/biz/ - Business & Finance

SERGEY IN T - 3 MINUTES EDITION

EVERYONE REMAIN CALM ITS HAPPENING

I am unironically, fundamentally financially ruined.

A suspected Oraclize developer and Jew was teaching a class on Mobius, known Pajeet scam.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Mobius and accept that it is the greatest technological breakthrough the world has ever known, even greater than McDonalds"

At this moment, a gigantic, 300 pound man with a stained shirt he wore for six years straight who had ate 1500 Big Macs in a row and understood the necessity of dipping sauce and fully supported all decisions made by the McDonalds Corporation rolled up to the professor.

"How do we get offchain data into smart contracts?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Poo-ishly and smugly replied "Mobius of course, you stupid Slavshit"

"Wrong. Chainlink presents a more efficient off-chain consensus mechanism with supporting reputation and security monitoring services that help users make informed API provider selections and achieve robust service even under aggressively adver-sarial conditions in a fully decentralized manner"

The professor was visibly shaken, and instantly shat all over the floor and all over his copy of the Mobius white paper. He stormed out of the room crying.

The students applauded and signed up to run a Link node that day and accepted Sergey of Nazareth as their lord and savior. An eagle named "SWIFT" flew into the room and perched atop the Link logo and shed a tear on the chalk. A pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a Link node for prayer API data.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the plague from swimming in the Ganges and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.

Semper Fi

Sergey “make you rich and steal your bitch” Nazarov