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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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10121065 No.10121065 [Reply] [Original]

Can we have a thread about lying on your resume? I know you fuckers aren't honest.

Personally im tired of my horribly paid wagey job. I'm thinking about lying about having a degree and trying to get into an entry level position but I need some advice

>> No.10121082

>>10121065
dude lie your ass off

>> No.10121084

>>10121065
NEVER lie about having a degree ffs, unless you want to have legal trouble. You can fluff your resume pretty easily with volunteer work and experience unless you were playing games all these years, there is a good chance you have something to show for.

>> No.10121097

>>10121065
didnt even have to lie on my resume i got a job from a college alum lol barely do work at all

>> No.10121118

>>10121065
IF you have to make a thread about it clearly you aren't smart or ballsy enough to pull it off yourself. Any degree that you can lie about having won't get you anywhere anyway unless you're black.

>> No.10121134

>>10121084
How? I've never heard of them verifying a degree.

>> No.10121161

>>10121134
Dunno where you are from, but they always checked my background... Every damn time.

>> No.10121200

>>10121161
Im in Canada. I have never heard of them calling the university or asking to see the framed degree but maybe I just dont know that many people

>> No.10121206

lmao every company worth their shit outsource their background process to companies that look at everything they can find with your name on it, including education.
youre not getting away with lying about about something as massive as a degree

I lied about my experience at school, said I was chosen to work on their hardware when in reality it was just a lab in a hands on class. No way to verify that unless you actually spend the time to call up the uni and nobody has time for that shit, especially HR looking at 50+ resumes.

>> No.10121247

>>10121200
They do make a background check if the company has a competent HR department.

>>10121206
This

>> No.10121260

>>10121065
You should've stayed in school you dumbfuck. Now look at ya.

>> No.10121275

>>10121247
What if its a smaller company and an entry level job?

Honestly ive asked EVERY single person I know with an education if they ever needed to provide proof of their degree and they said no. So unless they're calling the school and asking...

Also there's news stories about nurses, doctors, big company executives who've lied on their resume. So how thorough could it really be if CEOs have been caught lying about education(after working there for a while).

>> No.10121358

>>10121275
They were news stories because people found out... They will check you, you won't know it.
Entry level, it really depends on which field, but cmon OP, go study and take that degree or start a business or some sort proof of work to complement your resume, you are pushing yourself to failure if you try a shit like that.

>> No.10121441

>>10121358
Well I mean if some guy can lie on his resume to get a job as a CEO of a fortune 500 company (where you'd assume background checks would be the strictest of all) and work there for a while then surely me lying about some general crap degree to get a basic entry level job at a small to mid sized company shouldn't be unrealistic.

I will probably get a degree eventually but my idea was getting a couple years of exp by lying then just progressing off that gained experience.

>> No.10121499

>>10121441
This being something rare on 4chan, being totally honest with you, try to start your own venture if you want credibility and exp, do NOT lie about a degree, you will get massively fucked, we are in a era where an individual information is really easy to get

>> No.10121541

>>10121065

Don't lie.

Get a degree if you think it's necessary to get a better job.

Duh.

>> No.10121585

>>10121499
I don't believe you. Feels like everyone's lying these days.

>> No.10121601

>>10121585
Kek, ok then... i'm starting to understand why you don't have a degree

>> No.10121665

>>10121441
>if some guy can lie on his resume to get a job as a CEO of a fortune 500 company (where you'd assume background checks would be the strictest of all)
This is one of those things where it is backwards from what you think; people who are at that level are often taken at their word no questions asked and they got the job more through personal contacts, and the BS they get caught for is honestly just needless, arrogant resume padding.
There is a lot you can bullshit on your resume but you are better off stretching the truth rather than outright fabricating it.

>> No.10121673

>>10121601
you're literally telling me "dont lie, they'll somehow magically find out". Maybe you're explaining it wrong but id be a fool to believe something with no explanation.

>> No.10121724

>>10121673
Because lies sooner or later will get you in trouble ffs, it's like I'm teaching a 3-year-old. Do you not understand that lying something like that would get you in a position far worse than what you had before, you wouldn't even go to work with a piece of mind. The risk / benefit ratio is not fucking worth it.

