/biz/ - Business & Finance

Sometimes I feel guilty with how little work I get done. As long as I sit in on all my meetings I’m fine. I usually procrastinate my workload until Sunday night.

based and likeminded

I love to get work done on my bike. Bluetooth headset is so clutch.

>>27599959
Never been paid more to do less, but my company has been whining about how hard the times are now, so I think they're gonna try to get out giving us raises. They already took away bonuses last year. Still, my days are peaceful.

>>27599959
Doing fuck all as usual

I avoid work as much as possible during the day, but as a result, might pick up the laptop and do a half hour of work at random times like 8 pm or 4 am, but I don’t mind that at all, it’s a good trade off. I hope we never go back.

WFH really is the Chad way of doing things, NEET liftstyle with a salary that let's you afford more than tendies.

>>27599959
I work from but have a ton of work that i should be doing now

I was supposed to start work almost an hour ago and I’m still in bed. Really helps console a man on any losses from trading
>be me
>work from home
>do case work, so I can get all my work done at the end of the day if I want, meaning I can even sleep in as long as Skype says I am logged in

I don't even work, I'm just waiting for LINK to moon and I can cash out after years of loyalty. I am quite comfy watching eth go up too, but I'm only in ETH to cash out monthly rent until my LINKies hit goatath. Why am I telling you this? To shit your thread up you dumb fuckin' wagies.

Hello friend
Data Analyst here
Things have been a bit crazy due to the board of directors meeting coming up, which has caused me to have to put 2-3 hours of work in a day over the last week instead of 0.5-1 hour.
Torture!

I'm an office cuck. The HR whale just sent this beauty out. Enjoy your comfy WFH life
>Anon, you haven't given anyone kudos!!

>>27599999
>>27600000

>>27601812

>Leave really snarky/bullying messages towards the HR woman in the kudos cup

I always had a deep disdain for workplaces that run the place like a kindergarten

>>27599959
More like hardly working amarite guise?

>wake up 5 min before work starts
>log in to stand up meeting in jammies
>check out market while sipping coffee
>shitpost here with you faggots while planning the day's trades
>do maybe an hour of work in a day
>quickie with gf at lunch time

yeah this is the life

>>27601812
I wish I had the time right now to make this into a seething wojak meme
>Put it in the cup, wagie

>>27600212
The key for me is starting work a little early and getting through my emails (usually about 30) by about 8:30. Mostly I just “mark as read” the spam and unimportant ones. By about 9 all real work is done and I reply to coworkers messages and emails promptly but aside from that watch Netflix.

>>27601694
The horror. You’ll make it fren.

>>27601812
My company doesn’t even have HR. It’s astonishing someone gets paid to do that, yet our comfy Wfh lifestyles come under scrutiny.

A question. In December I received a 12% raise and a $2000 bonus. On Friday my CEO gave me a 20% bonus. He said it was because he saw my work as the “future of the company”, and wanted “to show we value your work”. Does anyone have any idea why he gave me two substantial raises within 2 months?

>>27602730
>20% bonus
I meant to say raise

Good morning fellow chads, today I made some bacon, eggs and hash browns for breakfast while on a meeting. Sitting into a conference call and browsing now, have another right after this for 2 hours during which I may play some Monster Hunter. Last two weeks I spent whole days looking at Gamestop charts and made it out with a comfy $50k profit.

>>27601812
god damn I would not be able to handle that shit lmao. HR is for shit like co ordinating benefits & getting out of sexual harassment lawsuits and that is absolutely it.

>>27599959
I have a presentation later today. I'm autism social anxiety so I am currently shitting my guts out. Ready to off myself. It never gets easier.

>>27603441
I hate giving presentation too, fren. I had one on Monday and it went off without a hitch. You'll do great!

Who /government/ here?
I'm convinced politicians hire developers as some sort of money laundering scheme. I've done literally nothing for about the past year. My boss asked me to write a script to scrape some data but it took about five minutes and I think he just asked me to do it because he knew I was bored.

>>27603738
Thanks fren.

>>27603441
No one will remember your presentation by this time next week if that helps.

I don’t understand you people. What the fuck do you give as a product? Do you just work a bullshit job? I basically can’t leave my desk without missing a phone call and I have daily morning and afternoon team meetings.

>>27603826
Yeah I know. Its all in my head anyway

Tips for doing the least amount of work but getting the most amount of praise from Mr sheckleburg??

I start my wfh job next week, answering phones for a charity. Once I memorise the scripts I was thinking of playing WoW or something while I'm working

I've gotten so used to "working from home" I think I'll quit my real job once they force me to go back.

I've gotten so used to "working" from home I think I'll quit my real job once (((they))) force me to come back.

>>27603938
I make money for my CEO who does 15 minutes of work a day and lives a comfy life. He pays me to do the 30-60 minutes of work he would otherwise have to do and otherwise interrupt his comfy life. So long as he does not have to do the work, all is good.

>>27604018
Whatever platform you use to show activity (google hangouts, Skype, Slack), Figure out how to keep it always showing you are online. Log in 30 minutes before everyone else so when they log on it shows you there (I do this, but actually work those 30 minutes and leave early).

I just beginning my /wfh/ life but it seems like it will take a while as im very new to stocks and my initial investment is very small. Any general tips?

>>27604018
We had a new hire (insurance industry) who knows how to play the game.
Within her first week, she identified a small but important change we could make to save space on our servers and presented it to the team at large (cc'ing the VP). This focused the attention on her. Next, she created a chat group for remote social activity.
What I'm saying is, after you learn your script, take the time to see what could be improved even minor and present it without asking people to change (or they'll assume you're arrogant). After this is done you will have an image of a good employee, just project energy every time you have a meeting and they'll love you.

>>27603786
genuine kek and based.

>>27601812
Here is some more of my office cuck life. Every week we do a life planner where everyone shares a word of the week that describes how your week went. Then you share your work/home/spiritual goals for that week. Then you share what you are grateful for. After that we do a team building exercise like image attached.
We do this every week without fail and it takes a whole hour.

I know this gets asked every thread but I’m struggling to become a wfh chad: what do you guys do? Degree?
I have a mechanical engineering degree and cannot find any wfh jobs. I’m considering teaching myself some software shit and/or getting certs.

>>27603786
I thought it was just me.

Also /government/. I do basically nothing. I HAVE work, but it's brain-dead easy for any reasonably good dev. First job out of school. Need to find something better once we're back at the office.

>>27605025
Physics degree, was a lab rat for a year. No money or jobs in the sector so I bailed. Focused on data science in my own time and found a data analyst position. Permanent job + 10k raise after 6 months.

>>27605175
btw it was a a master in physics.

>>27603938
Join some daily Teams meetings, answer a few emails and have maybe 5 hours a week worth of calls with clients who usually don't even understand the product we sell them which means I don't even have to answer any questions. The rest of the time is spent on biz.

>>27602730
alright, ill bite. what line of work are you in?

>>27605025
I remember you bro. If you don't care what the job is, Customer service jobs are often WFH. Other than that lots of small companies are hiring for them, you just need to filter for remote location. You'll find the comfy job fren,

>>27605175
Nice work fren. Did you get any certs or just work through some tutorials? SQL?
I’m no genius but I did a good amount of data analysis in school, so I feel like this path could be viable. I see some high paying positions online

>>27599959
I worked at Lowe’s till yesterday. I walked out in tears due to being yelled at in front of my team.
I need to change.

>>27604552
Remove emotion from your investment decisions and only invest what you can afford to lose.

>>27605466
The work is really simple, you need to be good with stats and machine learning that's it.
No certs, only sk-learn tutorials (not even neural networks) and some kaggle. What helped me is a personal project on github, anything to prove you can do some project on your own and apply analysis.
When you apply, do it online on their shitty platform and then find the recruiting manager or someone in the team on linkedin and email them. This is the only way I found interviews.

