/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>55127564
serves you right you sick fuck

>>55127564
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>>55127564
post the warning or gtfo this can't be real

>>55127564
You fucking idiot, it's a hint that your dedicated HR invites you to have lunch together.

>>55127643
tfw no femdom HR gf

>>55127643
The hr is a dude

>>55127564
If lunch is unpaid that's illegal as you need to be duty free during the time. Being forced to socialize, take calls, run errands etc means you're entitled to pay for the time.

>>55127564
>>55127570
>>55127572
>>55127633
>>55127643
>>55127661
>>55127671

>tfw head of HR sent me an email saying I need to up my facebook friends count

>I have little under 100 friends on there, most from highschool stil that I havent seen in ages but she says it makes me not look like a team player

>>55127680
It’s unpaid

But they said eating lunch alone demonstrates a lack of adherence to [company’s] core values of collaboration and respect, something along those lines.

>>55127696
so go eat lunch with the crew, but make it raw yellow onions, that swedish stinkfish, and the smelliest european cheese your grocery store offers. For bonus points burn a bag of microwave popcorn every day too.

>>55127661
A

>>55127564
I only ever got one bitchy email from HR in my career. It was about my habit of routinely arriving to the office 30 minutes late when every other manager would arrive 1 hour late. I responded "cool fire me" and they wrote back apologizing and I never heard about it again.

>>55127564
I filled out a company retention bullshit questionnaire and I literally put my name there in purpose and called out my HR manager for being a worthless faggot that he is lmao I don't understand why they won't fire me its been 3 months and they're pressuring my boss to make to do extra bullshit and I went off on him, I got sent home 4 hours early that night and after that they won't bother me anymore. I've been working almost 4 years for this place and a total of 8 years for my total career. I honestly kinda regret not doing this before I quit my other 3 jobs before this one. They literally have no power over you

>>55127696
And that's illegal, tell them to pay you for your breaks if they want to enforce company policy on you during them.

>>55128814
the manager at one my jobs sued the company over this kind of issue. the owners would call him during lunch to talk business and even reprimanded him a few times for not sending reports until after he clocked back in. he kept track for about two years and the lawyers got him a year's pay in compensation

>>55127682
Like in sims 2 when you need friend to get promotion. Anyway just add colleagues from work

>>55127696
listen to these guys
>>55128814
>>55128869
I would say start documenting things by sending them to your personal email
don't change for awhile. Once you get all the dominos lined up become more anti social.
especially to HR
when you feel they are getting frustrated file a harassment claim against EVERY employee in the HR department.
Harrasment is not exactly right, do some googling.
but if you can have a somewhat valid claim on everyone in HR (sounds like your company is small)
then there is nothing they can and will do
you have to play their petty game because the global homo government is on the side of who plays the gayest game wins

>>55127811
check'd and pretty based.
the only problem though, you will never be able to be promoted internally.
whenever you feel like you've earned a promo, you'll have to go to market and switch companies.
and then you have to buck brake the new manager all over.

>>55127564
>oh no the people I work with and see everyday want to actually talk to me and know me as a person instead of me being an antisocial autist.

this is truly like that book 1969. Seriously, how hard is it to be normal?

>>55128814
This correct. I would send an email (make sure it’s in writing) to let them know you will need to be payed if you’re expected to be in a particular place for lunch, as you are no longer duty free. When they fire you, sue. They’re going to fire you anyway, so you may as well get a few bucks out of it.

>>55127564
That means HR wants you to go to their place for lunch and "second lunch". I sure hope you know how to toss salad, OP.

>>55127564
Who the hell even works anymore?

>>55129759
>how hard is it to be normal?
pretty hard desu

>>55127564
make it your mission to have lunch with the HR loser every single day that sent you that warning

>>55127633
if it sounds too retarded it is not real. if it was you should just quit the job and when the question inevitably comes up in the interview for your next job explain why you quit. only thing hr cares about is that there are no conflicts between employees. well, that and squeezing more profit out of employees.

>>55127564
Reminds me of high school. I HAD to eat with somebody, or people would think I was upset and would walk over and ask me if I was okay.

>>55127682
>>55127564
NEET here. Stories like this make me consider working construction. How do you cope psychologically?

