/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>50065416
I've done it, my dick hurt

>>50065416
Stop talking and start doing

Might as well fuck dirt at that point at least the worms in the soil would line your cock

>>50065416
Its uncomfortable, the coldness of the wussy makes it almost impossible to maintain a hard on tbe friction also makes it uncomfortable and if the hole in the melon is cut too small you are basically hurting yourself on the rind. Not to mention the constant fear of getting a wussy seed stuck in your dick hole.

>>50065464
you say that yet till use the word wussy instead of watermelon

>>50065464
You need to heat up the hole first, you get more liquid and it feels warm, I'm an incel so I can't confirm that it feels like a real vagina but it does feel better than normal masturbation

>>50065479
Its not the platonic ideal of a pussy, its a crude manmade one that is used as one in this instance.

>>50065513
It seems easier to just make a fleshlight out of starch

There is seed stuck in my peehole now. Not the good kind. Please advise

>>50065611
or pay 60 bucks for a Fleshlight / Tenga?

I've fucked a homemade fleshlight.
It was quite alright, but you need lube.

>>50065416
unironically tried it once
it was not enjoyable

>>50065688
I made my own Fleshlight instead that was probably easier than making it out of starch. All you need is
>A latex glove
>Two sponges
>A cup
You sandwich the glove between the sponges and stuff them into the cup then wrap it around the edges of the cup. Once you lube it up it feels like the real thing.

>>50065805
Sounds quite bullish I will give it a try.

>>50065416
theres an old arab saying
the woman is for making babies
the boy is for pleasure
the melon is for ecstacy

>i am unironically contemplating buying a fleshlight

>>50065416
>There's no way that feels like anything other than shoving your dick in a melon right?
That's literally how normal sex feels like, you pathetic virgin.

>>50065936
I have considered multiple times on buying one of those 20 lbs of pusy and ass

>>50065915
Lmaooo this made me laugh so hard. I can imagine some towelhead in a temple saying this trying to act intelligent and interesting

>>50065951
The only problem with those is they don't seem very realistic. I'm not sure if you can buy realistic feeling synthetic breasts yet. I haven't held a women's waist in 8 years...

until sex toys start giving you blowjobs nothing beats your hand and anyone saying otherwise is just brainwashing themselves into feeling "enhanced pleasure" like asmr fags pretending noises give them hand free orgasms, that's called premature ejaculation and its a medical issue

>>50065987
Just fuck a hooker bro. But I would hardly call it enjoyable. It's fun to grab/smack her ass, do her doggy but hookers are never really into it so...

>>50065936
Shit feels really good but is pain to clean

I tried to fuck one of these when I was a lad and it felt like nothing

>>50065416
I tried it with an orange once and it just felt like it was good for the skin. Made it look great for a few days desu.

>>50065660
Should have used a plug.

>>50065416
Ive tried to fuck one of these fuckers, larger than in the picture. You have to microwave these fucks, so when it finally cooled down a bit, I made a hole in it, tried to fuck it, but it burned my dick. You can still see the remains of the burn on my tip. Still ate it after cooling my dick

>>50066148
I am angry that you would do anything but eat these little knapsacks from heaven.

>>50066259
yes with chili sauce !! do u agree?

I fucked a hole in a tree once, it is pretty wooden

>>50066268
I’ve only had them twice, but I’ll try them with chili sauce next time.