/biz/ - Business & Finance

You failed my friend. If you get called out, you fire back.

>>13543530
eh, just say you're shy. Then she'll look like an ass.

>>13543530
Beta

>>13543530
There's literally nothing you can do here. If you try to change your behavior, it's a sign that what she said bothered you. if you do nothing, it shows you're an autistic sperg who can't take social cues. If you try a comeback, you'll look pathetic since you have no social clout.

Sorry m8. You fucked up

>>13543530

Tell her the truth... because this is a fucking job, and we're not here to chit chat, we're here to do a job.

>>13543530
go to HR for work place harassment and tell them youre autistic. She'll get fired.

>>13543530
Go to HR

>>13543530

Say "Don't get mad, I have a mild form of autism." Then she looks like a total bitch and you can continue being a socially awkward weirdo.

>>13543562
>>13543571
I’m not going to tattle on her, I get the feeling people already hate me as is. I think I might just quit. Fuck my life life fucking sucks if you’re not socially competent.

>>13543556
Time to go full recluse.

Have you tried not caring about what roasties have to say?

>>13543530
Tell her you see yourself as the Clint Eastwood type

>>13543618
>I’m not going to tattle on her, I get the feeling people already hate me as is.
Then what does it fucking matter? If you are gonna quit, then do something uncharacteristically strong and bring the bitch down with you.

>>13543530
tell her she's just fucking boring

>>13543618
if they already hate you, may as well have them all hate you AND give a normie a lesson in not being a cunt

>>13543618
This isn’t middle school she fucked up and deserves to get fired. You need to tell HR and trust me when she gets fired or reprimanded nobody will ever fuck with you again. They’re never going to be your friends so fuck them anyway.

>>13543530
This is exactly what I do, am I autistic?

>>13543644
Checked and 100% correct answer

>>13543599
nonironically this, only suitable answer. Theres also high chance she was just joshing or flirting with you, but as autist, you ain't gonna be able differentiate anyway. If she wasn't being a cunt, she'll maybe find the answer cute, and if she was being a cunt - congrats, you just publicly fucked her one (metaphorically speaking) legendarily

tell her not to come in to work tomorrow in minecraft

>>13543530

"Why are you spending your work time examining my behavior. I'll let you know I am a non binary self identifying accomplice who shares no interest in engaging the initiation of 'small conversation' with my fellow coworking human employees. Your exclamation about me has made me felt violated internally and I am suffering mental damage that is costing the firm punitive damages for lost time. This exchange has been documented and will be filed accordingly to HR as an 'urgent priority'. Additionally, I will be contacting my lawyer to see that this harassment case has been seen through its appropriate judicial review."

>>13543692
It’s not flirting, she sounded vicious and upset with me for not being normal. I can’t think that quickly on my feet and am ashamed of not being normal so I’d never think to admit to being autistic.

>>13543647
>>13543644
>>13543635
I just don’t have it in me, everyone else there likes her. I don’t fit in anyway, may as well just leave and let them continue on.

>>13543530
Just look her in the eyes and thank her for asking the first genuine question worth responding to in your shithole of an office. You should then proceed to explain that you often think of killing yourself because you have to subject yourself to repetitive and pointless social interaction to maintain a lifestyle you aren't even conscious enough to enjoy anymore. Maybe talk to her about your gun collection at length after that.

>>13543721
you need to get your testosterone checked.

>>13543719
w-woah
this

>>13543731
Maybe, I’m low body fat and fairly fit. I have low self esteem from a life of getting randomly insulted like this so many times. Happened from school teachers and classmates, now it happens in work.

>>13543618
>I get the feeling people already hate me as is

You have social anxiety. Nobody cares about you enough to hate you. I guarantee it, unless you make their life harder by messing up at work constantly.

>>13543767
Maybe don't try to be something you're not. Being aloof is fine.

>>13543800
being anti-social and shy is one thing, letting people walk over you is another and there's no valid excuse for it.

>>13543618
Say you were beaten severely as a child for talkin by an violent relative and it just has made you a quiet person. Then say, Sorry the results of the severe abuse I took as a child is causing you problems. I will work to make things easier for you.

Watch her just dissolve.

>>13543767
> randomly insulted from school teachers
see, now youre either:
(a) exaggerating
(b) making it up for sympathy (not a good idea here btw)
(c) paranoid
As someones prob. already tried to point out, others are most definitely less pre-occupied with their opinion of you than you are with your opinion of what they think of you. tldr, dont bother drama-queening your resignation or going postal on her, no-one will know what its about.

>>13543767
Women are carnivorous creatures who will quickly weed out who is at the top of the social ranking and who is at the bottom

Men don't care, because you can still be competent, but for women, you are an outlier that disturbs social cohesion; you are an anomaly that needs to be pecked and scrutinized.

You need to use this opportunity to stand up for yourself or make her look like a bitch. Don't wallow in your autism and quit, that's what they want

Burn it all

>>13543854
Some of them were just harmless jabs at me for being shy, sometimes it was coaches in sports who would bond with the other players on the team by shutting on me, calling me a dumbass and then looking over at the other kids to see if they were laughing, calling me in after practice to call me dogshit etc. Teachers used to make a big charade if I said something out loud during the class.

