/biz/ - Business & Finance

SOXS is a scam

I will never touch gas or oil again fuck that

>$1.5 trillion bailout is needed
>entire EU budget is only $150 billion
>Germany's is $500 billion
Europe is completely fubar

>Bobo opening more shorts

>>51304496
yeah but the thing is I like making money in bear markets

>>51304533
Isnt britains planned energy bailout in the 100s billions?

>>51304512
No, it's just a tricky tool

Do high interest rates really matter if no one can afford to borrow? Do people really think people are going to pay 10% or more for their dollars when there is no prospect of growth in an increasingly demoralized world set up for contraction in virtually any economics ideology that's been though up since mercantilism got btfoed

>>51304551
correct yes, and to fund all of this they are now discussing negative interest rates for next year

Ive only made 55k leafbucks during this bear market bros, thats gotta only be like 40k real dollarydoos :(

at this rate im going to have to get a job or something.

>>51304561
De globalized*

What is the next play? I missed party city below 2.
No tranny conductors
No oil and gas faggots
No carvana gay shit
Give me a gem, In return I will post my sister

>>51304533
For comparison, TARP in 2008 was $700B, which is like $1T in 2022 dollars.

bros why dont people just put 80% in a safe index fund and gamble with the rest of 20%? If you have a 250k per year job its easy to make it in a few years like this

>>51304594
Greed. It's always greed. Same reason those BBBY faggots didn't put exit prices to trigger when they were x4 and now they are down a shitload

battery companies are a scam

don't invest in rechargeable batteries, we're going to use disposable batteries until fuel cells arrive

>>51304594
thats nothing, why do we have portfolio managers who actively trade the market, charge fees up the ass and still fail to beat the market ?

>>51304594
Are you seriously asking why everyone doesn't have a 250k per year job? I'm thinking you're unemployed.

>>51304642
250k per year is average after you pass 30 years old if you're not a fuckup though. This goes for both tradies and white collar job

When VIX was 40 my asshole tingled in the good way.
When VIX was 40 I had butterflies in my stomach.
When VIX was 40 my heart would pound and I’d be able to scream and shitpost violently and start race wars in /smg/ threads during market hours.


But no longer. It’s all boring now. VIX. I yearn for more VIX.

>>51304648
Kek delusional mutt

>>51304648
>average
kek

>>51304652
I own the UVIX.
When should I sell it?

Can any Wizards here use some of their Spinal energies to make the market green tomorrow?

>>51304652
Gex is real low so your vix should pay off soon. The anonymous shilling butterfly options strats based on low vol will be posting pink wojaks soon, you watch.

>>51304671
I'm thinking that the VIX will be green.

>>51304681
im thinking your moms pussy will be blown out

>>51304648
>250k per year is average after you pass 30 years old if you're not a fuckup though
excuse me?

>>51304667
when VIX does a +20% intraday

>>51304681
>>51304667
>>51304652
how much money can I make off a single vix leap if a black swan happens

Just print loads of money and lower interest rates what’s the problem it worked for 50 years why wouldn’t it work now?

His skin so black...so smooth... I need it... I need scoopsies...

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=TJdM9dazxQo&feature=share

>>51304728
that guy is way to white to be our favourite nigerian twink bussy seller.

>>51304728
That's a used car salesman phenotype.

>>51304533
Europe speedrunning its entire economy into a depression any% world record pace.

But seriously what the fuck were they thinking? Did they not look to what happened to Japan, Venezuela, Zimbabwe or Weimar fucking Germany???

>>51304736
Just deliver the package...

>>51304728
I think Tinny would fuck up scoops in a fight

batteries?

ohohohoh
batteries, more like SCAM

>>51304594
>its easy to make it

>>51304758
So ENVX is a scam?

BNP just halted trading my EQNR longs, we're fucked

>>51304778
don't encourage the soc freaks

>>51304780
>he bought the natural gas top

I'm going to bed
Scoopsies is a coward

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=YIOHSoaKPTk&feature=share

I've only just got a decently paying job. Is it too late for me to buy a house? Interest rates are going to keep going up, right? Is my only hope at this point to just put down 80%?

