/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>54818933
normies just cant handle a little bit of banter, you didnt do anything wrong OP your boss is a NPC

>>54818933
Autism

>>54818968
This
I never really make jokes or anything at work anymore. Just not worth it

>>54818975
Clearly this, only an artist would think that faking someone's death (even just joking about it) is socially acceptable in any way, then come to 4chan to plead his case about not being in the wrong.

>>54818968
If you work in construction you have to have banter though or you get steamrolled.

t.steamrolled because couldn’t handle the banter of construction niggers

>>54818933
No anon it's really funny bravo :D

>>54818933
You're an actual fucking idiot. That is a very dumb thing to say and joke about to a fucking customer.
Yeah, you deserve to get fired. Your boss sounds fucking based.
Die in a fire, nigger

>>54818933
no anon, thats not funny
glad you got fired
>I went to check into a hotel for work once
>the hotel room was paid by the company
>The wagie behind the desk was a funny man like you
>He told me they gave my room away and I have to pay myself.
>oh wait nevermind hahaha joking here you go
>you thinks thats funny hahah just you wait
>call the company
>funny man did that to everyone checking in with my company
>company threatens to move business to another hotel next time
>funny man wagie gets fired
better get real funny, funny man so you dont need a day job

>>54818933
Lmao you fucking retard

>>54818933
Kek, I did something similar when I was younger in one of my jobs
>put in two weeks
>coworker asks why
>told him I had cancer
>really didn't
>don't even know why I said that
>he was stunned
>told him I didn't right after
>no idea what was even happening anymore
wtf

>>54818933
it amazes me how stupid some people are in life. at no point did you brain go this is a bad idea to jok about. nope you just hit the gas and sped forward full tilt. hilarious the level of stupid some people are and than you come online and bitch about it and go I DID NOTHING WRONG! l o l if you cant grasp the concept of dont say tard 4chan shit or make 4chan jokes at your job you deserve to be broke and poor

>>54818933
That actually is funny tho. But your boss is probably just mad cus the customer got mad. Nothing you can really do, its best to just not fuck with customers at all for that reason. Your boss is dumb fuck for firing someone over something stupid like that. Make sure you collect unemployment.

>>54818933
Based. Your boss has no sense of humor

>>54819057
kek
my sides

>>54818933
Nick...gur

>>54818933
Youre retarded, dont joke with customers unless you know them for years and even then this joke would have been borderline

>>54818933
You didn't do anything wrong. The colleague probably hates the needy/lonely customer anyways. Your boss committed wrongful termination. You should get three strikes if you are just a delivery mule.

>>54819197
yeah firing makes no sense. just say don't joke with customers they might not now you are joking. problem solved. It only makes sense if OP already fucked up a bunch already.

>>54818933
Sumfink tells me there is more to that story.

>>54818975
spbp

Social interaction gone wrong. Many such cases in the world of autism.

>>54818968
This.

OP, you may have lost your job but you haven't lost the light within.

>>54818933
>I explain that I thought it would be funny if they thought he was died and then the next week he would show up like nothing has happened
You deserve getting fired.

>>54818933
You're a fucking moron. It isn't about whether it was funny, right, or wrong. Just the cognitive machinery that must be working by default in your head that would lead you to chain of thinking that got you to do what you did would make me not only fire you, but if possible, flag you to be euthanized.

>>54818933
You're the type who thinks pranks on his girlfriend are a good idea and then wonder she gets mad at you afterwards.

>it was just a prank

Your life isn't a fucking Jackass skit, you moron.

>>54819272
>flag you to be euthanized
JEJ

>>54818975
Nah I'm a diver who does inspection/construction underwater and the public always like to ask what we're doing. The standard answer is "recovering the body of a young girl"

>>54818933
Kek, you're a fucking idiot only do shit like that if you really know the company.

>>54818933
For whatever reason you haven't obtained the rudimentary social knowledge needed to navigate the adult world. You fucked up twice: in telling your "joke", and in explaining it to your boss. You could have saved your job by saying you genuinely thought he died due to a misunderstanding, and apologizing for the confusion. You may have an innate defect in social cognition.

>>54818933
chud


lmfao at this point i honesty browse 4chan to feel better about myself because some of you are legit retards

i've said so much fucked up things on jobsites and have never been fired for it..
i have also been told many fucked up things.
and it never effected any work. or "feelings"
no matter the race.
but we're all men.. so.

>>54818933
Kek, I would laugh if I was your boss
I don't know why people here are upset over this

the porta shitter walls on most big construction sites are pretty much 4chin paul.

i swear construction site porta shitter walls and sharpies are the modern soap box of the white mans speech.

>>54819219
there is lol, if OP was dumb enough to do this, then im sure it wasnt the first time he was retarded on the job. probably was on thin ice for a while.

>>54818933
>>Delivery driver
get the fuck off /biz/ wagecuck

>>54818975
>>54819018
>>54819044
>>54819053
>>54819078
>>54819098
>>54819138
>>54819220
>>54819259
>>54819272
>>54819275
>>54819371
>>54819384
These are literal NPCs. Look at the ridiculous misplaced rage in some of these replies, what a bunch of faggot friendless losers. No, your fellow LGBT progressive purity-enforcers and internet connections don’t count as friends.
>>>reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets
And seriously fucking stay there

>>54818933
that is pretty funny, but do not expect NPCs (the customers) or the plebs in denial (your boss) to have a sense of humor because in their world they are 100% serious business professional even if they are broke working 60+ hours a week in an entry level/ foreman type job.