>>27599959
>Wake up at 7am
>do all my work for the day from 7-9:30am
>attend meeting from 9:30-10am
>drip feed completed morning work throughout the day
>prison floor work out at 11-12pm by my desk
>smoke half a joint and cook myself lunch
>Lay in my bed from 2-3pm
>Play PS4 from 3-5pm while answering emails and attending a meeting where webcams are never required

I also made 5k last night from Ethereum and OMG pumps. It almost feels too easy. Work From Home is truly elite.

>>27605536
If you don't have any higher education, start there.

If that's not an option for you because of financial reasons and you're not willing to take on any debt (which is what I did, don't regret it at all), get some certifications. If you're a tech guy, start with CompTIA or AWS certifications. Use those credentials to apply for better jobs. If not tech, then look into other certifications or possibly an associate's/technical degree. Or trade school.

You have options. I've been there. Stormed out of a fast food job while struggling to pay rent in college. We're all gonna make it.

I’m a mortician looking for a career change but nothing transfers.
I desperately want a WFH job.

Not because I want to be lazy but because driving into the office and sitting here all day is going to be the death of me.

I should have gotten my compsci degree

>>27605809
btw this was an office job, corona hit after 2 weeks and I've been wfh since early 2020.

>>27601812
>>27604987
lmao this is pathetic

>>27605149
I thought my office was just particularly dysfunctional but I've heard from other anons that this is surprisingly common. I think I was hired basically as a meme as part some bullshit "technology initiative", the guy that took over this trashfire department (who btw is unironically Soros funded lol) just wants to say "we brought in modern python developers" and that sounds like a High Tech Solution as a bullet on a powerpoint slide but nobody actually had any plan for what I was supposed to do. The only thing of value we really did was make a prototype of a project he could show off to the legislature when he needed more funding. The rest of my time has been working on office software that nobody ever implemented and occasionally bullshit scripting tasks that my boss could have done. Since COVID it's like they literally forgot we exist and I'm basically just collecting neetbux.

>>27599959
it's not a loss if you don't sell
t. """"""down"""""" $800

My yearly raise just got approved, should be 5% minimum,cheers gents!
I'm also selling some PTO soon since I'm almost at my accrual limit. I need to get better at using it

>>27599959
I’ve been WFH for almost a year and my productivity is about 40% of what it was in the office, and I have no travel
time. Downside is I rarely leave my apartment except to get groceries or go for a run/gym. Pretty based existence if
you ask me. Might move home though to avoid enriching the jew landlord who owns this building.

>>27604987
I just vomited.

>>27605385
I do sourcing for an e-commerce company. We've never done better because everyone is buying our shit online. Best part is I'm getting paid to learn how to do this on my own.

>>27603786
>>27605149
GovernmentCHAD here. Feels good being paid to trade stonks and browse /biz/ all day.

>>27603786
>>27606667
How do I get a comfy government job? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.

>>27605809
Based. My work experience so far has required me to learn everything on my own so I think I could handle it. >>27603786
What’s your background? I often see people mention how comfy their gov dev job is. I didn’t study compsci but if I self teach some software eng stuff I think I could get a job with my BSME

>>27606185
Perfect opportunity to work for yourself, King.
You're already in and able to get knowledge about internal processed. You can easily develop some SaaS bullshit to sell to any government branch.
If this is not your goal, use the time to progress your skills either for a job or for yourself.

>t. guitar learner

>>27599959
I WFH but browse this shithole for like 70% of the day.

bros it's so comfy and I don't want to go back when this is all over.

>doing overtime whenever I want at £480/day
>staying in bed with laptop until 10am
>watching kinos while doing piss easy work
>saving around £2.2k/month

I'd like some office time but I never want to go back to 5 days.

>>27603786
>>27606667
Can you government Chads help a fren out? I'm a software developer who works from home but I actually have to work a lot to do my job. I put in an application on the USA Jobs site but is there a way I can meet government workers to get some eyes on my application?

>>27606185
I also thought it was just me. I'm doing basically the same shit. Our whole thing is "revolutionizing the software solutions of [branch]" with new talent/young people. I've noticed now that I've been here a while that none of these projects ever get fucking finished and it's basically just a jobs program. I know it, my manager knows it, my team lead/product owner/scrum master knows it, and we're all just pretending that what we're doing provides any "value" whatsoever. It also feels like Neetbux for me.

I'd like to fool myself into thinking that I could find dev work elsewhere like a FAANG that actually matters but word on the street is most of those projects go nowhere too. Software is a meme.

>>27607115
It's never going back completely.

I like to send an email an hour after work hours to make it look like a wagie who can't stop

Also got a comfy 1k GBP bonus. WFH god checking in

>>27606787
>>27606667
go to usajobs website. just google it, you'll find it. full disclosure, they are hard to get because once you get one you're basically tenured, and there's a long application process. like for me it was: intent to hire -> tentative offer -> firm offer before I finally got in. you can see the usajobs leddit for more info (yes im a fag).

>>27607338
I'm not sure. for me it was a professor who knew a guy higher up in my [branch]. I have no advice in this regard other than apply fucking everywhere. we're always churning and hiring. alternatively, you could apply for a job with a defense contractor in your area. I work with alot of them, its the same shit for more money

>>27607624
Based, I’ll usually do the same after a day of /absolutelynothing/

>>27607673
I'm getting my bonus (£4k) at the end of this month. Easy money especially for a grad scheme

>>27607624
Based.

I use the Gmail "Send Later" function to send my emails throughout the day, including later at night. I write all my emails in the morning.

>>27607775
CB?

>>27599959
Honestly I got a new job and I hated my old job so I wasn't working very hard and now some of those tendencies have transferred over to this new gig and im terrified im gonna fuck it up cause its a dream job. Been working pretty well I just could def do more. Anyone got tips to increase wfh efficiency?

>>27607775
Getting my bonus in march

>>27603786
Government bro here. Before COVID, I'd regularly come into the office buzzed each morning, and I wasn't the only one. I also kept a flask of rum in my desk drawer and used it to spike Diet Cokes I bought from the vending machine. Thank you taxpayers!

I literally haven't done shit for like 6 months now. Most of my days are like this

>wake up at 9am
>check email
>go back to sleep
>wake up at 2pm and play video games/trade crypto
>say I worked 40 hours at the end of the week

I even got a pay raise at the end of last year for doing NOTHING.

>>27608073
Do as much work as possible in the first couple of hours without distractions so that the main tasks have been taken care of by 10-11am

>wake up at 10 AM
>do 2-3 hours of work total
>spend rest of time reading, watching shit, trading, working on my own projects
>take 2 hr naps during lunch time
>wake up, feel energised
>have a few puffs of weed to get me going
>have a quick fap
>end the day with some meetings and communicating with my coworkers to make it seem I've been doing work all day

The best part of my current job is that I joined the company during the start of corona when they had suspended issuing new access cards for the building and to this day I don't have one so they have no way of making me go to the office even if they wanted to.

>>27607745
>defense contractors
No homo, are there any subleddits for that? I definitely wanna learn more about the /comfy/ life.

Should just call this forum wage cuck and finance. I'd say only 5% or less even have a business here.

>>27603786
Yep, I'm here. Yesterday I attended a bunch of meetings via teams that I had no idea what was even being discussed but today I have literally nothing on my plate past the usual morning meeting. I've been in this position since July and still have no idea what's going on or what I'm responsible for. It's kind of stressful but I'm working hard on trying to relax and just remember that it's a huge pain in the ass to fire or discipline me, so I'll wait for someone to tell me to do something.

>>27599959
What do you guys do? Is it a low barrier to entry? Did you need to go to college? Did you get the job through networking?

>>27608352
desu your best bet is still the usajobs leddit or just google "defense contracting leddit". thats what I do when i need to know about something specific. aspies here that get mad about that can lick my nuts.

