/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>51000335
I was only 39 years old
>I loved my Zestimate so much, I had all the charts of it on my wall
>I pray to my Zestimate every night before bed, thanking it for the net worth I've been given
>"Zestimate is love" I say; "Zestimate is life"
>My husband hears me and calls me a slut
>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for my Zestimate
>I called him a limp-dicked faggot
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I'm crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it's really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It's my Zestimate
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear "Interest rates have dropped, rents are skyrocketing and there is no inventory."
>He grabs me and puts me down onto my hands and knees
>I'm ready
>I spread my myself for my Zestimate
>He penetrates me with his huge Zestimate past my cervix
>It hurts so much but I do it for my Zestimate
>I can feel my cunt tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please my Zestimate
>As he moves faster the heat begins to build between my legs
>Soon I'm in rapture with my first orgasm
>My body quivers as he thrusts and I scream in ecstasy "double digit annual increase in home valuation"
>Only my Zestimate can satisfy me
>He roars in mighty chimes of cash registers ringing as he fills my womb with equity growth
>My husband walks in
>My naked body is doused in my Zestimate's home appreciation and my husband sees my satisfied face for the first time in our marriage
>My Zestimate looks him straight in the eyes and says "Remodel the kitchen for an even bigger Zestimate faggot."
>My husband weakly nods his head in agreement as he sobs in the corner
>Zestimate leaves through my window
>Zestimate is love. Zestimate is life.

>>50978996
>any retard can go to a bank and borrow a fuck ton of money to buy a house
Then why don't they?

>squatting (aka adverse possession) is a legal way to gain property for free
>the process of squatting requires you to live on the property for a period as few as three years to as many as 40
>it needs to be obvious to anyone that visits the property that you are living there
>it is also helpful to make improvements and pay property taxes
>remote areas work best for this since fewer people come near the property
>rules for taking possession vary by state so it makes sense to do your homework
>even if the owner finds out you are there they will need to get a judgment in court to get you removed
>since squatting is not a criminal offense police can not keep you from off the property
>in fact without a judgment the owner can not enter it
Squatting is a fun way to have a nice home and potentially get it for free. So rentoid why aren't you squatting? It's the only way you'll ever get a zestimate.

>>50680547
>why would I ever need a house? we will all die one day.
Because we all need a place to live while we're alive
>why not enjoy yourself
I can assure you owning a zestimate makes me very happy
>it's not like you can take your money or assets with you when you're gone
It's not about taking it with you it's about leaving something for the people you care about

>>50562534
Stop copying me bitch! I'm the real Zesty Stacy.

>>50546611
>gets to be stay at home mom in part because can't get a real job
>husband supports her anyway
>he's able to make it rain without working hard because he's smart
>she bitches because he doesn't need to work hard
>secretly jealous he's so much smarter than her
This bitch should just welcome him vagina first into every room he wanders into because she'd be on the street if it wasn't for him

>>50507138
I told you so

>>50500837
>Just buy land and build your own house faggot
This is unironically the best way to get a zestimate but you need to patience and skill to pull it off and few zonées possess those.
> Or just live in an RV/Van.
Vehicles depreciate and you still need a place to park it. This plan basically locks you into poverty.

>>50490695
They keep trying to talk the market into crashing but a there are a few problems with that
>the cost of construction for a new home is still sky high. This is why builders are suffering. If they were gouging before they would lower prices. Instead they are halting construction and potentially going under because the lower price point leaves them no room for profit.
>there is woefully inadequate supply that builders now can not rectify for the reasons mentioned above.
>rents are through the roof and will keep escalating while inflation remains high and there inadequate housing stock
The net effect of this is people who rent now may very well be priced out for life. Better luck next lifetime rentoids.

>>50483347
One more time
>THERE (clap)
>IS (clap)
>NO (clap)
>SUPPLY (clap)

>>50452509
The crisis is that no one can afford a home and rents are skyrocketing. Hope you got a zestimate before you were priced out for life.

>>50352973
Of course everything on 4chan is real

>>50297914
I love how all these articles are focused on the last two years like they represent the entire history of the housing market. The reality is we are simply transitioning back to normal market conditions. Prices in some areas will correct but most areas won't see price decreases.

>>50276553
Women would call it "too dated"

>>50263051
Get in the pod rent slave.

>>50214433
That's because you're a parpaing bitch. I'm the real Zesty Stacy

>>50170031
Leaping rentoid detected

>Boondocking is dispersed camping on public land.
>When you boondock, there are no connections to water, electricity, and sewer like you’d find in a developed campground
>The National Forest Service, Bureau of Land Management (BLM), and Department of Fish and Wildlife are examples of public land management agencies that allow dispersed camping
>when you camp on public land you can only stay for a period of two weeks max then you have to move to a location at least 20 miles away so to live this way you will likely need a vehicle
>boondocking in camper vans has become very popular since the van acts as both your transportation and your home
>there is often no cost to boondock on public lands which makes this a lower cost alternative to renting
>additionally you can boondock for the night in certain rest areas and parking lots for certain big box stores (Walmart is famous for allowing this)
>Quartzsite, AZ is a famous winter boondock location when the population of the town grows from 3300 to about 750,000

Here you go rentoid, Zesty Stacy has another great alternative for how you can live without a zestimate. Have fun showering in your wet bath (you have to sit on your shitter while you bathe hehe).

>a type of theft, closely related to identity theft, where you put a home's deed in a different name
>You can either sell the deed to the property in a real estate scam or use it to claim any equity in the home
>Most of the properties that go through home title theft are vacation homes, rental homes or second properties, and unoccupied homes
>Properties that are not inhabited areat risk because you can start by squatting in unused homes, plus forged deeds can be made and the house sold without the knowledge of the real owner, especially if the owner isn’t checking in on that property regularly
>begin by committing identity theft, forging documents like a fake ID, Social Security card, or other official identifying documentation. This way a fraudulent “bill of sale” can be created that says you now have legal possession
>a HELOC can be opened in the homeowners name taking out available equity from the home
>The mortgage can be refinance the home once you have possession of the fraudulent deed, cashing out on the equity and taking the difference
>Homeowners can sometimes be lured into home title theft through refinancing offers, which are actually home sales in disguise

Here you go rentoids another way you might get some zestimate. I hope this helps you loser out.

>>50046303
He owns over 240,000 acres

>>50036436
Then don't do that. Just squat on land the owner has too much to think about.

https://www.thedailybeast.com/north-dakotans-freak-over-bill-gates-land-buying-mystery

>>50030648
It's not. Anyone who is over 30 and doesn't have a zestimate is fucked. And I mean royally and irrecoverably fucked. You missed your window and will be a rentoid slave for life.

>>50018256
Here's another rentoid complaining about the zestimate being too high. Should've bought when you could.

>>50022298
I wonder what this will do to the zestimates in those areas