>>13543874
I guess, most of my male peers are accepting of me, I’ve had coaches busy my balls sometimes but I always think they genuinely wanted to help me (some were just vicious and assholes though). There are just women who can’t stand men who are shy/quiet/low self esteem, nobody has ever been meaner than women.

>>13543530
bruh you failed from the start for trying to fit in. from now on just be like fuck it and ignore everyone. you are the weak one in the pack, they have singled you out and will devour you if you continue to show weakness. from now on be strong and independent. they will still give you strange looks and probably joke behind your back, but it will eat them up inside when they are forced to be around you every day and you refuse to acknowledge their presence.

>>13543530
Tell her she'll regret her words during the beta uprising.

>>13543530
Order phenibut if you want to keep the job.

>>13543542
This. Double down. You don't want to make her cry (much), you just want to pull the breaks off as a sign to others that you are not to be fucked with. If you've worked with her for any amount of time, you should know at least some things that she's insecure about. Her weight, lack of a romantic partner, the fact that she's such a bitch. Deliver it deadpan and don't shy away. Harpies like this feed on the insecurity of others, they're a vaginal crease in space-time sucking in the psychological vigor of men they feel they can destroy.

Gauge the organization too. The fact that she's getting away with saying stuff like this says to me you're either working in a place run by a man who doesn't know how to manage an office properly, or else is run by a woman / beta male who will go along with a woman acting like a bitch and take her side when you shove it back at her.

>>13543548
Don't do this, it won't work like he's thinking it will. If this is a genuine issue, complain about her. The people laughing likely don't like her either.

>>13543599
This could also work, but don't downplay it. Literally just claim to have autism. If she harasses you again, HR will fire her without thinking (though on the off-chance that they're competent enough to demand documentation, you would probably have to quit).

>>13543618
Also if you're going to quit, consider telling HR it was because of her harassing you. You're quitting anyways so you might as well get her fired.

>>13543721
Just say you don't really like talking.

>>13544118
The autism play could heavily work in anon's favor if the women baby him

>>13543530

I would have laughed my ass off like who is too unaware to call an autist anyway, probably would do some george constanza face

>>13543721
>she sounded vicious and upset with me for not being normal.
What is up with normies and especially women that hate on introverts?

>>13543530
Who cares, just shrug it off and say "ok you caught me im autistic" and laugh at her. Then proceed to ghost her for the rest of your term there.

The less you care the better things usually turn out for you. The less you try to fit in as long as you do your own shit and actually self improve, work out, etc etc. People will flock to you without trying to do anything. It's literally that easy let me give an example. I like to collect cool rocks and shit, it gives me an excuse to go outside, I actually get something out of it with a story to tell. I like to bring the rocks I find into work, people ask me about them and I tell them what I did. That's it, that simple. If people are off having their own conversation I give literally 0 fucks, in fact I don't want people talking to me but they still do. You should WANT people to FUCKING LEAVE YOU ALONE so you can actually get things done.

>>13544232
Tribalism. They can't think outside the pack, and their position in the pack is the backbone of their mental framework. An introvert, on the other hand, usually has a broad worldview and couldn't give a shit about social status. Unfortunately for the introvert, this increased capacity for understanding comes at the expense of being able to be one with the pack. The tribal minded normie perceives this not necessarily as an existential threat, but an issue that needs to be confronted to protect the tribe, or more accurately their standing within the tribe.

It's the same reason introverts don't go out to clubs, the extroverted nature of it is offputting. Introverted behavior is offputting to normies the same way, but they lack the consciousness to understand it's not a threat to them on a primal level.

Tell her you got autism from being vaccinated so she thinks twice about getting her kids vaccinated. Maybe her kid gets whooping cough, play the long game op.

>>13543530
The reports of my awkwardness have been greatly exaggerated

>>13543530

You’re supposed to bend her slut ass over and start aggressively fingerblasting away while screaming, “I IMAGINE THE SMELL NO LONGER!!!”

>>13544296
Interesting...would you say modern society actually favors introversion? I notice in public more and more people don't really give a shit about socializing due to smartphones.

>>13543618
Imagine not going full sperg in fucking someone up when they fuck with you

you should rufie her at work

>>13543571
LMAO

>>13544307
kek

Go to her when you guys can have a private conversation. Tell her you've never been good in social situations. Then ask her if maybe she can give you some pointers.. then bang her.. then tell HR

>>13544324
It favors Type A personalities to a large extent. Not necessarily extroverted, but irrationally competitive and emotionally driven.

>>13543530
i hate cunts like that. When that happens to me i have to restrain myself, I really feel like punching them in the face. Why are normies so willfully stupid? They act like every socially awkward introvert they meet is the first one who has ever existed in the history of humanity, and it's their job to put them on the spot and shame them. What I do is reject people before they get a chance to reject me. Don't sit around like a beta hanger-on awkardly inserting yourself into conversations, instead ignore everyone except the individuals you genuinely like and study everyone's insecurities so you can strike if necessary.

But probably don't be mean to her or else she'll brand you a "creep" or, what's popular these days: a "narcissist". These days socially awkard people who have trouble connecting get labelled "cover narcissists".

