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50047750 No.50047750 [Reply] [Original]

CALLING ALL WAGIES. If you're anything like me, five seconds in a wagie cagie makes you want to kys. Thankfully, there is a way out - currently I make 24$ an hour with zero experience, and I work from home. I do two hours of work a day, and get paid for eight. Here's how:
>linkedin
Setup a LinkedIn. Take a profile picture. Use portrait mode on your phone, wear a dress shirt. Don't try to look serious, you will just look like an edgy retard - casually smile. For your description, everybody likes to write a very gay summation of their life story and aspirations. You will write your skills in a list. Next, send connection requests EN MASSE to random people. You are simply trying to make your profile look more legitimate via a high number of connections.
>Your resume
This is where things get epic. Get a resume template off of google drive, and start filling out your information. Be honest about education and certifications, but here is our ace up our sleeve : lie about work experience and skills. I don't mean slightly exaggerate, I mean COMPLETELY lie. Say you worked for companies that have since closed, or foreign companies. Some fake job titles that you can probably BS talking about : data entry specialist, onboarding specialist, employee coordinator, HR coordinator. Keep the appearance of your resume simple, employers think that fancy resumes are a massive cope (and they are).
>Applying
Start a job search on LinkedIn. The filters you will use are: Location : remote, LinkedIn Easy Apply enabled. With LinkedIn easy apply, each application should take between 10 seconds and 2 minutes. For the search, put keywords in like "data entry" or "human resources" and apply to everything that shows up. I was able to apply to 3000 jobs within 2 weeks like this, and that was only a few hours a day. When you're asked "how many years of experience do you have in X" just put 3

>> No.50047793

>Interviewing
When I was searching for a job with this strategy, I would average 5 calls a day asking to schedule an interview. I don’t have many tips about interviewing, a lot of it is going to depend on you being handsome / charismatic in order to woo some HR roastie. Just make sure you have a memorized story about your pretend work experience, mainly about your job duties.
>What about the heckin background check?
I was officially offered six jobs with only two weeks of effort. Four of them background checked me, and none of them mentioned my nonexistent work history. That being said, DO NOT apply to government jobs. DO NOT lie to the government, they will immediately find out you are lying.

>> No.50047796

>I was able to apply to 3000 jobs within 2 weeks like this
wow impressive.
how many offers did you get again?

>> No.50047834

>>50047793
Thats cool, but. Should i buy bitcoin now?

>> No.50047918

>>50047750
saved, thanks. I have to ask............


do you work overseas? becase for me, its leaving america or nothing. I'm only gonna "ascend" to WFH if my "home" is some studio apartment in the middle of this shitty boomer redlight district beach town in thailand k? there's no "luxury" in wfh if you're still stuck in the mongrelized american hellscape.

but thanks for your high effort post. i screenshot some other anons high effort post and ill get the ball rolling with this info at some point when ive saved enough money doing my monkeyhouse job

>> No.50047940

>>50047796
6 officially. Reminder that each application was 2 minutes tops of effort, but usually less than 30 seconds. Like I said, this was only a few hours a day for two weeks. The goal is to cast as wide of a net as possible, and put minimal effort in to each application. Eventually someone will see your resume and like it. I currently get paid to play vidya for most of my day.

>> No.50048032

>>50047918
I do not work overseas, I believe that it is possible, but it is more complicated. If you want to escape the American hellscape, I recommend moving to the country and still WFH. That's just what I would do, though. Good luck.

>> No.50048175

>>50047750
>>Your resume
>This is where things get epic
I laughed out loud while reading this for some reason, thanks anon

>> No.50048272

>be me
>Be an employer
>See an obviously faked resume of some desperate retard
>This is where things get epic
>Send him a job offer worded so I legally don't have to pay him
>He works for a month on some shit I was too lazy to outsource, he thought he was so smart and excited he didn't even read it
>Fire him without paying
>He is too poor to sue me and couldn't anyway
>Send a blacklist request so he is automatically trashed in any real company

>> No.50048408

>>50048272
Kike

>>50047750
I’m finishing my degree this year and looking to WFH but stay in my 3rd world country to take advantage of being paid in GBP. You said to move to the country and WFH there? I might as well go work in person if I were to move to the UK

>> No.50048416

>>50048272
fucking kek, I doubt this would ever happen though.

>> No.50048490

>>50048408
The main issue with an in person job is that you will spend 20% of your day actually working, and 80% of your day trying to look busy so your boss doesn't fire you. (There isn't a single white collar job that ACTUALLY has 8 hours of work a day, 5 days a week). When you WFH, that 80% can be spent playing vidya, or literally doing anything else.

>> No.50048493
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50048493

>>50048272
Stupid boomer kill yourself you lonely old fuck

>> No.50049586

>>50048490
How does the world function with such little work being done. In STEM they rape us to get assignments finished without any time, then the workplace is like a BA in basket weaving

>> No.50050128
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50050128

>>50049586
You're just a well educated slave anon

>> No.50050503

>>50047834
Fuck off. This board was un-fathomlessly better when posts like OPs were the norm, and I’m not talking about the remote work subject either, considering it’s relatively new widespread adoption post-C19.

>> No.50050539

>>50047750
Would this work for Indeed? I don't want to have to use LinkedIn

>> No.50050901

>>50050539
If Indeed has something similar to LinkedIn easy apply, then yes. With easy apply you can finish an application in 20 seconds. I was able to apply to 3000 jobs using this in just two weeks

>> No.50051722

Based thread. Needs more depth for how to fake shit but still good intentions OP.