/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>24607116
How long does it live?

>>24607116
Shiba Inu

Mastiff. Already had one rip chaos

small dogs are gay

>>24607257
small dogs are sweet babies that need a bigger dog for a companion

Get a small male and a big female

>>24607257
found the compensating faggot

>>24607116

>>24607116
lol what a piece of shit cringy manlet boomer dog

>>24607116
a big dog

>>24607116
GS

>>24607257
Stop pretending, you're not fooling anyone.

German Shepard is the gold standard

>>24607116
genetically engineered cat that is as tall as a large dog but its body parts are still cat sized

i don't know breeds but for me it's one big curly chap, one little nigger, and one calico kitten. i'd get them in the opposite order so they know who's who.

Behold the true dog master race

>>24607429
the ONLY reason you like that dog is because of muh nazis
you are GAY

>>24607429
>not a belgian malinois

>>24607524
you will never be a woman

>>24607277
You can't say you've made it until you can afford an Amazonian gf for your dog

>>24607116
For me, it’s the Giant Schnauzer

>>24607116

Inui.

I'll get a 24/7 human pet sex slave

the American water spaniel

>>24607257
>>24607277
Small dogs have their places. They are often GREAT for licking. They'll sit between a girl's legs and lap at her clitoris for twenty minutes. Big dogs just don't have that eager single-minded licking instinct.

I've posted my business plan before here. Male golden retriever, female standard (full-sized) poodle, or maybe I'll reverse the male/female, not sure. They can pop out goldendoodle puppies for all the boomers who want those, and I'll be getting fucked in the ass by the big boy every time he can get it up, and pleasuring the bitch every night either orally or with my dick.

I'd prefer a female poodle because I've had a golden retriever male before and his cock was perfect, and frankly poodles are just more feminine. But I'm not sure they're big enough vaginally.

>>24607524
Imagine being stupid AND a cuck.

>>24607841

>>24607608
Oh, man, there are some great ZooSkool videos with one of those. HUGE cocks.

>>24607677
I see you're a fan of Dean Ing's "The Rackham Files". Or at least you have the same tastes in pets.

>>24607232
>>24607757
i unironically own a lot of dogecoin and i want a shibe in the future.

>>24607841
Are you worried about having your dogs around friend and family and having them act up/try to hump you/otherwise out you in public? And/or, concerned having two unfixed animals would in itself alert your family that something is up?

I come from a diehard spay/neuter family and have never had a gf/bf. Pretty sure if I got an intact dog the jig would instantly be up with them and I wouldn't be able to deal with the shunning that would ensue from my parents.

>>24607116
dachshunds are the iykyk of dogs
they’re so proud they have absolutely no idea that they’re small

Chihuahuas are the ultimate indoor dog

>>24607225
6 months

>>24607116
a shiba inu and a golden retriever

I asked some crypto experts and they advised me toparticipate in it. But wanna know your opinion about their options and solutions for passive income. Is it worthy?

Irish Setter

>>24607919
>Are you worried about having your dogs around friend and family and having them act up/try to hump you/otherwise out you in public?
Not really. You just train them thoroughly. Sex ONLY in the bedroom, ONLY when you're on "that" blanket.

You can train them more restrictively if you want, like "only when I initiate it -- you don't get anything if you jump on me first." I don't want to go that far with mine since I'm basically a sub and I want them to initiate.

I've been thinking about trying to use scent clues like "only when I'm diffusing cinnamon essential oils into the room" -- after all, dogs normally use pheromone scent cues to determine when to have sex. Depending on how disciplined you can keep them, you might or might not have to go that far. But I'd be a little nervous about that, like what if I took the dog over to a bakery and they were baking cinnamon rolls that day, or what if a neighbor started growing lilac bushes, or whatever scent I used.

One thing I want to try is saving urine from the bitch when she's in heat. Just like the "doe in heat" urine they sell in hunting stores, it should be loaded with those pheromones. That would be an easy scent clue to train him on. :-)

I knew one couple who had to have their male dog neutered finally, because he was just too strong-willed to stay controlled about it. If they've already learned about sex, then they don't totally lose the instinct afterwards, but he was never really the same.

>>24607257
I found a small dog at work this year and he's pretty based.

>>24607116
>tfw no husky wan wan

Why are you all posting obscure dogs, get 2 dobermans and be done with it

>>24607919
>And/or, concerned having two unfixed animals would in itself alert your family that something is up?
Not a problem for me. First, I do in fact plan to breed them to produce puppies, and second, I don't live anywhere near the rest of my family.

I'm not planning on making her pump out litter after litter until she keels over -- I can keep them separated when I expect her to be going into heat, and it only lasts a couple of weeks. One litter for certain, maybe two or three litters at most.

> I come from a diehard spay/neuter family
I really dislike that, TBQPH. We control almost everything in our pets' lives, from their food to when they go to the bathroom to whether they get to go for a walk. Cutting out their sexual organs so that they won't ever even think about sex is just gruesome.

"Oh, but then they won't get testicular cancer!" Remove their brains and then they won't ever get brain cancer. "I don't want them humping my leg!" Why not get a goldfish instead?

>I wouldn't be able to deal with the shunning that would ensue from my parents.
Would they assume you're having sex with the dogs if you got intact ones, or would that only be because they were demanding that you spay/neuter them?

I mean, my mother thinks the worst of absolutely everything I do ("you're going out to buy drugs!" "no mom, you raging mentally ill bitch, I'm getting dinner"), but even she doesn't go that far.