>>13544444
WASTED

who cares OP

she doesnt matter at all
never forget that

just b urself :)
enjoy life as best as you can

>>13543530
This is one of the major reasons I'm conflicted about being friendly with coworkers since they might just pull stunts like this. I don't talk much anymore and have shied away from several coworkers. Only 2 remain that I go out of my way to talk with, both of them girls.

Girl 1
> Easy to talk to
> Conversation just flows
> Sometimes jabs at me, 1 on 1 or 1 on 2 (generally the other person is someone I'm friendly with)
> Never reported me to HR for stuff I've said that'd likely cause an sjw to report me
> Probably just how she acts

Girl 2
> Somewhat similar to me in personality including awkward
> Hard time making conversation flow
> She mostly only seems engaged when we're goofing off and/or girl 1 is in the conversation
> Gives off obvious body language when she's trying to exit conversation
> Never seemed verbally rude towards me, is actually encouraging

However I'm unsure if she likes my presence
> Eating lunch outside breakroom
> Girl 2 appears and sits at table to the right
> After a minute she makes a comment
> A while later makes another comment
> We start talking
> 2 minutes into the conversation and she's packing up to leave
> Her lunch wasn't over...

> Earlier today girl 2 came to my cubicle cause she was bored
> 2 minutes max and she was inching her way out...

>>13543530
It would be hilarious if you pretended to shoot up your workplace tomorrow. Obviously as a joke haha.

>>13543530
A simple and chilled "fuck you" goes a long way.

>>13544509
girl 2 just seems socially retarded

>>13544509
girl number 2 likes you.. just waiting for you to make a move.

>>13544509
Sounds like you've got two women in the workplace who more or less jive with you.

what's wrong with just telling her you have nothing to say?

>>13544190
What does it mean if a few older female coworkers baby you if you are ugly?

>>13544479

that's right

>>13543530
If youre fat no one will ever acknowledge your existence

>>13543530
Every time I speak up everyone else around me stays quiet and turns around to me and listens.

Whats up with that?

>>13544707
It means everyone respects your opinion and wants your perspective. Either that or the rarity of your speaking increases the value of your words. This is one of the 48 laws of power

>>13544707
Is this at work, out and about or any specific place?

Could be a multitude of reasons.

>>13544556
Thanks for the feedback my brother said something similiar.

>>13544509
What makes you say that?

>>13544598
Not sure what you mean by "jive"

Do you mean "get along with"?

>>13544556
Thanks for the feedback my brother said something similiar.

>>13544587
What makes you say that? She usually leaves quickly and our conversations don't last long.

>>13544598
Not sure what you mean by "jive"

Do you mean "get along with"?

>>13544755
By "jive", I mean "gets along with". Seems like girl #2 likes to dip in and out.

Girl #1 sounds a bit playful as a good number of friendships are.

A female colleague said to me 'you haven't spoken once today'

Some faggot said to me 'what do you do at home? Just lay down in a coffin?'

A supervisor said to me 'youre so quiet'

>>13543530
Happens to me all the time anon. Don’t be bothered by it. Just be real and tell her you know you’re just really introverted. I have made a lot of friends with people by just saying this.

>>13543530
>yup

*proceed to doing work*

>>13544768
Ahh okay, exactly what I thought you meant. Yeah, girl 1 is playful. Girl 2 sure has one quick dip in and out. At least she intiates conversation unlike the majority of coworkers.

>>13543530
When in doubt, just agree and amplify.

Google "heartiste agree amplify" for discussion and examples.

Just agree with what she said, and then take it to a random, extreme.

"You're right, I don't start conversations with anyone because I can't possibly keep up with you guys. Like that conversation you had the other day about game of thrones. Amazing"

"You're right, I give short responses because I don't want to overwhelm you with my brilliance"

"you're totally right, you are so observant. Amazing.

>>13544241
What kind of rocks? Post pic. Rocks in my area all are the same.

>>13544863
I think he means special rocks. Iirc I knew a guy back in elmentary school who brought a rock with crystals inside. It was pretty cool.

Also I'd like to see pics too

>>13544844
Cringe

Find male friend

>>13543530
"Sorry, ill try not to talk to you."
Ez

>>13544844

And they call us the autistic ones.

>>13544509

Are you 15? you sound like 15

>>13543618
she deserves to be fired for being a cunt. Let HR know about her, you little cuck

>>13544844
>"You're right, I give short responses because I don't want to overwhelm you with my brilliance"
oof

>>13544765
You said she’s like you. Flip the situation as though you’re her.
>you’re sitting next to your crush
>make a few funny comments
>get outta there before conversation goes stale, or there’s any awkward silence
Your mission is to get the fuck anon, and I’m going to explain how. First, let her know the conversation is going well. You may thinks it’s obvious, but she needs the affirmation. Second, do something extremely awkward and uncomfortable, then make a peer move. Example: Fart loudly enough you’re sure she hears it. When she looks at you surprised, embarrassed, disgusted, as she probably will, loudly and confidently say “watch me shit my pants next!” At this point, you’ll need to actually shit your pants to show you’re not bluffing. If you can’t, take off your pants and tie them by the legs around your head and run out of the room. You’ll have opened the door to the perfect relationship, have gotten on the floor of fuck town, and then you can walk the dinosaur.

