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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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11544189 No.11544189 [Reply] [Original]

>"okay anon, as part of the interview process we'd like you to present for ten minutes on why you feel your personality makes you the perfect cultural fit for our company"
>"start whenever you're ready"

>> No.11544201

>I fap to traps and trade meme coins. I bet none of you know what blockchain is!
>Anon, I know what is bitcorn
>I know about blockchain too!
>Does dogecoin count?

>AAAAAAAAAAAAA late adopter

>> No.11544204

>>11544189
Orange man bad. Women are powerful.
*sit back down for 9 minutes 40 seconds*

>> No.11544209

>>11544204
this, unironically

>> No.11544221

>>11544189
Well let me start first with saying

Thank you for inviting me!

Well I think I'm a perfect cultural fit because I really value the diversity goals of your company.


Well why? Because diversity is what allowing us to see things from a different perspectives.

Since I'm a minority myself (1,5% Indian according a DNA test I bought online ) , I think I would be a perfect fit.

>> No.11544263

>>11544201
>ok well I bet you don't know what a trap is!

>> No.11544277

any job that doesnt value you based on your competence is not a job worth having

you're no different than a prostitute at point

>> No.11544292

This looks like a legitimate hazing ritual. Instead of physical-based humiliation, a purely psychological one is delivered.

>> No.11544304

>>11544277
A prostitute serves clients, not coworkers.

>> No.11544306

>>11544189

Hi guys!

I think my personality would be a perfect fit because I am a diagnosed multi-personality sociopath who can blend in with NPCs like yourselves, gain your trust, pacify you in your humdrum daily chitchat, all the while slowly wresting control of the company from the board until I eventually leverage myself into a position of total control of the company, firing you all, stripping its assets for personal gain and moving on to my next target.

>> No.11544318
File: 3.55 MB, 600x338, 1540252693215.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11544318

>>11544189
*ahem*
FFFFUUUUCK DRUMPF!
*everyone applauds*
>you're hired

>> No.11544337

>>11544189
57 KB PNG
>straight khv, need money to pay for college
>make account on grindr, upload shirtless photo (without face) and say I'm looking for "generous" guys on my profile
>50 y/o guy sends me dick pic and face pic, offers to pay 200 euro
>tell him I don't have any experience and don't want to do anal
>says we can just kiss and do oral
>go to his house, nervous as fuck, he starts to take his clothes off and I do the same
>he asks if we can kiss, I say I don't want to, but I let him kiss my chest
>asks me to suck him off, which I do for ten minute until he cums
>then he sucks me off and I cum after a few minutes
>after he asks me regular questions like what I'm studying, where I live, etc.
>I go home and feel like shit
>he wants to meet again

>> No.11544538

>immediately remove pants
>with one deft movement I cup my left hand, start masturbating with my right while getting into a squat
>void my bowels onto the floor whilst ejaculating into my left hand
>leap from the squat and dive towards the highest ranked male in the room
>rub my semen into his hair and face to establish dominance
>become the leader

>> No.11545170

Growing up jewish.....

>> No.11545197

>>11544337
You arent khv or straight. You sucked each other dicks, you are gay fren.

>> No.11545207

>>11544189
>no. thanks for the interview, goodbye.

>> No.11545217

>>11544337
second use of new pasta

>> No.11545230

>>11544318
kek d really hard

>> No.11545476

>>11544277
prostitutes can be valued based on their competence.

>> No.11545513

>>11544221
Fucking ranjeet