/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>25503326
Based

I’ve maybe done an hour of actual work since I started working from home in March. Not sure how they haven’t caught on, or they just don’t care

based

>>25503326
fellow maggot farmer?

I unironically sell dildos, so most of my job is actually just browsing /biz/ or watching movies on my laptop while waiting for customers, and occasionally helping those customers decide what vibrator might suit them best.

It’s actually a pretty sweet gig, quite secure.

Been 2 weeks on a vacation lads, doing my daily computer opening and checkin to the comfy thread

>>25503379
I did like 8 solid hours since March 2020. Was expecting to be bombarded with 3500 emails this morning, but I had 20. Gonna be a good year.

>>25503534
are you hiring? I live in Japan but can work remote. I am also fluent in Japanese if you want to break into a new market...

>>25503326
>have to actually go in today because a hard drive on a server failed

Will resolve as quickly as possible to return home though.

I've been put back on working from home but I hate my job and got denied a raise. Gonna use up all my benefits this week then quit next week. If they give me the raise I asked for I'll stay (and keep doing nothing) and if they don't I'll just coast for a few months.

>>25503824
Sounds comfy anon, best of luck.

I work in DevOps , permanent position WFH , £65,000 ... Literally nothing but meetings so I never get any actual work done so I just sit here watching Netflix in my comfy blanket whilst half listening to the calls I'm in

Also a tip for you lads. If you need a mouse wiggler but can't or don't want to install software on your laptop, you can put your mouse on an analog watch and the second hand's movement will wiggle your mouse.
>>25503861
Cheers.

>>25503326
I don't work.
I live in my parents' basement.

I just got rejected from a WFH position today

>>25503326
>>25503932
>Tfw live with parents and wfh
>Do nothing all day
>Mom opens door - immediately pretend to be working
I’m too tired to pretend, what do?

Its days like today I wish I had an office to go to, this morning poop is an absolute STINKER

>>25503899
how do I get in to devops

what does everyone do who works from home? I'd like to look for something different

>>25504689
web development

>>25504689
Accounting

>>25504093
lmao

>>25504689
net apps development

>>25503932
based neetposter

>>25503758
I’m just a manager, not the owner lmao.

>>25504023
Keep applying until it works, you may be emotionally broken but you will have money.

I must be one of the few who smiled when they said further/full lockdowns expected to be called here in England.
Probably be WFH for most of this year if not all of it.
>C O M F Y

Welcome to the good life

Buy CLF.. Google is your friend

>>25503326
another day of my 2 months unpaid vacations
so i can also skip my 5 minutes virtual stand up meeting and avoid emails all together
my salary is irrelevant compared to my btc stack, so even 5 minutes per day are a waste of my time and a distraction from focusing on growing meme money numbers
probably never going back to work
feels good bros

>>25503326
What jobs do you do where you stay at home doing nothing?

How do you not do anything as a wfh code monkey?

>>25503326
Same

>>25506426
>Let's circle back to that item later, it seems out of scope
>I added Brad's team to the weekly meeting, I'm hoping to leverage some synergy between groups if we focus on our core competencies
>We can touch base during tomorrow's stand-up, give you some time to get the lay of the land
>I want to highlight our value add and show that this is a win-win
>I'm feeling out of the loop here, when was the last time Frank ran the numbers?
>Brandon is going to do a deep dive into the data and perform a drill down into our key customer segments
>This initiative is really going to move the needle on our top KPI's
>We can already make this a game changer by taking care of some low hanging fruit
>Let's take that off-line, ping me when you know you'll be available
>We're not trying to boil the ocean here, our north star hasn't changed
You’re just stuck in these meetings most of the day so nothing happens.

>>25503326
Same, I haven't sent a single email all day, no one from my team has even spoken to me.

Warehouse worker here, I would kill to wfh. Are there any entry wfh jobs that are hiring?

>>25507658
Yes, they're always hiring programmers.

I don't understand what kind of faggot jobs you people have.
If anything I work MORE from home because the e-mail and calls just don't fucking stop and they have no time limit because HEY YOU ARE ALREADY HOME HAHA

t. senior manager

>>25504062
Those were the days, anon. Those were the days

>>25506203
the shilling never stops

I'm resolved to quitting my job this year. Just going to "WFH" until they fire me.

No guilt because I've effectively already quit.

Who
>company's efficiency has dropped off immensely, so most of your effort trying to improve things is for naught, and you spend the rest of the time meeting with your boss and colleagues, talking around the subject, churning the wheels of the facade until enough time has been bought or enough people leave, which ever comes first
here?

>>25503326
same, today I first updated my shitbook to Big Sir, then we had a comms outage and then I was done for the day, all while shitposting on /biz/

>>25503326
Cringe

>>25507877
Same, I'm looking for a new job as have become utterly disenfranchised with this one. After working my balls off I discovered the same reward applies regardless of effort at this place so I have resigned myself to minimal effort.

I actually think I could get a new role and no one from my current place would notice I'm gone, I do wonder how long I could keep receiving two salaries for...