As far as I am concerned the worst part about working these shit jobs is the fact that you have to wear a mask and give a courtesy laugh to the most unfunny milquetoast vanilla repetitive jokes while an actual good joke will get you fired. It is why these shit jobs are soul graters. It is why anyone enterprising that was not born blessed with connections has to turn to crime, and the problem will get worse until the boomers are dead.

inb4 boomer conservatards whine about professionalism and customer service

find something better. great if you can wait tables and get tips

>>54819459
>play unfunny pranks on friends
>keep friends

Pick one.

>>54818933
>>I get brain freeze and do not know how to handle situation
You could have said sorry boss won't happen again. Instead you act like a fucking idiot and try to explain why it was supposed to be funny when nobody else thought it was funny. Get checked for autism ASAP.

>>54819459
Nobody is raging. He really deserves what happened to him is all we're saying.

>>54819474
I have tons of friends from different stages of my life and none of them would have ever taken a “X died…lol jk” seriously. That’s why we’re still friends after many years, because of the ability to do such a thing. You don’t understand because all of your relationships are transactional and it shows. Kindly end your worthless existence, non human

>>54819472
I found it funny and I have more friends and have fucked more women than you. I’m also more handsome, more intelligent and generally more likeable
>>54819486
Notice I said “some,” illiterate NPC

>>54819050
Ball-busting humor can work among colleagues, and from superior to inferior, but not from inferior to superior. The social role of wagies is inferior to that of customers, so the former is always wrong to bust the balls of the latter. It's also a red flag when hiring, by the way. If a job candidate jokes about the interviewer or the company, no matter how lightheartedly, it shows a lack of understanding of social boundaries and hierarchies.

>>54819050
ok boomer. go back to faceberg.

>>54819514
I roasted my current boss on day 3 of the new job at a happy hour and I’m still here 9 months later
You mistake your own social ineptitude and low status for a general state

>>54819486
>>54819474
How does he deserve it? This really didnt harm anyone in any shape or form, and its pretty funny.
>>54818933
You did nothing wrong op. Your boss has no sense of humor.

>>54819497
>>54819538

OP didn't say lol jk though. He let homie believe it was true until he probably reached out to send condolences and then was made to feel like an idiot. You lack empathy for others and it shows.

>>54818933
kek I thought it was funny anon, shame you encountered a joyless person like some in this thread

Autism..

Makes me think about a colleague lawyer(I'm a lawyer).

We're in the court room for the roll call, about 15 lawyers in there, waiting for the judge to enter the court room.

When he enters the room and takes the bench, he trips on the steps and falls down (there's about 3-4 steps for him to get to his bench).

The judge is about 75 years old about to go into retirement. Looks even older than that.

Everyone is holding their breath, hoping he isn't hurt. Thankfully he gets up and he's not hurt.

Then goes my "funny" autist colleague lawyer that says outloud directly to the judge "Ohh, I thought you were joking, are you ok ?"

To this day I still don't know how his autist mind went straight to thinking "that old judge must be joking by tripping on the steps in front of 15 lawyers in a super serious setting"...

Man...

>>54818933
It was funny to me OP, that is all that matters.

>>54819435
it's the difference by people who have been swept up by the system and only live for their job and people who still know there's more to life

if you put on a fake persona or something in work you are torturing your soul, ain't no need for that anons

>>54819523
I didn't say you couldn't joke about your boss in any circumstances. I said a *job candidate* shouldn't joke about the interviewer or the company. When you are at happy hour with your co-workers off the clock, you are in a social setting where boundaries and hierarchies are relaxed. Three days is enough to get to know someone at a basic level in the workplace. You are not a stranger to them anymore.

>>54818933
People don't understand morbid humor. I had a very fucked up childhood/growing up and now I'm a bartender and I joke about death/killing myself/people dying all the time but I always end it with "haha as if" or I literally tell them it is a joke if they take it seriously.
Whole city knows me as a "morbid bartender" and I even got some people to like me for it.
In your situation, you were deadass serious so I understand they fired you, next time if you are using morbid themes as a joke, make sure they get it as a joke...
If you are using that type of humour, make sure you don't take yourself too seriously and make sure people get it as a joke.

>>54818933
yes anon, the part where you fucked up is not calling your boss a honkey/nigger/spick/chink/whatever

>>54819371
>you're so honest it must be a disability
mindbroken

>>54819651
Being unfiltered will not help you get ahead. Successful people understand how other human beings work.

I got got bitched at by management because apparently answering the question "which drink do you recommend" with "the one easiest to make" is the wrong answer

>>54819710
Normies are so desperate to fit in to places where they need to lie to maintain status. Sad.

>>54819645
Morbid humor reflects an underlying genuine morbidity. All those jokes Anthony Bourdain told about the "sweet release of death" were not really jokes.

>>54819739
This is extreme cope. OP in fact did lie and look where it got him.

>>54818933
also the reason the normgroids were offended is because to them their delivery driver is a "friend" even though they only see them when he brings them stuff. It is why customer service is so prized because most people do not have any friends that enjoy their company, they only have transactional friends. They felt like they lost a "friend" and lost face when they told all thier transactional friends he died.

