/biz/ - Business & Finance

Biz, this is all I want in life. A Toyota Prius V. I drive for Uber and I have a shitty beat to hell 2005 Prius and of someone slams the door too hard it goes ape shit. Y’all are all driving around in your lambos- please help. I would need about 8k to get one. I’m old, fat, and stupid. How can I get 8k so I can get this and Uber drive in style? Pleas don’t tell me to suck 8,000 dicks for $1 per dick. Also, crippling depression and anxiety and severe penis disease prevent me from holding a normal job which is why I drive for Uber for a living. I’m counting on you to tell me what to do biz!!!!