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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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12320690 No.12320690[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

>go on okcupid date with 18 year old high school girl
>sorta chubby but big titties
>rented a hotel room before meeting her at park
>investment pays off and take her back to fuck her
>turns out she's a virgin
>fast forward a couple of weeks
>wife discovered i booked a hotel room for one
>she freaks out and accusses me of having an affair
>reveal to her i am not and if i tell her she has to promise not to tell anyone
>tell her im an arms dealer for gangs in chicago
>tell elaborate story about how i graduated from drugs to guns and had to go back dealing after struggling with tile installation company
>she starts crying and tells me she doesn't want me get killed and to quit
>tell her i still need to do 2 more deals and I'm done
>we have amazing sex that night
>behaves more attentive around me now

Did I do good /biz/? Also why can't I feel bad about this?

>> No.12320722

>>12320690
8/10 LARP read whole post

>> No.12320736

>>12320690
based if true, had a good kek
did you actually plan the backstory beforehand or just went with the flow?

>> No.12320739

>>12320690
Yo if you post here and your wife is that retarded, I hope you don't plan on having kids.

>> No.12320746

Lol what a cuck

I fuck them in my truck

>> No.12320761

>>12320736
I made it up on the fly. It sounds sick but I enjoy lying since I don't know how to behave as myself with people irl.

>>12320739
Incognito tabs

>> No.12320775

>>12320746
I've done that before and I disliked that. I like the comfort of privacy and not worry some fucking kid is recording me fuck.

>> No.12320777

>>12320761
elaborate more on the story you told her. does ur personality fit that of a gun dealer at all? how could she be that dumb to fall for it?

>> No.12320795

so these are the faggots who whine online about being "divorce raped"

hope you enjoy paying alimony faggot

>> No.12320800
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12320800

>>12320690
>Did I do good /biz/? Also why can't I feel bad about this?
Hmm lets see, adultery and casual sex. Both forms propagated by the Jew. I'd say both you and the jews will hang from the highest lampposts during this century.

>> No.12320867
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12320867

>>12320761
>I don't know how to behave as myself with people irl.
extremely relatable, sometimes it feels like i have no personality at all and i just gotta assume a role i saw to compensate for it, guess this is the price of autism

>> No.12320890

>>12320690
>/biz/ - Business & Finance

>> No.12320891

laughed so hard. thank you

>> No.12320898

>>12320777
I'm not writing everything in verbatim but I'll give you a green text.

>wife knows i used to live in shitty side of Chicago as a teen
>mention some classmates name who was a drug dealer and got killed(this actually happened)
>drug dealer had gangbanger older brother who asked me if i still needed to find work out of respect for his deceased little brother
>makes me drop offs while being monitored by another associate
>cops don't recognise me so they don't hassle me like they would with other gang members
>eventually start to rank up and make contacts for other distributors who pay more

>> No.12320906

>>12320690
gr8 but could use more details next time

>> No.12320915

>>12320761
>I don't know how to behave as myself with people irl
holy shit iktf

>> No.12320929

but where did you hide the chandelier?

>> No.12321005

>>12320867
Yea I think I do have autism. Sometimes I'll get a song stuck in my head and purposely eavesdrop on random people to copy and paste their words to match the lyrics of the song in my head.

I also sometimes visualize people without the skin on their faces when talking to them. I find it silly picturing this which makes me smile which makes me appear friendly

>> No.12321091
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12321091

>>12321005
>I also sometimes visualize people without the skin on their faces when talking to them
>I find it silly picturing this which makes me smile which makes me appear friendly

Autism is the least of your worries OP.

>> No.12321110

Doesn’t she want to know where the extra money is?

>> No.12321133
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12321133

>>12321005
>>12321091
>I've got one that can see!

>> No.12321143

>>12320690

Your marriage will end in divorce eventually.

Also your wife will end up cheating on you if you continue with this kind of thing, it's inevitable. Good luck.

>> No.12321146

>>12321110
Told her the tile company was struggling as I couldn't make cuts unless I wanted to lose some of the valuable sub contractors I've been working for awhile now

>> No.12321158

>>12321110
This.

>> No.12321389

>>12320690
why isn't there a single hot woman on okcupid

>> No.12321541

>>12321005
When people annoy me I stick my hand into my pocket so I can covertly flip them off while they keep flapping their damn lips.

>> No.12321604

>>12320898

Theres no way shell continue to believe that. She'll ask you for more details, you'll fumble, and youll either get dumped or become her cuck

You're fucked, buy Link and dont tell her.. thats your only way out

>> No.12321630

>>12320690
>books hotel room before meeting the girl
Bull. Fucking. Shit.

>> No.12321714

>>12320690

This is the way to keep a woman, invent drama so she doesn't feel the need to do it herself. This way the drama is on your own terms. Best defense is good offense, well done.

>> No.12322316

Holy fuck op you got some skills if you made that funny shit up on the spot.

>> No.12322638

>>12320690
Haha nice story man, I'm going to post this to r/greentext if you don't mind?