Also lie if a customer takes it the wrong way, I had to work at a quick store for 3 months and every time something wouldnt scan I would hear, it must be free huhuhuh, so I would say I hear that all the time. If that same customer did it again, then I would release the loudest fakest laughter. They would usually shut up after that, but a few would try to tattle on me and of course I denied that I was mocking them and that is my actual laughter. Of course he did not believe me, but couldnt fire me because of my laugh. It helped I never laughed at work because no one said anything funny ever, its weird normies do not laugh cause something is funny, they laugh to foster a sense of group acceptance.

my face when I had to work that shit and the manager would unironically text me if I was excited to come to work today.

>>54819767
If you are funny and approachable, people will get it. If you are autistic and an incel, they will frown. It just comes down to your social skills.
I'm a goth so people expect it

>>54819774
A joke is not a lie, anon

>>54819817
OP never explained it was a joke, anon.

Here's a funny joke for you OP
YOU'RE GETTING PROMOTED
>jk you're firedddd hahaha don't trip on the way out

>>54819486
>>54818975
>>54819018
>>54819044
>>54819053
>>54819078
>>54819098
>>54819138
>>54819220
>>54819259
>>54819272
>>54819275
>>54819371
>>54819384
Stop getting uppity, god damn, you fucking wagies disgust me. Wheres the wagie hate thread when you need it, you wagies need to learn your place in this world: bottom of the totem pole.

>>54819836
He got to explain it to the boss

i can guarantee op didn't get fired for this boss just used it as an excuse to get rid of him.

>>54819815
I didn't deny that morbidly humorous people can be quite charming. Just that they're hurting inside.

>>54819557
why is it the idiots that are most butthurt when they do something idiotic? You would think they would be used to it by now. Same thing happened to me, I would just laugh at think, lol he got me pretty good. Lack of empathy does not mean being an oversensitive faggot, its more of an ego problem on the person on the receiving end of hthe joke.

>>54819866
Who fired him for telling a lie to a customer. It doesn't matter how funny it was or wasn't. The perception to the customer is he was falsely lead to believe someone he interacted with frequently died. Just lmfao if you can't see the distinction here.

>>54819892
Normal people feel bad when someone they know and are friendly with dies. So OP unnecessarily caused a customer to feel pain for the sake of a "prank". He doesn't know them like that.

>>54819918
He was fired for telling a bad joke to a customer. He was honest when explaining to his boss and did not lie about the nature of what was said. You are a typical npc snake who will lie to maintain normie status

>>54819891
I am, for example, but who cares.
Just live your life, make the best of it.

>>54819710
you make a great point, but what about the people stuck in these soul grating jobs? It does psychological damage to be a whipping boy for the customer full time and it is one of the reasons people turn to drugs to cope.

>>54819946
Lmfao that you can't envision a scenario where a customer would be upset at a vendor over hearing false information. Customer could have taken this "news" personally or extremely hard for all you know. How do you not drown in the shower, seriously?

>>54819991
>Customer could have taken this "news" personally or extremely hard for all you know
That would make it even funnier. It's a delivery driver, this is the equivalent of twitch viewers thinking the streamers are their friends

>>54819940
I guess normies didnt get the memo that we only have surrogate communities now since we have become interchangable economic units.

>>54819978
Such customer-facing wagie jobs can be soul-crushing to those with higher intellectual aspirations. That's why they spend the first 20 years of their life trying to succeed academically, because the alternative is bleak. The situation for low-level wagies is bad and getting worse every day, unfortunately.

>>54818933
Who are you? Tom Sawyer? Who even jokes like that? Although is funny, is also retarded as fuck. People are just too retarded to understand, lest laugh about a retarded "joke" like that

>>54820049
Yes, purposely telling your customers false information is great business tactics you can only learn on /biz/.

>equivalent of twitch viewers thinking the streamers are their friends

Customer literally sees the delivery driver every day irl if he's a business and you're comparing it to some internet faggotry. Typical. It is beyond apparent you have the mind equivalent to a middle schooler.

>>54818933
>>I explain to him it was a joke
Kek. You're fucking retarded. You don't joke about shit like that at work, retard. You got what you deserve.
>mfw the new driver tells people on your route that you died

>>54820138
Don't you have hand written christmas cards to the entire USPS staff to get started on? Normies amaze me

>>54818933
>I try to explain to him that it would have been worse if he had actually died but I would tell customers nothing is wrong with him and they learn about it later
Where did you get idea that it would be funny?life,this isn't a sitcom where everything is scripted so everyone knows everything

>>54818933
damn im glad im not this socially retarded.

>>54820154
>Normies amaze me

I'm not at all surprised you're one of those navel gazing faggots who thinks they have it all figured out at the ripe age of 23 and that you're above everyone who isn't yourself. Main character syndrome in the worst fucking screenplay. Enjoy the shitty rest of your existence not knowing how to interact with people.

>>54820154
>Normies amaze me
Clearly. You may be a legit psychopath and not just an autist.

>>54820143
>jobs are serious business
cuck.

