"get a job bro"

[Anonymous No.12105739]

>be me
>apply for wagecuck job as a Park Keeper with the city
>pays $10/hr 20 hours a week
>ez mode
>back and forth with old white boomer bitch for 2 weeks
>finally called in for an interview
>expecting it to be a formality and hired on the spot
>walk into her office
>literally 4 fucking people in the room
>proceeds to tell me the job is literally just picking up trash, changing light bulbs, and trimming bushes
>actually starts asking me questions
>tell her I have oil field experience
>"Have you ever used hand tools before anon?"
>"Yes, of course"
>"Which ones?"
>...
>list all the hand tools I've ever used
>"Have you ever used a lawn mower or a weed whacker before?"
>"Yes, of course, I mowed the lawn growing up all the time"
>"What sort of lawn mower?"
>"Um..a push mower"
>"Oh...Well...Our lawn mowers are a bit different..."
>I can already tell where this is going
>I remain calm and collected on the exterior
>want to murder her inside
>boomer memes racing through my head
>think of /biz/
>interview finally ends
>expecting her to extend a job offer
>"Well anon...we still have more interviews to go through, so we'll be in touch"

Holy shit, fuck this gay ass country. If I have to get on welfare because I can't even get hired for some fucking bullshit job like picking up trash in a park, all you motherfuckers are going to pay until the day I die because I'm never getting off it. This shit is fucking absurd.

[Anonymous No.12105758]

>>12105739
This is pathetic. You're browsing /biz/ and you can't leverage your computer skills for some bullshit IT job somewhere?

[Anonymous No.12105774]

>he only has experience with push mowers
>expects to make it in a globalized highly technologically advanced 21st century economy
Not gon make it, dude. Better luck next life

[Anonymous No.12105778]

>>12105739
Which country?

Have you thought about being less of a faggot?

[Anonymous No.12105779]

>>12105739
kek, what the fuck.

>be me
>apply for operator job
>pays 13€/hour
>say i'm not really handy
>no interview
>hired on the spot
>they assign the most difficult machine to me
>been stressing for couple of weeks now, because this shit is fucking difficult

[Anonymous No.12105783]

>>12105739

You cant expect to get hired when your competitors all have grounds-keeping degrees.

The Park keeper is a sacred profession which requires great knowledge passed down through the generations. Merely being able to use a "weed whacker"/mower isn't even half the job.

[Anonymous No.12105785]

>>12105778
Israel's Greatest Ally

[Anonymous No.12105787]

>>12105758
>biz
>computer skills

>inb4 4chan

[Anonymous No.12105798]

>>12105739
good post, I wish you luck on killing as many bizraelites as possible, we deserve it

[Anonymous No.12105813]

>tfw only push mower experience

Kek this is Texas Roadhouse tier

[Anonymous No.12105842]

>>12105739
>look for paid training jobs/apprenticeships in my area
>"1 year or more experience required"
>"must have good knowledge of etc."
I want to kill the fucking boomers who misadvertise this shit, if the job requires a fucking year of experience it's not a fucking apprenticeship. Every apprenticeship I look up requires at leaat one year experience I shit you not. Gas the boomers age war now.

[Anonymous No.12105844]

>>12105783
PhD in groundskeeping here.
I don't know why high school graduates try to apply for these jobs; you need to at least have a masters degree in "fields" AND in the field of "groundskeeping" (if you have to ask what the difference is, you're not gonna make it)
Have fun at McDonalds OP while I'm outside enjoying the nice day and chatting with jogger MILFs before banging them in the restrooms. Yeah whenever those bathrooms are under "maintenance" what's really going on is that your mom is getting dicked hard in the restroom. And in the end I always finish the whole thing on by urinating on them. MILF housewives are so desparate and emotionally stunted. I think I might have even fathered a few children that way. One bitch even told me she wanted to get back at her husband for cheating on her by having me knock her up so he'd have to raise another kid that wasn't even his.

[Anonymous No.12105859]

>>12105842
Which country?

[Anonymous No.12105868]

>>12105859
USA

[Anonymous No.12105883]

>>12105842
Just lie and say you have experience, if they want to know where then find a related business that has recently gone out of business and tell them you used to work there, they won't be able to call them and check and you have a good excuse for why you aren't working there anymore.

