/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>15476374
How did you know? I literally just sat down on the can

>mfw I pretend to shit and just take a 20min break while sitting on the toilet a couple times every day

>>15476374
On Clock Street, actually.

>>15476389
Until some retarded boomer comes in the stall next to you and proceeds to let out grunts and heavy breathing to unleash his monsterously wet and smelly shit

>>15476374
>taking a shit at work
uh disgusting, i never took a shit at my workplace, i simply clamp my ass cheeks and wait for the evening once i can go home.
And even at home i act like you do but at work, i often wait 3/4am to take a silent shit. I'm a lucky guy tho, with the time i learned to retain my shit longer and longer. Also i decided to skip breakfast and take very light meal (no desert, no entree) to generate less shit. Now i take a shit in average once a week. My personal best is 9 days without shitting. Tho i must be careful because they are enormous and super compressed so it's often a 3 step poop action. First i shit but try to not shit it all (1), then i flush. After i finish to take my shit(2), flush again, and finally wipe my ass (3) and do the final flush. If i do 1 & 2 or 2 & 3 at the same time, its the toilet clog guaranteed 100%.
I don't think poop-normies can even encompass the size of 1 weeks' deuce. Usually it's the lenght of my arm.
Also no homo but retaining compressed shit like this transform them in giant pooldo (dildo in poop) and it end up pressing the prostate after the 5th day, and it's legit better than hetero-sex. I never had anything up my ass but i can understand why the faggots would like it. Also i never admitted it to my gfs, i wonder if they would become jealous of my shits so i don't take the risk.

You will maybe think i'm a weirdo but i'm not. Just try to hold back your shit, you not only save water, get pleasure but you also save a shitload of TIME. Let say taking a shit is 5mn loss everytime, and that you shit everyday : 5x7 : 35mn weekly vs 5mn for me.
30mn per week, 2 hours per month, 1 day per year, you save a full month of your life after 30 years! It's enormous!
Please tell me i'm not the only one doing dis frens.

Just had my last pinch

>>15476407
What the fuck am i reading

>>15476407
>Please tell me i'm not the only one doing dis frens.
I dont shit at work and I usually only shit once a week. the whole shoving your shit dildo up your ass is disgusting though

>>15476374
I avoid shitting at work. I've got a thing about public restrooms and can only relax on my own toilet.
However, if you combine all my trips to the urinal, it's prolly close to 2 hours out of the day spent chillin with my cock out.