/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>51304922
You guy were useless eaters anyways.

>>51304922
what were they doing to get fired? I thought they were still doing their job.

>>51304922
You quit on the team anon. It’s not management’s job to motivate you

>>51304922
>25
yeah fucking right, and I'm the queen of england
>>51304952
Now that's a man

>>51304948
the CEO got us into an all hands on meeting and showed us our quarterly JIRA productivity chart by story points, 80% of the people had on average 2 story points done in 4 months

>>51304922
Fast forward 3 months and management will be batching no one wants to work because they can't find replacements.

>>51304922
Same sort of thing happened to me
They fired every single person in my position and now just hire one independent contractor to do the job
2008 vibes are real

>>51305007
Lol, niggers think magic ll happen.

>>51304972
Doesn't it make more sense to fire the scrum master in this situation?

>>51305007
This happened to me a year ago. Entire project got canned team wiped and project contracted out to india. Financial services company.

I wish.
>was recently told I'm getting trained to do more.
I'm about to start a near month-long training to take calls from home. It sucks because before I just kept to myself fiddling with faxes but now I'll actually have to talk to people. I'm thinking about quitting after training is done and taking an extended vacation or half-assing the new job for a while before looking for a new job.

They're not going to increase my pay and $18 an hour is NOT ENOUGH to deal with NPCs and other assorted retards over the phone. If they bumped my pay up to $25 an hour, I might consider staying on but I don't see that happening.

>>51305304
the scrum master is the CEOs wife

>>51304922
did she fuck a klingon

>>51305381

>>51304922
I have one of these at my job. He came about a hairs breath from being fired last week. I dont think hes going to be there much longer.

>>51304922
80% or more of office jobs are unneccessary money grabs
i mean look at there is a subreddit called "overemployed", also threads sometimes,
it is people doing 4 jobs because software literally only takes 1-2 hours a day max and the rest is meetings and pretending to work. don't even get me started on all of the office women jobs.

>>51304972
wtf is a Jira story point?

>>51305432
the non technical manager decides how difficult your task is and assigns story points for it. If you dont collect enough bing bing wahoo points per month you get fired

>>51305468
holy shit they made "good boy points" a real thing

>>51305381
lol
lmao even

>>51304972
Lmao so management failed, boomers don't know how to manage remote workers.

>>51304972
So you know what the do during your planning. Pump the story points for each work item. Make dashboard to compare yourself to other teams and always stay in the top 20%.

>>51304922
>they fucking fired 80% of my department
That's because the COVID gravy train ran out and now every company has to start actually making money now instead of pretending they are.

>>51305381
many such cases

>>51305381
Hahahaha

>>51305363
Anon, an $18 hour job to sit at home and answer the phone is not worth $25 an hour. I'm sorry, but "talking to people" is not nearly as special of a skill for a company to pay you that much. There are new grads from engineering schools making that much at an entry level role in many places. Your best bet is to stick with it and try to get a second job working from home, so that you can make what you feel you deserve. Or, become more marketable and do something else for a living. I know it isn't what you want to hear but it's the truth

>>51305630
Exactly, too many people “working” 8 hours a day while really only doing 2 hours of actual work. Waaay too many worthless jobs that contribute literally nothing in society, it’s not sustainable.
t. NEET (I leech off the system and nobody cares lol)

>>51305396
>did she fuck a klingon

Nah... black/white parents make freaky children.

>>51305630
>is not worth $25 an hour.
It is for me, especially when wages are adjusted for inflation.
>There are new grads from engineering schools making that much at an entry level role in many places.
I don't give a shit. If other people want to suck dick for pennies, that doesn't mean I should. Maybe they should fight for a higher wage?
>Your best bet is to stick with it and try to get a second job working from home
I'm pretty sure I know what kind of work they have in mind. I'm certain I'll be on the phone fairly often so squeezing in extra hours probably won't work. I'd prefer one job where no one looks over my shoulder and I can work at my own pace with a decent wage.

I'm looking for some new jobs right now actually.

>>51305477
kek, and your ID SUCs CoCs
I wonder what other tactics they use to humiliate software wagies.
Also checked

>>51305803
(((the media))) portrays mixed babies as "cute".

>>51305803
that fucking jawline holy shit Vitalics momma

>>51305468
>the non technical manager decides how difficult your task is
Kek I may as well start packing. Same shit, decided fuck this and "quiet quit" over 18 months ago.

