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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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13343204 No.13343204 [Reply] [Original]

>started new job
>chill place, own office
>everyone seems cool
>expect this one mid manager faggot called Steven
>literally walks around the office for hours on end talking to people
>laughs extremely loud at his own jokes
>makes literal dick jokes to female staff
>can hear him even with door closed
>no idea how he works here

Why is there always a normie prick like this in every office?

>> No.13343219

>>13343204
Waste him

>> No.13343297

Leave a complaint with HR saying he's verbally sexually harassing you.

>> No.13343330

Mine's called Chris. Leaves empty Ice Cap cups all over the office.

>> No.13343347
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13343347

>>13343204
Start calling him bub.

>> No.13343416

>>13343204
I knew you would start talking shit, Mike.
I rule this office you punk, everyone loves me.
Dont think you can come here and start judging people the first week.
THIS MEANS WAR.

>> No.13344030

>>13343416

FUCK YOU Steve - no one gives a fuck about your hiking trip plans this weekend

>> No.13344042

>>13343204
this is why I'm afraid to try getting a new job even though the one I'm in pays less than what I could get elsewhere, my current job is so comfy that I'm not sure I would like anywhere else in comparison.

>> No.13344053

>>13343416
This is Greg, we are gonna have a little talk. Please schedule an appointment with me ASAP.

>> No.13344082

>>13344030
>>13344053
>>13343204
Hi this is Karen, Jonathan's secretary. He scheduled a compulsory arbitration session for you all next week Saturday. Let's try keep our synergy together and our KPIs up until we circle back.

>> No.13344138

>>13344082

Hi Karen thanks for refocusing us on our North Star. Let's not try to boil the ocean here.

>> No.13344155

Tom here, we should all do lunch and see if we can brainstorm some ideas so we can come together as a group again for our common goal.

>> No.13344171

>>13343416
I am reporting all this to Margie in HR if you guys don't calm it down here.

>> No.13344220

>>13344171
Hi Jess, Karen here again. Jonathan said we should not report it to HR unless arbitration is unsuccessful. He was recently on a spiritual retreat and wishes to be more 'laissez-faire' about things.

>> No.13344222

Rufie him and tie him to a cross and burn him alive

>> No.13344224

>>13344171
Speaking of Margie, she sure has a nice pair doesn't she? Too bad her ass is so flat, haha I kid I kid, though she is nice looking and she isn't fat like Karen, I'd do her.

>> No.13344231

>>13343204
op, if you're sexually attracted by your boss there's no problem

>> No.13344238

>>13344155
We'll have to touch base on filing a report concerning your repeating digits.

- Peter

>> No.13344262
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13344262

>>13344224
Karen is a squirter

>> No.13344267

>>13344224
Epic bro! You heading over to Sportsies after work for a couple brews? Heard that hot intern from marketing will be there - never know!!

>> No.13344277

>>13344220
Hey Karen it's Dave, you can disregard what Jonathan said, his little spiritual retreat has lead to a few other bad decisions on his part and has earned his termination as a result. Rebecca who oversees HR is working on terminating all the incels in this thread already so if you can get with her we'll go from there.

>> No.13344278

There's silent giant 7'6" black guy in my office who will walk past the urinal and obliterate the toliet with his piss and then just walk out without washing his hands. Also, he's so tall that he basically can see me shitting over the stall wall in his peripheral vision. If I hear the bathroom door slam open while I'm shitting I know whats coming.

>> No.13344457

Hey guys it's Stacey's birthday so we are doing a whip round to buy her some new chlamydia tablets. Can you sign her card too please?

>> No.13344476

BANANA BREAD RECIPE

>> No.13344480

SORRY EVERYBODY I AM STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE EMAIL.

>> No.13344481

>>13344277
Hi, this is Jonathan. I'm using Karen's PC as you have deactivated my email address. I'll see you in court, I know you're just mad because I fucked your hippie of a wife on that retreat.

Enjoy your infidelity proceedings you cunt.

>> No.13344494

>>13344481
THAT IS IT!!!

I AM REPORTING ALL THIS TO MARGIE NOW! ENJOY YOUR DAY OF OFFICE COMMUNICATION RE-TRAINING. YOU ARE NOT TO USE YOUR WORK COMPUTERS FOR NON BUSINESS USE!

>> No.13344570

>>13344457
Top lel

>> No.13344586

*company wide email*

Hello all

Please can I remind you all to flush properly when using the toilet. This is the second time this week that the middle one in the males toilet has been blocked.

Thank you

Wagie McChucklefuck

>> No.13344848

>>13344030
I was going to invite you and let you test my new bike this weekend.
But you can forget that!

>> No.13345138

Hi Luke,

Please stop posting on 4Chan.com
It has been listed as a child pornography website, and on multiple terror lists.

We also found disturbing images on your computer, of a Sergey Nazarov in various compromised positions. Please schedule time with HR for a formal review,

René