>>55131147
I never did, one day i dumped everything I had into crypto and now i am living off my stack as a fellow NEET

>>55129759
>know me as a person
I have no interest in hearing about my coworkers kids/vacations/what they watched on Netflix last week, and they have no interest in my gay nerdy hobbies.

>>55131255
Checked, this is me.

Test

>>55127696
Tell them they have social anxiety disorder/disability and they are discriminating against your disability by not allowing you do eat alone and you will sue them for it.

>>55127564
>hold presentation
>meeting recorded
>ok, let me show you guys one more thing
>open browser, porn visible
>thanks for the great presentation
Simple as.

>>55127564
Grim story Anon, unironically sounds like a cultural fit problem
Consider looking for a job with more autists

>>55127706
I hear Durian fruit is nice.

Make your Facebook look like you have 1000x friends by accepting every jeet. Only post shit normies care about, and go and eat “out” during lunch. Really just eat in your car. This is how we break the normies my frens, we pretend to live the life they desire, but don’t invite them. Ironically, we don’t want or desire that life, but I assure (you) the despair on their face when they’re not welcome to our rock climbing and lunch at Darcey’s it’s soul crushing.

>>55127564
should've been fired on the spot incel indentified

>>55129759
lol I do this during work hours, at lunch I want to be left alone.

>>55127564
I used to work in an office filled with women, and during lunch of course theyd gossip and talk about dumb shit. They said I was being anti social because I would eat and read a book outside under a tree lol, fucking losers

>>55127564
lol holy shit how is that actually company policy.

usually eating lunch alone would be the one refreshing respite at the job. Situations where you can't it just fucking sucks man. I just want to enjoy some time alone and read some stuff on my phone or whatever.

>>55131147
If you are an introvert nerdy type it will fucking suck and be draining being around a bunch of meat heads all day. You might enjoy the first 6 months or so though, testing your manliness a bit or whatever the fuck. It's pretty miserable and not worth how much it takes out of you. There are way better lower effort positions that pay better as well

>>55131147
It’s a larp that would never happen

>boss tipped me off that the higher ups are watching people like hawks now because we work hybrid and people aren't coming in
>I Used to be able to show up 3x a week an leave to go to the gym for lunch and then go home but I can't now because the retarded lower level employees abused it

I've had enough

>>55129759
i dont want to be friends with coworkers. i dont want coworkers to know any more about me than they need. the more they know about me, the more they might feel comfortable about me. it's like feeding a stray cat.
i may be autistic.

>>55127811
>they literally have no power over you

if they arent firing you for that shit it probably means its a trash company and they cant find a willing replacement.

>>55129759
this. my coworkers were chill and nice in every job I had. They really made the day go smooth. The worst people on earth were HR, management, any corporat fuck. Bunch of NPCs

>>55127564
This actually doesn't happen. You could sue them for harassment, nice shitpost kek

I feel OPs pain. I received a PIP once from the Head of HR that included the fact that I skipped a virtual team lunch (I was a remote employee),

I was making 200k at that company but despite the high salary I left shortly after receiving the PIP. The head of HR was a psycho FTM tranny. I wish this was a LARP but unfortunately it is not.. I fucking hate Silicon Valley,

>>55127564
Don’t take a lunch at all so you can leave early!

>>55127564
You are not special, you are not interesting, you are just as boring and brainwashed as "NPCs"

>>55127682
Haven’t they figured out yet that this is the cause of active shooters in the workplace.

>>55127564

>>55129759
>Seriously, how hard is it to be normal?
It's not hard but it is miserable.

Why are u all waging? This is a neet make it board. Are u all new?

>>55127564
>don't eat lunch with co workers
>don't hang out with co workers outside of work
>only talk to co workers when necessary
>work remote since the coof so that rarely means anyone outside my product team
>almost never mention anything that isn't work related
>show up to the Christmas party every other year or so for the free booze and food
And yet somehow I never have these problems. Probably helps that I am a normal married guy with kids and regular friends. I just have zero interest in being friends with people at work. Maybe try not being a creepy weirdo.

>>55127564
ask everyone in the HR dept to print out the formal warning, in triplicate, all of them must sign, time, and date it, ask for other employees to be witnesses. ask for copies of all correspondence to be made available to you, also signed by everyone in HR.

make them think they are going to get a lawsuit and they'll back right off