/biz/ - Business & Finance

>be me
>son of a traditional jewish middle class family
>educated
>decide to start a merchant business with muh boy
>set up shop at the busiest port city in the world
>sell incense and essential oil type shit
>tell everyone it treats allergies, keeps pests away, treats respiratory problems, so on and so on
>business is doing prettaayy good
>get married to a conservative qt3.14
>have daughter
>years go by
>business is still doing well
>daughter gets knocked up by some fucking bard ass goyim
>bard dips out
>have idea
>talk to my business partner, he loves it
>make up a story about how daughter got pregnant by god and shit
>use my education to draw on mythology and write a bunch of crazy shit just to throw people off
>write about 3 smooth genius elder dudes
>they bring gifts to my bastard grandson consisting of the incense and tree sap that I sell and gold
>people think my wares are as valuable as gold
>me and my boy's frankincense and murr business starts FUCKING BOOMIN BRUH
>my business partner, Job, wants a book about him too
>why not
>Job and I become the wealthiest merchants in the world
>mfw 2051 years later, shvartzas and goyim still take my subliminal advertising campaign serious