>> No.10121755

>>10121724
If they dont catch it immediately then what will happen? No one will randomly check my education years into a career.

Honestly what will happen? there's no "lying blacklist" visible to every company.

>> No.10121784

>>10121673
Quit being a stupid petulant fuck and listen to >>10121499 he is actually giving good advice.
Colleges and university have departments dedicated to handling alumni affairs and any business you are likely to apply to will conduct or hire another firm to conduct a cursory background check involving either googling your name or contacting the school you claim to have gone to.
There is a lot you can sham or massage into your resume but degrees are easily provable or disprovable, will annihilate your reputation at that company if you get caught before you are hired or, if you get hired, anyone finds out later on.
Not worth it. Git gud at a skill and use that as a basis for a career. Meet people, prove yourself competent to them and get their help in starting a career. Bullshitting about a degree is not going to solve your problems and only introduce you to new ones.

>> No.10121785

>>10121755
I give up, you are an idiot if you don't see the repercussions of this.

>> No.10121816

>>10121784
How about lying about a 2 year diploma? I can understand maybe a big and prestigious firm would check but a small company seems unlikely.

>>10121785
You arent able to give solid reasoning. You are just trying to scare me by being vague.

>> No.10121848

>>10121065
My friend was a fake reference for his friend. He was LARPing as a Sargent and needed a fake subordinate to vouch for him. He got the job.
Ironically enough it was an HR position. I think he still works there

>> No.10121852

>>10121785
>get fired from a job you were unqualified for

they can't take back the money they paid you

are you a retard anon?

you must be a hard working 30 y/o boomer with strong morals

>> No.10121886

>>10121852
Exactly my thinking. Literally the worst case scenario possible is I'm RIGHT BACK where I started.

Seems like a nobrainer.

>> No.10121893

>>10121816
>op: hey guys I'm going to lie about going to college what advice do you have?
>anon: don't
>op: why
>anon: it's easy to catch
>op: how
>anon: (describes how)
>op: ok but how
It seems you are going to do it anyway so good luck.
I will just leave you with the advice again that you can massage or exaggerate the truth but outright lying will generally fuck you over unless you can do it in such a way you don't get caught.
You sound like you are trying to do something that is going to get you caught.

>> No.10121910

do not lie about having a degree, that is a stupid decision, as other anons are trying to warn you

>> No.10121931

>>10121084
this is not illegal you retard

>> No.10121936

it's easy just fake a degree from a bumfuck nowhere university in asia or africa or something like that.
They won't be able to backtrack that

>> No.10121942

>>10121893
Look man ive thought this all out. Mostly what I was looking for was other peoples suggestions from their personal experience. I got good ideas from biz before that got me my current job. (Said I worked for a company that went bankrupt so they couldn't check reference)

>> No.10121954

>>10121936
This makes sense. I heard a lot of immigrants lie about their education since no ones calling a university in the Philippines or some shit to confirm.

>> No.10121979

>>10121954
also gives you the advantage of having experience in other countries and stuff

>> No.10121991

>>10121979
normies love that multi cultural shit

>> No.10122013

>>10121065

I lied during my college interview and got it. I answered all their questions, smiled, made constant eye contact, and I got in a shitty state university.

How do you get a job? Don't lie. You need to make sure you can prove your skills on the job. If the lie is within your capabilities, then go for it. That's what everyone in this thread will neglect to tell you. If you can't sleep at night after lying about something you know you can't do, you shouldn't lie.

>> No.10122015

>>10121852
This is the usual advice from 4chan. Ad hominem to justify a bad decision. No, I'm not a boomer but I know enough to understand the risk, it's not about risk it's about not getting fucked.

>> No.10122018

>>10121979
For that it'd probably be tough though since it would bring more attention and raise more questions.

At this point I'm thinking just general degree at a lowtier school with a mediocre GPA to seem nothing out of the ordinary.