>>13543530

Say you "have crippling social anxiety and thank her for singling you out and that it's pretty obvious to the other people in the office who have discussed it with you, encouraged you and tried to make your job more comfortable." Then she'll feel like a dick and think other co workers don't gossip with her because they don't like her and are judging her behind her back which is what all women fear. In fact if you say this in front of a bunch of the women and they will all feel that way and no one will trust each other because most people are guilty of being shitty co workers. Then they will be nicer to you because they will think you're not an outsider and worry they are the outsiders.

>>13545009
This is honestly cringetown USA

>female
>coworker
>thread

>>13543618
Nah fuck that bitch she wouldn’t think twice if it was reversed

>>13543530

Awww.

What a jerk she is man.

Forget her man you're totally not hurting anyone.

She's just a hater.
Send me nudes tho?

>>13543530
When you get older, you don't give a shit.

If her opinion was worth something, would she be working there looking for people to pick on?

She's a nobody.

Babbies first shit test

>>13543643
This.

>>13544897
>>13544954
>And they call us the autistic ones.

You guys are great. We've all got a lot to learn from both of you.

>>13545035
>This is honestly cringetown USA
You are amazing. Love this.

>>13543530

Stay safe OP....

>>13544863
Quite literally any rocks. I'll pick up a random rock with no special atributes if I go to a certain location or at the end of a hike because they hold sentimental value, although I almost always find something out of the ordinary.

I have hundreds of different types of rocks and it's almost midnight so I won't be posting any pics, but near my area are "sunstones" pic related taken from online. They are pretty rare, only found in certain locations and I have to drive 10 hours into the desert to find them.

They can be cut and set into jewlery, lots of varied colors and they look fairly unique. People also think they're cool as shit, gave some out to co-workers and one of them gave them to his kid to use in a science project. Feels good to give to people once in a while and improve your surroundings.

>>13545418
Pic of cut stonestone (pink schiller effect).

>>13544825
It's generally a good sign when the other party initiates a conversation with positive interactions.

>>13545165
>If her opinion was worth something, would she be working there looking for people to pick on?

Her opinion is bullshit and not worth anything but the problem is if OP is going to work there then, like it or not, it matters how his co-workers perceive him. If they see her shitting on him and he sits and sputters, that is not great. Also, if she is saying something about him and it rings true (i.e it's true that he never starts conversations) then his coworkers will think less of him.

So it's good to try to defuse the situation with humor but also without escalating it and getting into some moronic war of insults.

If OP can pull it off, then yes, monotone and saying "wow thanks for your input Marsha" is fine. But if he can't quite pull that off, then some kind of goofy joke will deflect off him.

It doesn't fucking matter whether it's funny or not. It matters that he just says something that changes the tenor of the conversation and makes clear that he doesn't take her seriously.

>>13543721
Why do you insist on being good to people that will never do the same for you?

>>13543719
This, except claim to be a disgusting tranny (you should say non-binary transgender), and you feel uncomfortable making small talk because of their internalised micro-aggressions against you and your gender identity

>>13545467
>roastie is a bitch
>be funny about it so no-one feels bad except you
Fucking normies

>>13545528
>>roastie is a bitch
agreed
>>be funny about it so no-one feels bad except you
no. It does the opposite. It conveys to the coworkers that what she says is not important and does not deserve a serious response. It is the most effective way to belittle her.

>>13545418
You remind me of a friend of mine who moved with her bf to Arizona and they started making money through polishing stones/gems and creating jewelery.

Why are women always so insufferable in everything they do.

Why do they ALWAYS cause trouble.

>>13543530
Punch her directly on the nose.

Or if you want to participate in the honk world full force: file a harrassment claim against her.

>>13543619
You never go full recluse

>>13543599
this to get coworkers and HR on your side
>>13543561
and this to get the boss on your side.
>>13543618
then you're a faggot and dont actually want our help. you don't care about yourself so why should we

>>13544190
That is my fetish.

>>13544707
In school we used to go to the blackboard and read the poems we learned by hearth. Usually the class misbehaved, was noisy and everyone was chatting, but when i was called to read it was dead silent, same happened in pretty much every situation...

>>13543530
Nice try post-modernist neomarxist

Ghost everyone except your supervisor. Literally silent treatment everyone. If they say shit don't even look at them or if you do don't break eye contact and slowly smile before carrying on. Always stay busy and minimize your time there. Trust me, that bitch is way more miserable than you and this preschool shit is not worth your time. Get out of the sandbox.

>>13543530
>Yep, I'm autistic, what now Sherlock? Are you going to discriminate me because of my disability? You nasty ableist person, I'm going straight to HR.

>>13545028

Normies are so fucking pathetic. It makes me literally sick reading your post and realising it is 100% true.

>>13543530

Just start a conversation with her every day. Either you learn to communicate better and make a friend in the process, or you leverage your autism and annoy her until she realizes she bit off more than she could chew. Win win. Your autism is basically a superpower.

