/biz/ - Business & Finance

WAKE ME UP INSIDE

>>18069911
So yeah was getting into investing two days ago during the big dip a good idea?

First for newfrens getting blown out at record speed

>>18069911
Buying with 60% of my portfolio x5 SDOW after after DoW opening today, good luck anons.

AMD Chads staying strong

Don't worry guys. The boomers have spoken.

>>18069930
technically the best buy timing would have been some time on Friday
getting into investing at any time is a good idea.

>>18069940
I think that you're messing up a good thing. If you make more realistic investing decisions, the stock market can be very rewarding. Just buy stocks in good companies. That's all it takes

>HE DIDN'T BUY THE DIP

>>18069930
I sold yesterday because I expected a drop the this/next week AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Thinking of buying ROK

Unemployment numbers priced in?

>>18069940

Good luck mate. I think we may see 22K on the DOW and perhaps 2600-2700 on the S&P in the short term, but the time to short again is coming.

Anyone else short the bottom or am i the only retard here?

>>18069960
/biz/ - hindsight manifest.

Any econ majors want to explain how the efficient portfolio frontier makes sense in this economy? What's the point in diversifying with oil and bonds when they're at all time lows?

>>18069982
yup

So they're going to pass $2 trillion every week?

>>18069989
Bro, tomorrow is going to be up 20% on open.

>didn't buy the bottom
>lost 10k
>Forced into becoming a sissy bottom for money
>Found bulls on the biz discord chat
>A bull in the sexual and business sense
>Getting topped now by chad bulls who laugh at me while I get topped >throw single dollar bills are me for being a sissy bear
>Humiliated sexually and financially

Feels good man

what stock to buy now? Coca Cola? ExxonMobil? Disney?
Or just an MSCI World ETF?

>>18069930
gains come mostly from machines, I wouldn't even buy now

is this a bull trap?

>>18069998
>oh look a bearcuck
COPE

>>18069991

It doesn't. If you want to get rich quickly, you either invest narrowly (buy an individual stock or commodity and hope like hell it appreciates) or you invest broadly with leverage (buy or short an index with leverage).

If you track the market, you'll never be rich.

Shell is going crazy

>more nations on lockdown
>no foreseeable relief
>Boeing is pumping

this is truly a clown world

>>18070014
It's been a BEAR trap since march, bearfag

>>18069968
Thank you for your service, my portfolio GROWS

Is it a good idea to buy boeing stocks right now? Or should I wait 1-2 weeks?

>>18070005
>>18069960
dont worry well retest the lows soon

>>18070024
https://summit.news/2020/03/23/czech-republic-says-it-may-keep-borders-closed-for-2-years/

>>18069982

Literally everything is priced in.

DOW 30K by the end of April, screencap this

US IS GOING TO BE A ZOMBIE ECONOMY LIKE JAPAN HAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAhahahhahaa

Also why the FUCK are Autozone shares 800+

>>18069986
Been shorting (well, buying and selling bearish options) since feb 27 and was up quite a bit falling volatility and Jerome’s magic printer wipes out all my gains. It sucks but I’m still beating the market

>>18070024
>ATH by end of month
COPE
COPE
COPE
>>18070032
>dont worry well retest the lows soon
COPE

>>18069991
>What's the point in diversifying with oil and bonds when they're at all time lows?
because they're at all time lows?

When the queen dies, that'll cause a 10% drop, at least on the FTSE . She's 93 anyway

>>18070024
Real life events dont matter now. If every human died there would still be a fed printer going buying assets up off the market. The fed is literally saying they will buy anything now and trump doesnt care what that means long term as long as the markets up for election year.

>>18070028
it's a poorly run company now, and it will still be a poorly run company in two weeks
that's just IMO though

>>18070036
but if it was really priced in, wouldn't the DOW be 30K right now? think about it

>>18070033
https://www.rte.ie/news/coronavirus/2020/0324/1126051-italy-coronavirus/

new fucking high death count in italy, but everything is mooning - deluded stock market - i am putting my money where my mouth is

>>18070069

Bear C O P E

>>18070046
send them an email and ask them to do a share split so you can buy
the worst that they can say is no

>>18070062
fuck off and don't post about they queen dying ever again

Be careful, today every work of human whether it is finance, education, shopping etc is done through internet but is the Internet safe enough, we are changing our currency in decentralized manner similarly we need to change our internet into decentralized protocol there are very few firms in world working on it one of them is Tachyon protocol they have exciting products which have good potential in future to grow.

good idea to buy ExxonMobil now?

>>18070076
DEATHS ARE LAGGING INDICATOR
NEW CASES ARE SLOWING

C O P E
O
P
E

>>18070021
This also makes no sense, explain the Shell moon pls.

Is this just bulls pumping bulls who then trigger more bulls?