>>51304808
Its not even winter in europe, this isnt the top, couldnt have known about that 1.5T margin call shitfest

>>51304826
>Its not even winter in europe
you do realize the market is forward looking right? right???

>>51304838
Normal markets, not in this case, they cant

I can't tell if I should be buying or shorting. You're supposed to short at the top, not after months of plummeting, but then again, is there any reason for things to recover in the short term?

Maybe not the right place to ask this but here goes.
My dad is about to start a new job paying twice what he was earning before (~25k / month after taxes) and is now going to be earning 40k+ after taxes per month depending on deductions.
He already has a few mil saved up in retirement, 2mil+ in a TIAA retirement account (he's a doctor) and 1mil in bank accounts / savings / other retirement accounts. He's in his early 60s now, and while many doctors continue working into their 70s I think he's likely to retire in another 5 or so years depending on how he's feeling. His new job is actually going to be much less busy and less stressful than his old job at a public university hospital where he was on-call all the fucking time and constantly busy.

What's the best way to capitalize on the additional income he's going to be earning, ETFs? I really know nothing about the market or investing. I have told him to talk to a financial adviser once he gets settled and figure out a plan.

>>51304877
>implying speculation doesn't exist

>>51304879
Cardinal rule is if you're not sure then don't do anything. Wait for a better setup.

>>51304879
jpow talks on friday. but then we have cpi next wednesday, if it comes in cooling we will pump since the fed wanted multiple cpi reports going down. then on the 21st they will do their last large hike, if cpi was cool, it could be 50 bps. everyones bearish and miserable

>>51304680
I do Batman butterflies and hope for high vol. You obviously don't trade them everyday if you think they are just for low vol or crabs

>>51304891
So now its speculation, prior you were pretty certain "the top" is in retard

>>51304811
wtf is that webm lol

Your most unhappy customers are your greatest source of learning

>>51304887
>retirement in 5 years
>investing

Are you delusional?

>>51304887
I would play it extremely safe and stick to cash cause stuff may not be stable in the next few months. Divvy stocks are probably not the way to go unless you're confident the price will stay stable

>>51304966
I worked at a pharmacy where schizos would have actual violent meltdowns that required us to call the police to have them removed. What can we learn from that

>>51304984
Some pharmacist seem like they can't do calendar math and get confused that some months have 31 days and won't fill a 30 day script til 24 hours later when someone desperately needs their meds a doctor prescribes them

>>51304887
sounds like he has a ton of money saved up already. i would wait maybe 6 months or so, enter the market slowly and build a conservative portfolio, at his age he doesnt need to build his wealth by magnitudes, but rather preserve it safely. definitely talk to the advisor. and diversify his holdings, dividends, bond indexes, and broad market index funds like VTI. you dont need to take on incredible risk either, so having a cash position isnt a bad idea(depends on your currency risk)

>>51304961
Apparently it's a real commercial but I can only find one youtube video of it so I wouldn't be surprised if it was filmed as a joke

>>51305023
It's a database that tracks your narcotics, drug addict. A 30 day supply is a 30 day supply, whether you fill it on the 1st or the 2nd. You aren't given 31 pills for October and 30 in November.

You're also allowed to fill around 2 days before you ACTUALLY should be filling, but if you do it too often, the database says "no, this pill popper has been doing this too often, fucker is abusing the system." And they block you.

Inflation has definitely cooled I think, I can feel a pivot coming soon.

NPSMJM

>>51304942
Natural gas increased 30% on Monday, the top is far from being here. The other retard probably cant figure out you get margin called on a short position when prices increase

>https://www.reuters.com/business/energy/no-stream-eu-gas-markets-brace-price-surge-after-latest-russia-gas-cut-2022-09-04/

>>51305091
I don't go to doctors or do prescription drugs prescribed by them, drug dealer. I only use natural medicine

NSVR2

What happened to Coupang. is Amazon buying it?

>>51304879
JPOW, CPI, OPEX then the new Shemitah.
>straddles and let Jesus take the wheel

G2HKS

>>51304594
Kill every single american

I feel like bbby is primed for one last pump and a sweet little dump.