>>51305630
Depends on the job, I get $25+ an hour to take calls but Im health insurance industry related so if I don't solve the problem on the call it runs into the tens of thousands.

But then again I like my job and am in a union so I feel for anyone stuck in a job they hate.

>>51305468
>the non technical manager decides how difficult your task is and assigns story points for it.

Non-technical have ZERO idea what is hard and what is not.
Seriously!
Tell them you need to change the font sizes on ALL the website pages, thousands of them.
They think it will take you weeks.
Literally is a one line code change.

>>51305803
Mixed babies should be illegal. The entire human race will end up looking like an abomination

>>51305630
$18 an hour in like Turkmenistan you mean? Inflation in the west is still high, $25 an hour after taxes is about $19 and some change take home.
$18 an hour would not afford to buy cockroach milk in some parts of America. You can either blame workers or start asking questions like if the ceo’s slag of a wife needs a jet to get coffee.

>>51305381
based shit i hope they grifted all the capital from vc retards

>>51305803
You can get the pigment out of the skin, but not the black out of the dna.

>>51304922

>>51305468
>>51305477

Nope, it's the team that votes on how difficult (how many points) a task is worth.

>>51306590
I assume you can't have fractional points right?
Insist that your task be broken up into smaller subtasks, that it "helps me focus" or something. Even if the task is trivial they have to give it at least one story point.

>>51304922
The future of office work is hybrid. Two or three days in the office. It keeps workers tethered while also cutting down commute.

>>51304922
homie why she look more manly than many men she eat that growth hormones and antibiotics from the cheap meats and drank dat sewer water and eat dose anti baby pills

>>51304972

bump the points. Always over estimate it. That way you look good

>>51304972
>story points
wat da fook u talkin bout nigger

>>51306590
oh even better, if my team hates me or even is just stupid they can hang me out to dry

>>51304922
>his motives go beyond your human comprehension

>>51306219
Nigger

>>51305823
>I need to be paid $225,000 a year to work at a remote call center
Do Americans REALLY?

>>51305318
A major one? Can you say what letter company starts with?

>>51304922
>2004
>Work at a production house in NYC
>a week and a half before Christmas Management calls a company wide meeting
>Everyone fills into one of the studios.
>a lot of big talk from fellow employees
>"They better not be going cheap on bonuses this year or I'm out the door"
>Management announces it's laying off 90% of the staff.
>Lot's of Men and women crying, and asking why?
>My face when I didn't get a pink slip.

My work load went up 10 fold.

>>51306590
No wonder that no works gets done, they got you poor fuxkers wasting time on voting how hard everyone else's job is.
Absolutely retarded

>mfw they're implementing jira + agile story points into my non-software/non-coding team

This shit is fucking cancer for non-coding. More than half of our tasks are completely reliant on getting knowledge from SME's and general knowledge gathering. There can be multiple 'product backlog items' with the exact same structure and DoD but have wildly different levels of effort and timelines that can't be known until the tasks are started.

>>51304922
my old company made the news
tldr; hire someone from china to move to singapore, cancel the offer while the guy is in singapore airport
https://www.reuters.com/world/asia-pacific/tech-workers-left-hanging-sea-e-commerce-arm-shopee-rescinds-job-offers-2022-09-06/

>>51304922
>>51304972
>NOOOO!!!! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!!!!!!
>I'M EXTRMEELY IMPORTANT!!!!!
>I WRITE JAVASCRIPT CODE!!!!!! NO ONE ELSE ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET IS THIS SMART -- AS SMART, AS ME!!!!!!
>I MADE THE COMPANY $48 TRILLION DOLLARS WITH JUST 10 MINUTES OF WORK LAST WEEK!!!!!!!!!
>I AM THE COMPANY!!!!!
>IIIII AAAMMMMM THEEEE COMPANYYYYY!!!!!!
>FINE! FINE! FINE!!!!!! I'LL JUST GET ANOTHER WFH JOB THAT PAYS EVEN MORE!!!!!!!
>BECAUSE I AM EXTREMELY VALUABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
codeniggers get the rope

>>51307481
Silicon Valley corporate culture and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race

>>51305850
more people probably believe trannies can actually be real women than believe this though

>>51307495
you done cleaning my toilet yet?

>>51304972

Management by story points or Jira stats means management has failed completely.