>>13543530
Holy shit bro thats rude of her.
Nah your all good, just look at her and be like

"I'm sorry if I came off a bit weird, I'm obviously not the best at talking to people, but I'm trying to learn, if you don't like it I'm happy to chill by myself"

Apologising to her may seem counterproductive, but at the end of the day you want the best for you, shes gonna pull and then shes the dick at that point, you won't have to leave because the group has already accepted you.

But this does require some standing up for yourself and being ready to chill and have a good time if they don't respond well.

>>13543634
Only correct answer

>>13543530
Please kindly delete this

>>13543530
holy shit that hurt reading
>coworker
you kinda deserved it tho, embrace this new era where women work and men get gibs

>>13543530
You go up to her and show her this beautiful thread you started and then tell her to fuck off. Or maybe dont do that

>>13544107
yeah getting labeled as a snitch in his workplace will really help

>>13543530
I would just ask her how do you know my laughs are fake? Since she won't be able to give a good answer I would then proceed that she is making things up. The final step would be to give an example, like it's not cool to talk people publically down. We're not in highschool anymore (this shows everyone that you think that she's acting like a child).

Then tell her you will plan a meeting with management about this situation (give an example that fucking with you gives drama).

They still hate your gutt but will fuck off.

Since the situation happend I would make an appointment with HR and talk openly about this situation.

>>13543530
"you ever notice how people who talk a lot say a lot of stupid stuff?"
"honestly, you are boring. i didn't want to bring this up, but if you have to ask..."

one of these, or both

>>13543530
OP I'm going to to be the only person in this whole thread to give you some solid information and advice. Here goes:

She's shit-testing you and you failed. This is not a problem, because you can always recover.

But what does shit-testing mean? It means she's interested in you. And she's testing your "worthiness", to phrase it in a fairly correct manner.

She noticed things about you. She would not have noticed and mentioned these things about you if she had not mentally reserved some space in her head for you. Trust me on this one. I know it may sound counter-intuitive to some people at first, but this shit is gold.

So, put aside all other things and look at how you correct this situation. Well, it's easy. You forget it happened, you make a mental note, and you feel a little ego boost. Maybe next time if she says something that's a shit test, you reply: "I'm kind of flattered that you notice so many details about my behavior. I don't know if I myself am as interested in you as you are in me, however."

This is beginner advice, because I can tell that you're a beginner. The end-game is that you either bang this woman or you develop a flirty relationship with her, but you choose not to shit where you eat (bang where you work).

Good luck and use this information, because it is correct. Trust me, I've been down the road and I learned and, essentially, got good at it.

Cheers.

>>13543530

I got a special normie faggot who constantly talks about everyone.
He also said to my face that I should not be so awkward sometimes.
Wtf ? I said you don't know me and do you have any problems with me ? "But in an aggressive tone "
I should have said we are only here to work ,and they didn't pay me for social skills but my hand craftship(blue collar work)
Also I'm not so fucked like you holy jesus , thanks for posting this I'm gonna take some notes ready against faggots like your female coworker. I hate when fucking work NPCS are using their time to actually analyze your style and make a conclusion about you in time where they only see you working and for 8 hours maximum like wtf man mind your own business and don't judge other.
Also I hate working with mid 30 coworker they are literally taking everything serious and if u act awkward for 1 sec they judge you by it ,holy shit those generation is the worst imo fucking boomers. I'd kill them all if I could

Also I'm not gonna stay forever here in the company,doing university part times for 4 years after I get my bachelor I'll leave like a nigger after chicken tendies.

Here's some tips from me:

>>13543562
dont do this, anyone who tattled to HR is the one that gets fired. every time

>>13543530
Complain to your boss/HR and say you have aspergers and you try to get along as best you can but you experience workplace bullying, companies are terrified of discrimination lawsuits so 9 out of 10 times she will be forced to apologise to you and your other colleagues will be frightened to upset you in the future

t. autistic sociopath

>>13543530
this hits me right in the feels
god i want to die

Learn to march forward Anon. These kinda roaches leech on you no mather were you go. They feed on putting others down. Burn her down sarcastically in public with examples like previous anon posts. If that doesnt help go full psycho ; take her 1 on 1 and confront her. Nothing violent, just getting a little bit too much in her space, deep eye contact and say ´ hey, do you like me to feel uncomfortable? Because thats what you're doing with this attitude. Thats not very nice is it? Accomponied by the fakest psycho smile ever. Eyes wide open.

Even if you do quit the job. Use this place as a learning experiment for the next situation.


You should have learned this lesson a little earlier.

>giggle

LMAO it's not that bad what they say when your not around is more important

>>13543530
Happened to me at college, except it was Chad who said that. Everyone laughed and I just stood there silently. Fuck my life.

>>13543530

The correct response is:

"Why does it matter?"

>>13543530
>larp
no one says stuff like that in public

>>13543530
You embrace it. Say something like ''wow, an introverted person acting strangely in a social setting, how weird.''

>>13543599
Either that or just claim that you've had a lot of things in your personal life which have been highly stressful and are doing your best to stay somewhat social. Everyone has/will be there at some point so she'll get wrecked and you don't leave a paper trail for HR to track down.