>>27608169
based

>>27607624
i do nothing during the week and then post updates to the team chat on saturday to look like I'm behind the mission 100%

>>27607745
>you could apply for a job with a defense contractor in your area. I work with alot of them, its the same shit for more money

This i am a defense contractor and I get paid an absurd amount for doing nothing. The main difference is that your job isn't guaranteed like the government, but you will earn so much that you can just toss it in crypto and retire early.

>>27604987
What kind of general business are you in? I am an accountant, and not even HR literally our finance managers tried to get us to make these images describing who we are. Like all these different things combined into a collage type thing. A few people (the suck ups) did it and even my senior manager complained that she hated it privately. I didnt do it and was vocal that I wasn't going to be wasting my time with that shit because we had so much else to do because we weren't hiring and I didnt look like a team player but was fucking worth it

My current workday (Big Data Consultancy):

8:30 - wake up
8:45 - breakfast and coffee
9:00 turn on work laptop, keep sipping coffee
10:30 - finish coffee
11:00 - check to see if anyone has brought up any work that urgently needs doing (all companies have furloughed everyone so there is nothing to do)
11:45 - go for a run, usually 5 or 6km
12:30 - tell boss i'm going for lunch
1:30 - come back check if there is anything to do (there isn't)
5:00 - call it a day, tell my boss i'll message him tomorrow


I GOT PAID £2440 FOR THIS. The game is too easy

>>27608556
I work quality for a pharma company. It requires a bachelors and good articulation. I didn't get it through networking, but it wasn't originally wfh.

>>27608311
Good point. Been making sure to be on late/send late emails if we are in a crunch cause it looks like I'm a good lil wagie

>>27608423
my business is getting rich on taxpayer dollars faggot

>>27608556
went to college for comp sci after suffering through years of fast food jobs and student loans to pay rent. now I wfh and scroll /biz/ and trade stocks/crypto. got here through networking, most of my professors liked me because I was sharp & worked hard unironically

Doctor here. Seeing patients all day. Only have five scheduled. Browsing and trading in the mean time. Also ripping ass constantly so my office smells like actual shit.

Just got a job with Red Cross calling people in corona isolation facilities, making way too much money for the amount of calls we've got so far ($21/hr). Hopefully it stays this way, because I've just been drinking coffee & watching anime all day. I would get up and go do something, but I have to be in a retarded zoom call all day in case someone needs something.

>>27608636
>£2440
Per...week? Or what

>>27608556
credit analyst at a credit card issuer
making $100k per year
got it by going to a top school, studying good, and applying to a shit ton of jobs and practicing interview questions.

>>27609162
month my friend

Unbelievably based thread
Posted from my couch phone

>>27603441
I fucking hate presentations, but I always fell fine after I start talking, its retarded I always work myself up for no reason.

>>27603441
>>27609434
i have the opposite problem. once I get started talking I'm fine initially and then I get in my own head, despite the fact that I usually know what I'm talking about, and start to flounder

i just record videos and play them on zoom for presentations now. fuck wagies

>>27609345
Nice Im in the same position, but its Security work, lately there has been fuck all to do and if it wasn't for my useless colleagues I'd probably just play guitar the whole day.

anything I should study while on unemployment to get an easy work from home job with a low barrier to entry?

I'll be hitting my 7th year of waging soon, and the further I get into my career the more I realize that the only way to really make it is to own my own business. I'm scared to do it though because I don't have any ideas that could dominate an industry or generate enough wealth to be generational.

ITT: LARPing faggots trolling FOMO’s

>>27609725
CompTia certifications (A+ -> Network+ -> Security+), AWS certifications, and learn some basic terraform/python/swift. If you want to be a dev who does nothing.

tfw due to lower rona numbers wfh has been all but eliminated for me, i can maybe do it one day a week holy FUCK lads being in the office is worse then ever please send help

>>27609893
>t. retard who is so unskilled he can't fathom that this is some people's lives.

seethe, cope & dilate.

I'm scared that my mic or camera will just be on. Anyone got nightmare stories? I scratch my junk pretty vigorously it would look like I'm yanking my shit. Once I had a call I had to be on but I had dairemies real bad so I just risked it and brought the laptop in the shitter. Nothing happened but its a constant fear

>>27609091
Time to treat your IBS with dicyclomine and SSRIs.

>>27599959
Third to last day at hell job and I’ve basically stopped responding to everything except for sometimes IMs. Then a week vacation and starting at dream job. Feels good.

>>27609725
Security, its genuinely piss easy if you have a slight bit of interest in learning the basics and a bit of common sense. Get some certifications, start with Security+ and pivot from there, a job in a SOC is the best starting point you get to see and do a little bit of everything there is to offer, the busier the better to you learn faster that way, once you feel confident take your CV and throw it into as many jobs that interest you as possible security is so understaffed its crazy. Also get semi-competent with Python, C and Java, and you'll be making 70k+ on the low end within 3 years if your good.

>>27601694
Based. I am in exactly the same boat. I presented a new PowerBI dashboard to my manager the other day and he LOVED it, showered me with praise and thanked me for my hard work. I spent 20min on a Friday morning slapping it together then played vidya the rest of the day. I love working with people who don't understand how these things work.

>>27610123
Just cover it with tape

>>27609964
you think this is low barrier to entry because you're a 'IT guy' and always have been. Can you imagine how long it would take for your average normie zoomer to actually pass their Net+ and understand the content.

I really do gotta learn to code huh lmao

Test post pls ignore

>>27599959
Financially, 2020 was the best year of my life. Never had so much cash. Working *very* hard, though—bunch of people quit because of COVID... more for me.

>>27610123
earlier in rona times i unmuted a call and was out fishing, because it was an hour long conf call thing where i didn't need to say but a few words just listen. nobody said anything at the time, but my boss called back later and asked why the fuck he could hear so much wind kek - told him i was at home but took the call in the backyard due to nice weather

>>27610365
Life is good frens

>>27610396
Doesn't matter. If a mic comes on and im fucking liquid shitting im done m8

>>27610123
When I don't think I have to speak, I just go into my computer settings and literally disable my microphone. If I'm wrong and it turns out I need to speak, I just type in the chat and say I'm having microphone issues.

>>27599959
Based thread on biz. I did two hours of work this morning to have the afternoon off.
Currently watching my crypto and stocks go up. I'm so fucking comfy lads

So we're using Microsoft Teams in my company and I want to know that I'm not actually appearing idle all the time, is there anyone that knows what kind of analytics it shows to the boss and any tips for staying on top of it?

>>27610421
Nah, you just got to have stack overflow open.

>>27610428
Since you asked so nicely, I will.

>>27610539
Are you a fucking moron? Don't bring it in the bathroom. You were allowed to shit in the office, you're allowed to step away to crap at home. Holy shit.

>>27610708
>shitting in the office
pretty sure you'll get sacked for that

>>27610499
Thats not too bad really
>>27610545
Not a bad idea but thats not gonna fly in my position unfortunately. One time perhaps but any more than that people are going to be like what the fuck m8 we have directors on get it together

>>27610123
>take zoom meetings on phone with camera off pretty much always
>end a week long fast with two massive iced coffees with espresso and everything on the menu at Dunkin’ Donuts
>have a meeting after
>storm’s a brewin’
>suffer through it
>”well I guess that wraps this up, bye everyone”
>everyone says bye, meeting is over
>rush to the toilet and blow my brains out, truly horrific stuff
>actually moaning in agony at points
>ten minutes later, check phone
>call indicator is still on
>the host never ended the meeting
>he heard everything

>>27609882
anon the big secret is that the "unsexy" businesses are where the easy money is. Will you be making zuckerberg money? no. will you be making more than waging will get you? yes, and you'll be able to enjoy your life significantly more.

>>27610708
You don't walk out of a meeting to shit. You wait til after. I couldn't tho, had to go right fuckin then

>>27610545
kek i have done this

>>27610678
Have never had a job, can never imagine having one. But i bet they're comfy

>>27608594
Custom blending of bulk liquids and powders.
We are pretty small (12 people) and all the time wasting shit we have to do is because of one whale. We wouldn't be doing any of this if it wasn't for her.

