/biz/ - Business & Finance

What kind of disgusting person actually leaves a smell on their seat the next day?

>>10834786
Better hope your job doesn't have security cameras.

>>10834806
T. Virgin
Humans, like all mammals, have scent glands. These are particularly concentrated near the anus. Every human has a particular natural scent even when completely hygienic and clean. Give it a few years of sitting on the same cushioned seat 8 hours a day every day for a year and these oils will build up. Smell has to be the single most underrated sense when it comes to sexual attraction. It will tell you more than any other sense can and in half the time.

>>10834840

There aren't.

You're halfassing it if you don't lick them too.

>>10834874

I don't want to risk catching anything. A good wiff is enough to get me hard.

>>10834888
you get hard from the smell of feces?

>>10834888
>smells the food but won't taste it

Pearls before swine, what a waste of trips.

Not gonna blame you, these weeks i'v been photoshopping my dick in the face of my ex and some girls.

Be careful. I did this at a 24/7 gym at night after a woman left when it was only me. Somehow they noticed on the camera and I got banned.

>>10834941

with what? a gym seat?

>>10834985
Yeah, I thought I got lucky since when I arrived she was just on a bike for the entire time. So when she left, I waited a bit, then made my way over to the seat. Pretended to be trying to adjust it but it was pretty obvious on their camera which was in HD.

>>10835008

Should have grabbed a towel or something and wiped it down immediately after. Could have argued you had a foul smell and wanted to check the seat before you sat on it.

nonetheless that sucks

>>10834888
>>10835008
Can you faggots just get laid like normal people

>>10834941
>>10835008
what the fuck lol?

I literally do this all the time since I train late at night in a rural 24/7 gym, hence I'm the only one in the building.

Then again I'm 24 years old 6'5 with a chad body, so I doubt they'd suspect I'm into weird shit. Most people think I slay every night.

One time I found an old guy ducking into the girl's locker room, presumably to install a hidden camera. I didn't confront him because I was interested. I actually spent a few hours trying to find the damn thing myself. He comes back every now and then, waits in his car for hours pretending to read a book until I leave. He knows I'm onto him.

>>10835050
>claims to have a chad body
>spends hours in girls locker room looking for hidden camera

hmm something isn't adding up

>>10834941
>>10835008
Anon

>>10835036

what the fuck is going on in this thread

>>10835008
If this happened the way you said it happened then this is actually quite harsh I must say.

>>10835076
I've also paid for two hookers and a foot job this year

>>10835103
Extremely hot fantasies. I'm rock hard

>>10835050
>He knows I'm onto him.

No shit, he probably saw you on the camera. Ever sniff anything in there like the benches? I can imagine it must be heavenly

>>10835146

Why are you trying to prove something in a anonymous board, anon? Just let him talk.

You realize anon that the IT has probably sat in those seats too right?

>>10835155
Lol so get this... I only see him like 1-2x per year, usually in the summer. He came in about a month ago. Like 1 am. My car wasn't parked in the lot so he came in thinking no one else was there. He hid in the men's change room until I left.

Week later he pulls in again. But he knows I'm inside. He sits in his car pretending to read (it's pitch black) for god knows how long. I go out to my car, which is parked next to his, and just sit there for 30 minutes waiting to see if he moves. Nothing.

So then I leave in my car, drive around town for a bit, and drive past the lot again. I couldn't see anyone in the car so I parked about 500 feet away with the intention of catching him in the girl's locker room. But I wasn't entirely sure he had left his car. And it looked weird what I was doing. So I pulled out my phone and pretended to talk to someone, walking towards the gym. But as I got closer I realized he was still in his car. I kind of stopped for a minute then turned around. This fucker started his car and took off thinking I was on the phone with the cops.

I haven't smelled any benches. The girls don't use them. That hip exercise machine (innie-outie) is GOAT

>>10835163
Because I hate getting hung up on details, which the fags here always do

>>10835246
lmao, fuckin weirdo confirmed

>>10834786

Absolutely fucking pathetic. I hope you're caught on camerav and exposed, seatsniffer. That being said, I love the smell of pussy and ass. Bitches love when you eat them doggy and tickle their dirtstar with your nose. My one girl claims to hate anal but she doesnt mind basicly using my nose as a buttplug when I'm sucking her clit. She also doesn't mind making out with her ass scent all over my face.

>>10834786
no

>>10834806
This desu. No woman smells strongly enough in a good way to leave it on a seat. Kek.

>>10834843
I keep telling people that i learn interesting things on biz but they laugh at me

>>10834786
How could someone with such patrician tastes in regards to sex and attraction be the whipping bitch boy for their boss? It doesn't add up.

>>10834786
Inb4 the guys checking the cams snitch out on OP

>>10834941
>Somehow they noticed

mfw...

>>10834786
Kek wait until someone reviews the cctv and they see you being a fucking degenerate

why do I even come here anymore

Jesus christ you guys really are a bunch of virgin autists I thought it was a meme

>>10834888
>A good wiff is enough to get me hard
heh

>>10834786
This isn't /r9k/ you faggot.

>>10835733
fuck off this aint the place to act cool
u wont gain anything from trying to act like a chad here. absolutely nothing

>>10835216

Talk to him. Get to know him. It sounds like the two of you have a common interest and working together could prove beneficial for both parties.

>>10834840
This. OP I've been in the same position.
Also, as much as /biz/ hates wagecucking, working alone in the office on a Saturday with nobody else around is comfy as fuck.

>>10834786
I do that to my broworkers' seats, nomsayin? Someone's got to sniff up the testosterone.

>>10835761

>inb4 the old man is really a cop investigating a steroid distribution ring

>>10834786
Isn't there CCTV?

>>10836051

why would they have that in an office, except near the entrances?

>>10834843
T.dog

>>10835036
Normalfags get out of my board. Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

10/10 thread

>>10834888

I'd laugh if the boss knows about it and is building his repertoire of security tape footage of your degeneracy.

Lmao'd at these stories thanks biz

>>10835103
exposing American and human perversion

>>10834786
Better hope those extra work hours are paid OP.

>>10834786
IMAGINE

>female boss tells me to come in on saturday
>empty office
>masturbate in her chair for 30 minutes
>go home

>>10834786
You're in good company

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2008-04-29/emotional-buswell-admits-to-chair-sniffing-incident/2419558

I used to stay at this family’s house as an exchange student program. And they have a daughter who was so fucking hot and everytime she would change to her robes to shower after her volleyball practice, i would run over to her room and smell those fresh sweaty wet panties. I get rock hard even few years after just thinking about those sweaty pink panties wew

>>10834941
I cannot kek hard enough at this holy fuck

>>10836169
Exactly for the kind of shit OP is doing

>>10834786
my office doesn't have any qts.

>>10841218

Is it really that big of a problem?