>> No.10122035

>>10122015
correction: it's not about *morals*

>> No.10122048

>>10121931
It is in some countries. Idiot. Having a fake degree does give prison, depending on the circumstances in some countries.

>> No.10122066

>>10121441
>CEO
>Most strict background checks
You are as innocent as a little baby.

>> No.10122068

>>10122013
Man i could do all these bullshit jobs that require a degree. What, I need to watch a youtube video to figure out how to use their shit software?

>> No.10122089

>>10121499
this

I had a startup with a friend who couldnt find a job. He used the experience to get 120k a year while abandoning the startup. Oh well.

>> No.10122105

>>10122015
>keeps talking about getting fucked
>doesn't say how you can get fucked

oh no i cant work at the company I was unqualified to work at anymore

how terrible

>> No.10122137

>>10122048
i dont think op is trying to be a fake lawyer or doctor

>> No.10122160

>>10122105
>work at a company for two years before you get caught
>"oh well they can't take the money back lol and I got experience"
>apply elsewhere for a job
>"gee anon can you explain this two year gap in your work history? Where did you get the two years experience managing databases/mollifying disgruntled customers/masturbating horses?"

>> No.10122193

>>10122137
Lying about exp is a thing, you can do that, if you pass the HR tests, be my guest, but believe me, knowing about the veracity of a degree is only a distance of a phone call. You can get fined, and jailed. Engineering for example is also applied. I do know it is possible to fool HR with a fake degree, but what you are failing to see is that the risk IS NOT worth the reward. Jeez, since when did this board get this dense.

>> No.10122194

>>10122160
I'm already a shit tier wageslave. there's nowhere to go but up from here.

>>work at a company for two years before you get caught
HOW? What fuckinh company checks your references years after you got hired. thats fucking retarded with a .01% chance.

>>"oh well they can't take the money back lol and I got experience"

Yeah I have it now
>>apply elsewhere for a job
>>"gee anon can you explain this two year gap in your work history? Where did you get the two years experience managing databases/mollifying disgruntled customers/masturbating horses?"

"I worked at the company I lied for. Here's Mr. shekelburg's number he was my supervisor."

That doesn't work? Im back to where I currently am. No loss at all.

>> No.10122199

>>10121724
>lie to get job
>save a few hundred k
>put it into bitcoin
>by the time they find out you become a deca millionaire

not a bad idea bub.

>> No.10122231

>>10122160
>get paid 2 years way above your pay grade
>unironically get 2 years of experience
>apply to new job using last job and put your friend as reference
>apply to new job using another fake job as reference, now with experience to back it up

hurr durr

poor uni cucks having to justify their sheeple decisions

>> No.10122252

>>10122231
This Lmao. These boomers either lied themselves and don't want their scam saturated or are unicucks

>> No.10122268

>>10121954
yikes. my parents are immigrants. This isn't worth your effort. Every employer they dealt with told them they didn't give a fuck about their degree since it was not a U.S. degree (if they were european or maybe from a top tier asian university they'd care... but if you're lying about a literal who degree bets are off).

They had to redo their education in the U.S. or work menial jobs before they could find better work.

>> No.10122295

>>10122252
asks for opinions, already has his opinion formed. Congrats, "boomer"

>> No.10122335

>>10122295
Was looking for people who could substantiate their opinion with personal experiences or logic. Not just parrot some boomer crap

>> No.10122408

OP, if you're still in this thread, don't lie about a degree. I'm canadian as well and every job I'm had they verified my degree through backcheck. Unless you're applying for a mom and pop fucking retail job, ur likely going to get checked. It cost the company $73 to do the check.

Don't be a fucking idiot. Experiences you can lie about of past jobs, just get a fake reference. But degree is the only thing you won't get away with with any reputable company especially in canada.

