/biz/ - Business & Finance

Open a youtube channel for the horse. With its name on it and a cute picture or drawing of its face as the logo.
I hire an artist on fiverr to make cute drawings of the horse for the wallpaper of the YT channel, and many other forms of drawn content.
Buy a decent camera and watch a few video tutorials about how to use it well. Then make video tutorials on how to care about your horse, how to train it, how to feed it, etc etc etc.
Keep the videos at 10-15 minutes max. At first nobody will watch the videos but keep producing good content anyways. Hire one of these pay-per-post agencies if necessary to make comments in your videos to kickstart the growth of your channel.
Eventually lots of people will watch it. You can trust me on that. Even if they never plan to ever have a horse, or ride one or whatever. Just show the damn horse doing cute things. People have lots of time to waste and they will watch. Especially once the Youtube algorithm kicks in and it starts recommending it to everyone under the sun.
Put affiliate links in the description to pages that sell stuff I use to take care of the horse. Hair combs, lotions, "special" feed for the horse, those tools that people use to trim their hooves, whatever. Sell merch also.
Eventually open a shopify store dropshipping all that garbage at a 300% markup. That's where all the big bucks come from.
Advertise for horse-related services at the end or middle of your videos. Does your fiancee want to go to church on marriage day riding a horse? Rent one! Contract this horse-renting service for those special occasions!

God damnn, I could think of a million more ways I could monetize a fucking horse and I'm half drunk from beer trying masquerade my crippling loneliness, but I would hit max post length.
You all are a bunch of fucking retards with no brains and I don't know why I spend my time here with you.