>>51305630
I start cart pushers at 17.50

>>51305318

I'm in the opposite situation. Previous management canned everyone and hired India and Philippine offshore teams to do the work on the cheap. Now I work there for a premium to un-fuck the mess they made of the whole thing. And it's so bad I'm thinking about leaving.

Has any anons worked in a company where they fired janitorial and outsourced it? I refuse to believe it's a common occurrence

>>51304972
Holy fuck 2 story points is literally:
“Change the wording in 2 error messages”

If it took 4 months to do that… well. That is really pushing them to do something

>>51307573
i work in corporate finance at a company you've definitely given money to in the past few months, wagie. guess what our forecast for IT cost center payroll expense looks like for the tail end of 2022.

>>51307495
>codeniggers get the rope

Cope. Seethe. Rage. I'm done, though. Making $140k per year on 15 minutes of real work per day sounds fun, but I'm rolling that shit into a Commercial Pilots license. 80% of what I do is self-marketing. The other 10% is trying to interpret the piss poor requirements stakeholders and MBA types shit out for me to implement. At least with a jet, you can either do it or you cannot. There is no ambiguity. And no matter how important someone thinks they are in their organization, if I as the pilot fuck up, we're all a smoking crater.

In the end, I really do love what I do. But everyone's either a retarded MBA / C-Level dipshit or a gate-keepy, try-hard tech bro who holds himself up as the standard to which everyone else should attain and, who despite the t-levels of an 80 year old man, will stop at nothing to throw you under the bus to advance his own career. It's all so tiresome.

>>51304972
Imagine the bants being thrown in the manager meeting when this was announced.

You should only wage slave enough to get passive income from POS cryptos like CNDL and ICY Pee. Once you accumulate enough to live off of, you can do whatever you want with your time.

>>51304922
Is that a fucking Klingon baby?

>>51305381
seems like he did you a solid by firing you

>>51307707
i work in corporate finance as qa. part of my job is to export defect reports from jira because finance is too retarded to click 2 buttons. don't ever assume you're not expendable because you could be automated by couple python scripts and be out of work within a week if some zoomer showed up. in fact almost everyone in this god's forsaken enterprise could be laid off and nobody would notice.

>>51305803
how can anyone look at that and not see an Orc

how the fuck do some western women look so old in their TWENTIES?
here in japan the women often look quite good even in their forties..
the absolute state of the westoids who chase these hogs

>>51309176
The tinder circuit takes it's toll on the body

>>51307779
Wait until Jonny Rocketship here finds out about all the paperwork he is going to have to figure out the moment he disengages the autopilot and has to explain to the airline why he did it. Or the fact that the majority of landings are being performed fully automatically.

Don't mean to shit on your dreams bud, but if you don't think a Commerical Airline has office politics and that all pilots are super cool hi-test fun bros, you are in for a fucking rude awakening.

Most commercial airline senior managers are run by one of two sociopaths:
(a) Super competitive highly passive aggressive former air force pilots with hi-rent MBA's or
(b) Vicious 40+year plus union flight attendant management slag who is still bitter that pretty girls get more attention

Wish you well bud, but don't burn the bridge at the tech company on your way out. I know tons of good pilots who fucking rage quit the airline world.

t.commercial airline chad

>>51309371
>I know tons of good pilots who fucking rage quit the airline world.

I live 3 miles from a jet Charter FBO that churns through pilots on their way to the airlines. I want no part of the airlines. I want to fly business charter. I'll be chilling in Tampa, Vegas, or Martha's Vinyard flying Citations or Premiers. Don't even care what it pays. I've stacked enough raping the tech world.

>>51309425
Good luck breh! Im sincerely happy for you. I'm just just a hack hobby pilot.

I just bought a SR22 Cirrus and fucking love it. See pic from my hangar. I live in a comfy suburb with a private airstrip and all my neighbors are cool as fuck pilots.

I worked (work on the side) as an airline mechanic for many years and made lots of friends in the industry so thats why I warned against utopian thinking.

Clearly you are on the right path breh. WAGMI!

I got fired brehs... They didn't even tell me why, just pulled me in with the HR roasties and told me I'm no longer employed and gave me a severance package. I have a wife and 2 kids to take care of

>>51311615
Sell drugs

>>51305906
A literal bug person. Like a fly that beats itself against the window trying to get out.

