man, I haven't seen this thread in like, a year

>> No.12575031

Fuck off u pasta posting faggot

>> No.12575041

the absolute state of linkies

>> No.12575069

>>12574975
>not cleaning the sybian off with your mouth
I'd have kicked you out too you filthy animal.

>> No.12575073
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12575073

>she is threatening to kick me out of the house guys because I used her sex toys

>> No.12575131

I just looked it up and sybians cost 1300 fucking dollars. what kind of woman would pay for that besides maybe a camwhore? i jack off all the time and have never sunk low enough to even shell out 80 bucks or whatever for a fleshlight

>> No.12575330

>>12575131
>23:56:06
My roomate bought me one as a "joke". His brother moved out and had left his love seat in the basement bedroom I now occupied. I took that "suc-u-dry" fleshlight and stuffed it in the cushion against the arm rest of the love seat. While watching porn, I Went to pound town in the most comfortable hands free position. The cap unscrewed, leaking my bust all inside his brothers loveseat. I threw the can in the corner and forgot about it. A month later, my roomate handed me an eviction notice because we had become passive aggressive towards eachother, no longer friends. After I moved out, he moved his brothers loveseat upstairs and bragged to me about how he recieved head from his sugar momma on it. Little did he know, I left my stain on the seat already, and that "joke" was now on him.