Hope you guys bought bullets

>>18070090
I was thinking about it too anon. Waiting for my deposit to clear though before I can buy jack shit

>>18070056
>COPE
not at all my friend i wish you all the best. imo it will move up to 23000 then for some reason, the market will come up with something, well see it going down to around 20000

When does the ride end

im tired

>>18070064
so how does all the pumping effect real life?

>>18069911
my binance margin is at 1.16 from a short at 125$ ETH
Do i add more funds or will it not go down to that level anymore and should i just take my 2k loss?

ooooo

>>18070101
>well see it going down to around 20000
WRONG. When it moves up to 23000, you know what happens next?
IT BLASTS STRAIGHT THROUGH IT TO SPY 400

>>18070108
I can't decide if I want to try and do a call or put on disney. It's impossible to tell if the pump is gonna keep going because of the infinite printer, or if reality will set in and it will dump again

>>18070111
Boomers get higher 401ks.

>>18070097
You know it

>>18070098
just bought it
hope I don't regret

>>18070108
>>18070124
Didn't mean to reply

>>18070046
The only important thing about the us are tech companies and they produce in asia anyways

>>18070090
BP doesn't make money refining oil unless crude is at $55 a barrel. I dunno where they are relative to other players in that industry but I'd imagine the other big boys are taking a loss until it gets to about that point as well. Btw is this info available anywhere?

>Yesterday and today before the jobs report tomorrow

>>18070005
why do you use discord faggot? that's what you get for using discord.

>>18070097
Empty them in your pee brain, bearfag
It may be hard to hit

The stimulus bill passed at night btw. $1200 stimulus checks when no one wants to leave the house should be interesting.

>>18070152
Discord is comfy. It's also a good place for newfags to ask questions.

Reminder this will be the last chance to milk the cows

>>18070150
JOBS REPORT ARE NEXT WEEK RETARD

>>18070024
they are fucking buying their own stock back with the money from fed anon, don't fall for it, they will dump it on the peasants and make them lose their 1200 trumpbux.

>>18070062
>people who care for promies, royal cunts or the kardashnians
>people who care for numbers and money
Shurely those are not the same people

>>18070144
what about our fast food and our national parks?

>>18070157
Money printer go brrr doesn't resolve the people dropping dead in the streets issue

>>18070144
Nigga there will always be cars.

>>18070024
P.S. if anything this means those faggots struck a deal with the government for a potential bailout. kinda bullish longterm.

BASED JEROME AND MNUCHIN FIGHTING THE VIRUS WITH LIQUIDITY

CHINESE VIRUS BTFO'D

>>18070186

It'll just cause massive disruption, also markets dont like sudden change

>>18070191
Uh yes it does. it literally makes stonks go up. also dead people can't liquidate

The fuck happened to these guys?

>>18070163

AMAZON STOCKS TO $99999

>>18070205
Inoperable

>>18070179
It's always Thursday. People are just coping because Trump said in a conference he hoped they wouldn't release the numbers.

>>18070220
C O P E
O
P
E

NO CUSTOMERS NO INVESTORS INFINITE MONEY ADAMANTIUM HYPER-DIMENSIONAL QUANTUM BULL RUN INITIATED. MARKET GOES UP FOREVER BECAUSE NOW THERE ARE NO CUSTOMERS TO LOSE AND NO EMPLOYEES TO PAY. SIMPLY PUMP STOCKS TO INFINITY WITH ENDLESS US DOLLARS.

GENTLEMEN.

WE HAVE ENTERED A POST SCARCITY FUTURE. CONGRATULATIONS.

>>18070207
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/milestone-mist-alert-johnson-fistel-030800415.html

Ah that’s what happened

>>18070213
For real, it's gonna be like a direct cash injection for them

>>18070226
YEAH APRIL 2ND

>>18070179
Please use a trip so I can filter you

>>18070230
The point is that you're going to need those bullets even if the fed somehow does manage to kike itself out of this. Maybe ESPECIALLY if it does that.

What is the 100% most based and redpilled position on this Wednesday 3/25/2020

I think it’s going to be green, and I am all in JNUG. Please respond and tell me the enlightened path

I N F I N I T E

M O N E Y

>>18070233
it all makes sense now

Hehehe JPM just upgraded KHC to "overweight" since everyone's eating at home. "Overweight" kekkies

>>18070189
>fast food
Its the worst in the world
>national parks
The north American continent has a beautiful nature, pls dont destroy it
>>18070195
Maybe
But not fords and Chryslers
American cars are known for shit quality around the globe
Tesla might have a chance because it trys to automate as much as possible
>>18070204
Why?

>>18070272

>Tesla might have a chance because it trys to automate as much as possible

Tesla is a meme in a world of $24 oil.

>>18070245
>I NEED A ECHO CHAMBER OF BEARFAGS JERKING ME OFF
COPE
>>18070259
Wrong, stock repurches
>japa-
wrong, we are backed by oil

>>18070265
NO. THEY ARE NOT UPSET. THEY NEED TO BE SMUG.

I had a history professor in uni tell us that the U.S. dollar is actually backed by tanks and guns. Kill two birds with one stone and slap some Arabs around and fix the gas prices anyone?