>>54820205
>>54820201
You were supposed to learn to be honest from Office Space, silly normans

>>54818933
Thanks to my boss firing me i finally got the courage needed to invest in crypto. Now my peepo stacks are up 10k and counting.
Sometimes you have to take the good with the bad OP

>>54820223
>Business is serious business
Step one, get a career instead of a job and then maybe you'll have the freedom to tell jokes while you work from home and get blowjobs with your camera off on the zoom call.
Nigger

>>54820234
>Let me use a pop culture reference to pwn these normal people. Those are the pinnacle of comedy and they will all bow down to me in fear of my cleverness and superior intellect.
>*leans back, sips Mt. Dew can*

>>54820277
Was Peter honest to the Bob's, or did he lie to them in order to maintain status at the normie company in hopes of keeping his job?

>>54820291
The Bobs wouldn't have taken him seriously in real life, because get this: it was a fuckin' made up movie.

How could the guy even tell wether it’s was a joke anyway?
>new driver comes
>never met him
>tells me the old driver died
>”oh he must be joking!”
Unless you knew him, what made you think he would knew you’re joking.

>>54820234
>>54820291
>what is satire

>>54820306
Normies entire worldview comes from movies

>>54820308
Unless I knew him, why would I care? He brings me boxes. I can't imagine the NPC tier customer that you'd have to be to hear that and break down in treats

>>54820308
You see, this requires a level of self-awareness and being able to imagine the logical conclusion the other person would come to that OP and faggots like >>54820291 can't comprehend. Exactly like how niggers chimp out at the slightest provocation: they simply don't have the capability to understand someone else's feelings.

>>54818968
>>54819242
>Light within
>LMAO MY BOSS DIED
>JK BRO
humor doesn't work if nobody but him finds it funny

>>54820368
I'm simply not a normie who gets socially parasitically attached to other humans I interact with throughout the day

>>54820386
I 100% believe you. It's also literally a nigger tier level of thinking.

>>54820403
Not really, if anything its more niggerish to feel ganglike attachment to the guy who brings you boxes. Do you think he wouldn't be there if he wasn't getting a paycheck?

>>54820277
>muh serious business

Both boss and customer are faggots. Getting fired for daring to make a joke instead of sucking off the 90th client of the day is retarded. Boss deserves his 50k/yr manager job and the value taken from him by inflation.

Normoids delenda est

>>54820386
What do you do for a living?

>>54820430
E-Commerce, and I don't give a fuck who picks up or drops off the packages

>>54818933
banter at work is forbidden
I still sometimes forget, the ONLY WAY OUT is to just literally ignore them and say nothing.
No excuses, explanations, apologies, etc.
Just look at them. Say "okay"

>>54820269
wage cuck faggot. go do your boss's biddings.

>>54820386
>socially parasitically
What does that even mean? The driver is probably a nice dude who regularly delivered packages to the customer. Maybe a bit of chit-chat once in a while. Then a new driver comes and tell him thay he died. It’s a common human response to be shocked when someone you know dies.

>>54820501
>someone you know
You don't know the driver, that's the point. If you chit chat with him he hates you for wasting his time. You are a social parasite who 'chit chats' every captive audience unfortunate enough to encounter you

>>54818933
lol. Yeah your either a psychopath or a schizoid. That was indeed funny though. For us that were not involved anyway.

>>54820528
Maybe you don’t and you hate it but believe it or not people do interact in the real world, and some of those interactions form into friendships or relantionships.

>>54820528
What's your relationship with your father like?

>>54820602
just because you're a homosexual doesn't mean everyone is.

topkek

>>54820602
Don't bother. This >>54820528 faggot is mentally challenged and so afraid of basic human interaction, he gets upset when someone says hello to him and internally justifies his fear on "wasting his precious time." An unbelievably textbook narcissist case. Look at his chosen profession for example: e-commerce, where he specifically doesn't have to put himself into uncomfortable situations dealing with people he believes are beneath him. I really hope the drop shipping course he paid for is working out for him because I can't think of much else he's capable of doing besides shipping a box from one location to another. Now that I think about it, he's not too far removed from a delivery driver himself lmfao.

>>54820702
>>54820606
>>54820602
>t. actual boomers who is 'friends' with every cashier in town

got a touch of the 'tism there OP. protip: if you must joke at work, make sure its actually funny

>>54820702
>all e-commerce is dropshipping
You're silly

>>54820727
>literally thinks building a sense of community and camaraderie is ganglike nigger behavior

>>54819459
>>54819850
Mistaking what we are saying for rage and being "uppity" is classic textbook autism.

>>54820772
>needs to build a sense of community and camaraderie with every single wagie that's getting paid to sit there forcibly interacting with you

>>54818933
lol, you are retard, if you do that kind of joke you have to be clear is a joke, old people use to create habits and thinks people like delivers, cashiers or people they cross a few words are some kind of "friends", so yeah you are retard

>fuck everyone
>I AM HERE TO WORK AGAINST MY WILL, DON'T TALK TO ME OMG
Typical incel chud mentality.
Can't socialize worth a shit.