All this shit about nuclear power and UUUU still won’t pump back to $10

>>51304496
The end of the dollar is coming

https://twitter.com/GoldTelegraph_/status/1567163462744252416

>>51305444
that means stocks will go up btw

>>51304942
Stop day trading. Change your investing horizon to decades and you will stop crying about not timing your purchases properly. Just buy things that are currently fairly priced. Commodities always been very volatile. If you can't stomach 50% fluctuations then they are not for you.

>>51304594
That IS what I do.

>>51305444
yeah we heard about this 2 weeks ago, abd 2 fuckin weeks before that faggot. so when the fuck is the dollar going to explode?

>>51305540
Patience. When the margin calls in Europe get too big for even bailouts to save the jews, that's when BRICS will make even more moves to kill the petrodollar this winter.

>>51305119

At least half the reason they're tightening is to put the world into a recession to kill Russia's energy revenues. Bit like burning your own house down in hopes your neighbor's catches some embers. Insane and retarded, but then so was "ESG".

They're obsessed with trying to defeat Putler, so that's just what it is for now. They can't accept that they already lost, so we get this crazy shit until they're finished coping and seething.

bull bros.........the futures.......are healing

>>51305659
>but then so was "ESG"
I wish we could refer to esg in past tense. Still very much 'is', present.

>last 3 days
>profit: $8344.26
I love this trading environment crab bros.
we're in a +-1% trading range after that Jpow Jackson Hole plunge and it's too easy to do intraday long/short trading.
we will continue until next week tuesday CPI print until then make your money and hedge for the next big leg down (June lows)

>>51304714
50x

>>51304594
>t 80% in a safe index fund and
Because most of us want to retire this century dude. And not when we are 60 years old.

>>51305883
IM GONNA COOOOOOOOOOOOM

>>51305938
we all will, anon

Whats the QRD of EQNR and energy 1.5 trillion margin?
I wanted to get in after Russia stopped Nort stream but this shit goes down every day. It doesnt make sense

Goddamn I hate chinks so damn much bros. Why the fuck do they need to lock down again over a fucking coof. It's fucking bullshit.

>>51306012
They are fucking with us at this point

>>51306004
To cover margin calls from rising prices Equinor estimated it would cost $1.5 trillion. The margin calls havent hit yet but its more of a fear thing that euros need to do something about gas/electricity prices now.

>>51306004
I don't think anyone knows anymore

>>51304496
Bump for not a shit coin.
Also, interest rates go up now kiddies.

>>51305883
Cramer said June was the bottom lol

>>51304818
Dont panic.
Higher interest rates will attract capital back into boring shit like savings accounts etc....
Capital adequacy ratios being in the green again will losen up lending, albeit at a higher interest rate.
Actually kinda good to see the end of TINE

>>51306164
>cramer said
can't get a better sell signal

>>51305162
Based poppy farmer

>UBI
>-15%
>unusual volume
EU gamers rise up what happened?

How fucked are we?

>>51306433
>low production capacity wont be fixed by raising rates
WOOOOOW like many of us have said here that inflation is a supply issue mainly.
>inb4 fed goy shill
Whatever. Its obviously not going to be fixed by raising rates.

Japan is dumping its treasuries. Look at the overseas bonds lmao

>>51306433
Unless the fed pulls a 500bps rate hike, then we are fucked no matter what.

>green futas
uuuuh bobros???

>>51304561
in medieval times it was worth borrowing to raise an army and go take the neighbor's treasury and tax base
we probably wont be doing that but there are ventures that yield 20% and so people will borrow at 10% to do those, while not borrowing to do the risky 5% ones

>>51306459
>>51306499
so, what do we do about it?

Will COIN ever recover?

>>51306549
Nothing you can do. Biden is a retard and should have fixed it in Jan when this whole saga started to unfold. He could have issues oil permits and met with them and done some other tricks to go full pump mode. Would have helped a lot. He cant fix chips in a year but everything else can be mitigated if he lowered oil.

>>51306554
not until you stop touching yourself

What limit order price should I buy sqqq at?

i saw a dream of two big red candles in front of me in a chart. im kinda spooked now.

last time i saw a market dream was a siga boil bursting and it was like 24 at the time.