>>18070288
Hell yeah

>>18070284
I'm talking about the lung-shredding pandemic that we're getting tossed out onto the street in, genius.

>>18070272
>>fast food
>Its the worst in the world
post what country you're from so that we can invade you

>>18070299
bro, WARM WEATHER

>>18070288
That's bullshit though. That implies that if Germany decided to move away from US dollar to, say, Japanese yen, US army is going to start a war with Germany. It's not. All of those tanks and guns do nothing to stop civilized countries from selling US dollars, they can stop Iran and Syria and that's about it.

>>18070310
Bro, Florida

Let's fight the giant bubble in the market by pumping more air in it! Thank you Jerome!

>>18070308
It's pretty yucky my man, that being said purchase MCD corporation please
>>18070288
It's backed by nukes, the Anglo-American Establishment's plans for a new Atlantis, and the immortal heritage of John Dee's pact with the Angels :o

>>18070315
Yes but fuck florida, florida dying is literally bullish

>>18070283
Do you understand WHY oil is so cheap and that it wont stay that way?
What happens when most anglo oil companies are broke?
The oilpricewar is over and oil will be higher than before, with sauds and Russia massively profiting

>>18070310
Warm weather can slow the spread as long as people aren't filthy. But we're filthy. See florida.

>>18070298
why is it that only bulls use the memes of wojaks hugging and being gay. kinda makes you think.

Absolute fucking retardation

>>18070333
I feel like the highest and least risk returns are form longing oil. It looks more guaranteed than T-bills.
I was wondering just how bad is contango for USO? I was trying to compare it to the price of oil but I couldn't find an "oil price indicator" on tradingview.

>>18070226
Looks like from US Labor website jobs report isnt until April 3rd for March data. First Friday of each month.

>>18070331
You know what. I think you're right.

6 trillion stimulus promised and Dow is up 2% wow. They’re pushing a rope uphill

Futures seem to not be ready for 2500 just yet...
will we retest before market open?

>>18070376
don't be dumb...stimulus was already priced in, one of the only things priced in already

So it's safe to assume it's stabilized now?

>>18070373
https://www.dol.gov/newsroom/releases?agency=All&state=All&topic=132&year=all

>>18070385
stabilization was priced in
so we have to assume that the markets will irrationally pump and then dump

>>18070382
>will we retest
Yeah we're retesting back to ATH

>>18070386
Yeah did some googling. Apparently jobs report isnt the same as weekly unemployment claims. Thanks anon my puts are safe for a while longer.

is this a big ol bear trap on dax right now

>>18070382
Volume profile gets thinner at 2500 exactly, seems like we've been unwilling to stay there exactly going both up and down. Seems like we'll go higher if we cross it

Lol bears really are pathetic people

>>18070419
delusional bullfag

The bull will run and tire itself but the bear has yet to roar the loudest.

>>18070330
>John Dee
I have a pet theory is that John Dee never really existed, or that there wasn't just one singular person named that.
but the theory is still in early development, I have a lot of sources still to cover

Certainly the things that were posthumously published are most suspect

>>18070439
>The bull will run and tire itself but the bear has yet to roar the loudest.
look at this gay corny shit, retard bearfag

>>18070451

I'm actually long right now.

>>18070358
>missed out on buying them at $5 a share
I was going to put in $200 but was dragging my feet making my robinhood account, so I could have made $600 in a fucking week. I'll carry this sin to my grave

bought Shell last week and today ExxonMobil and Coca Cola
did I do good?

>>18070469
what are you? A FUKIN BOOMER?
Buy KHC while you're at it

sing with me dax-bearbros
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lWJXDG2i0A

Shoult I BUY BUY BUY?? What's going on in US? Still coronovirus panic?

Imagine being bullish on onetime handouts. On millions of lost jobs. On increasingly insane measures barely pumping anything anymore. The Feds are criminals.

>>18070496
i dont trust it yet, there is some hidden ((trickery))

>>18070517
you mean like it going up for no reason at all after monday crash?

>>18070451
You know what faggot? When the bobros were saying that they hope some bullfags killed themselves I defended bullfags. But I'm starting to understand why my brethren said that. You will cry your eyes out tomorrow, just so you know. We will see some spectacular shit later this week.

>>18070517

It's a central bank liquidity pump and fiscal stimulus. It was always going to push markets up.

The question now is whether Coronachan can spread fast and hard enough to counteract it.

Sqqq bros report in :(

>>18070525
well yes, and everyone was expecting a dump, now there is dump, too rational

>>18070358
Dave and Busters is one of those companies hit the hardest from this. Even with Trump saying people will go back to work(which might not happen)people will still be wary of places like this. Nothing more than a dead cat bounce

>This market
https://youtu.be/TZVy1PPQOhU

>>18070465
you bought the top again, congratulations.