>here's your package ma'am
>>OH EXCELLENT this box contains X for Y that's my _____ I met back in 19XX
>ma'am please I know I'm the only person you interact with every day but I don't go home until the other stops are done

>>54820475
Lower you tone thirdie

>>54820797
>>54820823
>completely incapable of acknowledging ma'am's small talk with a simple "oh, that's nice! welp, see ya next time!" and is so flustered with female interaction, he spergs out about how busy he is instead

>>54820880
>oh, that's nice! Welp, see y-
>>and tomorrow you'll probably be dropping off something for my grandson _________ , he's turning 1X and I wasn't sure what to get him so I was looking at those hoverboards but they're too expensive so I was looking at those
>that's great ma'am I need to
>>and that box you brought me last week I had to take down to the store to get sent back to amazon because the edge was dented and I'm not paying full price for a dented edge
You probably don't realize this because you're the person in this situation believing wagies are your friends

At the end of the day it's not a joke I would ever tell myself but I can see the humor in it from all angles
INTJ btw

>>54819322
nice. I cut meat for a living and when people ask if I make dogfood there I always tell them "No, we dont serve dog here." Also when people ask if our turkeys get any bigger always say. "No, they are dead"

>>54820979
Your last example about the dented box is actually something you should stop and listen to the lady about because it deals with the business aspect of your job, but again it's not surprising you're unable to pick up on this distinction.

>>54821021
>INTJ btw
No one asked.

>>54818933

yea that's retarded. getting fired for a bad joke? might be able to dispute with wrongful termination.

i don't know what the fuck is up with all the other posters in this thread saying your boss is based or whatever. either trolls or people exactly like your boss. i dunno anon, maybe he was told to layoff people and you happened to be the most convenient at the moment, but people who can't take "just a prank bro" also exist.

>>54821074
In that last example it was the product itself that was broken and dented not the packaging but glad you care a lot already for this fictional woman

>>54821117
>*moves goalposts, thinks to himself how clever he is for this insurmountable gotcha*
>*pushes up glasses, takes another sip from Mtn. Dew can*

>>54818933
Never joke with customers you don't know unless they start. And Christ, did you have to immediately go to he died? With that kind of inbred humor you're just asking for it. Of course normal people are going to get mad if it turns out a joke.You don't know what relationship they had with him. Why not just say you heard he had severe diarrhea or something, see how they handle that first.

>>54821166
>products can only be damaged in shipping
>let me tell you what you were imagining when you typed those words

>>54821195
In your own words, the box’s edge was dented. Christ, you are thick.

>>54818933
>1pbtid
Also checked

>>54820829
speak english wage-slave

>>54821230
>and that box you brought me last week I had to take down to the store to get sent back to amazon because the edge was dented and I'm not paying full price for a dented edge
>>let me tell you what you were imagining when you typed those words
m8 she's not real you don't need to simp this hard

>>54821256
Very successful bait thread.

>>54818933
People should learn to take a joke.
Seriously what kind suburban wasps (for the non English speakers: wasps are merely insects) start such a chain reaction? Cannabalistic parasites.

It wasn't a funny joke of you BTW.

>>54818933
how is that even a joke?
did anybody laugh? do you even think it i funny?
W boss, L OP

>hehuehuhehuehu
>the boss of my company died
>hehuehuehehuehu

>>54818975
That was a bit silly of you, but he should not have fired you. You could sue for wrongful termination.

>>54818933
you are a degenerate fuck

>>54819025
This anon is correct

>t. Construction wagie whos bantered multiple retards out of a job

>>54819018
The tism is what got him gotta read people to know what you can and cant joke about. I have a coworker with copd we all joke about him dying but its ok because we are construction workers.

>>54818933
Boomers: fires you for making a joke

Also Boomers: wtf why doesn't anyone want to work for me?!

>>54819403
I was talking with my boss and coworkers ended up calling the night shift niggers negros and my boss told me to call them what they are niggers.

>>54822289
Banter is just tiring as fuck. Had to deal with "banter" in one my clubs in uni, and all it did was let most people have fun while the remainder suffer and stay only because they like the activity the club does,
When the "bantz" people aged out of the uni, guess what? Everything became 100x better, literally no one was unhappy you didnt deal with people moving shit, egging you on or messing with your stuff. Everyone had a great time and more and more people joined and stayed. Sucks though because it was an indoor club and I think it basically died with covid.

I feel like the only people who like bantz are big fish in little ponds who think they need to prove something or are afraid people wouldnt be friends with them if they didnt do banter.

>>54819733
Your management is pathetic

>>54818933
>Pretending someone died, knowing that they'll show up again soon
Kind of okay but also kind of fucked up, you don't know how the person would react. Maybe just limit it to, "Oh, he's in the hospital, he caught [insert completely ridiculous/rare/made-up condition here]", where the customer will probably have an inkling that you're pulling their leg, and whatever kernel of worry they might develop dissipates when they find out something is wrong.

But that shit shouldn't be a fireable offense, you got screwed over. Boss' ego got involved somehow, or the customer overreacted.

>>54818933
>retarded wojak poster realizes 4chan is not real life and is surprised that his actions have consequences

>>54820380
>"LMAO MY BOSS DIED"

Is reading a small paragraph really that hard for NPCs?

>>54818933
that’s actually funny OP
costumer and your boss and most people in this thread are bitches
like how ducking close are the delivery guy and this costumer
he couldn’t think straight and didn’t sleep all night because he was sad about
no fucking way

he is probably just salty you bamboozeld him a bit since you are his inferior and than he got all butthurt at your boss
your boss can’t take a bit of heat from a clearly deranged costumer and say some like
>we are sorry won’t happen again we will take measures
but then don’t give a fuck about it because it’s clearly a nothing burger

also im glad i dont live in muttland where i can get fired for trivial shit

>>54822409
Bants is just a symptom on not giving a fuck on the construction side at least. We all know It doesnt matter if you're working hard or not it wont change your standing in the company. No one actually wants to do the job we are all just there for the paycheck. you only get a raise or promotion when someone dies or retires. Promotions are given based on seniority and politicking/brown nosing so havi g good bants with your supe is a positive. If you lose the job it doesnt matter because theres 30 other construction companies all ready to hire you at the same rate so why would you care when you could just fuck around.