My actual work output has dropped like a stone but I'm still getting a shitton of praise. I don't know why.

>>27610123
Buy a webcam cover, that's a fear of mine as well, but being a grill also means I had that fear years before work from home was casual.

I once accidentally had my mic on when my boss was rambling about a feature he wanted ready within half an hour and I think I said something sarcastic, but thankfully he was talking louder than me and didn't hear it. I still shudder thinking about it. Make sure your mic is always off and never speak during meetings even if you think you're safe.

>>27610582
Id like to know this too
>>27610904
No fuckin way dude plz tell me this is larp I cant imagine

>>27610930
If you have to use the bathroom you can leave a meeting. When people left in person meetings at my job no one ever questioned them. What kind of child care tier hell hole are you working at? If you're not able to leave to take a shit when you literally need to, you need to talk to HR or find a job that respects basic humanity.

>>27610836
What chat app do you use? I know Zoom has a feature where you can just hold the space bar and unmute but Microsoft Teams doesn't. I guess if you DO need to speak, maybe just keep the computer settings open, quickly re-enable your mic, and say "sorry, I was on mute" followed by whatever you have to say.

WFH is unironically time of my life, havent been to the office since feb 2020 and I very likely will never have to again. Just got a nice chunk of money off GME too, bought myself an expensive bass guitar.

Life is good lads

>>27610582
i just keep mine off, no one pays attention to me on it

>>27610930
You can just say: "Apologies. I'll be right back." and just fucking take a shit.. I've done similar things. You don't have to explain yourself and you come across as an alpha. This is totally accepted where I work. (Fortune 100 company)

>>27611153
Oh he heard you anon, now he's waiting for his moment to fuck you.

>>27610582
I've heard managers have access to reports. The only tip I heard was leaving a heavy weight on the ctrl key to stay Online.

Wish i was cozy.
Im at a grad job learning and presenting the ins and outs of a piece of software thats still being produced by a 1 man team and a genuinely shit company thats already 2 years late on delivery.
I have to do live screenshare demos and explain every intricate detail of the steaming pile of crap, showing what works and what doesn't while having my old hag manager stare into my soul waiting till i say something wrong so she can put me on the spot.
Just 3 more months of this then I'll complete my 1 year and fuck off somewhere else, cant stand my manager and dont think I'll fit in my department at all when we get in the office.
Not cozy 4 me

>>27608995
I like to write an email during the day, save it as a draft and send it just before I go to bed so that my boss thinks I'm working 14 hour days.

>boss orders entire office to work from home in december
>do all my work in roughly 2 hours and spend the next 6 hours playing vidya
>productivity goes up
>boss orders everyone back starting this week for no fucking reason at all

god i fucking hate old people

>>27610582
https://twitter.com/oldmikeyrocks/status/1345784845109227520?s=20
python script to look busy

>>27611320
Nah, got a promotion after that so I'm sure I was lucky that time.

>>27608636
>9:00 turn on work laptop, keep sipping coffee
>10:30 - finish coffee
Fucking kek

>>27610413
what can i say other than, learn to code?

>>27601812
Amazing, do you need 47 pieces of frill/kudos to be a team player?

>>27599959
Just got a new job this week, been working my arse off in hospitals last year couldn’t be happier to get a comfy wfh gig. 3 days in to my first week and I’ve done fuck all. Also just found out it’s weekly pay, yaldi

>>27611447

Tell him no

Working from home is super /comfy/ I spend most of the (((workday))) watching anime, eating chex mix, and shitposting. Every now and then I have to answer an email or pickup the phone. Saving a lot of money on gas by not having to commute anymore. It’s like I’m getting paid a salary to NEET.

>>27611475
I'm using my own script to move the cursor on another machine to seem online, but I wonder if admins have access to specific activity data (eg. "active every 1 minute" or "constantly active from one machine, away from another" etc)

>>27603786
Government consulting here, this is because all the work gets outsourced to us 3rd party developers

I work about 3 hours a day and produce more in a day than most of my colleagues do in a week. Most of my time is spent day trading. I make more trading than I do working.

>>27599959

Hello good morning $CLF

>>27611394
Sorry to hear that anon, good luck with your next move, hope you land somewhere great.

>>27611743
Be careful, if your company uses any kind of endpoint monitoring, they can pick that stuff up especially strange scripts running unexpected on a machine that usually causes alarm bells to start ringing.

>>27604987
LMAO we didn't even do that much gay shit in rehab, all we had to do was say how we felt each morning with one word and what we were grateful for, not all that other bullshit. You literally have it worse than drunks getting sober hahahaha.

>>27611668
i'm one bullshit meeting away from faking a cold and insisting i have to work from home.,

>>27599959
Just got a big ass raise last week, working from home since early 2020 though.
I spent most of my time reading 4chan, trading stocks, replying to emails and managing meetings with clients.
I'm a programmer and I put in way less hours than should be legal to get paid as much as I do lol.
Anyway, WFH is giga based and I never wanna go back to an office.

>>27599959
>get paid $25 an hour
>do maybe 90 minutes of work a day
>save almost half my paycheck
not bad.

s network engineering wfhable

>>27611242
Teams. Which goes on idle if you take a fucking shit I would really like to know their trackable metrics
>>27611173
>>27611303
Honestly I'm sure you're both right. 2 jobs ago in a formative part of my career I had a massive piece of shit, scream in your face humiliate you in front of the entire team type boss, to the point where id privately threatened him if he addressed me that way again and it gave me like a weird career PTSD and ive never been the same since so stuff that would be absolutely normal to anyone else gives me weird anxiety. For instance he had us draft all his emails because he was a worthless piece of shit and if you did something he didn't like instead of calling you in to teach you he would shout in front of everyone "Anon, what the fuck is this?" And then just rail you out... so I still even get weird clicking send on emails even though I've sent probably 100k in my career because of that one piece of shit

the best part is being able to look at pornography whenever you want

i don't know how i'm going to deal with it when we are inevitably forced back into the office. the joy of a nice mid-day wank session after a freshly cooked lunch is peak kino. it makes me realize, when i worked 9-5 i was basically going into porn withdrawal all fucking day and would have to actually stop myself from masturbating in the office. frequent bathroom breaks help but, it's not enough. i need this forever.

>>27612151
i legit just had a wank to lovely lilith, still on work time kek

>>27611132
the HR people responsible for praising you dont have anything to do either

>>27611303
based alpha shitter

>>27610928
this is true. I'm allegedly an IT guy and always have been but if I wasn't a zoomer I'd be an independent construction contractor or smth like that. every blue collar workman I've ever met with their own business made bank.

>>27611782
in my experience you guys dont do shit that I don't do. you just get paid more in an uncertain work environment. majority of your non-devs (scrum masters, POs and such) are fucking fags too. t. fed dev

>>27612151

>>27611894
Can you elaborate? Eg how would that work with MS Teams?

>>27612151
>>27612234
>>27612246
Bruh I even jerk off during meetings, I put my microphone on mute and set the dial to 0 to make sure.
Usually when the cute girls talk is when I get to finish.

>>27612109
is*

>>27612354
Based.

>>27611927
Tell him you don't feel safe coming back to work because of COVID
Depending on where you are you should have a right to work safely

Teacherfag checking in. Hard to give a shit about teaching kids that also dont give a shit when I've made 3k flipping shit coins in a few days.

>>27602730
Same thing happened to me. Unasked raise and promotion. I don’t do alot of work, but I do good work when it counts and use the following tricks to look really engaged:

>show up early to morning meeting and chat up the boss before tuning out

>Answer emails around the clock instantly, even if just with “on it” “thanks” or “I’ll get working on this soon”

>cc senior members of the team on work emails that even only tangibly relate to them (unless they hate this, then dont)

>I created a really nice ppt template I spin into custom reports whenever a presentation is required

>Every once in a while, I’ll “agree” “amplify” or “provide strategic input” on a topic of discussion in our team meetings

It might not work for everyone because we’re a small business, but I’ve had great results with little effort.

