/biz/ - Business & Finance

Im going to need all you namefaggots to stop the chit chat, I need a pump magistrate over to C6.

We are now rotating additional technicians over to supplement the strain from LOL (Lack of Liquidity).

We will be operating at full pump today. Please wear all PPES and plan accordingly.

Gonna take the pump offline for a bit. To newer holders, this might be a moment of trepidation for you. Lean on your fellow Pajeets and utilize them as resources. When you see "Rajesh's and other "Top Men" in the thread, you should feel immediate comfort to the impacted area.

If you find yourself experiencing residual negative symptomology found in the pump being temporarily offline (Price drop, I'm Tired Posting, When/Where/How is RC Posting) DCA as hard as you can.

Will be back online ASAP.

CAN WE GET A VOLUNTEER PUMP MAGISTRATE TO HEAD DOWN JUST IN CASE TO PROVIDE SOME BACK UP TO THE CORE TEAM

CALL ME AT EXTENTION 777

>>51596144
explain how patterns "dont add up" right NOW

>>51573284
grats

>>50804845
40 here

i knew

COUGH

COUGH

AHEM

BITCH I SAID AHEM

It's pretty simple really...
>*hits pipe*
Several billion-dollar conspirators are openly operating a huge scam by over-shorting Gamestop (GME), with all regulators and government officials complicit in the fraud, all at the expense of noble 4chan & reddit NEETs. All financial reporting websites and metrics are wrong; the "bad guys" are somehow able to keep all these mega-shorts off their books with tricky accounting, but our esteemed reddit DD'ers have assured us - they still haven't covered!
>*hits pipe*
The entire stock market crash is because of GME. See, the hedge funds and investment banks need to continue selling assets in order to keep their over-exposed GME shorts from liquidating. The genius that is Ryan Cohen started a 'ticking clock' by announcing a stock-split dividend that *may* come into effect after June 2nd. Never mind how that would cause a short-squeeze... it just could, okay!?
>*hits pipe*
Once the market is in shambles, the whole financial system brought to its knees, the true MOASS will begin... the government, Federal Reserve and banking institutions will be powerless as the GME price starts to climb... 4-figures, 5-figures, 6-figures... they won't engage in any shenanigans, nor will they change rules, institute emergency measures, etc., because that would just be unfair! The entire system will have to implode and 4channers/redditors will be the only ones left standing, with riches beyond your wildest dreams.
>*hits pipe*
So, what do you say fellow 4channer... are you slurping the GME dip?

PUMP LINGUISTIC TECH HERE ILL FILL IN TIL SOMEONE MORE OFFICAL COMES DOWN

>>50733416
chase it like a little bitch go get it baby boy

PUMP TECHS: MAKE SURE YOU ARE WEARING YOUR SAFETY EQUIPMENT (PPE)

THIS IS NOT A JOKE. JOHN PUMPS JUST GOT HIS FUCKING HEAD ALMOST TAKEN OFF BY THE MORNING CANDLE

>>50715572

>>50714563
well said

pump magistrates have you clocked in yet?

Pump Magistrates, have you clocked in for your shift yet?

Gonna need an update, please and thanks.

>>50483843
>See this shit, think of my boys
>My boys get all the breaks they want
>I look out for my boys
>Other managers throw little tantrums about my boys, I chew them out infront of all the boys.
>In exchange, my boys do the work, they get shit down.
>I love my boys.

Bugmen shouldn't be allowed to run anything, simple as.