It doubles as a way to pass the time we rarely have the time to have actual conversations about our interests, hobbies, or anything really. We do however have time to make a joke of fuck with a guy a little before getting back to work. Its better than being miserable and suffering in silence.

>>54819057
actually genuinely epic

>>54820795
I don't give a shit wagie how your mind interprets rage and being uppity
>autism
Do you actually think this is insulting on fucking 4chan of all places? Do you even know where you are, you retard?

>>54818933
>"yay, the delivery man is here, its always nice to say hi to him"
>its anon instead
>anon "your old driver died"
>"wait what? oh no, he was such a nice guy"

>go out to bar
>see old delivery man at bar
>"wtf i thought you were dead?"
>who told you that
>"some dumbass anon"
>go to anon's boss and tell him that anon is telling people that the delivery man died

>anon's boss calls him in, asks him about situation
>anon says that it was a "joke"
>boss gives him another chance to be apologetic and realize his mistake
>anon stupidly doubles down, triples down
>anon gets fired

You 100% deserve it.

>>54818933
Gotta hide that power level anon

>>54819025
I knew an off-shore rig worker. His friends bought a monkey off the coast of Madagascar and put it in his locker.

>>54824388
you really should see a psych if you haven't been diagnosed
he isn't trying to insult you by calling you an autist

I got fired from a job at an amusement park because I would get everyone strapped in on one of the coasters and then say something like "oh shoot one sec I forgot to activate the brakes" but i had already started the ride and would go OH NO as it took off

>>54818933
ITT: faggots try to give OP sensitivity training

>>54818933
Leave it to normgroids to get offended at OP's edgy joke

>>54821263
https://youtu.be/lGy8zJOXUiw

>>54818933
I was a good joke anon, I work a delivery job and we do those sorts of jokes all the time.

>>54818933
Lmfao

>>54818933
That's funny af. Cunt did you a favour go work somewhere else. Idk like a trade where you are valued..

>>54818933
/bant/ ?

>>54818933
>Did I really do wrong?
You'd probably do the same thing if you were in your boss's position. You upset the customer and caused the customer high emotional distress. The customer also loses trust in the employees of that business. Keeping you causes customer to somewhere else. So, you had to go.

It's fucked up, to be frank. But, I can see how you might have thought that it was a joke.

>>54818933
Your boss is a cunt.

Not only were you highly unprofessional, but you lied to your customer. What the fuck were you thinking?

>>54818933
>Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
go write your blog somewhere else

>>54818933
I just want to know how the fuck did you survive this far?

All of the normalfag replies in this thread is a testament to the absolute state of this board. There is no coming back from this.

>>54818933
You're definitely autistic with how you read the situation, how you delivered the joke, and how you handled your boss.

Read the situation. Don't tell the 86 year old Grandpa that his delivery buddy fucking died idiot.

Make that joke to the 19yo girl answering the door in her undies

/biz/ was this crammed with normies all along, what a nightmare
the actual places (read: financially successful) where I've worked people were cynical as fuck. What the fuck is wrong with you guys, are you that insecure about your social skills?

>>54819138
Imagine being a pussy wagie in a pussy area like you. I'm in the trades and I've had 3 different people jokingly say my prices are jewing them in the last couple months. I had one guy get very serious saying he had a question for me. Then he said "how the hell do you handle all the niggers around here?"
Trad tradies win again. OPs joke is about a 2/10 on the risk scale in my world you faggot

OP, you've being called a "retard" by a board literally full of retards, this time you really fucked up.

the full thread is filled with ocpd autists projecting on op in some kind of mental preservation of their bland, boring lives.
Do you guys actually go in the social world like this? controlling every single word and step?

>>54818933
Boundaries you autistic idiot. You can't joke with absolute strangers in a business setting about a person dying when they're still alive. You're absolutely stupid. Get your half conscious shit together.

>>54818968

>>54818933
A few people I've worked with have "died suddenly" recently, you have to remember that we don't live in the world that we used to. One guy was preparing a quote for some equipment for me, it drags on for a while, I ask what's up, and I get told that he just died completely unexpectedly at age 45 the week before

>>54819850
Kek. The wagie cope is unreal. Imagine spending your days afraid to make a harmless joke because you think you'll get fired LMAO. I'm surprised any of the wagies are even still up this late on a weekday

>>54818933
Op pranks are juvenile, unprofessional and fucking cringe. Grow the fuck up and learn your lesson. What you did is not a joke, it is a prank that aims at embarrassing or tricking another person. You never do that to a paying customer you fucking autistic retard.

