/biz/ - Business & Finance

you have to fight meme questions with meme answers. theres no original way that will work

either joke
>potato chips

or
>im a perfectionist

Shemale porn

>Idk I don't focus on that shit

>>13251672
It's a basic normie shit-test. Congrats, you failed.

i spend all of my time on an anime forum about digital ones and zeros

Fittin this big dick into my pants

I work too hard.

Honestly?
My balls are too big and its annoying to wear anything except joggers.

I think my optimism can get the best of me sometimes. That's actually why I'm here! Because I thought by now bitcoin would be $50k-$100k but it's not and I ended up getting rekt!

Trying to find balance between my natural instinct to be a purist with trying to find the right functional pathways for the business

>>13251753
best post itt

>>13251657
i unironically hate all women and it is probably the reason i cant get a job in 2019

>>13251845
If you hate women so much that you can't contain it for an interview then you need to work on yourself

>>13251657
I'm gay.

I can't stop successfully convincing people to an hero and i don't know why

>>13251833
Beautiful, I'm gonna use that

>>13251920
lol bro imagine worshipping women so much that you would let them be your boss or hold HR power over you

they are literal parasitic scum that are only good for fucking and for paying rent

Brown women

>>13251657
The fear of success

>>13251657

Before I ghost the company I usually shit on my boss's desk

>>13251657
>Interviews, literally the bane of my professional career. For some reason I get very nervous.

How would HR take an honest answer.

Weakness? Me? I'm an addict... mentally, I mean. I have the mind of an addict. If you put crack in front of me I wouldn't necessarily smoke it, however, if you somehow got me to try it once by force then I would probably be pawning my grandmas jewellery within 3 weeks. It's a real problem and means I avoid things (except gambling shitcoins) that could bring out addictive behaviour.

>>13252030
Say you have self control problems. Addictive personality is bs. We all are addicted to shit we love.

>>13251657
Your eyes qt HR.
Now give me your number and gimme da gibs

Bullets and thai insurance commercials

>>13252071
Haha you reminded me of the Thai insurance commercials, they hit you hard always

>>13252061
I don't believe in free will

>>13252084
Agree'd. Only communists believe in free shit

>>13251657
Fighting the Jews

>>13251695
K E K
this

>>13251657
>I'm a bit of a perfectionist and can't sleep well unless I know I did my job as well as possible with the tools and support provided
literally just answer this, brainlets eat it up

>>13251657
"that I haven't done my best to enforce the will of Allah"

If rejected for being a religious fuck, sue for discrimination.

>>13251753
Based

>>13251753
Unironically hired but not for finance

>>13251657
>My biggest weakness? Well I guess that'd be my psychopathic tendencies. Haha, just kidding!

state a weaknesses not related to the job like mathematics or chemistry or philosophy and make it a medium sized list

>>13251657
I'm a perfectionist and I can't help touching women.

>>13251684

Ah, we love honesty here Anon.
Do you take or receive? Have you been to Patong Beach? Many lady boys,

>>13251833
what do you mean by "purist"

>>13251657
my penis is too big for most girls

>>13251657
"OCD."

And then pray they don't understand how OCD works.

This question is of no value and undermines my confidence in your ability as managers. Why would you wish to torpedo your chances of hiring an intelligent employee by insulting them with such a question? I am skilled. I perform. I deliver. As management it is your job to identify areas of improvement and assist staff in improving. By asking this question you're telling me that you're not confident in your ability of this key managerial task, and thus decreases my confidence in you. Your image as a confident and capable manager is important to your staff and I'd recommend you never ask another candidate such a self-destructive question.

>>13251986
lmao peek /biz/

>>13252214
For western europoors this is kind of the way to go. Either this (has one downside: Lots of times the question is asked in reference to the job you are being interviewed for or, if not, it may still seem little too off-topic) or name smth minor that you solved by doing something everyone in the business world appreciates.
>Im not good with keeping track of appointments in my head. Luckily we have all sorts of electronic gadgets to help me schedule my day. Ive been using Outlook and my synced (insert shitphone) for years now.
>I have a weakness of clustering my desk up with papers, so Ive been trying to do most of my work on the computer instead of piling up paperwork.

