/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>29374915
>>29375066
>>29375079
>>29375185
My name is Deano Bateman.
I'm 31 years old.
I live in the exclusive Leafy Gardens housing estate.
I've got a 62 inch plasma in every room.
I believe in taking care of myself with a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine.
In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my keepy uppies.
I can do over a thousand.
In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub.
Then I apply an herb-mint facialbalm.
I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol,
because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.
I like to relax with marathon Fifa tournaments and getting absolutely blind drunk.
For me, it's Smirnoff Ice.
Lol. I see your admiring my car?
Well, I recently took out a financial loan on a this based BMW.
I'm an entrepreneur.
I'm making big moves.
2021 is my year.

>>29126109
>>29126226
>that smell of fresh carpet
>that fine martian dust on all the surfaces
>that builders mcdonalds trash in the recycling box
>Deanoid cracks open the door on his new empire, letting the waft of fresh dome waft waftily over him, like cracking open that first can of the night
>his access card clatters down and echoes on the table, he cracks open his first fosters of the night, 3 pint cans in the fridge. bosh. home sweet home
>the stench of carpets begins to dull his senses
>he can't tell if he's warm or cold, his dome is so well insulated and it's completely silent.
>Deanoid hums chelsea dagger to himself. his own palace. he notices one of the brown letters that looks important
>sat in the middle of his "living room" floor (where the beanbag's going), Deanoid opens the letter
>'Congratulations on your new home. MR Dean Oswald, We hope that you are settling well. This is a note to notify you that we will commence taking payments of 4919 credits p/w/p.a/pp commencing as of the first of last month, not including the outstanding monthly and bimonthly interest inclusions at 299% APR per annum. Regards Conglomobank'.
>Deanoid's eyes see the words but none of it sinks in. he drops the letter and pulls a pizza menu towards him
>Fuck yeah! The local pizza place do donner meat on a pizza! The lads are gonna flip their shit!