>> No.10122409

>>10122335
You already have your bias formed idiot, I did "substantiate" by arguments, but you are selectively reading, you immediately agreed to people who said it was a good idea without "substantiating" their arguments. Let me make this brief

> Is it possible to fake a degree? Yes
> Is it possible to get away with it? Yes
> What are my odds of succeeding? Somewhat limited if you get a job on a decent company with good HR
> What happens if I get caught? Depends on your legislation and the contract you did with the company. You might get fined, you might have to compensate the company from the wasted resources they invested in you, and you might be jailed depending on the circumstance
> Is it worth it? In my opinion no
> Is there a solution besides this? Learn a subject, solve a problem, make a business model

Isn't this enough, if you have read it correctly, this is what I said in previous replies.

>> No.10122439

>>10122408
Damn really? How about a 2 year college diploma? What would you suggest in terms of lying about past jobs

>> No.10122464

>>10122409
Fine boomer you may have a point.

How about lying about experience then? For my current job I said I worked a bankrupt company.

>> No.10122689

Bump

>> No.10123025

Biz pls

>> No.10123028

>>10122089
This. Say you founded a startup and it failed. They can't confirm it and it shows drive and gives you experience. Just make sure you have all the details in order.

>> No.10123060

The only good part of my working day is laughing at retarded profile sections on CVs.

t. recruiter and wagecuck.

>> No.10123231

>>10123028
Hmm I think I shall

>> No.10123266

>>10123025
>>10122689
>>10123231


Why not just get the degree legitimately?

>> No.10123298

>>10123266
Not worth years of my time and money

>> No.10123365

>>10123298
It's 3 years m8.....

3 years to on average double your earnings and get viewed as an actual person by a lot of the snobby normalfags

>> No.10123381

>>10123365
4 years + debt. When I could just lie and get the benefits for free.

>> No.10123424

>>10121275
you are correct. You can lie about the degree and nobody will find out. The guy anger posting you either is a shill or deeeply in college debt and is trying to rationalize his debt by lashing out at you. Long story short you can 100% lie about college degree on a resume and most places will not find out
>t. Boss

>> No.10123459

>>10123424
Thank you

>> No.10123504

>>10123459
well, at least I tried

>>10123424
I have 0 debt

>> No.10123505

>>10123381
It's just not worth it.The cost and years wasted is so insignificant compared to what you gain. (assuming you're an amerilard).

>> No.10123545

>>10122231
Employers usually ask for references from companies you've worked at, not from your friends.

>> No.10123594

>>10123505
Im a canadalard. I do plan to get a degree at some point

>> No.10123609

>>10121275
Really depends on the business. Small companies might do it, especially if it's a job where the worker is required to handle sensitive information.

>> No.10123637

>>10121585
this. It’s rule of the jungle not rule of law. As long as you can produce results in line with your peers or better you are unlikely to be found out

>> No.10123661

>>10122193
concern shilling is lame. Most of what you said is false. Sad

>> No.10123665

>>10123637
You are basing on assumptions, I'm basing on facts, the difference here is the fact that you are telling what the OP wants to hear, and I'm telling something opposite.

>> No.10123669

>>10121065
if you had previous jobs, write positive reviews about them on sites where you can rate an employer. Do it around the time you quit or got fired.

Word it genuine and give them like a 4/5 and imply that you left out of your own will if you got fired. For better paid jobs the HR might look up your previous employers and if they see a convinient good rating from someone "anonymous" they will think you are a fair employee who wont complain all the time.

>> No.10123679

>>10123661
Meh, I'm not gonna bite this troll, if you think these are false statements please look at a contract and find one where there isn't any clausure regarding the veracity of the candidate

>> No.10123712

>>10123665
>>10123679
Stop lying to us boomer you just want us to fail

>> No.10123721

>>10123665
you’re spreading FUD and outright falsehoods. You made your case if you are confident you are right that should be enough for you. I think I have more experience than you based on your comments so I am giving an alternative opinion to the guy you were lambasting

>> No.10123722

>>10121816
You are a fucking brainlet. Holy shit. If you want the degree that bad go to fucking school, personally I feel I don't need degrees in this life.

