/biz/ - Business & Finance

Have I given you any reason not to hire me? I'd like to hear it if so. And what the fuck is wrong with blondie's mouth? I'll show myself out.

Excuse me I believe “boss” is singular and you should use “he” or “she” instead of “they.” Dumb fucks

>>11966080
Where's the door?
later wagecucks

This table long as fuck. No.

>>11966080
has anyone here been interviewed by a "team" like this before? the most people ive been interviewed by was 3

>>11966080
>Could you please specify the working hours?
>How many other applicants are you planning to interview?
>How does the interview process look?
>What kind of help will you give me during my first week in order to make me familiar with my tasks?
>How many colleagues will I have/work with?
>"I would like to ask a personal question if you don't mind: What motivated you to work at this company/stay at this company?"

Just ask 2-3 of these and you are set.

"ill consider your job offer and get back to you"

>>11966080
Which version of solitaire are your systems running?

>>11966080
How long until I get a turn with chingchong?

>>11966259
I thought these types of interviews only happened in movies. I have been interviewed by three people once and it was dreadful. they just kept hammering me with questions.

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

>>11966166
Did you just assume that there are only two pronouns? Thanks for coming out today, we'll let you know.

blurt out:
kikes did 9/11
taxation is theft
i didn't want this job anyway

>>11966080
"btw i'm a girl"

>>11966362
Also,
"You can't fire me! I quit!"

For the record. I HATE being interviewed by women. Women should NEVER be in a position to interview a person. I always have great conversations with male interviewers, but all female interviewers are deceitful. You may think the interview went great, but in reality she hated you. Men always show their feelings, they don't hide them like pussys.

>>11966259
I've been interviewed for a software job in government that had 5 people at the table as well as one on phone. For the most part only 1 or 2 of them directed the interview and then the others interjected with questions or comments on more specific details.

It's not that bad, the most important thing is just be confident and talk to them like a human being and not a worm.

>>11966387
*tips fedora*

Depending on the situation you say no thanks for your time or you ask one smart, non desperate seeming question that can be answered innocently. Depending on how the vibes of the interview are

>>11966321

>>11966387
So i take it, being a man, you don't hide these feelings and tell them to the women?

>>11966080
Ps: its not listed on my resume, but for legal reasons i must say im a sex offender.

Unironically though, I use
> On which criteria will my performance be gauged
> How would you describe the "culture" of the company
>Do you forsee any obstacles in the near future that could lead to a downsizing or restructuring.
>How would you describe the companies growth over the last 5 years and what has been the biggest challenge to growth?
>when i stack the lettuce beef and tomato on the bun, is the order important?

>>11966321
Right away but it's a trick fren

>>11966344
remember batman with Michael Keaton?

Women interviews have notoriously been easy. Polite and respectful with a flirty vibe. It's just a wamen, easy to manipulate.

>>11966461
>>when i stack the lettuce beef and tomato on the bun, is the order important?

>>11966479
You must be chad.

>>11966387
>yes everything is going well!
>god why do you worry so much about me mom?

>>11966080
Where do you see yourselves in 5 years?

>>11966569
So autistic that you ask the interviewer an retarded question like that.

>>11966278
>>Could you please specify the working hours?
actual fail. corporations are looking for slaves who want to sacrifice their lives for the company. asking this question will definitely make sure you are not hired
>How many other applicants are you planning to interview?
fail, makes you look weak
>How does the interview process look?
stupid, in the OP; it has already started
>What kind of help will you give me during my first week in order to make me familiar with my tasks?
help. fucking kek. we're hiring you to help us out with this.
>How many colleagues will I have/work with?
go home autist. there will people in the work office and you will have to work with them.
>"I would like to ask a personal question if you don't mind: What motivated you to work at this company/stay at this company?"
not bad, except for the "let me ask you a personal question" part. gay af; it's not personal because they are at work interviewing you. perfectly normal question to ask.

you come across as socially inept at best and only having ever worked an hourly job at worst

>>11966166
Don't assume their gender.