>>13543530
Pathetic

>>13543530
You're exactly like my coworker anon.
In retrospect, your best bet is just to project weakness like say "I'm just grateful to be here" "I'm just trying to appreciate" stuff like that. Good normie will tolerate you and obnoxious normie won't see you as a threat to their career. It's all about office politics anon just relax

>>13544844
I think this anon had the best advice here, the 'agree and amplify' stuff works wonders if you are witty/lucky enough to come up with something fast enough.

"yeah you're right, I've not started a conversation once in the last 10 years, my religion forbids it"

or go the passive aggressive route: "of course I have to fake laugh, do you even hear the stuff you come away with?"

or aggressive aggressive: "who would want to start a conversation with you??"

These probably won't work in this situation as I'm guessing OP is the same way with everyone else in his workplace, so you'd basically be insulting them all, It's difficult to really come up with anything without knowing all the dynamics in his workplace

The one big problem with responses like this is, if you pull of something good, she will be the one posting thread on her 4chan equivalent site or asking her friends, to try and get revenge or regain the social credit she might have lost in the exchange. I think that these people who try to publicly degrade your character have that 'social climbing' need in them, next thing you know the fat bitch Linda in work is constantly firing barbed comments at you, complaining about everything you do, etc. Then you've got a long term problem to deal with in a workplace which I'm guessing is already daunting enough as is. It's a fucking pain in the ass

slash her tires

>>13544307
top kek.

>Work in casual small white collar setting but no dress code
>Wear flip flops
>Accounting girl says "anon can you wash your feet, they stink"
>New hiree black girl laughs her ass off

>A female coworker called me out today
you KNOW what must be done, anon-kun

>>13547921
imagine going to work in flip flops.

>>13547921
>exposing your feet to the public
what are you doing bro, feet are disgusting to most people, just look at your feet right now, like really look at it
Considering you just said you work with mainly women thats a big nono, men don't really care but women do

>>13543530

yo yo listen up kid your a man now you gotta do one thing ,

Follow her to where she lives , break in , hit her with a baseball bat and tell her "who is fake laughing now huh you want to start a conversation now you fuking CUNT huh is that what u want HUH? and then laugh and go while giving her 3rd grade disability with your baseball bat.

Problem solved. you got something to talk about that she got robbed and she will never come to your job office anymore .

>>13544844
HAHAHAHHA AMAZING
This is the best troll in the thread

>>13543647
>She deserves to get fired for hurting someone's feelings
You will never make it you weak skinned faggot.

>I’m not going to tattle on her, I get the feeling people already hate me as is. I think I might just quit. Fuck my life life fucking sucks if you’re not socially competent.

What the fuck kind of work place is this? People at my work place will hate you if you are slow and your output is shitty.

>>13543530
Should have said, "I have autism. I'm a little on the higher-functioning end, but it still affects and inhibits my interactions with others."

>>13543618
>>13546551
Oh, just slash her tires then. Dump coffee in her purse or put chewed gum in it. Follow her home one night and then quit your job, then months later do something so that no one will suspect it was you.

>>13546537
>Here's some tips from me:
>1 post by this ID
based

>>13546363
>She's shit-testing you and you failed.
What the fuck is this autistic shit? How do people even find time for these retarded little mind games every single day?
So you're telling me that people are going to put you on the spot, and you're just expected to jump through hoops to appease them?
Being a wage slave sounds fucking terrible. Can't believe people willingly put up with these psychotic mind games. The human condition is absolutely degenerated.

>>13543635
This. You have to kill her OP. No other options.

>>13548599
>Letting a fucking woman dominate you
Never going to make it

>>13548580
>HAHAHAHHA AMAZING
that's so cool the way you typed it so that each letter was capitalized. It really emphasized what you said and made a great point even better. How did you figure out how to do that?

>>13549136
There is a key on your keyboard cakes Caps Lock, when you press it essentially what happens is it “locks” your input into sending capital letters only, until you turn it off. It’s a really easy way to type capital letters in rapid succession without needing to hold down the Shift key, and is also helpful because it frees up your pinky finger for typing

>>13543530
Is she hot op? She might be into you

>>13549136
>>13549155
WOW THANKS GUYS111 THIS IS LIKE A CHEAT CODE FOR TALKING ONLINE WHEN YOU WANT TO GET YOUR POINT ACROSS

IT DOESN'T WORK FOR EXCLAMATION POINTS THOUGH1

>>13549168
Caps Lock is cruise control for cool

>>13543530
"Did you ever notice how much of a bitch you are?"

Problem solved. Now all you can do is plot and wait for your moment for revenge.

>>13543562
do it

>>13543530
Quit masturbation to increase testosterone and happiness.

NEVER PLAY THE VICTIM ROLE
Especially don't take shit from women like that, people like that feed on your insecurity, would you simply let them?

Find out the signs of being a beta, learn about ways to make yourself feel more confident. Self-consciousness is very important. Now go and make me proud autismo.