>>51304496
Hahaha top kek with these siga links. Thanks op

>>51304496
>Links for SIGA holders
It is at a support level right now. It might roll along around here for a bit, but without news, it's plummeting to the next support at around $10. After $10, there's no support till $5 or so.

what kind of order type would i use if i want to;
sell X at 50% above y but limit the downside to 25% below z?

wow this is a fucking trainwreck. more bailouts in europe?!

yurop indeces are half red and half green

>>51306939
sell limit order with a stop loss?

>Mfw buying more divi stocks
I'll make money in the long run with drip. I hope.

>>51306968
i'll go to heaven after i die. i hope.

That it, I'm exiting all markets. Oil dumping in the premarket this morning is the last straw for me.

>>51306986
ok cya tomorrow

>>51306952
cheers. what if i want to;

if X increases 50% above y limit sell only if it drops back to y+50% else let it ride?

basically what order do i use if i want the stock to ride above the trigger but sell if i falls back to trigger?

So, apparently DWAC has postponed the results of the shareholder vote on whether or not the merger with TMTG will happen to Thursday. Correct me if I'm wrong but, should the merger fail, wouldn't DWAC's stock price basically plummet to literal $0, since the potential merger was the only reason it had any value at all? Is buying puts on it basically free money? I'm wrong, right?

>>51306942
You know what that means...

Great Depression 2.0 here we fucking goooo!!!

I can’t wait to buy SPX puts five minutes into open and call it a day.

>>51304587
£130 billion. Equal to their National healthcare spending or 5% of GDP. Just to print more money while capping prices. It's almost like they are intentionally nuking the economy.

Overnight comments indicate Japan is hesistant to intervene in the fx market.
Another swan to note is the Yuan is about to decisively move into the 7's.

Uranium

>>51307163
>It's almost like they are intentionally nuking the economy.

yup thats what they are doing.

>>51304751
>But seriously what the fuck were they thinking

It was all planned anon. Time to invest in bug factories.

Can anyone confirm if this strike is real or not?

https://twitter.com/ChuckCallesto/status/1567169434795606016

350,000 UPS workers going on strike...why am I not hearing this shit on MSM?

>>51307237
>he thinks msm is to inform him
>he doesn’t know msm is to manipulate him

>>51307249
Well that and MSM has also been real quite about a possible nationwide railroad strike, 115k railroad workers walk off for 30+ days. Shit's so fucked up man.

Love

is it gonna be a mumu day since smg is so bearish??


also i was thinkin of timing my gym time before open on market days. so im more focused and pumped.

>>51304901
he talks tomorrow not friday

>>51307292
Msm has been all-in the liberal world order. Talking about the economic meltdown, Union strikes, covid jab deaths, etc would hurt their narrative.

my portfolio has been flat for the past 6 fucking weeks and i'm going fucking insane

Nigga, who? (Soulo), nigga, what? (Yeah)
>Your jaw just dropped, bitch, pick it up
Pick it up (pick it up), pick it up (pick it up)
I got at least infinity flows, abstract, asshole
Ab-soul infinity stone, end game for my enemy, yo (hah)

>30 year treasury bond at 3.48%
OOOOOOOO FIXED INCOME BROS!! WAGMI!

wtfwt

wtf was that

PREMARKET JUST RUGGED
FUTAS TURNED LESS GREEN
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>51307506
>>51307520
In the industry, we call that "a preview"

>>51307570
>>51307520
>>51307506
can't find any news (yet)
bank of england governor bailey was speaking in front of parliament earlier, but that was a while ago - and wouldn't have caused those candles

>>51306711

I just woke up, looks like red futures a morning traders take warning.

>>51307588
I think it was the Iran/Albania headlines.

Who do I contact for a refund?

Yesterday: Green futures, Red day
Today: Red futures... green day?

>>51307738
Nope red futures means really really red day.

Biz is especially slow today, what gives?

WHAT'S THE NEWS FOR APPLE TODAY
THERE'S SOMETHING TO BE UNVEILED?

Sup anons

I started working, and want to invest some money into safe ETFs. Since I'm located in Europe what are my best options?

TLDR: Best ETF for euro anos, hold 30+ years

>>51304611
>fuel cells
that shits a scam too lmoa

>>51307759
Yes they are bringing back Johnny ive

>>51307778
Consumer stables and world index, maybe some dividend kings etf too

Consumer stables performed better than msci world this shitty year

>>51304540
Based gif. Imagine someone taking their public bus driving job seriously. Most of the time on public buses I'm just wondering if we're going off the road when we start passing.