>>27612354
I've seen a video with an online class where a guy completely forgot his cam was on, and jerked off in front of everyone. Dunno if fake, but definitely make sure this won't be you someday,

>>27612417
I am literally on a call right now solving a problem in a prod environment and have gelbooru open on my second monitor and nothing but tabs of hentai.
Best part? My wfh productivity is through the roof compared to in-office. All it takes is me not being bound to the shitty open office desk with the retardo manager getting pissy that I'm not focused for 8 hours straight.
Fuck boomers.

Life hack for you idiots who use Slack. Open google maps on your phone, start directions to some place, open slack with the mini maps overlay, stay "Online" forever.

>biweekly status update meeting
>weekly status report
>using MS Teams to keep a log of all your tasks
I’m losing my mind with this inefficiency

>>27612642
Gotta tape up your webcam when it's not in use, just in case you fuck up.

>>27607624
Based.

I do absolutely nothing all day and then spend 10 minutes to reply to random emails at 11:30PM to make it look like a workaholic

>>27599959
Kissed the wife goodbye as she goes off to her job, made some breakfast, currently sitting in my bathrobe sipping coffee and playing minecraft with my stinky linky page open on the other screen. Got a meeting later, will walk the dog while in the meeting. Apart from the mild inconvenience of fake and gay meeasks some of my favorite restaurants dying, the coof has unironically been a boon. Goodbye wagecuck cubicle. I do feel bad for businesses that got rekt, my mma gym is barely surviving by just ignoring lockdowns and putting tarps over the windows for speakeasy jiu jitsu lel.

>>27605536
We all have low points anon, the other guy who replied gave good advice. I'd recommend trade jobs, my friend who was shit in school became an electrician and is doing really well for himself

Starting my first WFH job later this month lads. Looking forward to being able to look at stonks and playing Minecraft while working just like I did at my last few office jobs

>>27612642
I don't even have a webcam, or rather, I do but it's a USB one and is permanently unplugged, and only gets plugged in when I'm going to do a meeting with a client, never for internal meetings.

>>27612634
I did exactly this plus I was willing to work after hours a couple of times late into the night (while I had been procrastinating and playing games all week) and bosses were taking off their pants for me.

I literally deployed something to test environment at 8PM, way off hours, and it was fucked (forgot to set environment variable correctly). I get an email at 10PM. I was playing games, I didn't see it until 3AM.
I fixed it in 5 minutes and sent the reply at 3:10AM saying that I fixed, with all bosses/seniors and CEO (we're a very small company, he emailed me before to ask me to fix it next morning).
And in the email I explained that I fixed it and that it took me a long time so I would be sleeping in next morning.
I woke up at 11AM with a bunch of emails praising me for saving their ass with the client and CEO basically saying that I was the best employee they had.

Yes, I got a huge raise from this bullshit.
2020 is probably the year I did the least amount of work ever and yet was the most "productive" and praised.

I LOVE WORK FROM HOME

>>27612952
If you don't use a laptop simply unplug it from your computer.

>>27604987
>>27601812

This sounds like a nightmare, I would much rather do some useful work instead

>>27599959
I've been unable to do anything except for the bare minimum for the past two weeks. I literally told my boss yesterday that I'd benefit from going back to the office when it's possible. I'm really worried that working from home has broken me and going back to the office is never going to be the same.

>>27612253
An endpoint monitoring system is something completely separate from MS Teams, it'll be a program more than likely visible on your task manager if its there at all, its monitors every section of your machine for behavior that is seen as outside normal parameters and creates alerts for your companies security team to review.

A random unknown script being started for no reason will usually always result in an alert, which will put you in hot water, as they'll be able to see how it got onto the machine, how it was started and what it was trying to do. The amount of data they are able collect is staggering.

If it is present it will be running under any number of names but the most common ones are CarbonBlack and Crowdstrike, so you'll either see CB.exe or CS.exe or any variation on those names. If you don't see that, its possible they aren't running it or its being run silently to prevent malware from fucking with it or not executing when its seen.

>>27611132
It could be because you're not wasting hours of your boss' time complaining about how hard it is with the virus and how everything is closed. Some employees feel entitled to use their supervisor as their personal emotional counselor. So maybe your boss is just happy you're being quiet and getting your work done.

Wake up 7, fiance already gone
gym 8-10
fap/shower 10-11
settle in to do work 11-1
hour lunch 1-2
usually an hour of work 2-3
Fiance comes home and cooks at 430
sit and wait for the day to be done having put in a good 2 hours of work

Rinse and repeat for a year

>>27612952
Just buy some shit like this, it's inexpensive and very comfy for whenever you need to open the camera.

>>27613177
That is, if you are using a company machine though, right? I'm using a company Macbook but I received it brand new and set it up myself, so I guess there's no easy way for something to be in there.

>>27599959
everyone in my neighborhood thinks im either homeless or a drug dealer or a trust fund kid

i wear the same thing everyday. i buy the same tendies and monster everyday. nobody ever sees me working and im constantly walking around town during working hours

what they dont know is im being paid 6 figgies to respond to emails and maybe write a line of code every other day

>>27613278
Does it have adhesive on it or something?

>>27613278
Oh that's neat. Makes you not look like a schizo with a taped up laptop too

oh. by the way.
>had previous wfh job as temp
>just had to help the company stay afloat while they were moving out of state
>everyone was going to be fired at end of year
>hired through a contracting agency
>they gave me a work laptop
>???
>job ended
>company in another state now
>all coworkers were already fired
>contracting agency never contacted me since then, know they go through people like tissue paper with crazy turnover
>no one ever collected my laptop or contacted me about it
>i've had it sitting here for 3 months now
>don't know what to do with it
kind of neat little guy, it's a touchscreen dell 15". should i sell it, keep it as a backup laptop, what? format and install linux or something, maybe use it for drawing anime scribbles? idk if the company would put trackign software or anything on it. it's been 3 months since the job ended.

>>27613570
Yes, it's like a sticker but can be removed easily and doesn't leave any residue.

>>27612125
I feel you on the workplace PTSD. I have massive trust issues from bad bosses in the past and at this point I just assume the absolute worst out of everyone until proven otherwise, and even then I still secretly keep an eye on them looking for any evidence of them being an asshole out to get me. I'll probably never get over it, thank god for crypto and stocks setting me up for financial independence.

work for an alphabet agency. sit on my ass all day and trade shitcoins and smoke and garden and spend time with my cat. i hold in my shit so i can take a big fat one on the uncle sam's clock.

>>27600516
my company is doing the same thing, but desu idc too tough - I have more time to do more important things

>>27613540
There's no way we can keep this up for long right?
They'll catch onto our game. There's no way.
I'm really worried that I'll lose the giga comfy life, not because I didn't get results, but because lots of other people failed to and are flunking WFH hard.
Especially cucks with kids/wives.

>>27599959
frens, now that trumpo is out of office, i'm bored
i see them all the time, so there must be money in it
how do i get a w2 for legit shilling from my nokia

>>27613410
Yeah exactly, how much was present on the machine when you actually set it up, was it a clean install with nothing there or was there a VPN a few other company tools?

Also does your IT team have the ability to push updates to the machine independent of you? If they can it could be there already.

>>27603938
yet here you are, dicking around on 4chins

I put my two weeks notice in and they assigned me a ton of work. It's like they don't even realize the only motivation I had was to avoid getting fired

>Some of my co-workers thought we'd be back in the office by last March.

It's looking more like this July if not next year. I never want to go back.

>>27613809
Clean install and no VPN. And no, it's just like a personal laptop, just being used for work. Guess I'm safe for now.

>>27613633
Oh very cool. I will be grabbing one thanks

>>27613126
Good job saving the company anon. That's the kind of go getter attitude we like to see around here!

