/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>23212114
If you are quitting, how are you getting severance?

>>23212114
Say that someone sexually abused you at the company and you heard them say racist things don't need to drop a name or anything, he will give you the severance to avoid billion dollar pr disaster

Assert dominance. Stand up during the meeting. Interrupt your boss. And ask for way more than you can get. And if something goes down, redirect blame from self, preferably onto Janet

Basically be every female in the workplace today

>>23212114
Walk in wearing a pair of Daisy Dukes, singing "damn I feel like a woman".

>>23212163
yes. See op? This is good way to assert dominance

>>23212131
Im on a pip, haven’t told them about the new offer so i’m playing dumb and hoping they take the bait for a chance at no lawsuit.

>>23212114
Ah, you've seen the livestream on last Saturday, too.

>>23212114
Tell them "I believe this company is not paying me what I'm worth. For this reason, I'm leaving"

>>23212114
What do you mean by severance? Like them paying you for quitting or some sort of employee ownership?

>>23212521
Nevermind. Saw the second post.

"I got an offer from another company, paying me $10k more. If you are willing to match it, I'll stay."
You got nothing to loose, just be ballsy.

>>23212422
Based and same

>>23213604
>If you are willing to match it, I'll stay
That's some chick shit bro. Ask for at least $30k raise

>>23213604
Fuck that. I hate interviewing so much that if I’ve bothered getting another offer I’m beyond done with the current place.

>>23213715
Calm your mind dude. Don't argue. Don't attack. Become their friend and make them want to do what you want.

>>23213754
That works if you lead with it, but by the time someone has a vendetta against you you have to just leave.

>>23213715
Yeah at that point if you have actively interviewed and looked for other opportunities, you pretty much made up your mind that you are done with the current place. Don't be complacent

Based I got it, hahahhahahaha

>>23214157
Got what? How much?

>>23214213
Severence, 3 weeks, i get to leave this job earlier than two weeks. Also I start my next job EoM so a vacation and money ahahahhahahhaa.

>>23214245
How did you get severance? I don't get it...

>>23212422
>>23214157
>>23214245
fucking based op, legendary, poo on the wagecucks

>>23214245
Based. Fuck those wagies

>>23214270

this. you usually get severence when you're laid off. not when you're leaving the company for a new job. OP is LARPing ass faggot

>>23214270
I told you i’m on a PIP, company wants me out anyway. I had a meeting with my boss and alluded I was willing to walk away. Save them from some admin task, said some bs shit like it for health. Now I got an agreement saying I stay on the week, they pay me for 3 weeks, and boom i get severence a new job waiting for me and two weeks to chill out.

>>23214376
I just told you i’m on a PIP.

>>23214382
Nothing in writing. You won't get shit.

>>23214382
Fucking real-life chad here

>>23212157
Don't forget to show your support for BLM.

>>23214414
What point of I want to leave this job and be fully rested for the next company. I was more than willing to be termed on the spot.

What is a PIP? something for disabled losers?

>>23214546
Needs improvement on your yearly performance review

>>23214546
Corporate speak for giving an impossible task to wage slave so they fail and can be terminated

>>23214546
its a yellow card but in the office

So basically your company decided it's better to pay you for 2 weeks of doing nothing and be done with you, than to continue your employment because you obviously suck at your job. They're probably throwing a party the second you walk out of there.

>>23214680
Why are you jelly bro, it works out for both end. It was a toxic work environment anyway.

If I had just quit I would have paid them back my signing bonus, now I even get to avoid that. It called negotiating learn it and stop being a wagecuck.

>>23212163
Walk in wearing a pair of Dixie Boots, singing "damn I feel like kicking a nigger".

>>23213674
agreed, don't swing for the fence, swing for the parking lot.

>>23213604
What the fuck... you go through all the effort of interviewing and burn a bridge at the new company just to stay even? What a cuck move

>>23214723
You did good m8, just be wary of the release they’ll try and get you to sign

>>23213604
Shit advice. Never accept a counteroffer. Its like dating

>>23215215
Kek I just got an email now asking to confirm my resignation date. I think i’ll wait till my call with HR to confirm it, if not i’ll confirm it at the end of the day. Sneaky , sneaky.

>>23215315
Expect sheisterism, but yeah it sounds like you’re fine regardless having another job already lined up. Once upon a time in a similar situation I gave up two weeks of severance rather than signing a blanket release. Was worth it imo just to deny them that little bit of peace of mind

>>23212114
you should quit eating rather than quit your job because holy shit what a fat fuck

what does PIP even stand for... gay?

>>23215964
Personal improvement plan. It means OP was about to get fired, but he wiggled his way out

>>23216147
Now that just makes me seem like a bad worker, this PIP was shit the moment I’ve been on it.

Typically in big tech/consulting/finance/other knowledge work, when you put in your 2 weeks they walk you out that day, and just pay you to stay home for 2 weeks. It's a liability to keep you around where you might fuck something up (especially if you were already on notice for poor performance).

Even if they don't do that, the 2 week period is a joke and you're basically getting paid time off. You're not going to do any work anyway, what are they going to do fire you? lol