/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>26245184
>1
Because your hiring
>2
Because you need someone now
>3
Writing this statement
>4
How to hire the man in front of you
Journey to hiring the man in front of you
Wisdom of hiring this man in front of you
>5
apply for jobs
>6
Looking for jobs
>7
Because they are also looking.

Signed. Job Seeker Jr.

>>26245245
Your hired!

>>26245184
just buy chainlink bro

>>26245184
Yes, they are. And the interviewer will treat it like they are doing you a fucking Herculean favor by even gracing you with their presence for the interview. The only difference between the interview and the entirety of your employment there and giving $5 blowjobs to hairy fat man named Bruce in the bathroom of a truck stop will be the amount of piss on the floor.
That said best of luck OP. I know you can do it.

>>26245184
They want college grads to apply. Not joking. Fucking chain stores have applications like this. Notice how similar it is to a UC application.

>>26245316
>$5 blowjobs to hairy fat man named Bruce in the bathroom of a truck stop
why can’t it just be cute blonde twinks? ;_;

>>26245316
and the worst part is waiting around 1 month between applicating and interview.

Just tell them what they want to hear.

>>26245184
Bonus question:
How firm is your handshake?

>>26245363
Are you the tranny who posted in /BB/ this summer?

>>26245245
>Pfftt. Hey Phil! Get in here! Get a load of this application! You ever seen balls as big as this? Seems like a real class act, a jokester. We need guys like him. Call him back before he gets hired by someplace else!

>>26245184
they're all like this its so fucking dumb

They don’t want original thinkers op they want agenda toting robots. Learn to code

>>26247874
yeah like coding isnt robots job

>>26245184
They're checking whether you're able and/or willing to execute laborious and menial tasks to perfection.

They do not want someone who looks at tasks or processes or ways of doing things and questions them. That's not the job here.

Describe in painful detail how you did a data entry job and had to restart because you failed to ask your client a critical question at the start. Describe how you managed customer expectations while doing all that's in your power to deliver. Describe how you delivered and everyone was happy. Stick to the STAR method of interviewing/reporting:

Situation
Task
Approach
Results

>>26247874
Programming is treated like a cost centre at most businesses

>>26245413
>>applicating
Where are you from? Latin language background?

>>26245316
>giving $5 blowjobs to hairy fat man named Bruce in the bathroom of a truck stop will be the amount of piss on the floor
When Anon brings experience to a larp thread

>>26245184
>why you're the best customer service representative for this role. give quantifiable examples of related achievements.
i'm easy to get along with and i have dealt with difficult people many times over, and this would be an opportunity for me to showcase my social skills.
>describe why you fit perfectly with our values
tl;dr
>what's the toughest challenge you've ever overcome in your life? how did you overcome it?
the toughest challenge i ever overcame was moving on. it's tough to keep moving forward and still look back at where i came from, but it shows growth. i'm not afraid of seeking greater heights in life, that's how i believe i'm able to overcome any obstacle that comes my way.
>what are the last three books you've read
that's on you
>what do you do for fun?
i like to exercise. fitness is my passion.

>>26245184
>explain what you're doing for a job. if you don't have one, explain why.
i have been indulging with self growth, such as reading and improving my vocabulary and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. my extremely supporting family doesn't feel the need to rush me and values nurturing their own before setting them out to the world, and i also believed in their values, that's why i have not made any application till now.
>if you have one, explain why you're looking elsewhere.
i have never done call center and i believe it would help me expand my horizons. having a set of skills are what makes or break a person in today's world and i believe the more experience i have, the better i can shape my future.

>>26245184
interviews are just formalities desu, there's no need to get really stressed over it. just be confident and show that you're competent. oh, and dress nice.

>>26245184
BULLSHIT YOUR WAY IN

>>26247874
Highly ironic post.

>>26248988
This. Fake it till you make it

It's obvious they are just looking to have some fun and are making fun of you.
No normal employer has the time or the patience for such a questionnaire. This means they have so many people applying they are just searching for ways to filter out 90% away and only the most dedicated wagie in a cagies will remain in this process

>>26249064
great things like bitcoin and monero didn't come from grocery store clerks
they came from people investing their time into programming languages and cryptography.

>>26245245
based
>>26245184
also, give the application link, we'll all send in similar applications.

>>26248180
It at least gives people freedom to contract/remote/self business

>working in a call center
LMAO
>That salary
Are you Indian?

Sell drugs or flip burgers. It's better

"Get a job"
"Ok!"
*Proceed to experience endless bullshit like this*

>>26245316
You say that, but right now you cannot hire people at this rate. With unemployment extras and the stim checks, no one wants to work for $20/hr at something as awful as a call center

A human will never read your responses anyways. It goes through an applicant tracking system that pulls keywords, before rejecting you.
Protip for my young bros: never apply to a job that's "NOW HIRING".
Get jobs through friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers (if you're already working)... even shit entry level jobs.