Mumus....

>>51307836
>makes fun of people driving buses
>admits he rides the bus

Why are all the major asset classes (indices, bonds, pms, oil) moving in unison?

>>51307857
I've ridden a public bus like once or twice in my life when I needed a ride like 300 miles and didn't have a car or someone to pick me up. A lot cheaper than any other option for that distance. It was like $20.

>>51307880
because everything is over

>premarket

>>51307880
This is the end.
https://youtu.be/jixsOzH1Lrw

>>51307836
>Most of the time on public buses I'm just wondering if we're going off the road when we start passing.
Something like that happened in my cunt not too long ago, the bus driver got off the highway, literally just forgot to brake on the ramp and busted through the railing on the other side of the overpass.

>>51307880
Inflationary bear market.

ITS OVER

>>51306126
from the thumbnail i thought she was letting out a massive fart haha, would be crazy if she did that haha

uhhhh , fellow apes?

Morning S EM GEEEE

>>51304611
Fuel cells are literally braindead-tier from both an engineering standpoint and a business standpoint

>JPY-31% for the year
Are Japtards going to survive this

>>51308062
GOODBYE

>>51308060
I feel bad for that monkey :(
I dont feel bad for the apes though

>>51308073
CHIN UP FREN, IT IS NOT OVER FOR YOU

>>51306459
Raising rates lowers demand, no?

>>51304818
>too late

brother this year is literally the worst time you could possibly buy a home since in the last 50 years

How many crabs we gunna do today?

>>51307958
Public busses are empowering the illegals to infiltrate further into the country, we should just make the public busses illegal.

>>51304581
still is Party City

I expect elevated volatility following JPow speaking tomorrow.

>>51304818
What you should be doing is saving cash honestly. Cash on the sidelines in a high interest rate environment will be good. Then get a house and cheap assets with cash in a few years.

>24 year old poorfag here
Just got a full-time job at $17/hr Clearing around 75-80 hours total a pay period (about $2,400 a month). Where the fuck else should I putting my money? I would like to pad most of my portfolio with index funds/bonds, but I also want to dabble into a bit options with leftover cash for possible shorter-term gains. Is this a retarded move, why or why not?

>>51304546
Howdy partner

>>51304594
This is what a large amount of biz does, if I was to guess
>quarter mil a year
Probably closer to 90k

>>51308181
i save $1k per payday and im just buying oil/gas while everyone forgot that SPR is subsidizing oil prices right now, similar thing with natural gas

>>51308181
You should gamble until you hit it big and then switch to a conservative portfolio. Otherwise the path of financial security becomes an insurmountable wall that you will spend your whole life climbing.

>>51308230
nooOOoo you have to buy the heckin etf for 40 years on average income and then retire to drop dead 5 years after

>>51308158
At least 3

>>51308181
just be yourself

>>51308181
>I would like to pad most of my portfolio with index funds/bonds, but I also want to dabble into a bit options with leftover cash for possible shorter-term gains. Is this a retarded move, why or why not?
another alternative you have open to you is doing the same thing you're doing allocation wise, just by doing it with option spreads
eg. selling put spreads on a stock you're bullish on, instead of buying shares
it's more capital efficient than buying shares or selling naked calls / puts
for example tony from tastytrade, his entire retirement account is almost exclusively spreads - he argues that it is the most efficient way to use capital, with the best rate of return, and best probability of profit

>>51308250
I like those odds. well done annon

>>51308091
Does it? People gonna drive less because banks can't loan as much to each other? People not going to buy food as much? Demand isn't really affected by interest rates. Maybe for housing and cars being financed. Bit a lot of houses were purchased with full cash.

>>51308244
It is the "safe" way of doing things, but by the time you succeed you are all old and wrinkly and need viagra and shit. I also see a lot of people who are old going back into the workforce because they need the health insurance, something you could do without when you are younger. So functionally speaking, there is no escape from wage slavery actually.

>>51308228
>just buying oil/gas while everyone forgot that SPR is subsidizing oil prices right now

I am doing this as my second play- hurts right now but we will see it shoot back up

>>51308181
>Just got a full-time
Congrats but get a better job. $2400 a month is trash poverty tier.