>>25503326
I want to fucking kill myself already

9:55 woke up, turned on my laptop to check in for my daily standup(more like lay down lmao)
10:00 - 10.30 standup
10.30 - 10.35 check email
10.35 start masturbating
10.45 - 12.00 watch YouTube videos
12.00 eat chips and sandwiches for lunch.
12.45 post lunch nap, I have desktop notifications on for Slack in case someone messages me.
14.15 wake up and start masturbating
14.30 do some actual work which I quickly finish
14.55 - shitpost on /biz/
15.35 start watching YouTube videos again

That’s my day so far and I’ve been doing this for two years already (already did wfh before the pandemic)

>>25508267
What's your job?

>>25508147
cope

>>25508361
Software engineer. I notice the overall productivity of my team is low so I deliver little to lower the expectations. If you fix too many bugs/deliver too many features you are setting the bar too high and they will expect this everyday from you. Just keep them satisfied enough with your performance and you can get by by doing the absolute minimum.

>>25503824
>hate your job
>denied a raise
There is no upside. Obviously you know this but let me reiterate it for you: LEAVE

I told myself for over a year and a half id leave my job after being denied and raise and a promotion yet I stayed around like a cuck just hoping for mr boss man to reward me. Fuck it. Just leave bro.

>>25507800
Well you are a senior manager so thats to be expected. Most of the people posting are entry level, have a job that is useless to the company or they got lucky and have a good paying job with little to do at this time.

I am working probably 70% of the time. Honestly, I probably only work 5% less a day than I do in office.

>>25508267
my day exactly

>>25507752
avg starting pay?

>>25508524
Is there a certain sector/industry in which these types of jobs are more common? Also a software engineer and looking for comfy gigs.

>>25506368
i work in banking risk management and my boomer boss is probably retiring in a year and DGAF. i do some projects and make deadlines but really only takes a couple hours a week.

>>25503899
How many years of experience?

>>25503326

Now with Slack offline there's no one to bother me. Have a nice day kings!

>>25507266
>i'll take a look and get back to you
>don't get back to them
>they don't chase

>>25509816
always
just circlejerking until it fixes itself or gets lost lmao

I'm done for a long time already, just couldn't bring myself to quit because it's basically free money and "having a job" is beneficial for my opsec. Truly the best timeline imagineable. Cheers, my wfh bros.

>>25509739
Gigabased

>>25503758
fucking english teachers.

Only thing I did today was sit in a meeting for 45 minutes. I probably won't do anything at all for the rest of the day, either. Should I ask for a raise?

>>25503326
Exactly the thread I was looking for. Morning boys, a merry day to you lads, cheers.

>>25503379
>>25503700
Exact same here. I’ve legit done jackshit since late March and I got a “good job well done” on my midterm review so idk. It just seems as long as I respond to emails within the day and do shit half assed at last minute that’s all my boss could want.

It’s pretty comfy, 20 emails I returned to this morning as well. I’m hoping to keep this job for another year at least and if I can stretch it to 3 that would be great to get my full vested 401k. After that I’m fucking off to something else, fuck engineering.

>>25510967

Just the typical life of a sparky again, the two weeks off from christmas was bliss though.

Any other tradies on this board?

https://downdetector.com/status/slack/

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH ITS ALL DOWN SLACK, ZOOM, AWS, EVERYTHING

>>25503899
hello fellow bongbro, how do i get in? i'm stuck working a shitty accounting job at 20k a year.

>>25503326
I missed these threads over the break. I couldn't tell the difference between being on holiday and working though. Playing Civilization and eating tendies right now, how is everyone else doing?

>>25511408
im in between clients at the moment and getting paid to self study aka shitpost all day and swing crypto/stonks
sometimes i wonder if i already made it

>>25511518
sounds comfy anon what do you do if i can ask?

>>25511408
I'm reading The Saga of Tanya the Evil and I'll be going to the gym in about 90 minutes.

>work from home, but overloaded with constant deadlines
>don't even get paid enough

>>25511611
software developer (nodejs, aws)

>>25511408
Damn that’s a quality meme.

>>25511075
>>25511839
same lmao wonder how this year end review is gonna go in a few weeks

>>25511664
i was reading Sweet Home earlier, I like horror so it was a comfy read. I was annoyed that I got distracted by a ping from Slack but luckily that became irrelevant quickly.
>>25511708
What do YOU do? Is it entry level?

>>25511518
advice for swing trading crypto? im not much for gambling and figure i could toss a 2-3k into the wind to fuck around with it. the swings are truly insane right now

>>25511898
my advise is dont do it, your gonna get burned. you will bleed sats until you figure out your own system. stonks are better

>being alive and having a functioning brain during last year’s dip
>still working in 2021
just how fucking stupid are you?

>>25511898
swinging in a bull market is a scary proposition friend.

>>25511898
Don't, swingers get the rope. Just DCA into any of the big 4 and just hodl until the bubble bursts, then cash out and wait a few months and start DCA'ing again.

