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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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12102478 No.12102478 [Reply] [Original]

hey /biz/ say not me knew a guy with 150k cash of dirty money that he needed washed, and not me would get around 20% of the washed money, what would be the best way to go about that?

>> No.12102507

>>12102478
by killing yourself

>> No.12102570 [DELETED] 

>>12102478

Have you tried GE's™ new high-efficiency washers? They have over 10 different settings for all of your unique loads!

>> No.12102573

suck 150000 dicks in minecraft for $1 each and bill it as $2 per suck (not financial or legal advice, money laundering is a crime and should not be done)

>> No.12102588

>>12102570
>(not financial or legal advice, money laundering is a crime and should not be done)

(not financial or legal advice, money laundering is a crime and should not be done)

>> No.12102594

>>12102588
its just a hypothetical

>> No.12102596

>>12102478
People in the old days used to wash them by hand. Walk down by the river, use some soap, then let it hang to dry. Fresh linen smell if you wash during the spring and hang next to some blooming lavender.

>> No.12102664

Oy vey! Money laundering is a crime, stupid goy.

>> No.12102677

>>12102478
Couldn't tell you because I am a newfag

>> No.12102686

>>12102478
If you ask here you are a brainlet and you will get caught.
A web search will give you enough info to figure it out

>> No.12102763

buy monero

>> No.12102773
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12102773

>>12102478
Easiest way: buy $500 worth of prepaid mmorpg game cards at different pharmacies/gamestops/walmart. Get on blackmarket trading discords or use service like playerauctions to sell cash shop goods for virtual mmo currency. Then sell the mmo gold to chink sites or on playerauctions/trading discords. In about 5 months you probably will run through the 150k and even make some profit.

>> No.12102775

>>12102686
This....This exactly.....enjoy your felony charges OP

>> No.12102779
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12102779

>>12102478
OP location confirmed, move in

>> No.12102789

>>12102478
It's a scam you retard. You're not going to see a penny of it and you might even end up losing money on the deal. Walk away.

>> No.12102811

>>12102478
I hear there's a lot of money laundering in real estate, a relative I have is in construction and he says they buy a house with a loan, pay contractors with dirty cash to fix it up, then flip it and claim profits as legit income.

>> No.12103539

>>12102763
The hardest part is getting the cash into a form that you can buy Monero with
Your best bet is bitcoin ATM

>> No.12103561

>>12102478
Im sure you can outsmart the US government anon! They've only been doing it for like 100 years.

>> No.12103575

>>12102811
Makes sense. One bedroom houses here are so expensive. They go for 20 times the average annual salary. Probably money launderers moving money around.

>> No.12103914

>>12102478
Hypothetically you could use a casino. Go and buy in for 2500 or something, play a few hands of $25 blackjack, if you win, keep going for a bit, once you lose then stop and cash out. Repeat as often as needed. Use excuse such as the table is cold or you have to go if ever asked. Casinos don't give a fuck and can't keep up. Tons of bookies and drug dealers run their cash thru and the casino is more than happy to take its cut

>> No.12103921

>>12103914
Be careful about buying in for 10k or more in a day though as that would trigger IRS reporting requirements. Buy in for 5k a day and nothing will happen. Also could be done via slot machines. Play a few spins cash out get new money. Or, bet thru a local bookie, if you win you have clean cash (maybe...) and if you lose pay with dirty cash. In the end you'll lose a % but should end up with mostly clean cash.

>> No.12103932

>>12102478
just go straight to jail man

>> No.12103979

>>12103561
>nobody launders money ever

>> No.12104014

>>12102478
Buy gold

>> No.12104047

>>12102773
>>12102811
>>12103539
>>12103914
Brainlets. You can do that in 1 day easy if you have the right kind of business. Literally no one here will guess it tho but they are laundromats for huge amounts of money. No not a bank. You can start one yourself for like 300 bucks

>> No.12104059

>>12102478
Dude srsly dont fuck with the IRS. Its better to live without looking over your shoulder. Trust me. Pay the tax and use the money to make more money. But since tou asked i will give a hint.

Donations.

Good luck!

>> No.12104068

>>12102478
casino. nerp. go play poker for a few hundred hours or use a cash business

>> No.12104069

>>12104059
No lol. That’s how you get audited. Think of a store that takes in a shit load of cash on a regular basis

>> No.12104822

Better call Saul.

I'm confident there are plenty of ways. How about casinos etc.?

Any cash business. A guy I met once did it via a barbershop. However, I am assuming you don't already own such a business?

>> No.12105829

Or you know, incoroperate a service type business and whip up a a bunch of invoices for 300+ dollars and say you collected that much doing whatever it is. Garbage removal, fixing toilets or refrigerators, changing oil whatever how dumb can you Fucking be

>> No.12106034

>>12102478
Spend on groceries 20-30% of the time. Buy gold and silver coins to hodl. Later, sell for cash at a gold store and spend on groceries. Don't get caught by cops holding cash or they'll "forfeit" your dollar bills.

>> No.12106050

>>12102478
Buy a bunch of eth with cash and then buy some shitty erc721s from yourself. Make fake demand for your cryptokitties.

>> No.12106076

Make an artistic painting and sell it for $150k. This price is very cheap compared to what other richfags spend on art, so nobody would bat an eye

>> No.12106166

Auto loan yourself from shadow banks from lets say 140k, pay rates with the remaining 10k.

>> No.12106177

>>12106166
Auto not as if a car. I meant automatic. Whatever

>> No.12106311

>>12104047
Hints?
It isn't daycare is it?

>> No.12106331

>>12104047
lemonade stand?

>> No.12106349

>>12102478
Go to the Cayman Islands. Put the money in a trust.

>> No.12106354

>Make a shit painting
>sell it to me for 100k
>????
>profit

>> No.12106375

Buy a painting

>> No.12106376

Also 2 friends go to casino
Play roulette
Player 1 71k red and 4k 0
701k black and 4k 00
Winner gets cashier cheque
Dada. Clean money

>> No.12106593

>>12102478

>Take cash to casino
>Exchange for chips
>Gamble a little
>Exchange chips for cash
>???

>> No.12106615

>>12106593
>casinos don't have cameras

>> No.12106642

>>12106615
Lose 10%. Or 15k. Cash out the other 15k

>> No.12106805

>>12106311
You need a place that is paid in cash amd has some form of unchecked money transfer. This means any place with tipping is great because if they pay in cash then there is no way to know how much the tip was.

>> No.12106873

>>12106805
Restaurant is the obvious one but I still have no clue what he means by $300 to create.