>Fed Chair Jay Powell’s public pledge to reduce inflation even if it increases unemployment appears to have put the central bank on a path to raise interest rates by 0.75 percentage point rather than 0.50 point this month.

>>51308244
Nooooooooo just buy meme stocks and crypto shilled on plebbit and biz!!! Reeeee!!!!

today is my make or break day. I'm jacked to the tits.

Yen is about to smash through 145

>>51308343
>there is no inbetween
>>51308352
you have to go back

I genuinely want BBBY to go to $0.

>>51308413
I genuinely want it to go to 250$ and then zero and make money both ways.

>>51307066
>if X increases 50% above y limit sell only if it drops back to y+50% else let it ride?
I'm not sure if I get it but you set your stop loss at a lower price than the current, you can't preemptively set it higher than the actual price since it makes not sense
let's assume:
>set buy limit: 1 AAPL @ $100 with $90 stop loss
>AAPL pumps to $160
>set stop loss to $150

you can't do:
>buy AAPL @ $100
>set stop loss @ $150

>>51306939
Stop Buy and Stop Sell orders are the sophisticated trader's tools.

Waiting for soxl to go back down to 10 or maybe even 9 before I buy again

>Blackrock CEO says WfH is contributing to inflation
>Bringing everyone back to office immediately will slow down inflation
Boomers are irate and will say anything to make peoples life as insufferable as theirs.

It's going to be another one of those violent crab days when mr crab jerks us around from +1% to -1% isn't it

How are we feeling today, SIGA sissies?

>>51308368
and you have to go back to africa

>>51308413
I just saw their CFO did a swan dive from the 13th floor of some office building the other day. You'll probably see their stock price mimic the same kind of flight pattern.

>>51308490
>Blackcock CEO assblasted that a lot of office buildings they own are no longer necessary to be leased with retarded contracts so they're losing money hand over fist
>They cry out as they strike you and demand people go back to the office so they stop losing money while blaming inflation for retarded business practices that only raise overhead costs and lower employee morale
KEK!

>>51308413
I told my boomer mom about it and she said why would you trust a jew named cohen. Thanks mom, saved me a loss.

>>51304533
Qrd, whats a margin call?

I just want to thank god for this INTC buying opportunity. I will mold myself in his image and accumulate shares in these trying times for the economic safety net they will provide my family down the line.

>>51308574
you gambled with leverage or money you didn't have and now you owe money

>>51304533
So these commies are capping prices, and putting the energy companies into bankruptcy, then the states going to come in and take control over the energy and basically they're completely fucked.

>>51308516
don't give me hope

OH N-

If I am lightly bullish over the next 24 months and want to employ a covered call strategy assuming the bottom wont be in for several months, why does purchasing 100 shares of the underlying and selling calls against them out perform calendar spreads/pmcc? Ive collected some data over the last 3-4 years using paper trading and traditional cc outperformed both in times of high growth

>>51308659
Wow a whole 75bps when inflation is double digits. This is all a bunch of malarkey, the pivot is coming make no mistake about it.

>>51308659
we told you not to get HOOKED
and you may be HOOKED

I fucking love Jerome Powell and this retarded administration. It's a once in a decade opportunity to buy all the stocks and ETFs you want at great entry points.

>>51307066
set a price notification to get pushed a notification/text for when the stock reaches +50%, then manually go set a stop limit sell

you can find a way to automate this with IIoT. I considered something similar except I prefer to do it manually right now so I can first see what the movement is like (if it's accelerating up then I don't want to set a stop limit that can possibly get triggered by a single big red dildo).

>>51308686
Oh i forgot to add I entered the positions as weeklies and let all run to expiration reentering similar positions if assigned
All calls were sold 1 standard dev above strike/entry

Oh look they're selling off oil again

>>51308659
mortgages going for 7% already, market and inflation will cool down eveb with current rates

>>51308699
>This is all a bunch of malarkey
>the pivot is coming make no mistake about it
oh you ignorant double dumb fuck nigger

>>51308490
What a load of shit. WFH raised personal savings rates, which is disinflationary.