>>13551010
>first time reading about alpha males and how they behave
>had literally fit the opposite of that description to a T
And thus my journey started

>>13551086
There are some great tips in this thread, the most important things to work on are:

Yourself:

Live healthy ( have a good diet, no masturbation to mess you up, this makes me feel like a empty husk for about 6 days or so. Sleep well, don't sit in front of a screen for hours. )
Self-love ( i accept myself and am happy with it.)
Self-improvement ( i accept myself but acknowledge my negatives, i will step out of my comfort zone to face them)
Vision of others ( do others "see" / like me? What can i do to be seen and liked?
If my vision on certain subjects conflict then that's allright, i shouldn't please everyone that's a bad habit.)

If your vision of yourself is more clear and likeable then continue.

Others:

Greet others with a legit smile, a fake one or nervous one doesn't work. You want to see other people smile too don't you?
If you make other people more comfortable with you, they'll joke around more and are more happy to you in general.
Notice positive details on other people, they will appreciate that and find you sharp at that moment. In other words surprise them with who you are.
Learn to differentiate negative comments from positive ones. And act accordingly.

Come into work looking angry and talk to no one for a week. If someone says something to you give them the shortest most terse answer you can muster.
They'll think you're going to shoot the place up and will treat you nicely from now on. Worked at my last 3 jobs.

>>13543530
"True. *fake laugh*"

dumb autist

>>13543530
You should have said who gives a fuck how I act, that's literally none or your business.

"Why? Because of people like you, saying things like you just did."

She took a risk by exposing her cuntishness directly, call her out on it concisely and politely so she looks bad and you don't.

>>13543530

Just bertstare them down and call HR afterward because she is creating a hostile work environment

>>13543530
If this actually happened and you're not just farming (you)s you should have just said you're just here to pay your rent, that's what I say all the time

>>13544094
>space-time

Get a load of this schizo 21 year old trying to string words together. Cmon bro get a job

>>13543530
>Obviously I’m an autistic weirdo and she was really upset by it.

Then just tell her that. "I'm a weirdo who's horrible at socializing", shrug with a smug grin and walk away. Problem solved and you even spark her curiosity.

>>13546363
look at that retard. that's what game does to losers who then only see interactions through the stupid game filters. Dont listen to that moron OP.
>>13546656
>>13543530
I'll give you the only right answer. Write an email to her and all the people who were giggling explaining that you suffer from autism and that you are sorry you come out weird and it's not your intention. Tell them that you were hurt by that comment. Write a little bit about what autism is and how it makes you terrible with social interactions but you're still trying your best to socialize.
I guarantee they will all feel bad. Of course because they aren't aware you're an autist so they just think you're a weirdo. Once they understand that it's not your fault their behaviour will change they will feel like they were assholes to you.
I know it takes some courage to put yourself in a vulnerable state but it's worth it. If they are not total cunts they will apologize and stop being cunts to you.

I love wagies.

>>13552770
>Write an email to her and all the people who were giggling explaining that you suffer from autism and that you are sorry you come out weird and it's not your intention. Tell them that you were hurt by that comment. Write a little bit about what autism is and how it makes you terrible with social interactions but you're still trying your best to socialize.

Honestly hard to tell whether you are being serious or whether you are trying to bait OP, who, assuming no larp, seems to be honestly struggling.

Serious question: have you ever actually put this advice into practice and/or have you ever seen it actually work.

On a few occasions I have seen a coworker, write an email like this "hey you guys, I felt like you were ganging up on me" and everyone then (1) apologized for the sake of appearances and then (2) did everything in their power to avoid that coworker because they -- correctly -- realized that any further interaction with that coworker was risky.

That might sound great but it's actually not. On plenty of occasions former coworkers have gotten me jobs or otherwise helped me out. On plenty of occasions promotions, bonuses, etc. have come from getting along well with my coworkers.

>>13543530
just go see her another day, say you're shy but you enjoy their conversations and she's probably right, and you need to work on your social skills, ask her if you could spend more time with her so she teaches you, this vulnerability shit does work, just don't fake being a chad and try to fit in because normies can smell that shit.
if you play this right you can fuck her in the ass in 1 week

>>13543556
"have you ever noticed that i dont give a shit"

"maybe i do that just with you"

there are 100's of things op could have said and he would have came out alpha chad as fuaaaaaaaaaaark

Lol do you work with a bunch of niggers or something? I can't imagine any coworker of mine having no filter like that unless they're some dumb black bitch

>>13551615
This. Helps if you actually own an AR-15 and post pics of yourself posing with it on Instagram

>>13548692
That's called women in the workplace. I also don't think that's a 'shit test' and anyone that thinks insults are shit tests are autistic themselves and fail to read social queues. But bitchiness and cattiness and weird drama are exactly why historically men and women had different jobs but modern people don't really get why their workplaces are such uncomfortable environments when infact it's the fact that there's too many sexes in one room

Some of these answers are too elaborate, you should've just been honest. "I'm trying my best to fit in but I don't care about your life or anything we talk about." Totally slam the breaks. You can't do this now obviously, but if this happens again you have to stiff arm the conversation.

>>13543530
Why was she so annoyed by you? Disgusting whore, why can't people mind their fucking business?

