/biz/ - Business & Finance

He will start by saying
*AHEM*

>>26156443
He wouldn't announce anything good at a third party Chinese event

>>26156443
He'll use the same slides from 2017 and smart-Con

He will be using his trusty old slides.

It will be his usual power point presentation, except he will mention staking going live as if it were a minor detail at the end.

prepare your anus

>>26156443
he will share his new Toilet Oracle with a built in Big Mac dispenser. He will literally never have to stand up again to take his fat Link dumps

I'm making a link meme video. It's almost complete.

It's the same fucking slides guys

SEC has also a note!

>>26156577
Digits says you need to deliver.

a new big mac recipe

>>26156592
Is this real??

>>26156443
i heard he started walking to subway for lunch

Fundamentally, I'm excited about this.
This is the year. Definitive truth.
Math-based guarantees, rather than brand-based guarantees.
Fundamentally derivatives.

>>26156592
kek why is he naked and stuck in a childrens playground?

>>26156999
Checked

>>26156999
fucking checked, we're all gonna make it, triple digits this year EASY

>>26156443
same
exact
slides

>>26156443
Announcing that he's dumping 5mil more stinkie linkies on bagholders.

>>26157016
>he doesn't know

>>26157016
People post some funny pictures in the internet haha

>>26156443
He will present the new Chainlink wallet.
Can't fall behind PARSIQ can they?

>>26156443
CZ is going to bring justin sun to the stage as an offering to sergey, in which they will proceed to the beheading ceremony when accepted.

>>26156592
Is this real?

>>26156592
was sergey hurt in the making of this photo?

>>26156520
>"Alright well... here we have Mr Sergey Nazarov, representing Smartcontract and their flagship blockchain oracle project, Chainlink! Please welcome Sergey to the stage"
>light applause gives way to the sound of heavy breathing and clipping as the sound of moist meat rubbing on flannel reverberates throughout the venue
>Sergey lumbers out on stage, carefully judging the distance between each step and taking several minutes to traverse the tiny set of stairs due to his prodigious bulk
>He stops at the top, wiping his brow vigorously. When his hand drops, his eyes are bloodshot and glazed, and he has mustard stains on his collar. He has either not noticed this or simply doesn't care.
>A brief look of surprise crosses his face as he remembers where he is
>"Ah so uh... funda...fundamentally"
>he fumbles with his little clicker and almost drops it after fishing it out of his pockets, which also seem to contain several spicy shaker fry packets from McDonalds
>one falls to the floor, and he turns away from the stage as if this will hide the fact that he is just sucking on his finger after dipping it in the bag
>"Yannow... I think I'll just let this neato little presentation present itself! Haha... there's a surprise at the end."
>He clicks through the slides on the projector for several minutes, yawning audibly and checking his phone as he does so.
>A smile creeps across his face as he nears the end of the presentation.
>"Oh, here's the new part."
>the last slide shows a new transaction from the usual wallet, this time selling off 1.4 million tokens in one batch
>he makes a hand gesture at the effects booth, and a small pyrotechnics display fires off while fresh fifty dollar bills rain down from above the stage
>he lies down in the money pile and makes a money angel as the curtains draw closed
>he is later seen being carried out on a stretcher to his limo, not because he is injured but because he is asleep

>>26156889
>>26157531
Jfc, I checked and its actually real. Wtf?

>caring about a non-white coin
lol
just buy ada

>>26156443
They should start using this image.

>>26156443
I thought Binance had made enemies of chainlink?

>>26158192
let's just say he had to feed the link marines

>>26157938
kekked audibly

>>26157938
kek

>>26156443
Chainlink has not right to exist