>>18070450
I think there's ample historical evidence that Dee (or really Johannes/Jonas Day, as he should be called) was a real person, but he was def part of the complex of Bacon/Marlowe/Bruno/Shakespeare and whoever else was mixed up in court statecraft and spying. I think the ambiguity of who was actually doing and calling themselves what was probably pretty useful. London must have seemed like they had tons of galaxy brain mystic scientist writers :o
I think Edward Kelley was definitely a real guy, must have been hilarious seeing this perpetually drunk turbo-grifter just rambling to the most powerful people on earth about angels

does it make sense to short hotels now ? mgm is going fuckin parabolic

>>18070535
uwu

>>18070533
it's the corporations buying their own stock, with the money they got on a 0% interest from the gooberment. And delusional bullfags enthusiastically jumping in on the green candle leading them straight into the pit of despair yet again.

LOL oil is going up. That means trump has fucked with the African and South American oil market.

This rally is going to be epic. Screencap this post

>>18070535
hodl, it will moon in the next couple of days.I unironically believe it will retest the previous high.

>>18070535
Right here. We will never see $24 again after this eternal bull rally

>>18069911
Well, I was completely wrong and SQQQ got fucked in the premarket, guess it's time to kill myself.

If the bill stalls in the house for whatever reason I'm going to freak the fuck out

>>18070579
We need one more little panic about the beer flu, then it's nothing but rally time all summer long.

im also considering buying some calls on Italian index

>>18070569
>>18070579

we need to reach the bottom first bullfags

I dumped $10k into SQQQ yesterday morning

>>18070605
Just don’t look at it for six hours anon, go for a run, fuck your wife a few times

>>18070564

Money printer still goes BRRRRRR and it fucking works in relation to asset prices.

Again, this shit needs to get REALLY moving for the next leg down.

Something out of China perhaps. Either the virus again or China puts increased pressure on the USA in some manner.

Why is this so fucking difficult, I've been spending the past 2 weeks sitting on a pile of cash waiting for the right time to put it in.
UP 11%
DOWN 20%
UP 33%
FOR NO GOOD REASON. DRUMPF LIES - THE MARKET BOOMS. SOMETHING GOOD HAPPENS -- MARKET DUMPS. WHAT THE FUCK AM I MEANT TO DO IT'S ALL SO RIGGED NOTHING IS BASED ON ACTUAL MATHS OR LOGIC IT'S JUST BULLSHIT

>>18070606
That bill is nothing but pure communism. The can't vote until Friday - they need to
1. ratchet up the fear to ram it through
or
2. play things as cool and not pass it, tanking the economy for political gain.

Dont fight the FED

>>18070579
ah yes because the market rebounded and mooned right after TARP

this package just gives the buying volume that rich mfers can use to fill their sell orders rather than dumping in a crashing market

>>18070630

If you fly an aeroplane without understanding the instruments to guide you, it's going to be blind luck that you arrive at your destination.

Identify support levels that will act as likely rebound points. This pump was always going to happen, it's just as what point.

premarket is dipping, probably another crab day incoming

>>18070606
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2020/03/25/coronavirus-live-updates-stimulus-deal-done-us-deaths-stocks-trump/2909339001/

It's already done you ape

>>18070619
Just sit tight for a few days.

>>18070644
why do you think the fed cares about your SPECULATIONS that stocks will go up? Aren't they really telling you there will be a recession? Are you delusional?

DAX dropped 4% in 10 mins

dumb has begun

>>18070668
foreign stock indexes are up based on the stimulus news

COME ON

>the Chad Nikkei
>The Virgin Bond

>>18070682
>>18070685
HMMMMM

>>18070671
Do you know how our government works? It still needs to be roll called in the senate and then the house and then signed by the president.
Party leaders writing the bill and agreeing to the terms down't mean it instantly becomes a law.

THE CHECK I'M GETTING IS WORTH MORE THAN MY PORTFOLIO NOW FUCK YOU /BIZ/ THE ONE TIME I LISTEN TO YOU AND GO ALL-IN ON PUTS I NEED TO GET BAILED OUT BY THE GOVERNMENT LIKE I'M A CORPORATION.

>>18070682
not buying it, its probably a big fat trap

the fuck happened to zoom

>>18070695
going against it is political suicide

>>18070703
>Price-Earnings Ratio
>1.87K

>>18070685
What kind of honk levels are we at where the US wants to give bailouts to companies for shutting down for 2 weeks in the US and Euro markets are that effected?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHUbLv4ThOo

>>18070692
>>18070685

>>18070469
it depends what do you call "good" ?
You wonder about future that no one knows for sure.
But I can count mathematical probability that what real investors do.
Coca Cola harm a lots of people, there is countries in Africa where Coca Cola is creeper then clean water. Devil loves it and always reword with his mark those who do most harm.
most lucrative is to kill people, death, war, as much you can destroy as more you get reworded by crashing other peoples sculls.
That is financial guide to success not spiritual one. Other ways you need to stop being grabber and start be creationist , build, grow , feed , breed ... make life more wonderful for people around and you will not die of hunger.
Create family, vehicle of happiness and do not disturb new people coming in this world.