>>51311665
I'm trying to short the ETH and BTC charts when I see some big poompas on the chart. I plan on living off unemployment and my severance package for a couple of months and get a few certifications. It's been pretty comfy so far but I'm a little nervous. Wish me luck bros.

>>51311891
It sounds weird, BUT divorce your wife.
As a single mother of two she will get big welfare checks.

You can still be with her and be a great Dad.

Blacks in America learned long ago not to get married but instead have single mother families for the welfare checks.

>>51311998
fuck dude, that sounds like a highway to child support checks for the rest of my life, plus wife wouldn't be happy if I wanted to divorce her on paper. Might end up to actual divorce. I'm using all the unemployment I can though. and Also gonna try for food stamps

>>51307691
Yeah. Happened around 3 months ago. The place is dirty as fuck now. 2 jeets do the cleaning now. One takes a 40minute shit as soon as he turns up. (4 hour shift). The girl has 5 breaks.

>>51305381
fking megakek

>>51312057
>plus wife wouldn't be happy if I wanted to divorce her on paper. Might end up to actual divorce.

Marriage is more than a piece of paper.
Why should you struggle like crazy, when Aquanetta gets big fat welfare checks AND lives with her husband (in every way but legally).
MOST, yes MOST, African Americas are born out of wedlock and supported on Welfare.
Blacks have learned to game the system.

Welfare was designed to help those who need it most.
The more pathetic and hopeless you appear the more you will get.

>>51307633
I don’t know what any of these office jockey jargon words mean but if it took 2 months to do something incredibly simple then it wasn’t incompetence it was by design and this was the metric they choose to use because it showed what they wanted to show. Imagine not knowing how management thinks.
t. Management

>>51312199
I got fucked when I tried to use state assistance like 3 years ago - I applied and was approved and then they retroactively checked my elegibility when tax season came around and realized I wasn't a good goy with my application and I've been paying off a debt to the state ever since, so I'm apprehensive about trying to game the system again. What if I divorce my wife and the state realizes we still live together and considers us some sort of legal partners or something? Idk man it just seems way too risky.

>>51312248
>I don’t know what any of these office jockey jargon words mean

Then don't chime in, dipshit.

>>51309371


>(b) Vicious 40+year plus union flight attendant management slag who is still bitter that pretty girls get more attention

I used to do corrections and I would see this all the time. Senior female officers would seethe so hard when new cute female officers were hired. They would intentionally treat the new officers like shit because they knew they were going to be getting fucked in the by the senior management. Women lose value as they age. Simple as.

>>51307495
based

>>51312313
>the state realizes we still live together and considers us some sort of legal partner

African Americans do this ALL THE TIME.
MOST African Americans are born out of wedlock.
The mother declares that she has no idea who the father is and receives welfare.
The State does NOT 'check up' on her to see who she is living with.
The 'husband'/father gets to enjoy the comfort of a family paid for by the State.
The 'wife' gets a stay at home man to help her raise the kids.

Welfare was designed with the thought that people do NOT want to receive help but instead want to work hard and 'succeed'.

Absolute insanity when given to people who are perfectly happy living off of other people's taxes.

>>51307495
Based, JavaScript devs should indeed get the rope.

>tfw I slack off a lot
>80% of the people who worked in the company got fired
>im still standing
cant wait to get a raise!

>>51305468
If this is real then codeniggers are the lowest of the low. Holy shit I wfh doing medical billing and if my boss ever even said the words story point to me in a work setting I would be putting in my two weeks.

>>51305381
Lmao

>>51305468

This estimation is usually done by the developers/wtv themselves.

>>51304922
>quiet quitters become a trending term
>mass firings begin
This'll be good to watch

>>51307481

Alway pad story points whenever possible.

>>51305381
there are people on this board still betting on FIAT money

I LOVE WAGE THEFT I LOVE WAGE THEFT

>>51305823
if anyone off the street can do your job you know youre fucking worthless. you dont even deserve 17 or whatever the fuck youre getting because your attitude is so bad. thats -$50 from your next paycheck wagie.

>>51304922
Why was the file deleted?

>>51312624
This sounds like a golden ticket towards fraud. I'm sure they need to verify our addresses somehow. I'll probably fuck up and list my address on the unemployment site, or another gov. site applying for assistance and they'll throw me in a cage with tyrone. I just can't bring myself to do it, anon.