>>54818933
>Delivery driver
kek

>>54818933
some people think that death is not a matter of jokes

You're a legend OP. You'll be alright. Chin up

>>54818933
Kek

>>54827779
>Unexpected
Doubt. I expect all v@xxies to die every day, so I'm never suprised when one of them does

Since we’re posting retarded ways we got fired

>work at auto parts store, 18 at the time, over a decade ago
>Bosch batteries and auto parts store hook up and hold contest
>name new battery and if chosen win $50
>cheap fuckers
>enter my name
>Bosch Super Turd ©
>send off and forget about it
>a week later get called into the office
>Bosch freaked out and my company corporate got involved
>they used time stamps and my login info to id me
>termination paper’s literally said “Bosch Super Turd ©”

that was retarded, but firing you was overkill, it's just a bad joke, don't make people think someone died

>>54818985
I make jokes semi-frequently to build rapport, but the jokes I make are intentionally unfunny and milquetoast, the point is to make it sound like it should be funny so people smile anyway which makes them think more positively about you. Stuff like 'Javascript is so silly and makes no sense haha' or 'that's kids for you, always crying haha'

>>54818933
This is the type of thing I would do and get in trouble. Does that mean I have autism too? Maybe I should warn people

>>54821021
Despite your NPC accusations, you're ironically the least self aware person itt lmao. Why are you even posting? You're obviously trying to impress someone, or make yourself feel big. If it's working for you then you're the master of cope, because everyone just thinks you're a social retard. That's not a good property. Independently successful people don't take a compromise; they're both socially and technically intelligent.

What's the reasoning for this? Op literally did nothing wrong. He could have said the guy was a pedophile and ops boss wouldn't be able to do shit. Fired for what? Talking?

>>54818933
I think that’s pretty lulzy OP. Today you were not a faggot, oh well onto the next job ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>54829177
But did it win the contest though?

I would have fired you too. Customers aren't there for you to fuck with for your own sadistic amusement.
>It was just a joke
Where is the punchline? The fact that you get to watch someone's emotional reaction?
This is genuinely the kind of thing sociopaths do so they can "harvest" the other person's emotions to try and understand how to impersonate a real human being better. Your boss is based for understanding why this isn't acceptable and why you had to go.

>>54829321
>be anon
>be bored out of your mind delivering
>decide to be a bit cheeky with a customer and tell him your coworker passed away to relieve some of the boredom
the only thing this retard forgot to do is to read the room and realize the customer was taken aback by this and say "I'm sorry I was just kidding, I'm stepping in for him this week."
you acting like he gave them a delivery box with excrement inside of it makes me thing some of you are legit social retards

>>54818933
Autism is a condition caused by the loss of spiritual link to the soul from brain inflammation resulting from getting vaxed young.
Without this spiritual component, empathy does not exist, and you become similar to psychopaths in that regard.

They want to make everyone like them because they are jealous of those who have a soul and emotions.
Unfortunately I don't know how to cure autism. Maybe you could try to do something to remove the toxic elements in your brain, and try to get the help of a healing medium and do a lot of meditation to recover your spiritual self.

>>54827390
How long do you know these people? None will talk like that if you know them for a week thats my point, if you know the other person well and they know your joking then i dont care if you tell him your moms dead or hitler was right

>>54829231
Yes. I have learned to communicate in NPC too. Work does that to you

>>54827390
Yeah, but you’re a brain dead retard and no one likes you.

>>54827818
I can’t think of any context where this is an appropriate joke to make to a total stranger.

>>54821027
based

>>54820797
Yes stupid. They’re still human beings. Do you even understand what dignity is? If you’re white, you’re the reason the white race is barreling towards extinction.

I mean deserved to get fired.

>>54818933
Oh, so you thought you'd try your hand at comedy, huh? Well, turns out delivering laughs is a bit harder than delivering packages! Your attempt at humor got 'returned to sender' and left you in a 'fragile' situation. Next time, maybe stick to the delivery route instead of a comedic detour – after all, you wouldn't want your next punchline to have an 'express shipping' straight to the unemployment line! Better luck next time, and remember – sometimes it's best to leave the jokes to the professionals!

Kek
You could have pretended you thought that was true, and you don't remember who told you he passed.

>>54818933
I chuckled irl. You've got a good sense of humor. Probably not a good idea to use it at a corporate job.

>>54818933
Genuinely can’t believe this happened. It would mean you’re a fucking retard beyond human comprehension.

>>54818933
You are a fucking psychopath

>>54829264
>because everyone just thinks you're a social retard
Oh no, not "everyone" on 4channel thinking I'm a social retard for my posts in this thread. How will I ever recover from this.
Oh, I'm not a female so I don't give a shit about 'everyone's' opinion about my opinion

>>54829871
I treat cashiers with respect and don't treat them as a captive audience who 'wants' to hear whatever shit I feel like talking about

>>54819567
>about 15 lawyers in there

imagine the stench of sulfur

>>54818933
>Joking about a colleague being dead
>Surprised when boss fires you
Assuming you're 20 years or younger (since you work a shit job) then you should use this as a learning experience to deal with your autism. Don't joke about being being dead you imbecile.

>>54818933
You can only get away with that sort of humor at work if you are an incredibly charismatic or popular chad, which I guess you are not. Keep that sort of dark humor on the internet and between close friends.

OP jokes about arguably the most feared event of life - death - to an old man randomly while on the clock.

Fix your shit

>>54818933
>Say terrible lie
>I-I WAS JUST JOKING!

Wow you absolute retard

You are the quintessential surprised pikachu face

>>54818933
>try to explain to him that it would have been worse if he had actually died but I would tell customers nothing is wrong with him and they learn about it later
Why would you try to use that as justification

>>54824964
Oil and gas guy in Wyoming, here. We put a dead antelope in a guys locker. Dude was a neat freak and germ-o-phobe. The foreman about pissed himself.