>compchem PhD student
>set my sims off last week
>basically wait for them to finish which can take days or weeks
>maybe write some QoL scripts for the analysis
>maybe brush up on my chem
>might do 2-4 hours a day
>supervisors all think I'm progressing well


>tax free grant straight into my account

Love it

>>27613893
Do you have another job lined up anon? I want to put my two weeks notice in next Monday because I haven't done anything at my current job for the past few weeks and don't foresee that changing. I hate the company.

>>27613716
i dont know bro

but im enjoying it while it lasts

>Work from home
>Work for 5 hours a day spread out just coding easy shit
>Stay clocked in for 16 hours a day netting 8 hours of OT each day
>Make 5 times my salary with promotions incoming

Learning to code during the pandemic was the best decision

>>27613941
Then you're good man, enjoy your script. I've had to fuck people for this shit before, happy to know you'll be comfy.

>>27599959
>masters student
>consultant

I literally just shitpost, write emails, and do minimum homework.

Super easy

>>27614046
Thank you mister Shekelstein! It's a pleasure for me to work on this company, I'm always willing to go the extra mile and put in a few extra hours if it means the project goes well. The company's success is my success!


Best part is that it got fucked up because of me, I forgot to set an environment variable so the prod environment was targeting the test backend (which it can't access because separate networks).
Their fault though for wanting to push to prod on a Thursday evening with a meeting with the client the next morning.
I saw this shit coming a mile away.

>>27613631
It's not technically your property so you shouldn't sell it. Honestly best bet is to just try to contact the company and offer to return it if they'll pay for shipping. If they tell you in writing you can keep it then you're good to go. Other route you could go is check your state and federal laws on adverse possession and see when it becomes abandoned property.

>>27613716
if you have the skills wont you be able to find this ultra comfy style somewhere else?

>>27614228
what exactly are you coding? what do people need code for atm? work conferencing bullshit? automated business systems?

>get to take my time lifting in the morning
>sit in sweatpants all day
>browse /biz/ for early crypto opportunities
>work probably 4 hours on the busiest of days
>even if work goes back to an in person office, i'm in another state and won't have to go back in
>actually have time to work on personal projects
>mfw it snowed this morning and i don't have to deal with shitty roads after brushing and scraping the windows

i am truly thankful every day

Staff meeting for two hours today with a group activity. always fun to do these remotely. Just gonna listen to music and be on mute as usual.

BAO GANG

>>27599959
>riff-raff is gone
You are the riff raff

>>27611381
Great tip. Just dropped a deuce and tested it. I have one of those big metal binder clips I used and it worked great.

>>27614483
Atm it's literally just UI overhaul
Making a website look different and since its
"Such a difficult task" we get unlimited OT

Although the unlimited OT has been going on for 9 months now

>>27614346
Yeah, but basically my current position is giga-comfy. I took a temporary pay cut in 2020 while basically every other dev except me and another dude got fired.
I could have gotten paid more, but I'd have a lot more work and oversight at the companies I interviewed at.
Basically I have a dream comfy position right now and I don't wanna lose it.
And to get to this point you either need to prove to the company you can deliver results or have bosses that trust new hires, even if they have seniority.

>>27614178
Same. I want to ride the corona wfh wave to the grave.

>>27614483
There's absolutely no shortage of programming work. From websites and e-commerce to digital transformation for companies.
I work for a consultancy firm that automates, digitalitzes and improves other companies internal workings. Corona has put a lot of companies in a situation where they realize they want and need digital agility more than ever.

>>27600647
This, just dont send any emails at the off hours you might be working and make sure you show as offline. Save them for the business hours and strategically send throughout the day. Works like a charm

I was able to make a few thousands during the stock craze before they all get nuked but I want to use the profits to invest into some crypto and get out of my wagie job. Problem is, I missed the fucking pumps for BTC and ETH (ETH from 1.3k to 1.6k and BTC from 33k to 37k)

Give me a list of crypto to invest in and give me advices on each. I only know ETH, BTC, and LINK

>>27614758
jesus. my company's website is being redeveloped by an external business right now and it's now two months overdue from the original deadline. do you think we're just getting played by a business like yours?

any enlisted here?

I do half days in the office and half at home since I'm a scientist. Gotta say, the naps when I get home are so damn comfy. Tfw get home, take a nap, take a dump, fap, eat, then maybe do 30 min of work for 4 hours while watching netflix. Ahhhhhh almost a NEET lifestyle. A salaried NEET. Thank you COVID

My entire "job" these days is telling people in meetings I will do something in the future. And then I go back to lurking on the internet and fucking around on stocks and crypto which I make more money on anyway.

Teams will automatically set you to busy or in-meeting when you have something scheduled in Outlook, so I'm wondering if I just block off time in my calendar as appointments (I'd just say I set them to help me organize my time) if Teams would just tell people I'm busy/in a meeting all day so it never goes idle/away

>>27614955
You're getting fucked with some really nice expensive lube fren.

So glad to be in good company, anons. Most of my peers are wagie faggots crying about how hard it is to not have work or being in a high stress covid exposed environment and I can't relate or talk about real problems, like being too hungover and forgetting to fill out my timesheet.

Because of cheaters like you, there will be a crackdown on WFH. Companies will force you to leave the camera and mic on all the time, and they'll install eye tracking software to make sure you're constantly focused on the monitor.

>>27615114
My friend who works at a different company told me a scheme their sysadmin devised.
Basically befriend another dev you want to slack off with and set outlook appointments for meetings with them.
That both locks their schedule from being taken by other meetings and shows you as busy, and you both have eachother to cover.
But that means you have to trust the person you're in on it with.

>>27604841
This. My work persona is the chill positive guy who gets things done, and is a great listener. It has worked out in my favor tremendously. Doesnt hurt to have a late night DJ voice during meetings and phone calls

Have any of you guys tried to go on vacation while working from home? How's that worked out for you? Any tips? dont wanna take any actual days off.... might work during certain hrs of the day

It's as cold as fuck where I am and I wouldn't mind being on a hot and empty beach somewhere

>>27614955
Considering theres no real way to track performance during wfr theres a good chance you might be

Looking for a different job to get out of a what is essentially data ETL for health data when my background is in Economics where I have MS. Love the team, love the flexibility, hate the work, hate the constant inflow of adhoc demands from retards who all need their shit yesterday, and hate how my immediate manager can't communicate worth shit. Looking back into consulting. Would love to get some litigation or public policy work.

No commute kicks ass though. Getting up at 7:55 to be online at 8 and then off at 4 kicks ass.

>>27615114
Teams will still show you as idle in busy time. If im on a call where I'm only talking and even though my time is being used well for planning with other employees, if I dont move my mouse it will still go idle

>>27615216
By the time that happens I will have so much seniority nobody will ever want to question how I spend my hours.

>>27615307
Can't you just take your laptop with you and respond if needed? Just give an excuse that you were in the bathroom or something if takes a while to respond.

>>27613540
Based

when is enough money for you people? Why can't you just settle for a few hundred thousand and call it quits and live off grid playing vidya, raising children, growing weed and your own food and just coast off life until it's over? I basically do that with my unemployment. Once a week I have to apply for a job and they dump 1k on me monthly for that. They also keep extending. They also give foodstamps. Why do you seek status? Isn't just not working good enough? I don't get it. Don't you hate black people and not want to live around cucky whites? What gives? Is money that important to you?

>>27599959
I'm not going back to the fucking office. I will quit on the spot if they make me

>>27615307
I attempted it but my buddys dog wouldn't leave me alone and I had calls to cover etc. Just wasn't very good for my environment because im likely taking calls multiple and even random times throughout the day. Would be ezpz if you're not busy tho

>>27615307
The company doesn't care where you log in from. I wouldn't say anything, but if you're producing the same amount of labor they won't check that. I stayed at my girlfriend's for three weeks in another state, and no one knew at all. Again, why would they care? Unless you're on call for in person it's immaterial.

