/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>10895534
Gross

>>10895534
>renkobro end of august

>>10895534
>performance review

>>10895534
Flexible hours

>It's Shelleys birthday we're all going out for pizza later everyones going, you in?

Open office space environment

>>10895838
>>10895851
>You can work any 12 hours you want.
>Also please stop tilting your monitors away from my office. I can't see your screen.

Competitive salary

>we're looking for a team player capable of taking care of everyone else's fuck ups. we realize you're smarter than the position but we'll keep you there to keep things from coming off the rails

Diversity awareness workshop

>Starting pay is $9/hr
>Drug-Free Work Zone

>>10895534
>There was extra money in the budget but instead of giving out bonuses management decided to get the office new printer instead!

I got a raise this week bros. Felt so good all day then realized how banal it is to be happy about fucking money. When my cousin gave birth I didn't even get this happy. What have I become?

when did memes go from simple visual displays of common emotion to a collection of hellish visions forming an alternate nightmare reality

>>10896052
>visual displays of common emotion

this is really what it is

>>10896052
>alternate nightmare reality
>alternate nightmare
>alternate

anon, there is no alternate reality. this IS reality.

>>10895534
>Forcing memes

>>10896020
>tfw negotiating my payrise next week

The thing is, more pay just means more investment into my index funds

>>10895805

You did an excellent job this year anon! You get a solid 3 out of 5 meeting expectations.

OK EVERYBODY!

For yourrrrrrr AWESOME PERFORMANCE LAST QUARTER, WE BROKE 3 MILLION IN SALES ...YOUR ALL GETTING A PIZZA PARTY YEAH!!!

>actual quote from work

>>10895942

I wish my company was that generous. Last year, they threw a $60,000 party that most of us weren't invited to.

>>10896125

>company picnic
>some employees playing soccer
>I’m sitting at picnic table with some people talking
>my boss is sitting next to me
>really hate working with him, he flys into a rage over trivial things, micromanages, disrespectful
>while I’m talking to him he gets hit square in the face by a soccer ball
>everyone laughs
>he leaves the picnic early

>>10896052
When hilldog lost, thankfully

>>10896142
they just gave us a 75 dollar voucher to BUY OUT OWN UNIFORMS FROM THE COMPANY STORE they're all golf polo and 55 bucks

laptop bags are 85

i want off this ride, im rotting my brain for 9 hour leaving me only 4 for crypto research

>mfw my hr is a black guy

>Great work this year, Mr Goldberg is so impressed with your work he has authorized a payrise from $12/hr to $12.65/hr, keep it up and next year you could hit the big one three.

>tfw about to start a 16 hour shift

wish me luck goys

>>10896100
Just embrace it anon

>>10895534
>You kindly greeted Stacey this morning so naturally she filed a complaint to human resources

>>10896241
WEW. I got a 5 day vacation. Fuck waging full time. I'm about to stop waging entirely. Feels good.

>>10895534
Frescoposters are MM/SB/David Hogg's crew, meant to devalue our pepes. Don't let them crash the meme economy! #neveragain

How do you land an office gig like itt?

I don’t live in a metropolitan city, but I finish my bachelors come December.

>hi Jim, can you please finish that company e-training course by tomorrow? thanks

>>10896695
call center farm, literally any office posti0on at a large company

>>10896760
MILKERS

I actually have a company bbq tomorrow. There's gonna be beer and burgers. Should I try to socialize or just fucking leave as soon as I can? Don't get along with most people there desu.

>>10896847
dont be a fucking autist have a beer and burger, be the 2nd or 3rd person to leave

>>10896108
>The thing is, more pay just means more investment into my index funds
You say this like it's a bad thing

>>10895534
>company sports team

>>10896988
not a bad thing, but my life at present doesn't change

>he doesn't authentically enjoy his job

i feel sad for you buddy

>>10897241
Not everyone has the luxury to do this. As of now, someone needs to do the work which most of us would regard as unpleasant, be it slaughterhouse butcher, burger flipper, toilet washer, etc. The idea of large swathes of people being occupationally mismatched who would be more happier in their natural role as a menial, low-paid, wage worker is mean and patronizing.

>>10896125
Hahaha same at my work.

> YEAH WE PASSED 30M IN REVENUE GOOD JOBS GUYS!
> NO PAYRISES FOR ANYONE!

And they wonder why nobody gives a shit.

>>10897482
And they can't find any good employees.

Really makes me think...

It will kill the business in the long run.

>>10897241
>Job
>Enjoy
You're talking about a career not a job

>>10896114

Literally my job.
>exceed sales expectations
>top-notch reviews for customer service
>only person that can fix things in my without calling our tech guy
>told I do a fantastic job, get 3/5 on every category each year and get one small raise
>wake up every day hating my job a bit more than the day before

>>10897766
Just a classic example of why reviews are fucking garbage, the company won't give you high ratings because you can use that as part of salary negotiation so they'd rather kill your morale to save a few bucks that they'd blow on utter shit elsewhere in the company.

Mine I took on the job role of not even joking probably 3 people and they decided to focus on the fact that they perceived I didn't do one job enough even though I headed and completed a huge, company changing project under "umbrella"

>>10897831
Employers are retarded

They would rather not give somebody a raise, forcing them to quit then they have to waste literally hundreds of hours training new people constantly, hundreds of hours wasted to save a few thousand bucks, terrible trade off

>>10897766
Dude get friendly with HR (kiss ass and become a snitch) it's the only way you advance in a corporation

>>10896241
You can do it bro. It is better to work 16 hours than 2 hour shifts of commuting. When you get home, you can take a nice nap. I believe in you

>>10896241
>>10898019
2 eight hour shifts*

>>10896934
This guy fuck

>>10896241
I can Trade Bitcoin and make a years salary in 15 minutes.

This meme makes me suicidal.