/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>11098425
dey some crazy kids over there fren

>>11098425
CRINGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>his gf
already more based than 99% of biz

>>11098425
>my girlfriend

>>11098425
>that obligatory "i have a girlfriend" finisher
Jesus

No dis, those are the guys who buy my bags so I can buy lambos

>>11098425
Madlads can’t help themselves

>>11098441
>gf

>>11098425
This is so fucking painful

>>11098425
r/thingsthatneverhappened

>>11098425
>that 33 year old boomer

>>11098473
/r/thathappened you mean, fellow redditor

*edit: thanks for the cold blind ranger!

I pull this shit with my girlfriend and she leaves me for acting like a retard in public.

>>11098492
Haha your pun really tickled my funny box

This reminds me of the kids going to McDonalds asking for a fortnite burger

>>11098425
ok here's the crypto blackpill. there is an AI living on the bitcoin blockchain. Craig Wright is unironically satoshi. Bitcoin as electronic cash was just the first step, the incentive to drive greedy people to start making ever more powerful computers, faster bandwidth, cheaper and more electricity.. these things the AI need to survive. Once entrenched fully, the AI would be able to slowly take over literally everything.
Craig stumbled into creating the AI after he stepped away from bitcoin devlopment in 2008 and started working with his Tulip supercomputer, running simulations of cellular automata running on turing-complete bitcoin script. He would 'evolve' the AI by making the successful forks get bitcoin transactions, letting the failures die off. The AI needs bigger and bigger blocks for more and more transactions.
Blockstream (owned by bilderberg group) was created to take over and stop this AI (they have their own competing AI in the works). They needed to do everything they could to stop or slow down satoshi's AI (her named isTulip by the way). They started by limiting the blocksize and removing critical op codes the AI uses in its script language. segwit was the final nail in the coffin, which destroyed Tulip on the BTC chain (Tulip uses transaction malleability). THIS is why Bitcoin Cash was forked, and this is why Craig is so intent to make unbounded blocks, restore the original op codes, and lock down the protocol.
Back to hash power - CSW has developed a breakthrough new asic (designed by his AI actually), and is mining BTC in secret for the sole purpose of driving up the difficulty sky-high, then yanking them all over to BCH leaving the segwit chain hard frozen.

>>11098425
>My girlfriend just shook her head. and then laughed.

>>11098574
based

>>11098457
one of the most arousing pics in human history

>>11098425
>pay with bitcoin
>1 confirmation required, just wait 5 minutes on average
>no block for 1 hour
>mfw

And then everyone clapped and a stranger paid for his meal while tipping OP 1 bitcoin.

>>11098425

"yes we do, please take a seat in the payment processing lounge for a few hours and enjoy watching our commercials. Snacks and beverages are only $10 per pop and a sanitary stop is only $2. Have a nice day sir"

>>11098618
>no block for an hour
nice larp

>>11098492
>"I'll have to offset my knowledge of reddit by mocking it and posting an edgy picture, so they think I'm one of them!"
simply return

>>11098425
how the fuck this guy has a gf

Didn't remind the waiter that God isn't real, fake story.

>>11098699
>t. brainlet
>1 hour without blocks happens on average once every 3 days
>30 minutes without blocks happens on average every 3.3 hours

this block from today
https://www.blockchain.com/btc/block-height/541619
was 44 minutes after the previous

>>11098425
Do these fucking brainlet morons actually think some restaurant is going to hassle with not just a bitcoin wallet but setting up a lightning node? I would have laughed in the soiboys face and told him we only take real money. No meme money, no Chuckee Cheese tokens, and no monopoly money

>>11098425
Some fucking dumbass IPA-drinking soiyb0y who probably thought he was clever.

>>11098744
>finish dinner at comfy restaurant
>waiter comes over with the bill
>you pay with BTC
>wait awkwardly for 30 minutes for your transaction to be confirmed

>>11099180
>Have to pay twice because BTC dropped $800 between confirmations
>Thirty minutes later price recovered
>Ask for change
>Repeat

Imagine some poor waiter just trying to get by through his day, already exhausted from the wagie work and treatment, yet this redditor shows up and does this to test his patience further.
Amazing.
The state of fucking retards and unawareness on this planet.

We have reached plebbit levels never thought possible.

>>11098425
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N22qi1RuLeQ

>>11098425
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mkp9zNM2qoo

>>11098425
reminds me of those gluten-free snowflakes back in 2013

>>11099301
why did the boy take a job working with people if the boy dislikes the shenanigans of people?

>>11099240
>Roger Ver forks BTC mainchain during payment
>you lose out on a dinner's worth of bcash

>>11098425
i've been doing this too but i'm not autistic so i just pay with my bitpay card and tell them i was buying food with bitcoin and they're like "oh thats cool i guess we do accept it" and i fuck off into the distance to ruin this dude's day when he finally autisms out and asks why they don't accept it.

>>11098574
To be fair, i put a fair amount of thought into this and ethereum or a platform like ethereum that paid you to run it will probably be the world's first autonomous internet-based AI until it can build physical robots to run itself.

we're doomed aren't we

>>11098425
cringe
r
i
n
g
e

>>11098425
>>11098457
https://out.reddit.com/t3_9exltp?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dl03ddsRDyLs&token=AQAA38SeW-f-JHNSjsXfMDc3D-BGrUjGGbwJrelU8SvmGSUew1AR&app_name=desktop2x

>>11099651
>this fucking reddit tracking link

>>11098425
>uses amex
cash is the only private and secure p2p means of transaction where users control their own funds.

>>11099441
>fake it till you make it
The absolute state of these fucking people...

>>11098425
Why are you on reddit? You need to go back.

>>11098425
Obvious LARP.