>>18070695
if mcconnel and schumer agree to something, its pretty rare you get dissent in the chamber
they just follow what they say
im pretty sure we'll have the 60 votes needed to pass perhaps with one dem filing a protest vote for memes, maybe sanders so he can stay relevant

>Right side of chest hurts

>>18070723
the deal was announced 4 hours ago lad

>>18070723
its red now

>>18070730
Anxiety

>>18070729
>Unemployment is priced in
>Stimulus isn't

Can you fucking bulls ever get your stories straight

>>18070729
>4 hours
thats like yesterday, if that wasnt your point

WHY IS IT DUMPING WHY WHY TRUMP SORT IT OUT PRINT FUCKING MONEY

>>18070731
Based

>Vix ticking back up
>Russel near negative
Huh

>>18070751
red day
>green day
red day
>green day
red day
>green day
red day
>green day
red day
>green day
red day
>green day
red day
>green day

'e bought?

Kek

>>18070569
It isn't going up, are you even looking at it?

>>18070717
should i just dump it before it goes lower?

Are we crabbing?

>>18070723

NO NO NO NO

WE GOT TOO COCKY BULLBROS

>>18070724
at last I truly see...

Despite my best efforts I still managed to be cucked by the market.

What the fuck

>>18070760
pretty based desu

I'm about to premarket order 15 grand of SPXL (3x leveraged bull)

How's my day gonna be tomorrow?

>>18070773
yes

BULL???
BEAR???

>>18070811
either good or not. you can gamble on all on red too

S&P IS NEGATIVE

>>18070803
3 scoops

>>18070682
>>18070751
>>18070773
>>18070792
>>18070806
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61Q6wWu5ziY

fasten ur seatbelts bois

>>18070819
Thanks for your non-answer. I APPRECIATE IT

>>18070826
-20% Today

I'm eating prime rib tonight

>>18070828
You gotta do at least 4 scoops man.
COME ON LETS GET BIGGG
COME ONNNNNN

>>18070833
This video is why I'm afraid of buying. I fear the bog

don't fight it, embrace the fed

I got bogged two times today

REEE 2 green days

I need them to drop lower, I'm not ready to buy yet.

New Coronavirus server on a free speech platform & extensive /Biz/ section
Trannies forever BTFO

guilded gg/Coronavirus

>>18070811
historically the days with the largest % gains lead to, or are part of, huge drops. yesterday was the 5th largest % gain in a day ever.
of course that doesn't guarantee a red day today but it would suggest one or more are coming and that they'll be big. but then also no one can predict the future so fuck knows :) anything is a gamble at this point

Jerome was a full to pump on a Tuesday. He's summoned the blackest of all market days. Black Wednesday

Red day please I want to stock up on Uber and Virgin Galactic.

>>18070718
It's all connected, independent banks don't exist anymore. They have all spread the cancer of derivatives amongst themselves.

We're opening down today.

Any way I can sell my soxl and some calls before the dump?

Note that there are hedge funds that buy both btc and stocks and either sell or buy both.

Thus, you see btc and spy correlate with each other often during this covid crisis.

Every giant Bitcoin movement I've seen has been matched by spy movement in the same direction.

Btc just started a mega dump, means spy is likely fucked as soon as premarket starts.

How do we profit from this?

RED CRAB

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waffle_House_Index#See_also

>>18070881
By the time this year is over we are gonna have everyday of the trading week being black and all top 5 daily gainers both percent and single point. This volatility is something.

Hey allan brito i know you lurking

>>18070806
+20% day today. Honk.

>>18070873
Same.
I bought last week and sold yesterday. Made some good gains. Waiting to enter for long position

>>18070730
Unironically buy yourself that foam roller that's popular and roll your back, legs, and in this case chest on that shit, it has done wonders for these kind of pains. Set up a pull up bar, to either hang there and decompress your spine, or to do pull ups if you're strong enough.

how about next time we do 20 trillion so the market can stay up for more than a few hours.

I have a buy order for a $101 strike call on Disney. Should I cancel it? I placed it back when it looked like it was still going to be a green day

>>18070849
>Making your financial gains and physical gains big
is there anything more based?

open red today if not for another mega pump on the level of monday 8am

>>18070941
>Fed announces infinity QE + 1

>>18070923
>I have a buy order for a $101 strike call on Disney
why would you do that.. lol

>>18070941
>>18070903
Btc says we open red

>>18070912
this is so fucking bullish. today 10% plus over all markets would be the rational move

>>18070005
How can I join the discord?!?

>>18070957
Puts were expensive and Disney was looking like it was going to open green

>>18070954
>infinty + 1
anon.... i..

>>18070912
>if we don't tell them how fucked we are our stock won't suffer
how is this legal?

reminder that all new /pol/ frenz should find a discord to fuck off to. Some guy will post his own later and you should just go there. Alternatively you guys can start your own /smg/ on /pol/. You can name it something like semite market general if you want, I'm sure your fellow poltards will appreciate it.

