/biz/ - Business & Finance

>got home from work last night, went jogging, ate a bit of junk food plus tendies, finished a good non-fiction book, browsed internet, slept only at 3 am
>woke up at 9 am
>drank water, had a shit, browsed internet on phone in bed, tried to get back to sleep but couldn't
>got out of bed at 11.30 am
>browsed internet, drank coffee
>went to gym; SO many gymthots (literally an overload), including this GigaGymThot who was even more depressing to see than the others; if it wasn't for my heavy lifting going really well, I'd have felt decrushalised
>went for my usual walk while listening to CumTown (190) which was funnier than last time
>went to library then walked through park in the dark; walked through a rich area
>saw Staceys everywhere; felt so sad to be an everythingless ugly loser
>now drinking my usual Saturday evening coffee, the highlight of any weekend
>will have a McDonald's binge; the promo burger is now the Grand Big Mac with Bacon
>could go to burger king and have the impossible burger but it's filled with estrogen

I think about my job too much outside of work hours.

I worry that I am a league below successful and capable people in terms of having the integrative views / initiative to do major things. I don't know how to, for example, start a fidget spinner export business. I would have to Google how to do stuff and I'd feel so stupid. I feel like I've never done anything non-trivial in my life. Everything has just been linear combinations of rote work. I'm proud of a few turns of phrase but I've done nothing analytically or logistically challenging. I felt so pathetic when reading a HackerNews topic about cool projects that people were doing and which involved programming AI drones or hard maths.

I am 29 years old and life is over. I wish I was higher up in my job so I could feel smug or something. I'll never be part of the fast track in crowd like people who get jobs at McKinsey and get high up based on networking.