>>27610123

put tape over both cameras on phone / computer, get a headphone w a really shitty / broken mic and keep it plugged in...

>>27615307
Unfortunately I'm a govie and if I leave my commuting area I can get in real big trouble because of the virus. So I don't go far unless it's a long weekend. Also I'm not sure how to tunnel my network traffic on my computer through my home network securely while I'm away so eventually they could see my IP address shows me way away from where I should be, theoretically.

However I'm also stacked for PTO so if I want to take a vacation somewhere I always can. But I'm currently saving it for when they force us back into the wage cage at which point I'll put in for every Wednesday off from now until the end of my contract.

You will all be jobless soon as you can easily be replaced by computers

>>27615307
I fucked off to France for 3 weeks to my gf farm in the middle of nowhere other than shit internet I could work no problem.

>>27615307
wanted to but there is nowhere to go right now.
>>27614331
already contacted them once about it. said she'd get back in a week, never heard from her again. i won't sell, but i might put it in airplane mode and format it for personal use. "adverse possession" just brings up squatting rights on land. thanks though anon, i'll check it out some more later.

>>27616152
I don't see how us being at home changes that reality at all. If a computer can do my job, it can do my job regardless of whether I'm forced to commute every day or not.

>>27616152
Cope more faggot.

I fell for the trades meme

"working hard" is the biggest scam ever

>>27615749
Weak b8

>>27616598
well this is an honest question. How can I make this not appear like I'm trolling? The hole point of earning money is to live comfortably, but when you already have that why do you still want more?

>>27605175
Tips for a math master’s? Studied mostly useless abstract shit, only tangentially familiar with probability through measure theory / analysis classes, would like to pivot to data science from my current neetdom

>>27616152
By the time automation hits coding I'll have become a project manager. They won't automate my shit because it's basically what CEOs and execs do just at a lower level, so they'd be automating themselves out of a job too.

>>27599959
another day spent in total isolation

>>27616842
If you want to improve your bait pretend you work for 1500 a month instead of get welfare. People may actually respond to that

>>27616853
A college buddy got a master's in math. He couldn't find work in his field, so he became a fentanyl addict and died of an overdose just before COVID hit. Hope that helps.

>>27616842
Well for starters before I got to where I am I actually had to work and prove my worth. Despite me not doing anywhere near 40 hours a week I am providing my company with value worth enough for them to not only keep me employed but give me raises/promotions. That I need 10 hours instead of 40 for this is, if anything, a source of pride.
Why would I want to be a welfare nigger?

Well, WFH chads, I just got my annual performance evaluation back. Basically they ranked me at the very top over everyone else and are pushing to get me promoted.

I just didn't tell them I was planning to quit. Oopsie! I really hope this doesn't fuck up my plans to quit but even if they offer me a promotion I'm quitting, I'm just too jaded to stay in this line of work.

>>27600516
>bonuses cancelled for 2020
>November comes and they tell us we did really fucking good given the circumstances
>bonus is brought back just before the year ends.
Also I have played so much TF2 since I started WFH that they might as well start paying me in cosmetics.

>>27617162
Masters are a meme anyway, in my experience it never translates to actual skill. Just get a job and work.

>>27616842
>>27617200
Nvm looks like you got one. Well done i guess

>>27617362
All posts are bait, I'm here replying because it's fun. All discussion, real or fake, it matters not. It's only a way to pass time.

>>27599959
Didn't buy the meme stocks. Bought a cheap put on $JPM in case things actually went tits up. I'm out $50 bucks a bottle of scotch. Entertainment value was legendary though

>Deluge of pajeet vendors, none of whom can speak English
>Managers don't know the process
>Subject matter experts don't know anything
>Coworkers don't know anything
>You don't know anything
>No documentation for anything, you literally have to write down everything people say and date it because official sources haven't been updated in years
>Sales are absolute mouth breathers
>Procedures change by the week, but they don't update shit. Have to make your own guides for literally every aspect of your job
>Mathematically impossible to come back from a single error (you have to exceed "outstanding" productivity to even get enough work audits to average out a single error)
>Tom of different spreadsheets floating around.
>Different departments change their contact info without telling anyone
>Way too many forms and requirements to keep track of
>Constantly stressed out, cry a few times a week.
>Wfh, so you can't turn off at the end of the shift
All for 2% yearly raise. $19 an hour

I gave this job a solid year and I'm realizing it isn't ever getting better.
Actively looking for something new. Even a cashier job would be better at this point

>>27615307
Just dont travel on a working day or dur8ng work hours and they'll never know. I just kept my phone on me after sending a bunch of emails in the morning

please help me find a job appen and lionbridge have nothing

wfh is awesome.
would have been perfect if i didn't have a child to raise lol,
i get 6 hours of work done in 3

>>27617335
This. It helps expand your skillset and might help you bring new ideas to the table for your employer, but rarely translates well into what you need to look super appealing in the market.

>>27605835
This too. I've smoked a ton of weed since Covid started.

>>27603938
Knowledge work is a scam. I fully expect this gravy train to crash with no survivors soon.

>>27599959
Good afternoon fellow WAH elites. I am currently comfy, pretending to have system issues while I enjoy my coffee. Imagine waging in an actual workplace again like a commoner.

>>27617200
>Why would I want to be a welfare nigger?
Do you support the current system?

>>27612354
i too have been jerking it to qt sales gurl during calls from home, i wish she was on video but isn't, though sometimes i'll pull up her IG page while listening to her talk

>>27611114
Is she the owner too? Convince the owner that she wastes more time than is worth her presence. It shouldn’t be hard if you’re telling the truth.

>>27618180
You mean if I pay taxes?
Yes, in fact I've never gotten money back on my taxes from the government (European).
Damn straight I'm going to ride the comfy life while niggers get handed out free shit AT MY EXPENSE FROM MY TAXES.

If you mean if I morally support it, no, of course. Because unlike me, welfare niggers produce nil of value, they are a net loss to the economy, which by extension means me.

>>27618267
Exceedingly based.

>>27617685
Anon, as someone who dumped 5 years into Lionbridge, unless you're severely autistic I wouldn't bother. Lionbridge can get you a livable salary but no benefits and the work is occasionally neat but ultimately kind of tedious. Appen is awful, it's broken monkey shit work and the pay is third world tier.

Work on a skill and pursue normal employment opportunities, coding will get you to remote work eventually but you will probably have to prove yourself first. It's kind of funny, I used to think I "made it" working for those companies just because it was wfh, but as soon as I got into big boy jobs I ended up back at home, getting paid more and doing less work.

I was WFH prior to COVID. I miss being able to travel. Thinking of going to Colombia for a bit and testing it out.

>>27618455
It doesn't make sense. You live the comfy life even if you don't work. You just enjoy the satisfaction of "contributing?" you realize nearly all demand is fake right?

>>27616853
Just having a math master will be a huge advantage on your CV, you have to sell it to them. I spinned my phys master as some heavy calculation and analysis stuff while I had 3 courses and spent 2 years in a lab doing glorified chemistry (material science).
Learn python, machine learning libraries (sk-learn + visualization stuff like matplotlib, plotly or sns) have a github with a meme project and send those CVs.

>>27618877
I like my job, the status it gives, the pay which is far beyond what welfare would get me and the fact that I earned this position.
I had to work to get here, and the payout is bigger.

And yes, I enjoy the satisfaction of contributing even if it's "fake" according to you.

>>27614946
the most commonly shilled altcoins on here right now are GRT, BNT, XLM.

personally im long BTC/ETH/LINK/GRT

i recommend reading the tech & value proposition before buying a coin. long-term like 5-10 years I'm most bullish on chainlink

Work for a law firm and they are trying their best to strangle us through MS Teams

Nothing a nice weight on the CTRL key won't fix

>>27599959
Business is booming for my company, work is getting done at record speed and effectiveness without office bullshit overhead, and everyone's doing well in general. Feels good man.
Much as I hate the hoaxvirus shit from a political standpoint, part of me wants it to continue forever because I have never been happier working remotely, and I was suicidally miserable in the past having to get up early and cuck to a physical office just to fucking sit there every day while I have an expensive ergo chair, gigabit fiber, and more expensive computer hardware than my job could ever provide.