[Anonymous No.12105902]

>>12105868
Look for autocad/3D design apprenticeships. I'm in the UK but had a quick look on your govt website, some said they are looking to train people from scratch. You can find them for civil eng, structural, auto and more. There's a lot of work for good design technicians

[Anonymous No.12105917]

>>12105739
wow I'd fucking unironically kill myself if not a larp

[Anonymous No.12105921]

>>12105739
>push mowers
you fucked up anon

[Anonymous No.12105925]

>>12105902
Worth looking into, thanks
>>12105883
Yes then I get to look like a jerk off for not knowing what tool does what

[Anonymous No.12105933]

>>12105844
>One bitch even told me she wanted to get back at her husband for cheating on her by having me knock her up so he'd have to raise another kid that wasn't even his.

[Anonymous No.12105986]

>>12105739
Why should they hire you when they can hire Pedro for half as much and has more experience cutting lawns?

[Anonymous No.12106003]

>>12105739
>"Oh...Well...Our lawn mowers are a bit different..."
>I can already tell where this is going
This shit pissed me off. I hate boomers, too. They think everyone is as stupid as them. Using a lawn mower is not rocket science.

[Anonymous No.12106004]

>>12105739
>be me
>apply for merchandising position
>get called same day
>offered job on the spot with no interview
>company is located in a different state
>no training or anything they just tell me to show up at a Ralph’s and stock wine n shiet
>get there
>already 5 niggas from the same company working the cabinet
>help them for 30 minutes
>ayo we done for the nite lil nigga
>go home
>got paid for 8 hours that night

I stopped going in about 2 months ago and still turn in my time card. It’s free money and this job pays 15/hr

[Anonymous No.12106020]

>>12105739
>literally underqualified to be a janitor
/biz/

[Anonymous No.12106026]

>>12105844
Top kek best larp I’ve seen in a while

[Anonymous No.12106035]

>>12106020
In todays world everyone who hasn't already been a janitor is unqualified to be a janitor.

[Anonymous No.12106063]

>>12106035
>not spending a year working as a janitor for free to get the experience
That's why you don't have a job, it's because you can't be bothered to walk around a park for a year picking up shit.

[Anonymous No.12106067]

>>12105739
just be urself brah

[Anonymous No.12106104]

>>12105842
omg are some people dense, it's a test if can bullshit, don't you know you always lie about your experience and skills

[Anonymous No.12106144]

>>12106020

[Anonymous No.12106208]

>>12106063
>work for nothing to have the experience required to work for next to nothing
ayy lmao

[Anonymous No.12106637]

>>12106004
You lucky fucker lol

[Anonymous No.12106799]

bump

[Anonymous No.12106853]

>>12105842
fucking this, even the internships man

[Anonymous No.12106948]

>>12105739
Unironically you need to lie as some of these interviews. If it is a skill that is fairly easy to learn but you dont know it just lie, and learn the skill before the job starts

[Anonymous No.12106979]

>>12106026
>larp

[Anonymous No.12107046]

>>12105739
>"Oh...Well...Our lawn mowers are a bit different..."

Fairly sure if you don't get the job you could ask her what she meant by this snarky comment and that you wanted to show that you could work hard even with the most basic equipment but it CLEARLY went over her head. Also ask her how you can complain or reach one of the 4 other people that heard her make this snarky comment and take it to her boss.

[Anonymous No.12107092]

>>12105779
> not very handy
> gets the most difficult machine

Lol what!?

[Anonymous No.12107106]

>>12105779
Talk about failing upwards, did they hire the wrong guy? no offence m8 but if someone said they weren't very handy being an operator on a plant machine is the last thing I'd hire them to.

[Anonymous No.12107114]

>>12106020
>mfw can't even be a jannie for free

[Anonymous No.12107116]

>>12107092
>>12107106
Yeah, i know. I guess they value honesty?

[Anonymous No.12107968]

>>12106004
>company located in a different state...

can nobody see how shit this system is? I noticed this in the US often, you move across the country for average jobs? Fuck that shit, a human has become product.

[Anonymous No.12108155]

>>12105844
Kek

[Anonymous No.12108638]

>>12105739

[Anonymous No.12109219]

bump

[Anonymous No.12109801]

>>12105739
>>pays $10/hr 20 hours a week - - ez mode

I guess this is why a lot of people are craving to get that job

[Anonymous No.12109837]

Imagine being so useless and unqualified you can't even get a job picking up trash and mowing lawns. Imagine being so lazy you actually want a shitty 10hr/20 hrs a week job just to scrape by in mediocrity.