You could always TELL them that they're spayed/neutered -- how would they know the difference? Vets implant plastic "neuticles" in dogs nowadays so they look like they still have their balls; the female would have to get pregnant, or they'd have to visit while she was in heat. Maybe you could just say that the vet must have missed some of the ovarian tissue? It happens. And if she managed to sneak out and get pregnant, there are drugs now to stop the pregnancies, just like "Plan B" and "RU486".

Labs are always best dogs.

I'll just adopt whatever's cute and well behaved
>already house-trained
>already know it's demeanor as an adult
>get credit from normies for "saving" the dog
>cheap

getting a real dog.

>>24607116
A dog that serves the community

>>24608755
you don't really pick dogs when you save them they pick you you just meet and that's it

>>24608957
I adopted a dog once and I had like 20 to pick from

I already have my make it dog. This is her.

Do rich people dogs exist?

I live in a the middle class suburbs and golden retrievers or golden doodles are the norm.

>>24609001
those are probably pure-breds from breeders, those are make it dogs, just depends on preference.

When I read this thread and no one bats an eye I'm starting to wonder how widespread dog fucking is..

>>24609001
You can spend a fortune on almost any breed. Some of the breeders out there are charging thousands of dollars for a puppy. Championship bloodlines, or just an unusual breed like picrelated.

>>24609055
A lot of people have "experimented" at it at some point in their lives. Some keep doing it. Some of us love it. We aren't going to talk about it in public because in every U.S. state they will prosecute you for it, whether under a specific statute for bestiality or under a generic "animal abuse" law. And when they prosecute you, they will confiscate your best friend and lover and will kill him/her because they prohibit you from owning a dog ever again, and "the dog is ruined and cannot be adopted out because of its behavior". Oh no, the dog had sex, better slit its throat, yay Jesus is happy now, another sacrifice for the Blood God.

So that's why we're not chatting about it over drinks after work, then inviting you over for a threesome if you seem intrigued by it.

I don't talk about it with friends or family. I've met three other singles who do it, and one couple. It used to be legal in Washington state, where I met most of them, so it was at least possible to talk about it without getting prosecuted and seeing your dogs killed. That's no longer the case, and I doubt they would have admitted it nowadays even if I guessed and asked.

>>24607657
>biz newfags
>biz oldfags

>>24607677
Doesn't getting licked by a cat hurt like shit?

>>24607116
Guys, I really fucking miss my ex-girlfriend dachshund. She was a miserable single mother with a great body who went on psych pharms and deleted her personality. How do I rescue the dog without getting arrested?

>>24609563
*Ex-girlfriend's

>no mention of the rottweiler or the newfoundland
shame on biz

>>24608452
>>24608640
Interesting answers. Basically asexual so I'm not really trying to fuck dogs, but I'm also against unnecessary genital alteration and wouldn't be opposed to giving my a dog a handy now and again if that's what it takes to keep him on the level. Certainly seems like the less abusive choice when the alternative is slicing his balls off.

Bullmastiff is my made-it dog... big goofy chunky bro-dog who's still fit enough to go on moderate walks and fearsome enough to scare off home invader. I would even prefer a Boerboel but from lots of reading they just seem like way too aggressive/strongheaded of a breed, especially unaltered. I would at least like to be able to take my dog out to the dog park on occasion which I think is doable with a bullmastiff if they're well socialized, but probably not with a boerboel.

>>24608755
No-one gives you credit for cheaping out on a mongrel lmao

Best breed ever is the golden doodle.
Amazing quirky personality and forever loving.
Hypoallergenic too.

For me, it's the Heeler.
Will be right at home on my homestead

>>24609624
Rotts are very good boys and thankfully their genes have stopped getting fucked up by trailer trash ever since pitbulls proved better at being roided up indiscriminate murder machines. Honestly rotties are what pit mommies wish their shitbulls actually were: a musclebound goofball who wouldn't hurt a fly unless that fly was attacking you with a baseball bat.

Picking one up next week bros

Cost me $2500 dollary doos. Is this a good investment?

>>24607257
you get 2 real dogs first then get a cutie dog

Walking down the street with this dog will get you more pussy than any other dog.

Shiba Inu + Husky + Golden Retriever + Samoyed cloud

>>24607429
this

>>24607296
This but also train him as a murder dog as well as a sweet baby

>>24609530
That's a meme. Their tongue will wear down on your skin and eventually burn it but only if you let them lick the same spot for minutes on end. It's like rubbing a piece of sandpaper on your skin with moderate pressure: uncomfortable but bearable for short durations.

>>24607225
A mix would have better genetic makeup than inbred purebreds.

>>24607257
Faggot big dogs are loud stupid and annoying

>>24610878
Who needs pussy when you have a full-sized French poodle?

>>24609867
Thanks; I just feel so sorry for dogs. They give us love, and we remove their ability to have sex.

>>24607345
Labradoodles are awesome.

A couple of dogo Argentinos to hold down the property. An amstaff to hold down the interior house.

For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff are so friendly and more than willing to oblige.
One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!".
Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs.
I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant.

>>24607429
i miss her so much. my first doggo :(

>>24607657
Golden retrievers are the sweetest dogs on the planet. My brother's passed away almost 20 years ago. I miss that silly girl.

>>24609000
checked and based snowbunny

>>24610471

>>24610681
based, for me it's between these and golden retriever

>>24612056
>meme vs reality
this is a jewish woman and she is behind banning pitbulls and all other powerful breeds in the US and Canada

>>24608543

>>24607858
Based berner poaster

>>24609000
Based berner poaster

Great swiss mountain dog, best friend!

>>24607116
Cavalier King Charles

>>24610687
Depends on if you want a dog that thinks it's a 15 year old human

Might get two for the castle

>>24607116
oh my god i love heckin doggos

the superior choice is the belgian shepherd Groenendael