/biz/ - Business & Finance

how's it going bros

>>55232888
Years ago i met in a Russian mosque a man called Imam Sergeyllah Nazaromedov. After a few prayers, we decided to finish praying at his place to get more hasanat, so he invited me to his condo. He was very pious, so he grabbed a piece of paper and he started to draw something, he told me to start praying while he watches me, so I went to do my normal prayer, but whenever I did sujud, Sergeyllah came at me from behind and helped me correct my sujud posture, but his crotch rubbed against my ass every time he did it and I could feel him getting harder and harder. I was also feeling my penis get harder and harder, which confused me and didn't let me focus on Allah, so I did what any good muslim man would do, get the bad thoughts out of the way by indulging them so I can pray 100%. I pulled my abaya up and Sergeyllah inserted his huge blessed penis inside my anus.I felt instantly stretched but it felt ecstatic, he was moaning so loud I was scared he would have a heart attack, sweat was driping all over me, and I was so lost in his love I forgot about god for a while.Then he came, what a divine ejaculation, it felt like warm comfort inside me, as soon as he pulled his penis out I clenched my anus to not waste one drop of that warm nectar. He then pulled my abaya down, came next to me, and we prayed together with our minds 100% concentrated on god. When we finished, he told me a sad story about a man who stole from thousands of mentally ill children and we both cried until our beards were wet. 9 months later I gave birth to our child, which shouldn't have happened since I'm a man, but the semen was so strong and was held for so long inside my body couldn't resist.

I will give Sergey all my savings. Take my money, master! Use my asshole as you wish! Everything i own is yours! DUMP ON ME

Gay - that's what I am.

Chainlink - that's what I hold.

My ass - that's where the cocks go.

Swallow - that's what I do to Sergey's sperm.

Black cocks - that's what goes in my mouth.

>>53858435
no

how do you do fellow businessmen

>>49460783
Thanks for reusing my shitty screencap. But for the last fucking time, staking is not happening at Consensus. There is literally no reason to believe this given the timeframe that they released this announcement. I genuinely don't understand you retards that are huffing hopium out of each other's asses. You should at least be grateful that staking will be implemented this year. With how fucking fat Sergey is these days, it's a miracle the team delivered anything at all. So just sit your ass down and wait like everyone else.

>>26178355

should i get out before its too late?

Cheers!

What's his endgame?

>>22715973
saturn time cube simulation (hypercube)

>>17795382
My sides are in orbit. Here’s the original image

Thank you, based past self.

>>16126644

>>14871339
I can tell that it's really you, fren; thanks for your continual good work, and please give a shout-out to the rest of the team from me and the boize here.

What did you think of me when we met in New York? I remember that you were inhaling through your mouth and exhaling (sharply) through your nose while listening to my brief questions & comments; did you find my odor to be, dare I say, STINKY?

0x5418ed09714B64caC15Fd83acCfa625c8399Dea6
This wallet constitutes (much of) my hodlings; am I gonna #makeit? How do I acquire more when SEC regs go into effect September 12th?

I'm currently a partner & manager at a small (twelve-acre) CBD hemp farm (harvest projected to net about $6 million just before Halloween), but, when I am done, I'll be fully refreshed by farmwork and ready to return to city work. I would very much like to join your team. I will not require monetary compensation thanks to the cash reserves which my current project (and others) are building, but would happily accept LINK in lieu of fiduciary compensation. Get at me. Adelyn has my email address (Jesusanon/LINKJesus). I'm also happy to consult, and would like to speak with you about connecting cannabis/hemp+ChainLink to ensure things like THC/CBD counts, strains, etc, etc....

Would you like to be a guest on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast? We can pull some strings (10,000 Linkmarines can make him aware and get you on). I would love to hear you btfo him with your philosophy degree after blowing his mind on ChainLink's potential.

Godspeed, you glorious plaid-wearing oracle-solver; $81k eoy 2026.

If you ever happened to randomly see Sergey in an airport would you approach him? What would you say?

>me on the right
I'm the reason that LINK is mooning. Why? Because...
>nofap for months
>pure hodler
>learn that binance is bowing to sec in a couple of months
>contemplate removing the last 567 link i still have on binance from the exchange to my offline wallet before binance closes it's doors to myself and other burgerlanders
>stare at the planet saturn in the night sky while smoking powerful marijuana
>say "fuck it; let's have some fun while fun's still allowed: lemme swingtrade a lil bit"
>set up buy/sell orders for link/eth pairs
>btc immediately starts mooning
>watching market
>swinging a few hundred link for fun
>eth goes to $350.00
>link goes over $2.50
>currently have 200 link & 3 eth on binance
>cold wallet still holds over 97% of my portfolio
See, I knew that the singularity was waiting for me to "try swinglinking" before starting to take off.
>mfw spent about half a million dollars in future profits to memetically fuel the rocketship to alpha centauri
You're welcome; thank me later at the yacht party.

0x5418ed09714B64caC15Fd83acCfa625c8399Dea6

He wasn't supposed to be hired to that position; I was....

Adelyn contacted me, and we spoke quite a bit. I was being vetted to join the team as representative & liaison to ChainLink's most dangerous community of enthusiasts: /biz/....

But I dropped the ball. I was overworked & superbaked on the day that I was asked to "come in," and just laid in bed, dabbing and shitposting before work, instead of just jumping in the shower and calling out of work.

>mfw unable to call out of work at solidly good job due to loyalty & character

This was my mistake; my fault. All of it. You could have had a totally based & bearded Messianic figure liaising betwixt /biz/rael & SmartContract.com instead of the limpwristed soiboi beardlette in op's pic. I'm sorry that my negligence ultimately saddled the community with yet another insufferable [redacted] who brings nothing substantive to the table except for weak virtue signals and a price bleedout to under a buck.

>unable to actually judge someone without meeting them in person first; maybe he's really not that bad

Fuck! I'd've fucking MOONED this shit, HARD, all the way to motherfucking SATURN & BEYOND had I actually followed through with the golden opportunity offered to me to work for SC & CL directly!

...sadly, I'm thoroughly entrenched in another project over a thousand miles away for the next several months.

When I return to New York later this year or next, I shall work to set things right; I shall take my rightful place on the ChainLink team.

>link $1k eoy

T. Jesusanon

>>14203062
unequivocally based

>>14136056
TOO LATE BITCH