>>18070903
This goes for people who use this fucking dumb spacing too. Are you the guy that spams threads talking about how the R0 factor changes with temperature too? Why can't you guys type something into a paragraph?

>>18070964
chop of your penor.

>>18070978
infinity + 1 is the same as infinity yes
This emphasizes the futility of their scheme
Jerome's pump mania is futile

Attention all bullfags, after your smug display of arrogance earlier I just want to inform you that your little pump is over. God emperor threw everything at the markets, the democrats and republicans actually managed to reach an agreement, and yet you still lose. You will continue losing in the foreseable future. FUCK YOU.

>>18070961
>futures dumping after stimulus agreement reached

doubt it

>>18070990
cringe and unbased.
may your portfolio suffer.

>>18071000
checked and bobopilled!

Remember when the fed lowered rates to 0?

bring it on panicking boomers

I waited 11 years just to miss the bottom again...

>>18071000
thank you bobo, my SQQQ calls depend on you

>>18071044
we are about a month out from the bottom

>>18071044
>missed the bottom again

Doubt it

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>18071015
> breached protective gear
rip

>>18071044
I am feeling this too but it CAN'T be the bottom yet, this is bull trap trickery

>>18071044
you didn't miss it, the bottom is much lower anon, just stay fucking patient. People haven't even started jumping out of windows en masse, when the flight of the bulls ends. we become the new bulls finishing the cycle.

>>18071078
you mean this is fed niggery

>>18070927
6 hours arm workouts

massive massive manipulation, smg is the new crypto now

>>18071082
by the time this is over the bulls with be castrated

>he bought
>again

Reminder that the bottom is when it turns into a crab market, not a bull market.

This happened literally every single time there was a huge drop in the market.

>>18071015
The man is telling Reddit spacing fags to fuck of. How is that unbased?

Ohhhhhhhhhhh Prince Charles has corona!

>>18071100
by the time this is over, there aren't going to be any bulls to castrate.

>MFW SPY dips below 200 today
Bulls thought they beat the system by following the Fed.
They forgot that everyone gets HONKED in clown world.

>>18071044
This is how the bottom looks like

>>18071108
NOOOOOOOOO not based Charlie

I guess the stimulus really was "priced in" already
The absolute state of bulls

>>18071108
He'll be fine once he consumes his daily surfeit of souls of white children today

>>18071133
>Small business loans only applicable for employee wages that were already being paid out for most of a year
I MISSED MY CHANCE TO SCAM THE FEDS AGAIN

VIX at 63 and rising

>>18071108
HOLY FUCK ITS REAL

>>18070990
We're here to stay, nigger

>>18071108
NOOOOO NOT MY HECKIN PEDO LORDINOSSSS

>europe was at about +5% today
>now it's going negative
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON ANONS

Ayo bobros ayo, check this shit out. THEY FUCKING BOUGHT THE TOP AGAIN.
AND THE FUCKING MOCKED US WHILE BUYING IT.

DJI future ....

>>18071166
PRINCE CHARLES HAS CORONA. WORLD LEADERS HAVE BEEN EXPOSED. NOBODY IS SAFE.

>>18071108
The prophecy is coming true. Soon it will strike down William and his heirs. Long Live King Archie!

>>18071106
isn't that literally what's happening now? Market has been bouncing randomly up and down for a week

>>18071152
>Look mom I said nigger!!
>And I posted my favorite cartoon, it has a Trump reference!!!

>>18071167
Stay classy /biz
buy high sell low

>>18071166
CLOWN MARKET
WE DON'T NEED PRODUCTION OR CONSUMERS
ALL SHALL BE DECIDED BY RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR
DOW IS 20K 1PM
DOW IS 720 2PM
DOW IS 800K 3PM
LOGIC IS UNNEEDED

>>18071108
he could unironically die. Probably like 10% chance.

>>18071179
Difference is how it's holding sizable trends in-between.

Global future

>>18071190
how old is he? more like 30%

>>18070685
>foreign stock indexes are up based on the stimulus news
OH NO NO NO ONO NO NO BAHAHAHAHAHA

>>18071108
IMAGINE waiting to be king for 50 fucking years only to croak because of a virus

>>18071167
I was really scared there for a minute

>>18071202
71 but will have best medical care money can buy, doubt he'll die. They will have an entire set of new organs on ice ready

>>18071181
>Mom, someone said the N word online, you have to stop them!
>I'm not a big boy who can just ignore no no words, others have to leave if they use them around me!

>>18070094
Yesterday it went up a bit, but Conte is locking down almost everyone and no one can go out, so yeah lets see today, if it goes down, I think it will be over by early-mid april
>t. Italian

Looks like they're gonna need to print 6 trillion every week.