>>51308749
new mortgage demand is already at historic lows. if they keep raising the rates, plus with the delayed reaction of the housing market to previous rate hikes, I think we might see some more actual pullback here soon

>>51308743
good, i dont want oil to moon cuase thats exactly what happen right before the 2008 crash

>>>/pol/394232364

>>51307163
Europe has been taken over by commies, you are the next American pig.
Since you are my friend, I will kill you for free.
Source: I'm European

>>51308516
>>51308657
Tedros is giving a press conference on covid and monkepox right now
>https://twitter.com/WHO/status/1567501413802201089
Please pump my SIGA bags Tedros

>>51308760
>t. dog faced pony soldier

I work for a consulting firm, not saying which one, assume it’s big four if you wish. Right now we are telling our clients a few things in preparation for a prolonged recession.

>1.) If you must layoff, we recommend prioritizing marketing and ESG.
Way too many marketing positions were created because it filled a lot of internal DEI quotas for clients. Your data analysts are largely safe, but non-stem marketing positions are wasteful and make-work positions.
We don’t tell our clients this, but ESG is maybe 5-10% actual investing, and the rest is marketing. Most of your company resources used for ESG is just promoting ESG.
>2.) If you must layoff, we recommend prioritizing in-person positions.
We’ve found that, on average, employees want approximately $5-10k higher salary for jobs that require a commute. Remote positions will be better off in the future because of a potential energy crisis. Everyone saves money and there is an ESG incentive to go remote, as well.
>3.) Tech bubble has still not popped.
We are still seeing venture capitalists investing in scammy companies promoting “Web3” and that is a huge indicator that any bottom we’ve seen in tech is not actually the bottom.
Because we still see a bubble, we’re actually recommending that clients get rid of AI in any marketing analytics. Reason being? Research shows that you use MORE resources using AI in analytics. You’re better off just paying remote analysts to go through the data themselves.

>>51308843
Do you use cocaine? What are you a junkie? You ain't black! You wanna do a push up contest?

>>51308749
My dad got his first house in the 80s with like 12% interest rate or something crazy like that. we've still got a LOT higher to go

>oilchuds

kek

>>51308844
People need a consulting company to tell them that?

>>51308844
>your slop, sir

>>51305149
Plz explain

>>51308844
I'll never get over how that guy looks when pouring that shit out for that faggot filming it like "you retards will pay for anything wont you"

>>51308844
Legitimate alpha posting? On my /smg/? It's apparently more likely than I thought.

>>51308836
nothing he can say can overcome this graph
we need kids to spread it in schools

>>51308862
>selloff exactly at 9
>daily
Weird

>>51308844
I feel bad for employees that are forced into unions often against their best interests, most of them don't want to go on strike but they have to.

name the chart

>>51308869
i mean, why would you pay somebody to do this? I could just send my friend over your house, you just give him a dozen of those hipster IPAs and he'd do this for free.

Buy intel

>>51308878
stop being a gullible retard

>>51308885
https://theriver953.com/MONKEYPOOP-case-confirmed-at-sherando-high-school/
>the person was in school while infectious

>>51308889
Stop noticing patterns

>>51308904
is that the dollar yuan?

dubs and s&p500 drops 99% today

>>51308904
nat gas

ONE
NOTHING WRONG WITH ME

>>51307778
The most economically sound decision you can make as a European right now is to get the fuck out of Europe

lors onions on GSAT? they're announcing something at the apple event today

The market is about to open. I KNOW WHAT IS COMING

>>51308844
>tfw Data Analyst/BI Developer
I'm safe then. If I get fired maybe I'll make a reusable fancy excel dashboard/portfolio for anons here.

* BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG

>>51308966
what does it do

>>51308965
GME MOAS and SPY meltup at the same time?

OH GOD IT'S HAPPENING

>>51308932
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Dont ask a pretty girl to be your wife
In my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

>>51304496
Should I keep buying the oil dip?
I think oil will stay high for years to come because emerging markets will start develop. Plus investment in the industry has been below the required amount for years.

