/biz/ - Business & Finance

Before I go to bed, I might as well come clean.

This whole thread was based on a lie. I have never bought crypto before in my life and I'm a total newfag.
It's only recently that I've gotten enough money to actually worry about investing and I wanted to see if crypto was still a valid venture in 2020.
However, the moment I stepped in /biz/, I noticed all the incoherent shilling and sperging. I needed a way to recognize the traits of a good crypto investment and not fall for a jeet scam.
I knew that if I admitted to being a newfag asking for advice, my thread would get ignored out of existence in no time flat.
Thus, I larped a plausibly dumb goof who made clearly bad investments and was at his wits end. This was punctuated with the character Gil Gunderson.
By making fundamentally false assertions about the nature of crypto, I baited /biz/ into explaining it to me. Nothing drives a person on the internet to explain something more than the pleasure of correcting someone who's clearly wrong.

I thought about just not breaking the character and letting you believe that there was an Anon who spent half a year investing in DOGE, but I figured I'd sleep better if I came clean.

Goodnight /biz/ and a genuine thank you, even if I was being deceitful.