[Anonymous No.12109862]

>Apply for job where attention to language is key
>accidentally CTRL+V a text paragraph right before saving and exiting Word.

My fault for not double-checking, I guess.

I immediately sent another one without the mistake and apologized profusely, but the damage is already done ;_;

[Anonymous No.12110577]

>>12105844
wtf did I just read

[Anonymous No.12111164]

>>12109837
wasting your life in a meaningless rat race isn't any better

[Anonymous No.12111320]

>>12105779
If they hire you so quickly, it usually means the job has a high turnover rate and/or they don't expect to keep you long. I've been through a similar experience before in a factory. They don't really train you. It's sink or swim.

[Anonymous No.12111360]

>>12105844
mods please sticky this

[Anonymous No.12111500]

>>12109837
I remember when I was your age, my first job, so eager to work hard. You'll get over it soon and realize there's more to life than money, such as your time.

[Anonymous No.12111501]

Its probably not about what you said, its how you said it. Also, they probably use riding mowers and considering that it takes like 10 minutes to understand how to ride one, you probably should have lied.
Even shitty warehouse jobs usually require forklift license, which is retarded easy to get.

[Anonymous No.12111552]

>>12105844
this is such a good post ive read it like 5 times today and kekt each time

[Anonymous No.12111589]

It's probably because you were ugly. HR women think emotionally, so unless you make them wet with your chiseled jaw you don't really stand a chance. Stop being ugly.

[Anonymous No.12111819]

>>12111589
lol

[Anonymous No.12112070]

>>12105844

/thread

[Anonymous No.12112175]

>>12105739
Lmao. I got a job as a cell phone tech without even trying. As a matter of fact I was trying NOT to get hired because I wanted to keep living the NEET life.
The only reason I even went in was to get my mom off my back.
>go into interview.
>dont really act interested.
>totally unshaven
>boss asks me if I smoke pot
>say yes hoping I won't get hired
>boss says they all smoke pot there and he'll warn me a few months ahead of a drug test.
>get hired
You have to be a literal retard to not be able to get a job in this economy.

[Anonymous No.12112223]

>>12105739
>Went for a job interview.
>End up bullshitting with the guy about kayaking and building houses for 30 minutes.
>"I only hire guys I get along with" and hired on the spot.
>Kayak and drink with my boss every other weekend.

It's been a pretty chill 2 years at this job.

[Anonymous No.12112241]

>>12105739
>Public job
>Interviewing
Ok, anon, that's not how it works. Canvass for one of your city council members or volunteer for the mayor's campaign. THEN mention your interest in parks.

[Anonymous No.12112402]

>>12111500
lol doesnt mean you need to settle for a shit tier 10 an hr 20 hour a week job

[Anonymous No.12112665]

>>12106004
What compamy is this with?

[Anonymous No.12112707]

>>12106004
>>12112665
I want to know as well.

[Anonymous No.12113262]

>>12112175
>>boss asks me if I smoke pot
>>say yes hoping I won't get hired
>>boss says they all smoke pot there and he'll warn me a few months ahead of a drug test.
kek

[Anonymous No.12113279]

>>12105739
>get my degree in Park Meme Recreation with a minor in Emergency Lawn Care
>be in an interview with three other autists
>one of them is called up first, a big meathead, wooh great that I dont have to go first
>says he has oil field experience
>fuck fuck fuck, the job is gone
>the white sjw HR bitch asks him if he ever operated a lawn mower before
>he only operated push mowers

lol ez pz, job is in the bag.

[Anonymous No.12113326]

>>12105739
>Only a pushmower
Anon you need to have ridden something with some horses behind it to get a REAL mans job *sips*.

[Anonymous No.12113332]

>>12113326
It's funny. Because I've used both regular lawn mowers and push mowers and it's much harder work using a push mower than it is using a gas mower. They must have really thought he was a retard to not be able to figure out how to use a gas mower.

[Anonymous No.12113341]

>>12113332
It's just classic boomerism, overselling the job, subconsciously working to guard their position in society as the worthless cunts they are.

[Anonymous No.12113370]

>>12113341
I still don't feel any sympathy for you. I'm the one who made this post:
>>12112175 The only reason my ID is different is because I'm posting on my computer now and when I made my previous post I was posting from my phone on the shitter.
It's not hard to get a job these days.

[Anonymous No.12113376]

>>12113341
>>12113370
nvm id stayed the same. My point still stands.