>> No.10123727
File: 13 KB, 300x200, retard.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10123727

>>10123712
Yes that's it you got me

>> No.10123754

>>10123679
boomer confirmed. Stop shilling to young people starting their life you immoral old bastard

>> No.10123755

>>10123721
Manipulation of argument, you gave an alternative opinion while making an ad hominem counter-argument, sheesh, I'm out. I'm wasting time

>> No.10123875

>>10123712
This, don't let him instill fear into you. Just because he's trying to rationalize doing "the right things" doesn't mean there aren't other ways to making it.

>>10123424
Only legit answer in here

>> No.10123892

>>10123755
Pathetic, get out and don't come back.

>> No.10123911

>>10123875
Thank you brother. Do you have any specific advice I should make note of about lying effectively?

>> No.10123934

>>10123892
>>10123875
>>10123754
Ahah what a bunch of rednecks

>> No.10123949

>>10123911
You really have to believe your own lies. Live as if they were real. I had a very hard time getting my first job because I let my morals get in the way, I refused to make shit up on my resume but I swallowed the pill and put a bunch of shitty jobs that I didn't really do. I got the job.
Once you do that you upgrade jobs every couple of years.

>> No.10123997

>>10123949
Okay well im in second stage. I used to be a NEET (worked random part time jobs briefly once in a while). But about a year ago I lied on my resume and got my first fulltime "actual" job.

Problem is I've outgrown it and am tired of the shit wage. I want to get a better one but a higher pay seems to require a degree. Should I just increase my lies as well?

>> No.10124082

I only just skimmed this thread, but when I interned for an HR department at a nonprofit hospital years ago, one of the things I did was background checks on literally every applicant that was selected for an interview. This included a criminal background check (which was paid and done through a government website), contacting universities to verify degrees, and compiling at least 3 references from past employers. This was for positions like nurses, aides, assistants, technicians, cafeteria workers, billings, janitors, etc. (obviously important positions like doctor and administrators are handled differently). So while I'm sure other places don't go through the trouble, it really depends on the employer and how they handled things. Now that I think about it, I never did come across a blatantly falsified resume the entire 3 months I interned there. Honestly though, a company that doesn't do background checks probably isn't worth working for in the first place.

>> No.10124091

>>10123997
First try fluffing, making your job position more important than it really is and saying you had job responsibilities that your boss had but you're confident you can do yourself (even if you have never done them).
I would advice to apply for jobs that you're confident you can do even if you don't meet the requirements (college degree, etc). Requirements nowadays are more like wish lists, not really strict points you have to check (unless they specifically ask for them).
If you still have troubles getting your desired jobs that way, then maybe consider upping your lies.

>> No.10124127

>>10124082
Law, government and medical are the only jobs where you absolutely SHOULDN'T lie.

>> No.10124132
File: 1.12 MB, 720x404, 1519513133447.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10124132

>new guy at work
>manager shoves him into my office to get him up to speed
>start going over the progress we've made in various projects, he's nodding and "uh-huh"ing and shit
>give him a simple task of updating a script and ask for it by the end of the day
>"sure thing"
>end of the day
>nothing is done
>the fuck
>"yeah I don't really get this"
>the fuck
>"I tried googling but all I got was results from some website called stackoverflow"
>leave office while he dicks around and seek out manager
>hey is this a joke
>"what"
>I asked if this is a joke
>??
>who let him in here
>"I did, what's the problem"
>he can't even modify this script without breaking it
>"here are his credentials"
>go over his resume
>masters in computers science, 7+ certifications, github showcase references
>go back into office
>tell him to go over his github work
>"one second"
>see him googling github

Manager kept him on for the rest of the week even though everyone else he was stuck with said the same shit. I with I knew who the fuck was in charge of hiring so I could slap them.

>> No.10124151

>>10121097
Heyhey I know right! Engineer here working for University:D

>> No.10124170

>>10124091
Okay ill probably do that. If not then screw these Jews im lying about everything.

>> No.10124175

>>10121065
I dropped out of high school and got my GED. Then I got a cheap two year certificate from an online program at a major university. I was lazy and it took me four years to actually finish it. On my resume I list the years I started and finished, what the certificate specialized in, and "Graduated with distinction." Recruiters assume it's a four year degree and no one has ever asked me to confirm or deny that it is.