I feel like murricans should answer with memeanswers instead, because you are talking shit 24/7.
>Im a perfectionist bla

"Do you really want to play this game? This is the kind of game where the only winning move is to not play."

>>13251657
18 naked cowboys in the shower

>>13251657
Big ole anime tiddies

>>13251753
gonna use this one

>>13251657
whenever i see a female in a higher position i rape them at night

I struggle to make meaningful connections with members of the opposite sex

Oh, and my core could use some work

>>13251657
I don't know why
Blonde hippy chicks with dreads give off all the red flags of being grimy and something to avoid but fuck me its hot

>>13251695
What's the correct response?

Inability to delegate.

Your weakness should also be a strength.

>>13251986
Lol bro imagine Marissa Mayer having a 600m net worth and turning out better work in a month than you will in your entire life

I have a cuck fetish and can't help it

>>13251657

Having to sell myself to you for money.

>>13251657
>well, I suppose my biggest weakness may be that I'm unable to recognize my biggest weakness. Can we move on?

>>13251753
kek

>>13254672
This. Stubbornness is also one that can be played both ways.

>>13251657
Sometimes I think too critically when making simple decisions. In previous lines of work this has proven a great strategy for preventing operational losses, but I understand that this habit can be a hindrance for management when assessing a new employee's competence. I have been working to reserve this energy & hyperfocus only for more complicated and risk-intensive business decisions.

>>13254650
sometimes i work too hard
has to be said with straight face

>>13255163
u think they havent heard this a thousand times and know that u are full of shit?

>>13251657
traps

>>13251657
>unzip pants, proudly reveal micropenis while maintaining intense eye contact

>>13251672
This guy fucks. He also does well during job interviews.

>>13252746
>doesn't even know what it's like to truly express yourself without selling out to other people's expectations
never gonna make it

>>13252962
The reason this will never work is because it requires status and credibility upon delivery and you’re the desperate faggot actually interviewing for a job lmao

>>13254916
Female detected.
>resigned in 2017
>spokeswoman for google
Fucking lmao. Next time you rattle off some female executive avoid the cabalists. Being part of cultist social club is a bad long term strategy and shows poor judgement, regardless of sex.

>>13251657
Femdom and lezdom

>>13251695
What the fuck is a "shit-test?" Do normies really spend their whole lives just testing each other and being tested by each other?
Imagine living life jumping through hoops for other people, what a joke.

>>13255448
It comes from the pua sphere. A shit test is when a woman says or does something to determine whether you are a conforming desperate beta or indepndent non-needy alpha male with other options. The woman doesn't really do this consciously. It's just how they're wired. They insintcively want the guy who has the best chance of insuring their survival and giving them strong healthy babies.

>>13251657
I lie compulsively about my weaknesses.

>>13254269

Good post for noticing the difference between europoors and muricans. Americans are just insane in general.

>>13255187

Of course they did. What they're indirectly testing is your ability to bullshit.

>>13251657
That I sometimes love the jew too much. For example, yesterday I donated 1000$ to my bank, money I seriously needed for food.

>>13255969
so desu neyo

>>13251695
This
>>13254650
Something about volunteering for non-whites

>>13251657
My humongous cock

>>13255944
This shit won't fly anywhere, you have to talk about something that is not a major weakness but there was some space for improvement so you recognized it and solved it. "I am a perfectionist" is a meme now even for the most retarded-15-people-company HRs.

...Ninjitsu users who can shield their body with chakura...

I'm a porno addict. HD, SD, 4k, 8k, I got it. Backdoor whore #48 vhs in mint con, that's me. I've tried therapy. I've had a couple of incidents in public, I need help but the docs advice just don't cut it. I need this job man, I gotta buy new video tapes...