[Anonymous No.12113378]

>>12105739

Just stop being poor :DDDDD

[Anonymous No.12113403]

>>12105844
brilliant execution

[Anonymous No.12113411]

I fucking hate taxes.

[Anonymous No.12113421]

>>12105739
>working for the government
Yeah it’s $10 an hour but you are getting full benefits.

[Anonymous No.12113435]

>>12105739
fucking kek. thanks for making me laugh

>the plight of wagekeks

[Anonymous No.12113450]

>>12105844
>One bitch even told me she wanted to get back at her husband for cheating on her by having me knock her up so he'd have to raise another kid that wasn't even his.

as if i needed more reasons to hate women

[Anonymous No.12113463]

>>12113370
You got lucky fag, fuck off

[Anonymous No.12113479]

GET OFF 4CHAN OR YOU'RE FIRED ANON!

[Anonymous No.12113480]

>>12113463
Go look for another job. Quit crying about it. You should set your sights higher than Mexican tier jobs anyway.

[Anonymous No.12113520]

>Be me
>Done works already, got paid in "experience" (slaved away for free to have something to put in my curriculum vitae)
>Work as a theater actor, I love the job but the pay sucks because the state poorly regulates the job and also takes away most of my earnings in taxes
>Look for a second job
>All I find are boomers looking for 18 years olds with 908 years of experience in the field who want to get paid in "experience"
>When I find something decent, it has some bullshit requirement such as "must have russian as his mother tongue" or "must be willing to relocate for indefinite period of time in any place in the world when asked"
>Finally find a job I could aplly for, basic shit for the train industry, but it'll do
>All things related to trains are owned by the state. To be employed by the state in my country you need to score 70\100 on your high school final exam or have a degree
>I scored 60 because there was no school dedicated to acting and I had to study it privately on the side, giving up having good grades
I'm seriously thinking of faking a handicap, that way I'll just have to pretend I'm a retard and I'll get a job as a school janitor or some shit. I'm 22, I just want to learn how to fucking move a box in a warehouse or pick up plants from the ground so I can keep doing what I like and studied to be able to do. I don't even wanna be rich or famous or any of that shit, I want the most mundane job possible so that I can afford to exist on my own and pursue my vocation in my motherland.
>Meanwhile parents are thinking of moving to Scotland and they say there's plenty of job offers for people who wanna learn from scratch, and there's also job offers and better pay for actors
Do I do it /biz/? Should I go wage cucking as a kilt tailor or something?

[Anonymous No.12113534]

>>12105779
High turn over shit job kid, expect to get asked to do overtime and work holidays for shit pay.

That's normal, I'm a trained operator and those shit shows always want staff yet pay shit and hire literal retards, drug addicts and murders to make products.

[Anonymous No.12113593]

>>12112175
>Your work place has compulsory drug tests
>And you are not a professional athlete

Hahaha I eat poppy seed bread before those then file discrimination claims through my union when they say I'm a coke head.

Ez money

[Anonymous No.12113880]

I just got a job it's about selling yourself anon.
I don't have a single experience but i am a strategical marketing specialist on a big corporate firm. Lol they are fuckd.

[Anonymous No.12114010]

If it makes you feel any better I had all of these exact problems when i left high school in 1998

[Anonymous No.12114051]

>>12109862
I'm lmaoing at your life.
Let me guess you ctrl v ctrl s alt f4'd?

[Anonymous No.12114098]

>>12113520
I hate to break it to you but acting is for retards. An absolute meme profession and if you aren't a twink or a chosen or a girl with nice jugs then good luck getting ahead

[Anonymous No.12114139]

>>12113520
I hate that our society even offers training or curriculum in "acting" because it's such a dead end and well intentioned people such as yourself with extremely limited world experience end up ruining their lives by pursuing it. If you want to study acting on the side, great. But it should never be part of government education, college or otherwise.

[Anonymous No.12114156]

>>12105758

>You're browsing /biz/ and you can't leverage your computer skills for some bullshit IT job somewhere?

>implying there aren't hundreds of people applying at least for every one "bullshit IT job" nowadays

[Anonymous No.12114168]

>>12113520
>Actor
Anon, how worn out are you kneepads? Its one of the first things casting directors look at!

You might even have to take it up the ass also

[Anonymous No.12114817]

>>12105842
just lie about it, I got hired as a in house graphic designer at a tech company and