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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

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>> No.54054129 [View]
File: 37 KB, 480x360, 1472514425_image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
54054129

*screeching tone*
This is not a test, this is your Emergency Broadcast System. Announcing the commencement of the annual stock purge sanctioned by the U.S. Government. Bearish positions (long inverse ETFs, long puts, naked calls, short selling, long USD, long VIX) have been authorized for use during the purge. All other positions are restricted. Commencing at the siren, any and all selling (including naked short selling) will be legal. Circuit breakers will be unavailable until Tuesday morning at 8:30 a.m. when the purge concludes. Blessed be our new Federal Reserve and America... A nation reborn. May God be with you all.
*siren blares*

>> No.51105867 [View]
File: 37 KB, 480x360, 1472514425_image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
51105867

2 hours and 10 minutes before the purge begins.

>> No.49861714 [View]
File: 37 KB, 480x360, 1472514425_image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
49861714

>>49861667
Fucking bullshit. All (((holidays))) should be abolished.

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