>>13543721
that's a basedboy response, man the fuck up bro

>>13543530
>NPC shaming you in front of other robots because you are a human
the absolute state of this jewish clown world
you shouldve headbutted that hoe

>>13553189
yeah it helps until the retards in your state pass a "red tape" law allowing the police to steal all your guns if someone else thinks you might not be okay

>>13552994
yes it worked but it wasn't done by email. Face to face with the girl would be better

>>13552994
>On plenty of occasions promotions, bonuses, etc. have come from getting along well with my coworkers
OP is an autist and dont know how to interact with people. So much that it annoys his coworkers so at least he should let them know he's autistic and that's why they think he's weird.

>>13543721
>It’s not flirting, she sounded vicious and upset with me for not being normal.
She's interested in you enough to think about you. If you had responded to the challenge by teleporting behind her and dominating her intellectually she would have become more interested. In that situation even being brutally honest and vulnerable while maintaining a pleasant composure demonstrates a form of strength.

>>13543556
>>13543530

False you rape her, film it, and exert your dominance as a man

>>13554276
>yes it worked but it wasn't done by email. Face to face with the girl would be better
fair enough and appreciate this answer. thank you.

>>13554313
>>On plenty of occasions promotions, bonuses, etc. have come from getting along well with my coworkers
>OP is an autist and dont know how to interact with people. So much that it annoys his coworkers so at least he should let them know he's autistic and that's why they think he's weird.

You may be right about this. Whenever I see these discussions on here, I never know what to make of anons self-diagnosing themselves with autism or aspergers or whatever. Not accusing them of larping. Just can't tell whether (a) they are socially awkward but can learn to get better or (b) they truly are, like, disabled and so it's like demanding that a color-blind person just teach themselves to tell the difference between the red and the green folders so their boss will stop yelling at them.

From your earlier comment you seem to think it's retarded to apply game principles, but in my case -- nerdy but not autistic -- I started applying the principles, e.g. "agree and amplify" in a macho/jock/ex-military workplace and found that I got a lot less shit from my co-workers. So, fwiw I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss using those techniques. But to each their own. Appreciate your responses (except for the part about your calling me a retard but oh well)

>>13543530
Get a manual labor job and stay out of offices if you're that socially retarded. Simple solution.

>>13543530
>>13543599
>>13543721
The key is to not care...unless you do care, at which point it's your fault for caring. and if you care then why are you on here complaining about it? you should already know what to do, which is to learn how to socialize.

The only reason you came here is for a hugbox of internet bros to tell you it'll be alright instead of not being a bitch and doing what you're supposed to do which is to learn to socialize.

Im not a much of a social person but i am that way because i want to be. People don't mess with me like they do with you because they can tell im not insecure and i would do something about it. I DONT CARE. But you apparently do so its your fault.

dont be born a faggot next time.

>>13549204
An oldie and a goodie meme right there.

>>13543530
start lifting and stop fapping

>>13543530
OP just reply with something like this;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvzlyfRF6E4

>your mother would not be proud of what you have just said. Being rude is not the same as having fun. It is laughing at the expense of another person. you should be ashamed of yourself.

>>13543635
Socializing is just a game. Understand that and play it like a game. Fail forward. It's okay to fail. in fact.. its basically required before succeeding.

>>13544509
God damn. Let me assist young sirs...

1. Don't date co-workers.
2. Treat everyone else the exact same level of likeability.
3. Offer friendship to anyone and everyone, even the worst.
4. Have infinite patience. Never alter your personality for anyone's sake but your own.

5. Any moves on coworkers, pre-consider your job is lost anyway and start looking for another (which will be a sign of attractiveness anyway.

6. Chicks in the workplace can be psycho. Befriend them. But do not get too involved. Look for other work, the situation will not change for you.

>>13556264
That sounds gay. And you probably are a faggot.

>>13556151
I can see the response now....
>my mother is dead
Then OP feels like a gigantic pos

>>13556333
raced and breadpilled

>>13543530
go in guns blazing, kill as many people as possible but leave her alive and for maximum effect
play the baby shark mommy shark song loud as youre gunning people down.
pro: she will be forever hunted plus every time she hears that song she will go into a panic and have years of theraphy

cons: youll goto ass rape prison unless you blow your brains out after doing the dead

good luck frwen!

>>13543530
What is your job and does she sign your paychecks?

>>13543530
>Your tits are small and I bet you fuck niggers, whore.

>>13543530
You fucked up in not having a deadpan line to come back at her in the first place as anons have pointed out.

However, you can still take her advice. Try to initiate conversations with your co-workers. Take a shot before work if you have to (but don't get caught). Show your coworkers you are working on your social inadequacies and they will respect you regardless of this vapid cunt Stacy putting you on blast this time. Guarantee they will forget about it within a week.

However, don't talk to her. Completely ghost her. If you have to say anything to her, email her, even if she's literally 5 feet away from you in the same room. She will go crazy.

That's what I would do.

>>13556698
This. I took a shot of tequila before work one time because I had a sore throat and I was way more personable and productive. I almost got caught by one of my managers that said my eyes were funny. I said i was tired but I doubt he bought it.

I wish we were able to drink on the job like we did back when America was a powerhouse.

>>13543530
>"Hahaha.....what?!"

done