/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.11610879]

>bought ethereum at $6
>29, still a Virgin and never been in relationship
>decide I want to go to a yoga class to find a gf
>sign up for class and find out its full of women in their 40-50 divorced
>go during the middle of the day class is packed
>didn't realize what a big mistake I had made and how aroused I would be
>mid way through the session get extreme erection
>women around me begin to notice
>start to realize what a huge mistake I've made
>old nervousness begins to set in
>hands begin to shake
>starts getting hard to breathe
>begin getting chest pains
>can't stop the pain and go down into fetal position
>class stops and someone calls an ambulance
>end up getting taken to the hospital due to suffering a panic attack
>one of the concerned women from the class came by later to check in on me
>first time a woman has ever shown interest in me
>begin getting nervous again in my hospital bed and the nurses need to come in and gives me more meds
>after I calm down the woman comes back into the room and sees if I'm okay
>begin telling her that being around women makes me nervous.
>she says there's nothing to be nervous about she's just a human
>I begin to feel comfortable for the first time in my life
>tell her I would like to go out on a date for food and she says yes
>exchange phone numbers and set up a time.

Guys this was last week and I'm beginning to get nervous again. The date is set up for tomorrow at 7:00 pm. She doesn't know I am wealthy at all and I really think she might be the one. She's 43 years old and I've always had a fetish for mommys. What should I do guys? I'm trying to keep my chest pains under control before the date so I don't panic. I have my meds and they're helping but I've never been on a date before and don't know what to expect. I really want this one to be the one. Please guys any advice you can give me is valuable. I'll do anything for advice.

[Anonymous No.11610909]

>hi i like crypto
>SO I AUTISMED AT THIS IMAGINARY YOGA CLASS AND S SPECIAL NEEDS TECHER CAME TO CHECK MY BRAIN GUYS AM I DATE HE R NOW?

Kill yourself and delete this thread, this board is a fucking joke.

[Anonymous No.11610937]

>>11610879

[Anonymous No.11610964]

>29 and acting like a teenager calling her "the one" before a first date
Jesus, so this is what inceldom does to the human psyche.
It's probably for the best you have a mom fetish. This lady can pretend to love you for a couple years before stealing all your dough.

[Anonymous No.11610970]

fuck her right in pussy

[Anonymous No.11611509]

This is the only type of shit posting that exists on biz I love it

[Anonymous No.11611516]

>>11610970
>>11610879
IMAGINE THE SMELL

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP

SNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFFFF

[Anonymous No.11611547]

Cool story, bro.

[Anonymous No.11611548]

Why is /biz/ becoming more /r9k/ than /r9k/?

[Anonymous No.11611577]

Ok OP, you need some quality advice and I need some money. What do you think of helping each other?

[Anonymous No.11611581]

>>11611548
r9k is diluted now with normies but only the most autistic posters remain on biz during this bear market

[Anonymous No.11611590]

>>11611548
Many reasons.
I go here and on /fit/
The tfw no gf threads are all over /fit/ too.
Prob because leddit shut down /r/incels. Their numbers are in diaspora now.

[Anonymous No.11611604]

>>11610879
Just try to treat it as if you were eating dinner with a friend, try to ignore the fact that she's a woman and just talk to her and see what she does for fun, what her life is like, et cetera. Don't mention your money.

[Anonymous No.11611611]

>>11610879
going to a yoga class does sound like a good idea OP
don't talk about money but offer to pay for drinks or whatever
if you mention your wealth you just diminished your good gesture and opened yourself up to predatory behavior
don't mention ethereum either because that's even more autistic

be friendly, create a semi-lie that you're a consultant or IT or something in the tech industry, DO NOT MENTION CRYPTO

[Anonymous No.11611621]

>>11610879
triple dose anxiety pills before date

[Anonymous No.11611641]

>>11610879
Just remember that you're out of her league. She'd be blessed to have someone like you. Whatever deficiencies are making you a nervous wreck aren't that big a deal. She's definitely not the one, though. 29 isn't that old. Just put yourself out there more and rub one out before the next yoga class

[Anonymous No.11611662]

>>11610879
ask her if you can smell her feet

[Anonymous No.11611681]

Quality advice in this thread.

Don't stress out too much, older women are usually way more considerate, no need to bullshit your way through the date. She will probably be as nervous as you are.

[Anonymous No.11611738]

>>11610879
This story is real and completely true.

[Anonymous No.11612007]

I think this thread highlights the highs and lows of the crypto market. It's a metaphor symbolizing how we as future lambo-owners take our first steps, full of enthusiasm and expectations buy a coin just to find out it's as loose as a 60 year old boomer.

We can liken the feelings of excitement and later panic as he realized that the sweaty shitcoin was going nowhere, to the feeling of FUD and FOMO. Seeing all the potential, expectations, hopes and dreams go down the drain in an instant, all the way to the hospital bed (He fell for the hodl meme).

However, as he starts to realize that he's still alive at the bottom, the glimmer of hope returns as he finally finds the true path to the moon. The holders path.

[Anonymous No.11612271]

>>11610879
>bought ethereum
stopped reading here

[Anonymous No.11612298]

>>11612007
Is this a new strangely on point pasta?

[Anonymous No.11612303]

>>11610879
Why the fuck do you post it on /biz/?

Oh right
>bought ethereum at $6
Who care

[Anonymous No.11612318]

Where you at OP? I'll call the ambulance for 7.00 pm just in case.

[Anonymous No.11612331]

>he fell for the "women are people" meme