/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>24052436
>Doing grocery shopping
>Make my way to the cereal aisle
>See a small Italian goblin jumping for the Corn Pops on the top shelf
>"Hey, big guy, can I help you get that?"
>"We're only in Phase 2. 113 is the answer"
>I have no clue what the fuck he is saying, so I ask again
>"As above, so below. Nothing can stop what is coming"
>He keeps hopping
>I just grab the Corn Pops and throw it in his kiddy cart
>He starts shaking and mumbling "London is ready" under his breath
>He tries to Hulk-rip his shirt off, but can only manage to stretch the neck
>"I didn't want this!" he squeaks
>"But you were reaching for it"
>He shits himself while calling me DeVry then Naruto runs away
>Out of curiosity, I follow him 3 aisles over, making sure he didn't see me
>He grabs a bag of popcorn and starts babachugging the kernels
>At that point, I knew I had found my lord and savior