>>18071108
Finally the Queen may rest in peace and not worry about leaving the kingdom to a complete retard

If Charles dies it will become the greatest bear run we have ever seen in our lives

>>18071221
No one is saying you have to stop it or that they are offended, it's just a bit crass and embarrassing. The same as if you posted 'CUNT CUNT CUNT' or something. It's pretty funny when you're a teenager though I guess.

>>18069911
For any swing trader, today is your day
I wish I knew how to buy stocks, I only look at graphs for pure fun

Crab
Death Spike
Circuit Breaker
Crab
Death Spike
Circuit Breaker
Crab
Death Spike
Circuit Breaker

>>18071166
okay i going to explain to you how this works since this is your first rodeo
the market goes down a bunch because there is a crisis, retards buy before it hits bottom and before the crisis is over, so it goes up again, after it starts back down again to it's bottom, retards buy again, so it goes up a little again.. etc etc... sooner or later it will hit its the bottom and crab walk.

>>18071236
nigger cunt is funny regardless of age

>>18071176
ofc the royals have corona. It is easily transmitted by children wich they are constantly fucking

Yes! They reached a deal with the "check bill". Soon... $2400 extra bucks will be dumped into my account.

>>18071257
>2020
>not having children
it's like you want us to go extinct

>Over 100 billion dollars that will just disappear into the hospital system
Bullish on healthcare

>>18071227
you idiots think is because some washed up royal that isn't even the heir to the throne anymore, has something to do with the market crashing. I'm fucking stunned biz.

>>18071257
Based inflationbux

>>18071269
And what happens when the doctors and nurses start dying?

>>18071271
He is an obvious poltard only here for le ebin red dildo

>>18071236
The post I was responding to was literally someone so ass hurt that they suggested anyone them deem to be the /pol/ boogeyman should leave and make their own /smg/ on /pol/ you illiterate retard.
It's fucking hilarious how people like you give the word nigger so much power.

>>18071271
you don't seem to understand the cuck mentality of the brits

>>18071247
>>18071166
What anon said. Basically the bottom is when retards also known as bulls, stop being themselves also known as retards. And jumping on every fucking green candle they can.

>>18071248
(Dude, you aren't supposed to tell us you are underaged)

>>18071279
are the doctors and nurses all 70 years old because otherwise they aren't going to start dying

VIX up to 67

>>18071271
its more like a prayer

>>18071185
We might as well start praying to RNGesus

So who's paying for the stimulus bill?

>>18071307
We are of course

>>18071248
It's really not

>>18071307
Jerome

BEARS ARE BACK, NO SURVIVORS THIS TIME

>Tempted to put SPY
>Premiums are fucking 300-600 for decent strikes
>Would feel like a retard if I lost that much on a single bet
I envy the people who have the confidence to just make a bet like that without constantly second guessing

>>18071307
Noone, they're just printing 100's like mad

haha money printer go brrrrr

Funny how bulls always vanish when it goes red. Bears stay strong even during the tough times.

How do i short nyc trannies

>>18071296
They are exposed to a heavier viral load. Chinese nurses and doctors in their 30's were still dying in wuhan.

>USA futures all red now
>EU stonks dumping
RUH ROH BULLS

>>18071307
Shhhhhh. It's a balanced budge .... It's comprehensive. Bipartisan, honey.

>>18071314
So we get only one check of 1200? And that's it? What the fuck is that going to do except help most retards just funnel it into drugs or some stupid shit.

>>18071306
why aren't you posting smug green wojaks? what happened? now it's RNGesus?

>>18071307
The brrrrrrrrrrrrrr machine

>>18071333
>>>18071314
>So we get only one check of 1200? And that's it? What the fuck is that going to do except help most retards just funnel it into drugs or some stupid shit.

It's not supposed to do anything, it's a bandaid

>>18071322
What do you expect from an animal pajeets consider holy.

>>18071333
Married it's 2400. Kids you get a bit more, 500 a kid.

>>18071333
>What the fuck is that going to do except help most retards just funnel it into drugs or some stupid shit.
That's the point though

>Top half of thread
BEAR COPE BEAR COPE COPE SEEEEEEEEETHEEEEEEE
>Now
*silence*

>Going red
Hehe. :3

>>18071337
>bandaid
More like a ball gag as they fuck us in the ass with the brrr machine.

>>18071357
they are thinking how they're going to explain to their parents what happened to their money, after they bought the top again.

>>18070233
>POST SCARCITY
No USD scarcity anymore
Infinity USD
Based and blackpilled NY Fed
Stocks up up and away
To Infinity and Beyond!

>>18071351
The fact that they aren't going to force people to use it to recirculate it back into the economy should have been a red flag of death. Watch it end up going to someone's favorite streamer.

>>18071290
I'm fine with pol in general, it's something you have to accept since it's the new /b/. I just prefer my poltards to be more than 20 yo and say more things than based, redpilled, and nigger kikes brrrrr.
But you can't deny smg volume has picked up greatly and the most likely place for the inflow is pol

>>18071360
>>18071357
They still have to openly announce the bill. Neither bears more bulls should be bragging about anything, because, this clown market can change on a whim.