>>51308857
Look, fat. America never had, even during the Civil War and then my leg hairs turned light in the sun.

market right now

NOOOOOOO THE HECKIN STOCKERINOS ARE GOING DOWN

Lmao amc
That ape really did a lot

AEVA

>>51309018
the american gentleman

please no please no please no please no

>>51308998
>Should I keep buying the oil dip?
>I think oil will stay high for years to come because emerging markets will start develop. Plus investment in the industry has been below the required amount for years.

>>51309052
t. 100% all world ETF investor

>>51308998
nobody needs oil in a world wide recession sweaty

>>51309018
whats the story here wtf

>next resistance around 3670

>>51309072
SOMEONE GET THE SAUDIS ON THE PHONE RIGHT FUCKING NOW

>S&P green candling
you vill close red and you vill like eet

SPY..... go down now.....

ooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It's our win, Bobo.

>>51308934
I'm 8k in minus, what's 3%?
Oil is the only profitable shit I have in my portofolio right now.
>>51308935
I for one, think I would fit better in a Mad Max society than the current one.

I just want bobo do die

Why is it PUMPINGGGGGGGGGGG?

These Hebrew markets are very sus lately

Fuck, I'm bagholding worthless oil now

>>51309131
as a fellow eternal mumu benchod im gonna have to ask you to zoom out

>red futes
>green open
I've seen this episode before I know how this ends

>>51308932
Fuck this bitch

>>51308999
poor kids are just as smart and just as talented as white kids

>they're waking up

>>51308844
>2.) If you must layoff, we recommend prioritizing in-person positions.
We’ve found that, on average, employees want approximately $5-10k higher salary for jobs that require a commute. Remote positions will be better off in the future because of a potential energy crisis. Everyone saves money and there is an ESG incentive to go remote, as well.

This is kind of bullshit in a different way. The first thing companies do to reduce headcount is reqiure all remote employees to come back to the office. HR: Oh no, can't make it to the office? Boo hoo. Guess we'll just have to shitcan you with no UI, no severance, nothing. ITS THE EASIEST AND MOST RISK FREE WAY OF CUTTING HEADCOUNT.

Damn, I can see why McKinsey, BCG, etc, get paid the big bucks. Get paid $5k / week retainers for consultants to give them the worst possible advice.

>>51309146
No.

AAAAAAAAAA STOP FRACKING BUYING!!!! MY HECKING PUTS!!!!!!!!!!!

>>51308865
Most of the solutions I make for clients are all in books or free online. They follow a very specific formula based on each clients' situation. That's why case interviews are so important. Case scenarios are so well documented and rarely do you have a client whose situation is so unique that you have to burn the midnight oil to solve their problem.

That's why you want chads as consultants. If I wasn't consulting, I'd be working on wall street cold calling for commissions. I'm basically selling solutions that are openly available online and acting as if I lost sleep trying to solve their problem lol.

>>51308966
>BI Developer
What BI tools are you using?

Shoutout to the guy that has been shilling NET, I think our time has finally cummed

>>51309187
VIX PULL UP

bulls are not allowed to cum

20 minutes until the dump begins

>>51309224
what happens then?

>>51309223

>>51304496
The fact he is old and probably just have some results and that age is quite ironic.

>>51309242

Note to self: market usually rallies before fed speaks even if everyone knows it's going to be bad news

>>51309239

>>51309250
that's the rub, does it rally when they speak or before? You can't set your watch by it

>>51309268
>>51309268
>>51309268
NEW
>>51309268
>>51309268
>>51309268
NEW

I'M FUCKING GREEN

>>51309281
not for long sweety, the market will completely reverse before the day is over or tomorrow. such is life in clownworld market

>>51308844
>webm
What is going on here?
>layoff
You know they will fire the most useful people, the soul on the bottom floor and leave the bosses to loot the company
>layoff remote workers
Good idea, but all the remote workers are our bosses on vacation. So we fired the cleaning staff, the workers can clean after themselves.
>tech bubble still has not popped
What happens when it does?
NFTs are dead, Crypto is dying and Facebook Meta will never be relevant.

>>51309052
So Warren Buffett is gambling money now? Lol

>>51309443
yes.

>>51309052
>>51309627
You seem like a smart and educated individual, what are you invested in if I may ask?

>>51310587
cash and golden bars.

>>51310706
Cash is worthless, I rather own guns and food, when society collapses, the meek shall inherit the earth

PRTY bros, we cool?