>>27617303
Stay until the promotion, use new role to get even better pay somewhere else

>>27619064
>I enjoy contributing to something people think they need because Jews tricked them into wanting it.
I enjoy taking money from people and contributing nothing to a broken system that values trickery and deceit instead of hard work and morality.

>>27618877
Yes but if everyone thought like you then you'd have nobody to leech off of and you'd be in a gutter freezing and starving. You should be sucking cocks in this thread thanking us all for your free gibs

>>27619659
if everyone thought like me we'd hang people like you

>>27614088
Yes I have a new one lined up. The one I have now expects us to go back in the office in April. No chance

>>27619503
I don't know what you think I do. I work for an IT consultant doing work for small and medium sized companies implementing digital systems for internal organization.
BPM, ERP, CRMs.
Turning office drone paper garbage into digital data that is easier to track and improves the company's productivity. They see quick ROIs on these projects and they pay big for more.
What the companies I do projects for do is not exactly my concern.
I could be making a system to maximize efficiency to kill child soldiers in Uganda for all I care as long as my checks keep coming in.

Once again, I had to work hard to get where I'm at.

>>27619887
>I had to work hard to get where I'm at.
no

Quit my job last week. Portfolio went up $1.34M today. Spent the last 4 hours working outdoors. Bretty gud day lads.

>>27619866
lmao, fucking fag boomers.
>work is getting done better, faster, and cheaper with remote work
>they would literally rather lose all that just to be able to keep an eye on you to make sure you aren't having unauthorized fun while you sit in an office idle most of the day
They deserve to burn. Shit, anyone spouting drivel like "I miss the social aspect of being at the office :::^^^^)))))" deserves it too.

>>27620098
Cope.

>>27620114
I'm extremely jelly and my one dream is to have a gucci portfolio like 100k. Right now its 5k and it's only on ETH cause its pumping hard rn

Pls gib advice

>>27610582

Literally put a weight on the insert key of your keyboard, been doing this for 2 months now

>>27620114
Holy shit, nice gains dude. You did that with day trading?

>>27619887
no that's just what you think you do. You benefit from corporate welfare just as much as I benefit from actual welfare. The difference is I do less work.

>>27620098
You literally have to work hard at some point in your life in order to get anywhere anon. Maybe not your whole life, but somewhere, preferably in your mid 20s, you have to take the hit, sit down and actually pump out some real value.

Unless of course you were just born into a trust fund or some stupid shit.

>>27620350
Once again, cope.
How much do you get from welfare, exactly?
Can you buy anything other than the bare minimum to not starve to death?

>>27619717
But they don't, they think like me which is why its better to live in a high income and educated area with lower crime where your kids come up better and have more opportunity. People think like me which is why they work hard and pity people like you and give you free things to survive because you're incapable. The human being is an illogical animal that pities and coddles our weak

>>27599959
Kek wfh is based. I've made 1.4 million this year trading options and crypto while working from home. I will not be going back to the office if they ask me to

>>27599959
My cucked job has had me back in the office since June 1st 2020....since then we've been sent home 4 times because of an employee testing positive for Covid.

I am pretty good, just watching ETH moon. I havent received a single slack message all day which is pretty comfe

>>27599959
I don't ever wanna go back to the office bros.
>love shitting at home without turd burglars
>love cooking my own food
>love saving tons of cash by cooking own food
>love not commuting 2 hours each day
>love not having to deal with office drama
>love not having anyone watch over my shoulder
>love having more time instead of pretending to work all day
>love saving money across the board
>only thing I really miss is the occasional office banter with cute office chicks

>>27620814
>that colossal clusterfuck that will happen when all the timewasters who have been working from home doing nothing have to all go back to the office at the same time

>>27621102
I miss office chicks too man. Gf and I broke up and shes gonna be moving out. Slightly worried about my interaction levels once I'm full time alone

>>27599959
My company decided to give everyone a choice of eventually going back to the office, or working from home and just going into the office for meetings and events. Naturally I chose the latter, which netted me a stipend to buy home office equipment. I bought a nice Steelcase desk chair and now I feel like I'm sitting on a cloud with excellent lumbar support all day.

>>27621353
fuckin new chair. sweet, dude

My company has closed the position I was occupying and they are giving me a different one. Way more responsibility, way more work, the same pay since times are difficult and "no salary increases this year, anon" but I havent gotten one in 18 months, its soul crushing and boring, AND I HAVE TO WORK FROM OFFICE WHILE EVERYONE ELSE ARE WFH CHADS.
Work in aviation too, would rather go on unemloyment but they arent offering. If I am waging I want to do it from home.
If FTM doesn't go to $10 EOY I am buying a rope.

>>27604987
Bro... I’m so sorry. I had a job like this for 3 years, but we only did this gay shit every few months. I can’t believe you put up with that WEEKLY. Get out, make a plan and get out, you will not regret it. What a waste of fucking time. Remember, through all the bullshit feel good baby crap, they’ll still fire you without a second thought and be huge cunts if you so much as express discontent with their gay bullshit. They don’t give a shit about team building. They give a shit about control and forcing you into their ideal, which is clearly retarded and inefficient.

>>27620165
My boss wouldn't even be in the same office as me. I would be calling him exactly like I am now. It makes zero sense. They hired a bunch of people during the pandemic and expect them to move now. I bet there's going to be a mass exodus.

>>27621240
for me "Twitch" helped. I just lurk in some girls' room just to hear a female voice playing video games while I work. I feel that helps a lot even though it's not the real thing. But it's better than nothing.

I joined a biotech start up super early on and now we have a $300M valuation. I basically just chill when I’m WFH (2 days a week) but unfortunately have to slave in the lab the other days. Pays good though, 6 figures in salary plus a metric fuck ton of equity because I joined early. Unfortunately I only own 150 LINK and 1 ETH (5000 GRT, 3500 ADA, 200 Uni) so I’m never gonna make it I don’t think.

>>27621353
Steelcase is the tits my dude. I was nervous about dropping the cash for the Gesture sight unseen, cause I had literally nowhere to try one out, but I fucking love mine.

>>27621102
Almost all the chicks in my office are ugly, everyone else is boomers. I still banter with one of the cute office chicks over intra-office IM, which granted isn't the same, but still good.

My work group apparently opened a "case study" into making wfh permanent for some people, and I would be a prime candidate. I hope it goes through.

>>27621529
Jesus christ man its time to get on the job hunt. Hope you're making decent money

>>27604987
I'm so sorry anon. Previous job was like this, half the company dumped them on the first chance.

>>27604987
lol don't treat your employees like little children.

Wfh call center here for a extremely seasonal product, during April and October I work like a dog. The rest of the time I do /absolutelynothing/ this is the life frens. I've been making money investing, saving money, hanging out with the wife more who also wfh, YOU CANT MAKE ME GO BACK I WONT DO IT REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>27621353
Who the fuck would choose to go to work when given the option besides Karen's desperate for morning gossip hour?

>>27604987
Waste of fucking time. I'm glad my boss doesn't put up with shit like this.

wfh manager here. all you anons trying to figure out how you're getting away with it and still getting praise/raises. the trick is im not working either. my reports who are trying to lay low and do minimal work are also not creating work for me. the schizo basket cases that "cant adjust to covid" are all getting PIP'd. they create too much work.

>>27622411
Karens, boomers and retards.

>>27612253
If they are monitoring your pc to see if you're actually doing work you're already fucked

>>27621759
I am europoor and since its covid time, all departments are on 80%. After taxes I am earning a big nice 650€. I literally want to KMS typing this. Has been searching for a few months now, had some interviews but the competition is insane. I'll keep trying and learning new skills until I escape from this hell. Wagmi, anon, wagmi..