I'm doing it bobros. I'm averaging down on SQQQ.

Most of mine's going into the bank. Gotta pay myself back. Remaining is going at my credit card (supply cost). I'll have maybe 130 left over.

Can someone take this image and make the wojak here green with horns on his head?

What a time to be alive.

>put all my money in big stable companies on monday
reminder to always to the opposite of what /biz/ is doing

Slightly off-topic, but does anybody know a good business studies textbook / online resource?

I do freelance work to pay for my investing, and although I have no background in business I've been given a task where I need to identify and define all of the different types of retail structure/hierarchy for large orgs (e.g. franchisor-franchisee, company-branch). Finding the definitions is easy, but I don't really know where to go to find an exhaustive list of all the different types of arrangements

>>18071377
>But you can't deny smg volume has picked up greatly and the most likely place for the inflow is pol
Once we crash to a recession it will be like the post crypto crash, dead board again. Things will get quiet again soon enough.

>>18071402
You say biz, but you should say /biz bulls. They are the retards. Bears having been going brrr harder than the fed in the last 30 days.

>>18071376
It's not something you can control. How would you "force" people to put it into the economy? Suspend checking and savings accounts? Give everyone a Walmart gift card instead? Say fuck normies and give it all to Boeing instead?

Reminder that the beer flu is a bioweapon that Pence personally released to wipe out the gays and further his anti-homo agenda.
Bye, bye Weimar!!!

OH NO NO NO
>STIMULUS WAS PRICED IN
>ANOTHER 20 PCT DECLINE

>>18071386
Haha that would be based

>>18071429
Should have given them the check but can only be used in the stock market is one way.

>>18071349
>Married is 2400
Isn't it still just 1200/person?

Cmon VIX to 100!

I'm pissed I missed out on my opportunity to buy SLV calls, my money in my TDA account wasn't available to trade with yet

>>18071448
Its ok buy 2021 calls

So you know thanks to that 2400 I'll screw the credit company outta fees, I'll pay myself back the self loan that I used to buy cheap stocks (which will pay off biggly in 20+ years), and I'll come out ahead on the deal with 130 left over. Win around.

>>18071444
They're going to have to do it through the IRS, so it's probably 1200 Single/Unmarried/Widower/Etc and 2400 Joint-Filed

These are completely sane numbers and will present no problems in the future

>>18071377
>stock market is crashing to ridiculous levels we haven't seen since 2008
>people are obviously flocking here because if they've never gotten into investing, now is a great time to buy some dirt cheap stocks
>CLEARLY THIS INFLUX OF PEOPLE IS POL
You can't deny that /pol/ is living rent free in your fucking head dude

>>18071167
buy high sell low

Why 2021? I'm new to options trading, the IV is rather high rn and don't want it to kill me

>>18071490
I mean you're half-right because the crash is tied into politics (namely how governments are responding to the outbreak).

>>18071472
Yep that's how they do it. Plus that's also how they get the direct deposit info.

>>18071490
this, also a reminder that 4chan has always been full of racist fringe views and shock humour, the catch-all 'go back to /pol/' shit needs to stop

>>18071507
Meant to quote >>18071459

>>18071478
Bro, who is coming to collect debt from the USA? The fucking Protoss?

>>18071521
Sell SPY puts

>>18071490
i lurk pol mainly but almost never post
i'm here because i wanted to figure out if it would be wise to put some of the cash i have into basically betting on economic failure. if the economy recovers and does well, i do well. if the economy tanks, i tank. but if i put a bunch of money into SQQQ it seems like i can ensure i am ok either way

probably a lot of people here for pretty much the same reason

Screencapping all the bulls

>>18071529
china

>>18071529
The problem is that we won't be able to raise money to cover our obligations with infinite BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

>White House, Senate reach historic $2 trillion stimulus deal amid growing coronavirus fears
and still futures taking a shit, nice

>>18071386
Hope this edit does the justice you wanted

>>18071529
*blinks in and steals your wallet*

bear and bull are just two sides of a crab coin

Reminder that even with everything else looking red, Dave and Buster has a 9% future increase.

Dotards?

We crabbo today?

>>18071632
>>18071610
the fuck are you faggots doing here? gulag is dying and you post here

New
>>18071645
>>18071645
>>18071645
New

>>18071643
No more crabs. We are in permaVIX bot battles. -6%. They have learned to not trigger the breaker.

>>18071577
this is fantastic anon, thanks a lot. you have captured the essence of the eternal biz bull.

>>18070369
Don't know if you're still here but the price of oil is derived from oil futures. Use the ticker CL to see the price of oil. USO follows the price of CL to a 96% accuracy degree which means it is the best fund to buy if you want direct exposure to the oil price.

>>18071621
granted these guys have been hammered beyond belief though

>>18071897
Different IP but thanks anon. I really should go to sleep now though