/biz/ - Business & Finance

you live in jail?

>>13444310
What job do u have I need one, anything

>>13444310
jail would be nice if you're a faggot.
do you bang a lot of hot dudes?

>>13444320
yeah, i just go to work and then i have to go back to jail asap every day

>>13444337
I work for UPS, data input

>>13444340
no i don't, it's all white-collar crime guys here with me

>>13444442
How's your room like?

>>13444442
What do you do? I want to apply
>>13444444

>>13444470
I have a TV, shelf with books I borrowed from our library, bathroom, night stand with a lamp and a bonsai (gift from friend) and a bed. Pretty bland but I don't want anything else really.

>>13444503
there you go, bud
https://www.indeed.com/cmp/UPS/reviews?fcountry=ALL&fjobtitle=Data+Entry+Clerk

>>13444537
Your own cell I guess? Fuck having a roommate in jail. I guess that might not be too bad in white collar jail though.

>>13444579
Yeah my own.
Exactly, that's the only reason why I am thinking I'd rather stay. I even made some good friends while in here that are staying for a long time so I'd miss them

>>13444310
what the fuck is wrong with you? you're making $1k a month and are content with that? saving $12k a year is nothing. you're in jail for fucks sake. when was the last time you touched a vagina fag? what kind of dumb shit is willing to trade a year of their life for the opportunity to bank $12k in savings?
>if I stay here for 10 years I can save $120K!!!

>>13444310
Yea you should stop drinking you are an alcoholic

>>13444712
life isn't about pussy you idiot, I am living rent-free and don't have to care about food. I can get a better job than the one I have now if I try, and I have literally 0 other liabilities other than work so I can use my time to learn new skills

>>13444741
i'm going to a therapy twice a week, working on it, don't worry

>>13444766
You're based asf anon, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Might as well exploit the prison-industrial complex as much as you can

>>13444766
>life isn't about pussy
might want to get that test checked. have another onions

>>13444839
thanks bro

>>13444926
I can set up a tinder date in my office if I ever get as desperate as you, but I'd rather off myself at that point I think

>>13444310
Yeah. As soon as you get out of jail, withdraw all of your savings, burn it in a big pile in a visible area, then kill yourself.

>>13444310
>>13444537
Wow, this is actually pretty based

Basically what my life except for my dog, gf, and gaming PC. Not like I get to enjoy those things anyways while being a wagecuck

>>13445006
Ooh someone's salty

Fact: drunk drivers are the most powerful race in the world

Proof:when we crash into you you die and we don't

>>13444926
You're an ape brained slave to a wet hole.

>>13445186
yeah try crashing into a semi retard

>>13444537
Sounds pretty comfy

>>13444537
You're experiencing what life will be like for all wagies in 20 years. Glad you enjoy it!

I got arrested for weed possession (felony possession because concentrates are a felony) and had to stay in a cell with 5 people
one slept on the floor
our beds were shit, old sweat covered books were used as pillows
food was shit, no water unless you get it from the sink faucet by the toilet
dehydration, decay, and just stink and heat and creepy fuckers
the guards took my socks and underwear and I had to go into debt to other prisoners for dirty used ones

how did you get a nice jail

>>13444996
kek, no you can't. cause you're on work release faggot.

This is a larp anyway. I can't imagine you actually have your own cell on a work release sentence. You don't have a tv, bookshelf, or bonsai tree either. 3.5 months is time in a county jail where you'd be sharing a block with 30-40 other inmates. maybe 1/4 of whom are also on work release. nice bait though.

>>13446235
OP is probably white and you're not

>>13446235
sounds like you were in a beaner cell and OP is in norway or something.

>>13446317
I'm upper middle class white and got stopped in missouri with ~$250 worth of marijuana products I bought legally in colorado
I'm legitimately crazy from that whole experience even though I got bailed out within a couple days
I took the felony on my record because their deal was do 4 months there and 5 years probation or fight it and I settled for being a felon and 5 years probation

>>13444442
Damn now i wanna go to jail

>>13446303
That's actually common in countries like Norway. Breivik has a fucking playstation and an extra cell with work out equipment. His sleeping cell has it's own bathroom with tiled floors. If I'm not mistaken he also has a third "work" cell where he writes his books or wathever

What the fuck I love jail now.

>ITT burger people learn why sandniggers love european jails.

>>13446235
Whenever Americans shitpost about their freedom i think about jail statistics

>>13444766
based
if all goes down the shitter for me I will rob a jewelry store put it all in link and then turn myself in for the next couple of years.

t. germanfag prision here is like a tiny vacation

>>13446404
it's bad and I'm nearly certain it was a private prison with occupancy percentage profits
another thing that's fucked is all the therapists, psychologists, doctors I went to it didn't really help me
I got tons of pills from them though and nearly OD'd taking an entire prescription of ativan

the best part about this is, I'm basiclly unemployable but I've lived like a neet since
I've held bitcoin for 7 years now and have enough to chill and finally rented a $1000 a month house in early 2018
I'm just fucked in the head I can't seem to get anything going just really paranoid

>>13444310

>>13446417
>germanfag prision here is like a tiny vacation
you, uh, maybe wanna go next door to Holland for that jewelry store, you want a state all-inclusive vacation

>>13446373
that actually doesn't sound bad then. I'm a burger. we don't have it that nice here. might be OP is onto something...

kek, i'll do some research first which state vacation has the best reviews. but I think if I wanted a different prison system I would chose norway.

>>13446501
>>13446584
forgot to tag you fren

>>13445288
He'd still probably survive

>>13445288
You're a semi retard kekekek

>>13446353
>chosing to not own firearms

>>13446498
Martin, is that you?

>>13444310
Now this is a life hack

>>13445186
Keked pretty hard also technically you're right

>>13445240
Each one of us chooses his own personal hole, what is common for everyone is, well, the hole itself.

>>13446704
No who the fuck is martin

>>13447450

Martin is a boy with problems
Martin has a family history
Martin has too many nightmares
He lives in a fantasy
There's a danger that he'll take too far
His morbid curiosity

>a literal american prison inmate has more free time & disposable income than me

this is just unreal bro. like this is just sick. how twisted can life be?

>>13446363
He probably goes to some Norwegian jail.

>>13447518
Shut up pajeet