[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

View post   
File: 1.00 MB, 1080x1080, F9A836F8-ECE1-4EE9-A050-72B94500BD4A.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28194947 No.28194947 [Reply] [Original]

January 17th
It’s a brisk day in Kanpur. Tuk tuks barrel down crowded and poorly maintained freeways as passers-by are deafened by a chorus of honking horns. Industrial waste gushes into the Ganges with the force of a trillion clenching Calcuttan colons. Though little is seen, much is heard through the hellishly opaque air. Awoken by the ruckus is Prakesh Vindetumal. He’s a regular on /biz/, and his /biz/ness is shilling and pumping random shitcoins to unwitting anons, only to dump his meager bags on them after a 2x. He stumbles upon a token called Rubic. After doing research, however, he is put off - the dev team is all white. “Not my people, maadarchods.” He didnt understand what an “anooneymized desk” was, and he certainly didn’t want to make these honkeys any money by shilling their token.
Prakesh scrolls on, and the green cube is forgotten.

>> No.28195090
File: 1.25 MB, 972x7781, 97B6AE22-E262-43BD-83EF-F0500DE1700D.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28195090

February 6th
Prakesh returns to /biz/ after a much-needed sabbatical to the holy Ganges. Crusted shit and scabbed blood of a former neighbor coagulates his hair into a stinking, matted mess. “Vishnu be praise.” He returns to /biz/, unprepared for what he was about to see.
Rubic had skyrocketed to 75 cents without him. The rage Prakesh felt this day was beyond the scope of the english language. The anus and birth canal of every goat in a 10km radius was prolapsed beyond recognition, thanks to a 10 hour spree of furious hate-fucking from the peeved penor of Prakesh Vindetumal. In this fantastical financial fuck-up, he truly paid homage to the passage from the Bhagavad Pajeeta, where Shiva appears with eight bags full of worthless shitcoins, saying, “I am become debt, destroyer of folios.”
To this day, Prakesh can be found in any Rubic thread, unleashing a torrent of stinking brown FUD of his own creation, from photoshopped fiverr pages to seething copypastas, praying to Vishnu for a lower entry price. Legend has it that replying to his insultingly obvious bait imparts a stench of curry on your motherboard that will never go away.
Pic related are just some of the fruits of Prakesh’s labor. Seller beware!

>> No.28195675

>>28194947
Based

>> No.28195720

>>28195090
Based

>> No.28195815

>>28194947
>>28195090
Dangerously Based.

>> No.28195857

>>28194947
kek, well played anon

>> No.28195886

>>28194947
>>28195090
nice

>> No.28195960

>>28194947
based /lit/ retard

>> No.28196413
File: 109 KB, 968x1050, 4019E147-5A78-490E-8858-70579391C5C6.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28196413

>>28195675
>>28195720
>>28195815
>>28195857
>>28195886
>>28195960
Damn, I forgot to mention - this is all based on a very true story.

>> No.28196453

>>28196413
The man who saved Rubic.

>> No.28196931
File: 66 KB, 735x722, 1611265158882.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28196931

>>28194947
>>28195090
based and currypilled

>> No.28197261
File: 223 KB, 500x625, 1612286551384.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28197261

Let it be known, my brothers, that we will rise from these ashes, and when we do, we will extinguish every last one of our enemies, once and for all.
Our gains will be so obscenely huge that those who fudded against us will turn pink with rage.
They WILL rope, they WILL dilate.
One day we will awaken to the blood curdling anguished screams of normies and nocoiners, they will rip out their own eyes in horror as they cower beneath the green monoliths that have descended upon their homes.
And we will know, our time has come.
Stare death in the eye and desensitise yourselves to violence, for you will all be required to take up arms and do the needful on the day of reckoning, never again will they ridicule us, never again will they fud /ourcoin/

>> No.28197270

>>28195090
>Bhagavad Pajeeta
I'm dying anon.
Alright, never selling

>> No.28198083

bumping so this stays on biz rest of the day

>> No.28198354

>>28198083
I appreciate it, rubichad. I pride myself on giving real accounts of people all over the world.

>> No.28198521

deserved bump

>> No.28198627

>>28195090
>I am become debt, destroyer of folios
kek
very good anon, rubic has the most based holders

>> No.28198828

Bump, that was great!

>> No.28198904

>>28198354
its my pleasure, cant wait for chapter 2

>> No.28199971

>>28198354
I would consider donating to a novella.

>> No.28200068

>>28194947
bump

>> No.28200162
File: 278 KB, 1200x800, 1611717540539.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
28200162

>>28197261

>> No.28200212

>>28194947
>>28195090
I was never going to buy this coin, truly. I will now.

>> No.28200442

Cope activate

>> No.28200824

>>28194947
cant fool me, I know rubic was a pajeet scam once they started saying "rubic is cubic". only an indian would utter a phrase like that in english.

>> No.28201513

Based, stay cubic

>> No.28201781

>>28194947
i'm dying KEK

>> No.28203059

>>28197270
just realised that

>> No.28204265

Funny but kinda ironic saying this about Rubic, the most obviously pajeer shilled coin on /biz since the age of PNK (and that one was at least self aware ironic pajeet shilling)

>> No.28204765

>>28195090
>Bhagavad Pajeeta, where Shiva appears with eight bags full of worthless shitcoins, saying, “I am become debt, destroyer of folios.”
KEK