/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>52655514
Oh my goodness, is that you officer?
You would never believe it but this
this deranged man just jumped out of the bushes
he had spaghetti spilling out of his pockets and mayonnaise covering his hands! He demanded to see my phone and to pull out my RobinHood app. I said, "what?" and He replied
"What? What? You have to make sure you diversify ACROSS your portfolio to minimize losses! Let me see your meme stock holdings?!"
I swatted his greasy, hardening hands away from my person and immediately called the authorities! To my astonishment, he yelled "GODDAMN JANNIES" at the top of his lungs before running full sprint down the street towards the stop sign! He waited three seconds and looked both ways before crossing, officer.

WAGMI

>52635498
Something something paper hands, weak and pathetic. Sell those imaginary shares and let us buy them.