>>54819259
His job is to drive people, not to become soulless.

>>54830130
What was the GPT prompt, faggot?

>>54818933
What the issue? Just join one of many other delivery companies and keep delivering same shit

>>54818933
>> say "oh wow didn't you hear? He passed away unfortunately"
>I explain to him it was a joke
>He loses his shit and asks me what is wrong with me
>I explain that I thought it would be funny if they thought he was died and then the next week he would show up like nothing has happened
>Sort of like a surprise
And this right here is exactly why you're an autist posting on 4chan

>>54822289
>>54822409
I had one boomer who did nothing but bantz all day and he was funny as fuck, I loved him and he whipped me into shape. He knew when to dial it back and he could take a verbal beating too. At first I never really said much to him but one day I said fuck it and started making jokes about his huge beer gut, he did nothing but laugh about it and he liked me 100x more once I started firing back insults. It's all in good fun, they just want to see you talk shit too. When you work with people who are just quiet and awkward all day it makes everything a slog.

btw OP you could have just said he was a part-time journo and went on a trip to North Korea to interview NK Officials about their nuclear program or some stupid shit. It would have been funnier

>>54820602
I'm a delivery driver myself and I can't stand you motherfuckers. I have 150+ other stops to get to on a tight schedule. Me and every other driver literally do not have time to be your fake friend even if we wanted to. The only reason we don't explicitly tell you to fuck off is because you would cry and get us fired for doing so.

>>54836588
>making jokes about his huge beer gut, he did nothing but laugh about it
are you sure it was a real laugh? lol

>>54818933
lmfao, what if you were talking to one of his family members

>>54819050
okay, now THAT'S funny. Nice work Chud

>>54819078
nice bait, baitman

>>54819371
He could have also saved his job by apologizing, saying it was a terrible and stupid joke, and it will not happen again

your boss should have backed you up and told the customer the guy actually had died, and that he might be hallucinating

>>54831905
I was thinking a rotten eggs and 3 cups of joe brahps type of deal too

>>54837234
he was a jolly fat scotsman, he liked to talk a lot of shit and wanted nothing more than for other people to talk shit and say something funny. On the job we typically work in pairs, but we got a quiet, socially awkward 3rd guy we had to train up and from that moment on we did nothing but bust his balls until he cracked, now he walks in the office every morning telling jokes and putting a smile on everyone's faces.

>>54837865
I'm afraid I'd go overboard with my insults

>>54837884
you need to learn how lighthearted banter works. this is something minorities won't teach you since they often are the ones that go too far. he was the kind of guy who would lean his gut on your shoulder at the office or crop dust everyone after 10 hours of working in muggy woodland with swamp ass until you said something and his laugh would echo throughout. not all boomers are cocksucking assholes but a lot of them are.

>>54837914
what are some things you called him?

>>54837967
I never called him names, well except for mongol because he had lupus and it made him look like an old mongoloid man. Never minded and he wore it like a badge cause he was a history geek and thought it was creative. I would joke about him being a big fat bastard a lot, he would joke about me being short and skinny a lot and would always talk about how he was gonna roll me up into a soccer ball and kick me towards the next group of mexicans we see. We got a big surprise bonus one morning, went and bought some guns on the job and played around with them in the woods all day. Laughed about his gut concealed carry. We still call each other and shoot the shit every now and then.

>>54838154
>We still call each other and shoot the shit every now and then.
woah

I can't even imagine talking on the phone with my friends

I remember my fat dad would talk on the phone with his hunting buddy and just giggle like a little girl the entire time. I'm curious what they were talking about. seemed like he really enjoyed that

happy you have that to bring you joy :)

>>54838780
As much shit as boomers get I'm going to miss a lot of them when they're gone. They're the last social generation that are skilled in weird niche shit. Only a boomer could receive a random phone call from someone they used to work with and end up turning it into an hour long conversation about industrial boilers and other random stuff. Our generation and zoomers are mostly weird antisocial fucks that don't really know a lot of much at all.

>>54838937
my dad didn't know much, he was a blue collar, kinda (drove the city bus and was on welfare) but somehow could still manage talking to friends without issues.

I miss boomers already bros

>>54818933
>Be me
>Delivery driver
Zzzzzzz

>>54839105

>>54829401
>Hey where is Anon?
>Oh he died.
>Oh my god, that is terrible..
>haha just kidding he actually didn't die haha
if this is your idea of humor you should be fired just on principle.

>>54819523
You can't read, retard. Don't act superior to anyone in any way, ever.

>>54818933
you are both wrong, your boss trying to be as much socially acceptable as is, and you being an edgy retard that no one out of 4chan could understand

those two worlds are going to destroy one another if you don't find balance

>>54819459
I agree. What a bunch of fucking raging NPCs. I haven't read the replies to you but I'm going to assume they are still assmad

>>54819557
Society run by hooknosed tribe changed laughing something off to taking offense and playing victim.

>>54818933
wow youre such an stupid prick, the fact you dont even understand why youre a retard is amazing

>>54818933
you're a bit maladjusted OP

>>54818933
also
>1 post by this ID

>>54839338
I was expecting the story to turn into the old folks being the delivery boys grandparents who got him the job and have one of them die from the grief