>>25512000
if youre into the biggest 3 btc/eth/link wouldnt it be easy to just wait for a 3-5% pump, sell, wait for a small dip, buy idk just looks kind easy anon

right now i just hold 500 link and hope to pay off my mortgage early if it goes to 300 or something nice

>>25503379
>>25503700
>>25511075
what do you guys even do?

>>25503899
on 50k as frontend but mid level not lead or senior

Is switching to a 60-65k job pushing it?

>>25508524
what kind of software work do you do? Im trying to break into that field. currently learning Javascript

>>25512110
thats what i do
eth/btc swings
no shitcoins ever
if i get fucked, i just hold bags until im positive again

>>25504062
just say you can't do anything until the database is done compiling

>>25508267
Almost me but I have slack message anxiety

Need to set up some kind of alert for my name even without the @ or specific important channels that send me an alarm to wake up

God, getting out of IT Support was the best decision I ever made. In Information Security now, and all through last year, my boss took more and more of our responsibilities off of us, so we effectively do nothing all day but the minimal amount of tickets that come in each day.

I have been fucking off HARDCORE since the lockdown and just got a 20% raise for doing so well. I want to talk with my co-workers about how much of a sweet deal we have right now but I'm afraid that they all just don't know it yet or are too afraid to talk about it in public and shatter the good time we have right now.

IT Support, meanwhile, is a never-ending skull fuck of ticket escalations. Fuck that. Even worse with the pandemic.

>>25512279
just get a degree and walk into a defense contractor if ur a good goy and can get a clearance just sit around all day and you dont have to do shit and they wont fire you because they cant directly hire h1b's

if u arent in america, gg sorry. sucks here too though

>>25509739
based slack giving us a day off

QUICK. I have an engineering degree, and can check Hispanic/Latino on my applications. What comfy wfh job should I seek? IT stuff? Sales? First day back at the office and I can barely make it to lunch

>>25503326
so true
its fuckin great isnt it

>>25512665
apply to any big defense contractor, you know the zionists arent stopping building weapons for israel and her allys. they are literally always hiring. spic

Just now
>phone rings in pocket
>quickly try to mute youtube music
>computer lags
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
>phone ringing
>manage to get speakers off
>answer phone right before it goes to voice mail
>it's a fucking charity trying to get at my shekels
>immediately tell them to delete my number
>my reading position is totally ruined, have to get settled in again
Unbelievable. I don't think I get paid enough for this.

>>25514022
Based

>>25514200
It's truly a tough life but it's important to remember that if I wasn't doing nothing and collecting this fat salary, some other chump would and he wouldn't be throwing it all at shitcoins. He'd be spending it on a second wife and overpriced sports memorabilia. I'm basically doing God's work here.

>>25503899
Burger, software developer, low six figures, I'm also stuck in meetings all day, hardly do any coding, and still gets gold stars on my annual reviews. I really do wonder where we'd be as a society if management let us do our fucking job. Probably on Elon's Mars colony.
>>25503932
You're a consultant. Boom.
>>25508524
Yeah, this can't be stressed enough. Dilbert isn't a Boomer larp, it's an instruction manual on how to survive. If you work hard, you will be fucked over by managers that will take credit and forget to mention you. Do your job duties, keep track of what skills are hot in the market, and "volunteer" to get resume-padding bullet points in those skills. That's it. Not a minute more.

I have a meeting in 45 minutes to provide a status update on a task I was supposed to start 3 weeks ago and haven’t yet

>>25512537
how the FUCK do I get out of IT support
I spent 4 hours today switching people over to a new remote gateway server

Can anyone get me an easy work from home job? I'm based in the UK.

>>25512268
I’m a essentially a middle man between production and software running cost savings projects. Someone does all work, I implement it and just field emails, push software changes, respond to questions etc. My job is literally to penny pinch. Pretty soulless considering I had grand visions of being apart of the next generation of spaceflight when I went to college. All I want now is to be left alone.

>>25515392
ballsy as fuck.

>>25503925
kek´d and screencap. gonna try this unironically

t. comfy accountant

>>25503326
based

>>25503925
You can also put a coffee cup on your keyboard and open up MS Word. I’m on page 43 right now

>>25503925
I have a simple python script that just moves my mouse every 30 seconds, works a fucking dream I put myself on 'Do Not Disturb' one day in summer and went out on a pedalo for the day

>>25504689
cust support, fml

>>25507266
Need more buzzwords

>>25508267

>>25515758
Got a webcam?

>>25503326
What do all of you people working from home even work as

>>25517339
I'm not getting my dick out

>>25503925
>>25515842
>>25516035
I just play a muted song/video on repeat in Windows Media Player

>>25503534
Can you link so I cand send a resume?
You can also message me on telegram
Please
@H7861

Imagine

>>25503326
>tfw quarantined two weeks right before leave
>tfw army says 2 week quarantine after holiday block leave
>I just got a month off

>>25520056
What do they have you do, sit in barracks all day? My command has us WFH right now so even when we're in ROM I still have to attend meetings and muster and shit.

>>25520560
All I do is sit in my barracks room and shitpost on /asp/. The only place I can go is the chow hall and laundry room. What MOS are you?