>>11966479
this. every interview i've had with a woman was just normal conversation that had nothing to do with the job. women managers are usually there just for show anyway and have no clue what they're doing, much less how to give an interview
>>11966487
yeah, it helps i guess

>>11966311
Keked

>>11966080
No questions, I think I know what to expect.
If you haven't already interrogated them during the interview, you're not going to make a good impression by mumbling a pointless question at this point.

>>11966619
based and, dare i say it, red pilled

>>11966080
No nigs in here? Bunch of racists.

AYO! HOL UP! HOL UP! U BE SAYIN DAT U FINNA STAHRT PAYIN ME N SHEEEEEEIT??

>>11966080
>Do you have any questions?
*crunch*
*crunch*
*crunch*

>>11966080

I'm assuming this would be the final stages where you've already done phone, 1 on 1 screener, etc. and that this is the end of them probing you.

"Thank you again for your consideration today. I can't think of anything else pressing. Could anyone please show me the way out?"

Seriously if they're giving you an exit no need to drag it out with any ass kissing when they likely still have shit to take care of for the day or else they have to stay late. I'd be careful not to ask any basic stuff that was likely covered at some point in your last 3+ contacts with them. The only valid logistical question you could ask is for a estimate of their timeline given their consideration of other candidates to which you simply say great and then repeat above.

>>11966712
True, to an extent. I think that
>What motivated you to work at this company/stay at this company?
i.e. the >>11966619 version of the question would be a great way to end the interview.

>>11966080
Can you tell me about the company culture?
What does an average day look like for this position?
Why is this position open?
What would you expect from me as an employee?

>>11966852
based

>>11966404
Same here. 6 person panel for a software dev position as a financial institution. It was actually a breeze

>>11966216
kek, where was this answer in that "what will you do every day when you make it?" thread yesterday?
>be me
>BTC in the low 5 digits, BCH in the triple digits and BSV in the high 6 digits and rising
>Now have a crypto portfolio that I could never exhaust in 10 lifetimes of crazy hedonism
>Send out thousands of resumes every weekend, ensuring that I get invited to at least a few corporate interviews each day.
>Go in dressed like lil windex and hit on every career woman I encounter (except for the fatties)
>Ask for all sorts of loony perks like my own in-desk urinal, private sauna, you name it
>At the end of every day one of the career women married to some beta cuck secretly gives me a booty call
>mfw

>>11966387
this

to be honest men and women shouldn't even be working together. i mean everybody always goes "what, of course they should!" but should they? it's been shown again and again that it's a bad idea. sexual harassment, both men and women can be less themselves due to sexual tension, men want cooler rooms while women then start freezing, salary complaints. it's just a bad idea. im not saying a company needs to not hire both sexes but it probably would benefit the company if they could just put them in separate rooms and at least keep them separate. and yes, have men interviewing men and women interviewing women. at least the first interview.

im a virgin btw

>>11966387

Abosolutely this. Women in HR are always double-faced.

>>11966939
>to be honest men and women shouldn't even be working together.
To be honest, almost nothing in the modern world should be as it is, but being right about something doesn't really count for anything even if you can sometimes prove it.

>>11967001
i think it'll loop back around eventually as more and more young girls notice how sad all the single and childless women in their 30s are

>>11966278
Don't listen to this or you are lost... You need to have set questions that you want to have answered prior to even going into the interview. They need to be job/company specific and maybe throw in a personal question with someone's experience.

>>11967548
What do you mean with someones experience? The interviewer?

>>11966080
What would you say are the biggest challenges your company is facing today? How do you think they will be resolved?

>>11967424
Women don't think long-term so that's not going to happen. At best the government is going to step further in and demand more of your money in order to fund their lifestyles while even fat women become the domain of the rich and Chad-like and the only thing left for normal males are surrogate women (trannies).

>>11967795
>the only thing left for normal males are surrogate women (trannies).

God I can't wait for the future