>> No.10124188

>>10124127
Try lying about architecture, civil engineering, mechanical engineering and so on, where you have third-party entities verifying your credentials. What world do you live in?

>> No.10124224

>>10124175
I don't know why, but a lot of high school/ college dropouts have "life smarts" or something where they end up much more successful than people with degrees. Based hustlaz.

>> No.10124241

>>10121936
Fake a degree from Europe. There is basically no way to check.

>> No.10124247

>>10124224
I own a house and have 350K in my normie brokerage accounts, so I've got that going for me.

>> No.10124255

>>10124224
That is possible yes, no one is saying that college students are better... It was never said that on this discussion, actually, I know a bunch of people without degrees having success, the difference here is the fact the OP doesn't have to make an effort, and being successful requires a LOT of effort.

Also the question I was answering is:
> Is it a good idea to fake a degree?
Not
> Does having a degree makes my life better? Does it make me more important?

>> No.10124261

>>10124255
Correction: OP doesn't *want* to make an effort

>> No.10124278

>>10124241
Europe here as well, it is possible to check, every college is obligated to have the student history and can be checked publicly

>> No.10124287

>>10124247
How much in crypto fren?

>> No.10124331

>>10121065
and herein lies the rub. Any Tom, Dick or Abdul can go to university these days the qualifications are already dumbed down enough so these average snowflakes can graduate let alone the pajeets crawling under a rock lying/exaggerating about it. Being a world class chef when in reality a burger flipper does not a chef make. People are wise to these bullshit claims and if they dont initially discover the deceit they deserve all they get.

>> No.10124338

>>10124287
Currently just a few Eth from mining and various shitcoin airdrops.

>> No.10124402

Lie on your resume. Give yourself fake certifications and degrees. If you don’t, you’re putting yourself at a disadvantage to everyone that does

>> No.10124711

Retard alerts. Employers never check your education. CEO of telecom marketing service here for ATT. Only criminal background checks are performed which is about 60 bucks. Education search is seperate and more expensive., at least in sales nobody gives a fuxk

>> No.10124735
File: 1.96 MB, 423x264, 10C89AB8-8667-4F63-A20C-937EADE671AD.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10124735

I legit lied about half my resume, including my gpa and work places. Never got caught, and i work a high end white collar job

>> No.10125145

>>10124711
Thanks bro

>> No.10125563

>>10122193
engineering is not applied.


I work as an mechanical engineer and have no degree. I was upfront about not having a degree but demonstrated I had the skills (especially in cad).
It's only fraud if you say you have you Professional Engineering license (the think that allows you to stamp your name on bridges and other dangerous shit).

>> No.10125641

>>10124132
>linking someone else’s github as his own

That takes some serious chutzpah.

>> No.10126082

Another bump

>> No.10126503

>>10124132

we had a guy that was supposedly a PHD in computer science write a basic parsing and character replacing script entirely in SQL because thats the only language he knew. it took pages of code to do what could be done in python in 10 minutes

>> No.10126581 [DELETED] 
File: 391 KB, 1080x2160, IMG_20180703_013959.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10126581

You know what to do biz, dont forget to record.
Anyone have the audioclips from the last thread? Looking for the guy who tried to sell him hammocks

>> No.10126607

>>10126503
SQL has a regular replace function and I'm sure it didn't take several pages for him to write it
https://www.w3schools.com/sql/func_sqlserver_replace.asp

But yeah I guess you read that Python was a good language and think SQL is a bad one, so you just echo some shit like that

>> No.10126617

>>10121065
If I lied about my background when getting this job I'd be so fucked. Even with a good education in the field, I'm still under qualified. You are setting yourself up for anguish if you are going to go down this path. Pick up a trade, drive trucks, go to school, teach yourself programming, do anything but lie.

>> No.10126719

Life is short OP
Do it
I did it and it worked well

>> No.10126763
File: 17 KB, 179x282, DB197027-7F80-45C0-ACA2-8CC43785B57D.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10126763

>>10126617
t. Debt riddled faggot justifying his schooling